History Main / PityingPerversion

->''"All sympathy given to victims is treacherous. The love is directed exclusively to a victim whom one consider oneself superior to. [...] It's a human psychological mechanism to be excited at the chance to help someone who is weaker, a victim. But this only works for as long as this hierarchy is firmly in place."''
%%If you have the official English translation of 3096 days, please update this quote. I only have the Swedish translation, did my own translation to English from there.
-->-- '''Natascha Kampusch''', in the epilogue of ''3096 days''

Poor Bob! [[AllOfTheOtherReindeer He's not exactly the same way as everyone else.]] And as we all know, [[FalseDichotomy there's only two kinds of people]]: The good normal people who are like us, and the people who are not like us and who are thus lesser than us. And thus, Bob ought to be grateful that Alice is such a wonderful person who looks down on him with mercy instead of hatred. While she would never consider him an equal, she pities him for not being like her.

Alice is prejudiced, and her pity is likely to actually hurt Bob: Either by [[DontYouDarePityMe angering him]] or by encouraging him to [[InternalizedCategorism resent himself for being a lesser kind of person than Alice]].

Alice is certain to [[InnocentBigot consider herself Good]]. While this belief is misguided, [[TroubledSympatheticBigot she might actually be a very sympathetic character as she struggles with her own prejudice]]. Her position might also give her a lot of grief, as her fellow bigots [[WithUsOrAgainstUs consider her a traitor]] for not being enthusiastic about TorchesAndPitchforks. As she listens to Bob and starts understanding that he actually has a point, she might also [[WrongGenreSavvy be very ashamed of letting herself fall for his heresies and fear that she is turning Evil by listening to him]].

Bob might be [[CursedWithAwesome a superpowered mutant]], gay, or maybe even [[ASinisterClue left-handed]]. But whatever's "wrong" with him, it's only wrong according to Alice (and her peers, if any): It's not portrayed by the narrative as ''actually'' being wrong. If Bob actually ''is'' evil, see instead BadPowersBadPeople, DepravedHomosexual or similar.

Note that the thing Alice pities Bob for doesn't have to be something Bob cares about or even notices. Being left-handed or whatever didn't make Bob feel different until Alice started yapping about it. One of them is likely to come across as BlueAndOrangeMorality here, but which one really depends on the situation. Of course, the whole drama may very well [[NeverLiveItDown be about a single incident rather than something that is a regular part of Bob's life]]. This is also a tactic that is commonly employed by {{Fan Hater}}s and ComplainingAboutPeopleNotLikingTheShow, a la "It's a shame you suffer from this affliction that's causing you to like/dislike X." Very much {{Truth In Television}}.

In the real world this tendency is usually associated with the political right (''especially'' where homosexuality and bisexuality are concerned). However, it can also show up on the left, with social democrats/socialists taking a condescending view of the poor even as they try to improve their lives.

Sometimes a version or subversion of your run-of-the-mill StrawmanPolitical. Compare MoralGuardians, WindmillPolitical, InternalizedCategorism, BlackAndWhiteInsanity and HeteronormativeCrusader. Contrast ForHappiness.
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!!Examples

[[AC:AnimeAndManga]]
* In ''Manga/{{Bleach}}'', this was the attitude Neliel had towards DeathSeeker Nnoitra and even said to him that he was an "animal" compared to her.

[[AC:ComicBooks]]
* Common in the works of the German cartoonist Ralf König. A good example is a show-within-a-show-within-the-comic. The protagonist is a film critic with a Pitying Perversion bias. He show the audience a movie where Pitying Perversion is built into the narrative. The comic start with the film critic ranting about how movies these days are naive and shallow when it comes to homosexuality, making horrible mistakes such as portraying gays as capable of happiness and meaningful lives. Then he shows his own favorite movie. It's about gays getting beaten to death and falling in love with each other as they lie dying in the hospital. After the movie, he feels so sorry for the poor poor little homos that he pretty much has a nervous breakdown.
* In one strip of ''TheFeelingPrinceCharlesHad'', a heterosexual character talks to a homosexual and holds a little well-meaning rant about how he thinks it's okay to be gay, ending with wondering when we will ever get rid of homophobia and start treating homosexuals as equals. The reply: "Maybe when you no longer feel you need to give me permission".
* [[http://www.detrasdelespejo.es/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/son-como-nosotros-quino.jpg This comic Strip]] from Joaquin Lavado ({{Quino}}) is titled "They are JustLikeUs." Here comes a translation:
--> This “globalization” issue let us to realize that the people of other races and cultures fall in love, JustLikeUs.
--> And, like us, make love, and children are born of that love. Children that they love and care about, [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment just like us]].
--> And they need music to express themselves, dance and have fun, [[RuleOfThree just like us]].
--> And they weep his sorrows in tears as ours own tears, and laugh out loud their joys with laughter, [[RunningGag just like us]].
--> They even rent the same movies that we see and eat the same fast food with the same soda that we drink here.
--> What shows us all of this? [[AnAesop That THEY, only apparently so different, ARE JUST LIKE US!]]
--> {{BEAT}}
--> It sounds so easy to say: [[PityingPerversion "They are just like us!"]] How long time will it take for us to even begin to say [[NotSoDifferent "We are just like them"]]?

