Quotes / Fartillery

It appears that Melvin the Ninja has released some sort of fart bomb into the arena! Since it appears to be a natural weapon, it is allowed. But I might also have to point out it is very disgusting.

— Announcer, Minilife TV, "The Quarter Finals Begin"

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? WHAT TWISTED WORDS HAVE YOU CREATED WITH YOUR MORTAL ANUS?

— Alduin, Gamer Poop: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Episode 18.

Colonel: [Wario] also attacks by farting. He can fart to fly around, too.
Snake: By... farting. Are you kidding me?!
Colonel: Sadly, no. I am not kidding.

— Snake's Codec on Wario, Super Smash Bros. Brawl

Lardo: [Grabs them with his tail and shoves on his butt a lá Peter Griffin] Taste this~ [let it rip dealing both damage and leaving the enemy stinking effectively]

While life-forms that excrete foul musks to warn of danger are not rare, the doodlebug is the only species known to release flatulence when active above ground. Interestingly enough, since it is merely releasing the gas created by decay of the contents of the creature's intestines, it does not have a special musk-producing organ. This means the creature is in fact merely flatulating. Spectral analysis of the rank gas indicates it contains not only methane, but hydrogen sulfide as well, making the flatulence a Grade XIII biohazard.

— Olimar on the Doodlebug, Pikmin 2

"You mean it was a sort of killer belch?", I asked Dick-the-spokesperson from Our Embassy, trying to get a technical handle on the chemical process.
"More like a fart," Dick answered.

— Eveless Eden, by Marianne Wiggins

You won't escape my spiky aquarium of doom!
And what's more
I had chipotle for lunch
Now there's bubbles galore!
Bubbles full of poo-poo gas
How else could anybody weaponize a bubble?
Poison bubbles from my ass!
When you blow up, they're gonna see it from the Hubble!

— Bubble Man, Bubble Man With Lyrics

MY MUSTACHE HAS DEEMED THAT YOU GET MY WARIO STEAM!!!

— Stephen in the Wario Greentext Story

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