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Not So Different

Phantom Limb: Thank you. We're not so different, you and I.
Brock: Yeeeaah, I don't need another "we're not so different" speech. I get those a lot.
Phantom Limb: Yes I'm sure you do.
The Venture Brothers

Two characters who seem radically different turn out to have more in common than they would like to believe.

As a good thing, the frequent resolution of an Enemy Mine or Locked In A Freezer plot: two enemies learn that there is more that unites them than divides them. The punch line to about 50% of plots in an Odd Couple series.

As a bad thing, the realization that our hero is really just a hair's breadth away from villainy. In these cases, it's almost always the villain who is the first to notice: our hero has him cornered and even seems to relish the prospect of finally ridding himself of his nemesis, and the villain deftly points out, "We're not so different after all." The hero realizes how close he is to crossing the line, and spares the villain (though every once in a great while, he'll decide that it's worth crossing the line, off the villain anyway, and then have several episodes of moral anguish over the darkness in his soul: see Shoot The Dog). Especially common when the villain is the hero's Evil Counterpart.

Also a bad thing when the bad guy points it out after the hero has bested him through questionable tactics.

Often followed by the hero's hysterical protests along the lines of, "I'm not like you! I'll never be like you!"

Occasionally followed by the hero's observation that they are different, because of some other aspect that the opponent overlooked or intentionally ignored.

The hero should have some snappier comeback, like "You noticed?" or "That's why I can beat you," and worry about the differences later - or a comment that the dog that protects the flock is a very close relative of the wolf that ravages it.

Sometimes goes hand-in-hand with a Double Aesop or We Can Rule Together.

Can also be phrased, "You would have made a good thief/assassin/Klingon/Mandalorian/Dalek/Minbari/Troper/Wikipedian."

