"When you were partying, I studied the blade. When you were having premarital sex, I mastered the blockchain. While you wasted your days at the gym in pursuit of vanity, I cultivated inner strength. And now that the world is on fire and the barbarians are at the gate you have the audacity to come to me for help?"
— An infamous Internet image macro
◊
◊The Edgesmith: Bear witness... to the Ashforged Blade!
Hellswing: Aha ha ha ha! A sword made of ash? That is so pointlessly edgy! Is it held together by the "tears of the fallen" too? *snort*
The Edgesmith: [holding back tears] M-maybe...!
Hellswing: Aha ha ha ha! A sword made of ash? That is so pointlessly edgy! Is it held together by the "tears of the fallen" too? *snort*
The Edgesmith: [holding back tears] M-maybe...!
— Swords
Tadano: My name is Tadano Hitohito. I'm in the second year of middle school. And as you can see, [glances towards the reader] I'm not a normal person.
Narration: Chuuni point number one: looking at non-existent cameras. Chuuni point number two: Thinking to yourself "I'm not a normal person."
"Though he wanted desperately to fight in World War 2, the Soldier was rejected from every branch of the U.S. military. Undaunted, he bought his own ticket to Europe. After arriving and finally locating Poland, the Soldier taught himself how to load and fire a variety of weapons before embarking on a Nazi killing spree for which he was awarded several medals that he designed and made himself. His rampage ended immediately upon hearing about the end of the war in 1949."
— The Soldiers' Biography, Team Fortress 2
"In fact, Mike Posner was a particular breed of dork. (Picture of Andy Bernard) The frat dork. Most tragic of all the dorks. (Picture of a man dressed for a convention) This guy is also a total dork, but he owns it. He's happy doing what he's doing. But the frat dork can never truly embrace his dork-dom, instead chasing an image of cool that he will never have the charisma to achieve! This is infinitely lamer than the cosplayer. And all that sweaty try-hard insecurity permeates all his pop singles!"
—Todd in the Shadows, reviewing "I Took a Pill in Ibiza" by Mike Posner
"I see my time has come! I am Don Quixote! Do you carry a dream, Manager Esquire? Verily, I do! I shall bring about a world where justice prevails! Does this not pique your curiosity?"
— Don Quixote introducing herself in Limbus Company