[[AC:{{Film}}]]
* Angel's father in ''[[Film/{{X-Men}} X-Men: The Last Stand]]'': His quest to help his son is a classic example, only fueling the son's self-hatred. As he caught his young Angel trying to cut off his own wings, he reacted with revulsion to the fact that his son was a Mutant. He then dedicated his life to trying to "cure" his son from being a mutant.
* ''TheBreakfastClub'' This is Claire's attitude towards the unpopular kids in school, particularly Bender. Her popularity and friends influence her to be mean to those "beneath her," and much of her conflict stems from hating the fact that this is so.
* Played with by the protagonists of ''{{Inception}}'' as they write the story of the DreamWithinADream. [[spoiler:Their target is a young heir who they intend to manipulate to make a certain business decision. There is some resentment between him and his dead father, with the father's last word to him being "disappointed". The protagonists resolve this by giving him a fake epiphany...]]
-->[[spoiler:'''Son:''' I know, you were disappointed because I couldn't be you.]]
-->[[spoiler:'''Father:''' No... I was disappointed... because you tried.]]
* ''{{Secretary}}'' is one of the very very few romantic comedies with a masochist as the protagonist. It is also the perhaps ''only'' romantic comedy that starts with the protagonist getting signed out from a mental hospital and has a lot of [[BrokenBird heavy mental problems]] that are not PlayedForLaughs at all.
* The main conflict in ''TheSMJudge'' is about how the prosecutor and others are trying to cast Magda in the role of the poor little victim who everyone should feel sorry for - never mind that the prosecutor himself is the only one having a real harmful influence on her life. Ironically, she didn't get any help neither when she [[InternalizedCategorism hated herself for being a masochist]] or when she got abused for real by her previous husband. Nope, the pity comes only ''after'' she has turned her life around so that everything is going great.
* In Film/{{Mammoth}}, believing prostitution to be horrible, Leo keep feeling sorry for Cookie. He does this in a way that's actually shaming her and would damage her emotionally if she [[InternalizedCategorism internalized it]].

[[AC:{{Literature}}]]
* In Lois Bujold's "Mirror Dance," a scene at the end comes when the beautiful, powerful, and highly competent and respected mercenary officer Elena Bothari-Jezek reports to the short, crippled, morbidly obese Lord Mark, about [[spoiler:destroying the records of his horrific experience of being repeatedly raped, tortured, and even forcefed over a period of days]] as Mark lays there while everyone else is busying themselves with carrying out the terms of the happy ending Mark had arranged for them. When she places her hand on his arm and expresses her pity, the result is a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. "Don't you DARE pity me. I WON!"
* In ''3096 Days'' and ''I Choose Life'', the autobiographies of Natascha Kampusch and Sabine Dardenne, they both spend the last part of their books discussing this trope. Both women were kidnapped as kids, and after they got free they experienced that people tried to reduce them to a victimhood-role that was basically there for these people to feel better about themselves at the victim's expense.
* Literature/DonQuixote in the first part of the novel give us The Barber and the Curate, two MoralGuardians, and in the second part LoonyFan Sanson Carrásco, whose sincere desire to help that poor fool, Don Quixote and cure his madness is sabotaged by this attitude, rendering all of them into ThresholdGuardians. ([[NotSoDifferent Also, all three do things to help him that could be easily described as “crazy”]])

[[AC:LiveActionTV]]
* Occurs in the "Early 21st Century Romanticism" episode of ''Series/{{Community}}''; when Britta makes a friend who is a lesbian, she uses this as an excuse to not-so-subtly brag about what a politically correct person she is. At one point, the rather naive and sheltered Annie curiously asks her some questions about her friend, and Britta uses this as an excuse to condescendingly lecture her on her 'homophobia' and how it makes her a lesser person.
** Of course, [[spoiler: Britta's "lesbian" friend was doing the same thing. She was straight and befriended Britta for exactly the same reasons]]
* In an episode of {{Fringe}}, a doctor with a paraplegic son was killing other paraplegics in an attempt to find a cure for his son's condition. When the son found out, he was not only horrified by the murders his father was committing, but incredibly hurt that his father didn't accept him the way he was.
* An episode of SavedByTheBell had Zack dating a [[DisabledLoveInterest paraplegic girl]]. He was very considerate to her, but to such an extent that he slid into this trope. She called him out on it and broke up with him by the end of the episode.

[[AC:{{Music}}]]
* Nanne Grönvall's song "Fördomar" (Prejudice) plays this for laughs. The whole song is about the protagonist bragging about how she's a perfect MarySue who [[NoExceptYes do not have]] any prejudice whatsoever. The first verse is simply about how great and open-minded she is in general. The second verse is the Alice of this trope, expecting gratitude from gays for not despising them. The rest of the song goes downhill from there with blatant racism (against blacks AND whites), sexism (against men AND women), ageism (against young people AND old people) and so on.

[[AC:VisualNovels]]
* ''VisualNovel/KatawaShoujo'' plays with this trope in a few ways. Being a game about {{disabled love interest}}s, it's easy to fall into this, and is the cause for some {{bad ending}}s. ''Especially'' [[spoiler:[[TheWoobie Hanako's]]]].
** Ironic since its arguably the basis of the game
** Ironic in one way, but this is basically the real life playing out of the "sympathetic bigot" part of the trope. Not knowing led to ignorant pitying, but once the creators actually began researching and talking to people they developed a more nuanced portrayal of the people involved (for example, the main obstacles in the characters lives are rarely their disabilities but their own emotional/psychological problems that can stem from their disabilities but don't necessarily have to.)

[[AC:WebComics]]
* In ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'', Cronus believes that one of his best qualities is how he doesn't ''nearly'' make as big a deal about the fact that he's a [[BlueBlood seadweller]] as he could and that the others should be thankful he's such a progressive guy. After all, he ''could'' lord it over them, but he actually stoops to their level to see them as equals! What more do they want? Kankri also has a tendency to fall into this at times, [[InnocentBigot even though he expressly argues against this kind of thing]].

[[AC:RealLife]]
* This was actually the start of liberalization towards homosexuality in the western world: Instead of criminals, they were now considered only sick. Not that anyone would consider this progressive nowadays, since SocietyMarchesOn, and people suffered from it. Still, without this first step, homosexuality might still be considered a crime.
** The progression was pretty much from "criminals" (19th century) to "mentally ill" (most of the 20th century) to TheWoobie (1970s through 1990s) to PositiveDiscrimination (1990s and 2000s), and finally to the (generally) nuanced portrayals of today.
* Autism Speaks has the goal of curing [[UsefulNotes/HighFunctioningAutism Autism]]. You might say it has good intentions, but many autistic individuals dislike the way they portray autism.
** Many autistic individuals would rather have the unique accomplishments of autistic musicians, artists, scientists and inventors held up to say "These people are different, but also important to the world" rather than "These people are broken, pity and help us fix them."
* [[http://www.cracked.com/article_19549_5-old-timey-prejudices-that-still-show-up-in-every-movie_p2.html#ixzz1hR3yzdot This cracked article, "5 old timey prejudices that still show up in every movie"]] argues that this attitude from the white people is why there are not non-white protagonists of Blockbuster movies (except WillSmith). And ''especially'' not in a relationship with a white female character.
--> Again, [[MisBlamed we can blame]] [[HollywoodStyle the studios all we want]]. [[LowestCommonDenominator But they've learned from hard experience that for the most part]], [[PityingPerversion if they don't play to our prejudices,]] [[UnfortunateImplications we simply won't go see their movie.]]
* Poor introverts, being born preferring time alone or with one close friend to wild parties, and thinking rather than filling a room with hot air. Is there anything we can do to cure them of this illness?
* Some of the implications of naturalization are how better off someone is to have their cultural identity replaced by the local stuff.
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->''All sympathy given to victims is treacherous. The love is directed exclusively to a victim whom one consider oneself superior to. [...] It's a human psychological mechanism to be excited at the chance to help someone who is weaker, a victim. But this only works for as long as this hierarchy is firmly in place.''

