"As you all know, I hate Thanksgiving. The Pilgrims were murderers and turkey tastes like napkins."
— Jake Peralta, Brooklyn Nine-Nine
It's the least wonderful time of the year!
"I HATE WORKING CHRISTMAS! I HATE WORKING CHRISTMAS! STUPID, ANNOYING, PUSHY, LAST-MINUTE CUSTOMERS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!"
"I HATE WORKING CHRISTMAS! I HATE WORKING CHRISTMAS! STUPID, ANNOYING, PUSHY, LAST-MINUTE CUSTOMERS! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!"
— Jen, 6teen, "Deck the Mall"
FOR CHRIST MAS I WILL ATTEMPT TO RATIONALIZE MY DESTRUCTIVE SELF HATRED AND UNCEREMONIOUSLY FAIL TO SUCCEEd at anything whatsoever thank you
"This Whole Thing Smacks Of Gender," i holler as i overturn my uncle's barbeque grill and turn the 4th of July into the 4th of Shit
— dril
"I think there must be something wrong with me, Linus. Christmas is coming, but I'm not happy. I don't feel the way I'm supposed to feel. I just don't understand Christmas, I guess. I like getting presents, and sending Christmas cards, and decorating trees, and all that, but I'm still not happy. I always end up feeling depressed."
— Charlie Brown, A Charlie Brown Christmas
"I understand why we have holidays. We have holidays so people can get together and have fun. So, why am I alone?"
— Charlie Brown, It's the Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown
