"Okay. So my mom drops me at this boarding school, and I'm thinking it's like all the other places I've gone. Students. Teachers. Principal. You know, like normal schools. But it's not. Weird stuff happens here. Really weird stuff. And what's this guy doing here? Something's going on, and someone's behind it. And we're going to get to the bottom of it. There's nothing wrong at Blake Holsey High."
— The unimaginably vague Opening Narration to Black Hole High