-->--'''Natascha Kampusch''', in the epilogue of ''3096 days''

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!!!Examples
[[AC: AnimeAndManga]]
* In ''Anime/{{Bleach}}'', this was the attitude Neliel had towards DeathSeeker Nnoitra and even said to him that he was an "animal" compared to her.

* ''KatawaShoujo'' plays with this trope in a few ways. Being a game about {{disabled love interest}}s, it's easy to fall into this, and is the cause for some {{bad ending}}s. ''Especially'' [[spoiler:[[TheWoobie Hanako's]]]].

* In ''{{Homestuck}}'', Cronus believes that one of his best qualities is how he doesn't ''nearly'' make as big a deal about the fact that he's a [[BlueBlood seadweller]] as he could and that the others should be thankful he's such a progressive guy. After all, he ''could'' lord it over them, but he actually stoops to their level to see them as equals! What more do they want? Kankri also has a tendency to fall into this at times, [[InnocentBigot even though he expressly argues against this kind of thing]].

* In ''[[Anime/{{Bleach}}]]'', this was the attitude Neliel had towards DeathSeeker Nnoitra and even said to him that he was an "animal" compared to her.

** Ironic since its arguably the basis of the game

* This was actually the start of liberalization towards homosexuality in the western world: Instead of criminals, they were now considered only sick. Not that anyone would consider this progressive nowadays, since SocietyMarchesOn. Still, without this first step, homosexuality might still be considered a crime.
** The progresion was pretty much from "criminals" (19th century) to "mentally ill" (most of the 20th century) to TheWoobie (1970s through 1990s) to PositiveDiscrimination (1990s and 2000s), and finally to the (generally) nuanced portrayals of today.

* [[http://www.cracked.com/article_19549_5-old-timey-prejudices-that-still-show-up-in-every-movie_p2.html#ixzz1hR3yzdot This cracked article, "5 old timey prejudices that still show up in every movie"]] argues that this attitude from the white people is why there are not non-white protagonists of Blockbuster movies (except WillSmith).

* Some of the implications of naturalization are how better off someone is to have their cultural identity replaced by the local stuff

Note that the thing Alice pities Bob for doesn't have to be something Bob cares about or even notices. Being left-handed or whatever didn't make Bob feel different until Alice started yapping about it. One of them is likely to come across as BlueAndOrangeMorality here, but which one really depends on the situation. Of course, the whole drama may very well [[NeverLiveItDown be about a single incident rather than something that is a regular part of Bob's life]]. This is also a tactic that is commonly employed by {{Fan Hater}}s and ComplainingAboutPeopleNotLikingTheShow, a la "It's a shame you suffer from this affliction that's causing you to like/dislike X." Very much {{Truth In Television}}.

Bob might be [[CursedWithAwesome a superpowered mutant]], [[DepravedHomosexual gay]] or whatever, maybe even [[ASinisterClue left-handed]]. But whatever's "wrong" with him, it's only wrong according to Alice (and her peers, if any): It's not portrayed by the narrative as ''actually'' being wrong. If Bob actually ''is'' evil, see instead BadPowersBadPeople, DepravedHomosexual or similar.

[[AC:AnimeAndManga]]
* Arguably can apply to ''{{Bleach}}'''s Neliel Tu Oderschvank - she openly tells Nnoitra that she pities him because he is "an animal" in comparison to her and cannot comprehend his motivations towards fighting or his reasons for living. Naturally, he does not take this well.

* In the ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'' episode "Cardassians", the main characters do a creepy case of PityingPerversion by [[StrawAffiliation deciding Rugal's identity for him against his will]], and then insisting that he's suffering from InternalizedCategorism because the identity they have chosen for him [[spoiler:and eventually condemned him to, by giving him away to the stranger Ben decided deserved him the most - by virtue of being his biological father and the victim of a political conspiracy]] is one he hates.

[[AC:AnimeAndManga]]
* Arguably can apply to ''{{Bleach}}'''s Neliel Tu Oderschvank - she openly tells Nnoitra that she pities him because he is "an animal" in comparison to her and cannot comprehend his motivations towards fighting or his reasons for living. Naturally, he does not take this well.

* In the ''StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'' episode ''Cardassians'', the main characters do a creepy case of PityingPerversion by [[StrawAffiliation deciding Rugal's identity for him against his will]], and then insisting that he's suffering from InternalizedCategorism because the identity they have chosen for him [[spoiler:and eventually condemned him to, by giving him away to the stranger Ben decided deserved him the most - by virtue of being his biological father and the victim of a political conspiracy]] is one he hates.

