Subtrope of Battleaxe Nurse
, a very uncaring member of the "caring profession". This is a triage nurse, staffing the desk in the waiting room, who sorts patients not according to severity or urgency, but according to their own whims and twisted love of power.
There is a tendency for many people (who don't understand the concept of triage) to decide that the ER staff is indulging in this, even when they aren't. Add to that that the desk staff at an ER have to be firm about who they're calling, but can't explain to the other patients why they're being taken in that order, and you get an appearance of petty tyranny. While desk nurses are the most likely to get this portrayal, medical personnel in general are often seen as petty dictators who are unreasonable about things like visiting hours; admittance to the ICU; flowers, candy and food being brought to the patients; and all the other annoyances about having a loved one in the hospital.
Of course it should go without saying that in Real Life
there are very good reasons for all these rules. Sometimes that is illustrated dramatically with a medical emergency that happens right in front of the complainer and the triage nurse has to go into action while the complainer realizes that there are higher medical priorities he must respect.
Related to Obstructive Bureaucrat
. Coworker of the Battleaxe Nurse
and Dr. Jerk
- She's not a nurse, but the "bereavement liaison" in Little Miss Sunshine certainly qualifies.
- Deconstructed in Gridlock'd. The two main characters, junkies on the run from some hoodlums and the law, are desperately trying to get into rehab. They repeatedly bounce off of gridlock and red tape while talking to a number of overworked and indifferent bureaucrats. While the junkies rage at the obvious dysfunction of the system, the bureaucrats get their own licks at the junkies, showing how there are many other people just like them jockeying for the same limited resources and that the world doesn't stop simply because they suddenly decide to ask for help.
- Bringing Out the Dead has the triage nurse giving lectures to the patients that come in. "Let me get this straight. You snorted cocaine and now you feel like your heart is going to explode. We didn't buy you the cocaine, we didn't shove it up your nose..."
- In the first novel of the Star Trek: Vanguard series, the Bombay's CMO complains bitterly about "battlefield triage" - she and her staff can't treat crewmen who may need their help the most if they aren't critical to keeping the ship from being destroyed while under attack. To her, it feels like a perversion of the Hippocratic Oath.
- Friends, the one who ends up with a face full of hockey puck.
- One Tree Hill: "I didn't like cheerleaders when I was in school" "But she's pregnant and in pain!" "Guess who's waiting a little longer?"
- M*A*S*H: Given that the camp typically receives dozens of wounded at a time at least, triage is a matter of life and death every time, which has lead to disputes:
- In one episode, Frank Burns deliberately sends in American troops over Koreans even when there are Koreans in much greater need than soldiers.
- The above is also a prime example of a bureaucratic mentality. Regulations say "Americans first, allies second, enemies last." Nothing about severity or urgency...
- In another episode, Hawkeye is on the bus doing triage, and gets into a fight with a soldier over being a commie-lover by prioritising seriously wounded North Koreans over wounded American soldiers.
- Nicole Sullivan, as the "Vancome lady", as a nurse in MADtv. She kept turning people away for stupid reasons. They'd describe their emergency and she'd explain, in chirpy tones, why they should head down the street. The only one I remember was a hemophiliac who was told that Sisters of Mercy didn't support that lifestyle... Link to the episode (until it's removed)
- Star Trek: Voyager:
- In "Critical Care," the holographic Doctor gets stolen and sold to an alien hospital, where patients are assessed not according to urgency, but according to how "valuable" their skills are to society. As a result, the working classes suffer in crowded, undersupplied halls while the rich recover in luxury. In the Doctor's efforts to help, both the Prime Directive and the Hippocratic Oath get severely bent.
- In "Latent Image," The Doctor is faced with two patients (Harry Kim and a Red Shirt) who have an exactly equal chance of survival. He can only treat one of them in time, and the other will die. Because his program cannot find a logical way to decide, he chooses to save Harry because he's a friend. This causes a severe malfunction in his program that forces the crew to erase his memory of the event or risk losing their only medical officer.
- In the two-part episode "The Killing Game," the ship is taken over by Hirogen who place the crew into brutal holographic simulations and force the doctor to treat them. When a crewmember with life-threatening injuries and a Hirogen with minor burns are both brought in, the Hirogen medical officer orders the doctor to treat the Hirogen patient first. He protests that this goes against the rules of triage is that critical injuries take priority. The Hirogen replies "your rules, not mine" and deactivates him when he refuses to comply.
- A Variation occurs in "Author, Author"—The Doctor has written a holo-novel in which the user plays the part of an EMH in a triage situation. A bridge officer is brought in with a minor concussion, but there is already a patient dying from a ruptured aorta. Captain Jenkins (Captain Janeway's Evil Counterpart) ends the debate by shooting the poor Red Shirt.
- Justified in an episode of The Big Bang Theory. Howard is faking an allergic reaction to keep Leonard's birthday party a secret, and the nurse refuses to play along. She looks like a tyrant when she tells Leonard that Howard is not a legitimate patient - until Howard appears having actually eaten nuts and given himself a severe reaction.
- The Emergency! episode, "Musical Mania," had two yokels taking their son with a bad case of lead poisoning and the emitting nurse brusquely tells them to wait while she fills out a report. However, Head Nurse McCall immediately tells her to process them, noting that people in need take priority over bureaucracy any day.
- In the Codename: Kids Next Door episode "Operation: H.O.S.P.I.T.A.L., Sector V had to get into a hospital to rescue an injured operative who later turned out to be Bradley, because operatives who were treated there were being assaulted. Numbuh One had no luck with the triage nurse; even though she seemed friendly and harmless, she didn't take his authoritarian demands seriously. Numbuh Five, who was more polite and often the Only Sane Member of the team had more luck and got some information, but was still unable to get them admitted formally. Despite this, seeing as Adults Are Useless in this cartoon (the ones who aren't evil, anyway), sneaking in was surprisingly easy, and no-one tried to stop them. Lucky thing too, because Bradley was targeted by the assailant, who happened to be Numbuh Five's evil sister Cree.
- In reality, there's a federal law called EMTALA that requires hospitals and EMS services to at least assess a patient to determine how much of an emergency the patient really has. Once the patient walks through the hospital doors or is brought in by ambulance, they have to be seen and can't be sent away until they are considered stabilized. If the patient isn't really that sick or injured, then they'll get the basic assessment and put in the triage queue to wait until there's room for the less sick and injured.
People who abuse this law just to get attention or watch the parade of gore cases go by are known as GOMERs. Nothing to do with Jim Nabors or Leonard Lawrence, it's an acronym that stands for "Get Out Of My Emergency Room!"
- One of the cruel realities of any mass casualty incident, such as a large multi-vehicle wreck in the middle of nowhere or something on the scale of Katrina or September 11th, is that not everyone can be saved, even with the miracles of modern medicine. On the same venue, time spent dealing with those patients who cannot be helped will cause those that can to die. Enter the principle of Simple Triage and Rapid Treatment. If you can walk: Priority 3, help carry the person next to you over to the casualty collection point. If you can't walk, but follow commands, Priority 2: We'll get to you as soon as we can. On the other hand, if the only thing you do is breathe or babble incoherently, you get out of there pretty fast: Priority 1. Unsurvivable injuries, such as massive burns or amputations, no pulse, or no spontaneous breathing? Expectant/Morgue.