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Quotes / Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass

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Anime & Manga

Strong the Budo: That inferior Chojin is right, Nemesis. You've suffered enough injuries to keep on fighting.
Nemesis: I'm fine, sir! I can keep on fighting!
Strong the Budo: Do not make light of Kinnikuman!
Nemesis: Lord Enma...
Strong the Budo: You're fighting someone who managed to even decisively trump Goldman. He might look like a sniveling weakling, but he's extremely dangerous. You mustn't let him fool you.

"Naruto, you are the number one most unpredictable person!"
Sakura, Naruto

"I lost to him?"
Sasuke on Rock Lee, Naruto

Prince Ashitaka: Give back the head.
Jigo: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kid, listen, everybody wants to have everything in life, and now I might actually get it!
Prince Ashitaka: Don't make me kill you.
Jigo: Oh, you make it sound so easy.

Fan Works

Cinder: [Jaune] is not to be harmed in any way. In fact, we are to do our best to keep any and all harm away from him.
Mercury: Will that be hard? No offence, but he doesn't look particularly strong.
Cinder: He could rip your legs off with his hands tied behind his back.

Films — Live-Action

"Alright. You've had your fun. And if you don't clear out now... there'll be real trouble. I mean it."
David Sumner (Dustin Hoffman), Straw Dogs (1971)

"It turned out that the sweet-talking, tattoo-sporting pikey was a gypsy bare-knuckle boxing champion. Which makes him harder than a coffin nail. Right now, that's the last thing on Tommy's mind. If Gorgeous doesn't wake up in the next five minutes, Tommy knows he'll be buried with him. Why would the gypsies want to explain why a man died in their campsite? Not when they can just bury the pair of them and move camp. It's not like they got social security numbers, is it? Tommy- the tit- is praying. And if he's not- he fucking should be."

Literature

"You know, only meeting a fellow at lunch or at the races or loafing around country houses and so forth, you don’t get on to his hidden depths, if you know what I mean. Until this moment, if asked, I would have said that Tuppy Glossop was, on the whole, essentially a pacific sort of bloke, with little or nothing of the tiger of the jungle in him. Yet here he was, running to and fro with fire streaming from his nostrils, a positive danger to traffic."
Bertie Wooster, Jeeves and Wooster, The Ordeal of Young Tuppy

How the boy could be so clearheaded and resourceful in battle and so confused at all other times Tyrion could never comprehend.
Tyrion, about his squire Podrick Payne, A Storm of Swords

The trouble with witches is that they'll never run away from things they really hate. And the trouble with small furry animals in a corner is that, just occasionally, one of them's a mongoose.

Shawn groaned. If it had been Mum or Mistress Weatherwax, they'd have fought to the death. Mum was right - Magrat was always the nice soft one...
...Who'd just fired a crossbow through a keyhole.

Good old Josh. Just when you were ready to write him off, he kicked into gear, and when he did he really was indomitable. Like that time in Fillory when he'd beaten the red-hot giant with his black hole spell. He'd probably outlive them all.

Suddenly she saw [Mat] in a new light. A buffoon? No. A lion stuffed into a horse-stall might look like a peculiar joke, but a lion on the high plains was something very different. He was loose on the high plains, now. She felt a chill. What sort of a man had she entangled herself with?

Video Games

Sora: How'd a wimp like you get into Organization XIII? I bet you can't even fight.
Donald: Yeah, but we can!
Demyx: You shouldn't judge anyone by appearance.
...
Demyx: Oh, we do too have hearts! Don't be mad...
Donald: You can't trick us!
Demyx: Silence, traitor.

"I'd like to join the search, but they told me to stay here because I'm old. Seems nobody's aware of just how strong I really am."
Wess, Mother 3

"Well? Feel like taking me seriously yet, hmm?"

"Well, here's a better question. Do you wanna have a bad time? 'Cause if you take another step forward, you are REALLY not going to like what happens next."
Sans, Undertale
Web Animation

"My name is Michael J. Caboose. And I! Hate! Babies!"
— Textbook Ditz Michael J. Caboose, seconds before wiping out an entire army, Red vs. Blue

2020 mobbin' mythical crew!
We are Hololive: Myth, let me show you how we do!

DID YOU REALLY THINK I'D RAP LIKE THAT? SORRY, TOUGH LUCK
VOCALS GANGSTER AS CAN BE AND I'M STILL MOE AS FUCK
Mori Calliope, "ReaperかRapper?"

Webcomics

Doctor Light: What is your primary mission?
Megaman: To destroy the evil robots and stop Dr. Wily.
Doctor Light: Good. And your secondary mission?
Megaman: To be an idiot.
Beat
Doctor Light: Close enough. Let's get you a blaster.
Bob and George inadvertently justifying it

Western Animation

"Man, give that kid a ball and suddenly he is a hero!"
Numbuh 5 about Numbuh 4, after he saved them from a deadly dodgeball game, Codename: Kids Next Door

"I think the sidekick just stepped up, Monkey Style."
Shego, Kim Possible

"Now Homer Simpson is gonna show he has cojones!"

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