* Inverted in the John Updike novel ''Rabbit Redux'', in which a white character angrily tells a black character that he does ''not'' pity Negroes and that they need to get over their narcissism in thinking that American society was set up for the sole purpose of screwing them over. He also mentions that life in America has not always been easy for white people, either, and the subtext seems to be that he thinks ''whites'' are the ones who deserve sympathy for constantly being [[EverythingIsRacist accused of racism]].

* This was actually the start of liberalization towards homosexuality in the western world: Instead of criminals, they were now considered only sick. Not that anyone would consider this progressive nowadays, since SocietyMarchesOn. Still, without this first step, homosexuality might still be considered a crime.

* [[http://www.detrasdelespejo.es/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/son-como-nosotros-quino.jpg This comic Strip]] from Joaquin Lavado ({{Quino}}) is titled "They are just like us." Here comes a translation:
--> This “globalization” issue let us to realize that the people of other races and cultures fall in love, just like us.

* Common in the works of the German cartoonist Ralf König. A good example is a show-within-a-show-within-the-comic. The protagonist is a film critic who runs on Pitying Perversion Type A and shows the audience a movie that runs on Pitying Perversion Type B. The comic start with the film critic ranting about how movies these days are naive and shallow when it comes to homosexuality, making horrible mistakes such as portraying gays as capable of happiness and meaningful lives. Then he shows his own favorite movie. It's about gays getting beaten to death and falling in love with each other as they lie dying in the hospital. After the movie, he feels so sorry for the poor poor little homos that he pretty much has a nervous breakdown.

** In all fairness to the main characters, Rugal's adoptive parents hate Cardassians and raised Rugal to do the same, despite the fact that Rugal is biologically a Cardassian.

* Occurs in the "Early 21st Century Romanticism" episode of ''{{Community}}''; when Britta makes a friend who is a lesbian, she uses this as an excuse to not-so-subtly brag about what a politically correct person she is. At one point, the rather naive and sheltered Annie curiously asks her some questions about her friend, and Britta uses this as an excuse to condescendingly lecture her on her 'homophobia' and how it makes her a lesser person.

-->[[spoiler:Son: I know, you were disappointed because I couldn't be you.]]
-->[[spoiler:Father: No... I was disappointed... because you tried.]]

** Since autistics grow up perceiving the world differently than neurotypical people, many autistic individuals would rather have the unique accomplishments of autistic musicians, artists, scientists and inventors held up to say "These people are different, but also important to the world" rather than "These people are broken, pity and help us fix them."

* Angel's father in ''[[Film/{{X-Men}} X-Men: The Last Stand]]'': His quest to help his son is utterly misguided, only fueling the son's self-hatred. As he caught his young Angel trying to cut off his own wings, he reacted with revulsion to the fact that his son was a Mutant rather than to the fact that he was harming himself. He then dedicated his life to trying to "cure" his son from being a mutant, instead of helping himself and his son to accept him for who he is. Eventually the son rebels against this, eventually leading him to use his mutant power to save his Father's life.
* ''TheBreakfastClub'' This is Claire's attitude towards the unpopular kids in school, particularly Bender. Her popularity and friends force her to be mean to those "beneath her," and much of her conflict stems from hating the fact that this is so.

* ''{{Secretary}}'' is one of the very very few romantic comedies with a masochist as the protagonist. It is also the perhaps ''only'' romantic comedy that starts with the protagonist getting signed out from a mental hospital and has a lot of [[BrokenBird heavy mental problems]] that are not PlayedForLaughs at all. Also, when she tries to date around to find a new partner to satisfy her masochism, all guys she encounter are worse than pathetic.

* A PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad parody occurs in the "Early 21st Century Romanticism" episode of ''{{Community}}''; when Britta makes a friend who is a lesbian, she uses this as an excuse to not-so-subtly brag about what a politically correct person she is. At one point, the rather naive and sheltered Annie curiously asks her some questions about her friend, and Britta uses this as an excuse to condescendingly lecture her on her 'homophobia' and how it makes her a lesser person. [[spoiler: Then it turns out the friend is in fact ''not'' a lesbian, and in fact was only hanging out with Britta because she thought Britta was the lesbian.]]

Of course, this pity is actually not a good thing: Alice is prejudiced, and her pity is likely to actually hurt Bob: Either by [[DontYouDarePityMe angering him]] or by encouraging him to [[InternalizedCategorism resent himself for being a lesser kind of person than Alice]].