Examples

Anime
  • The Big O: Big Bad Alex Rosewater never gets sick of pointing out that hero Roger Smith is just as arrogant, power-hungry, and obsessive as he is, for manipulating a giant robot to fulfill his personal moral agenda.
  • Mugen and Jin in Samurai Champloo. Pointed out by Fuu within her diary, much to both's displeasure.
  • Yu-Gi-Oh GX: Yubel informs Amon during their duel that he's just like her — they both destroy the ones they love.
  • Yu-Gi-Oh has several, but a notable one is in the DOMA arc. Raphael, one of Dartz's henchmen, is convinced that the Pharaoh is evil, and tries to prove this to him by making him play the Seal Of Orichalchos field spell card that feeds off of the darkness in people. He succeeds, and wins as a result.
  • Spike and Vicious have a moment like this during their standoff in the Cowboy Bebop episode, "Ballad of Fallen Angels":
    Vicious: You should see yourself. Do you have any idea what you look like right at this moment, Spike?
    Spike: (with a savage grin on his face) What?
    Vicious: A ravenous beast. The same blood runs through both of us. The blood of a beast that wanders, hunting for the blood of others.
    Spike: I've bled all that kind of blood away.
    Vicious: Then why are you still alive?!
    • The anime also parodies this trope with Andy, Spike's one-shot foil whose similarities to the protagonist are so prominent as to be lampshaded repeatedly by the remaining cast. Naturally, the two hate each other's guts with a passion — well, Spike hates Andy's guts. Andy can't even remember Spike's name for most of the episode, which only serves to infuriate the protagonist further.
  • Fullmetal Alchemist: Happens a few times. Lampshaded in "The Phantom Thief":
    Edward: It's funny. Every crook I meet wants to tell me how much I'm just like them.
    • When Edward confronts Shou Tucker over his use of his wife and daughter as subjects in his experiments, Tucker says Edward is just like him, because Edward used alchemy to try to bring his mother back.
  • In Outlaw Star, Harry MacDougal pulls one of these on Melfina, to whom he reveals to her that he's also an Artificial Human, with all the Cloning Blues that go with it.
  • Death Note: Both Light and L fall under this trope, engaging in roughly the same questionable activities in their cat-and-mouse game. For example, they both use criminals to test the power of the Death Note at least once during the story.
    • Matsuda and Light are also Not So Different, as Matsuda admits to having occasionally thought that the world would be a better place if some people weren't in it. Later on, he starts to become seriously worried by how much he sees the world as having improved with Kira around, leading to something of a Get A Hold Of Yourself Man (minus the hitting) moment on the part of the other policemen. Then you have Mello, another detective investigating Kira, whose actions in pursuit of Light are so dreadful that it's hard to say that he's any than his foe.
  • Negima turned to this during the school festival arc. Negi and his group going back in time by ten days to "fix" the future another traveler had created, he reasoned that it was no different than her going backwards to change her own future.
  • The final battle of Zeta Gundam has a couple of speeches along these lines. Played straight in the case of Camille and Jerid, and played rather strangely in the case of Reccoa and Emma. Also, there is a really nice scene in a theater...
  • In the anime version of Pretear Fenrir even says at one point that Himeno is going to repeat her fate — to which Himeno immediately objects. Not only Fenrir actually got her powers from being in the same position as Himeno, she turned evil because of her unrequited love for the same person Himeno is in love with.
  • Astro Boy gets to hear one of these speeches just about every time he tangles with Atlas or Blue Knight. In fact, in Blue Knight's case it actually worked for a while.
  • Late in Code Geass, Jeremiah Gottwald asks Sayoko Shinozaki if it's chivalry (the same code of loyalty that he's tried to live his life by) that makes her remain loyal to Lelouch, despite being Japanese herself, and she agrees that this is probably the reason. Considering they spent the vast majority of the series on opposing sides, and even tried to kill each other the first time they crossed paths, it counts. Of course, both are much beloved Enemble Darkhorses so the idea of them being a pairing soon entered Fanon via Memetic Mutation based ENTIRELY on this small speech.
    • Much more important is the ending: When Lelouch and Nunnally confront one another, Nunnally reveals that she willingly worked with Schneizel in order to focus all the world's hatred on the WMD-flinging space fortress Damocles, so that people could finally unite and move towards peace. As we learn at the final episode's climax, Lelouch had the exact same plan - except that he made himself the object of hatred, and then allowed himself to be killed so humanity as a whole could move on.
  • Naruto and Gaara. Their arc (and their friendship) actually bases on them being Not So Different. This also happens in way too many fillers in the anime, particularly in the Temple of Fire filler with Sora. Not only did they initially start out as outcasts in their respective communities, but Sora even has part of the Nine-Tailed Fox's chakra within him. Also, in the Ultimate Ninja game, if you select Hinata's history mode, when you face Sakura she'll say that Hinata reminds her of how she used to be shy before meeting Ino, fighting you/Hinata for a good challenge, and offer encouragement and comfort if you/Hinata lose..
  • In the climax of Fate Stay Night, the Big Bad (Kotomine) says that he and Shirou's father were much alike. Understandably, Shirou's reaction is "Screw you!"
    • In the non-animated Heaven's Feel route, the comparison comes up again — rather better justified as well — and this time Shirou can't deny it as readily. The climax even has Shirou realize that Shirou himself and Kotomine are Not So Different all on his own — but since their selfish and Not So Different wishes are mutually exclusive, they have to fight.
  • Jail Scaglietti of Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha uses as the basis of his Hannibal Lecture the assertion that Fate's adopting children who would become Child Soldiers that loved her makes her no different from Jail himself or her Evil Matriarch of a mother. Erio and Caro, the children in question, respond with a You Are Not Alone speech about how they're the ones who chose their path and that all Fate did was raise them to be strong-willed enough to do so, which gives Fate the strength to take Jail and his Numbers down in a Crowning Moment Of Awesome.
  • Tetsunosuke and Suzu from Peacemaker Kurogane, although constantly pushing each other's buttons and being rivals, are shown to think to themselves that maybe they're not so different after all. At least until Suzu goes insane and obsessed with Tetsunosuke...
  • A variation: Habashira Rui and Hiruma have a moment in Eyeshield 21 where Habashira asks why their paths are so different when their methods are the same.
  • In One Piece, done inadvertenly by Sanji when fighting Absalom: Not only they have a similar reaction to seeing a sleeping Nami in a wedding dress, but Sanji reveals that given invisibility powers, he would do little better than Absalom himself.
  • Done with a positive intonation in Gaiking Legend of the Daiku Maryu. When Lee actually meets a momentarily-blinded Vestanuu, she pretty much lets him know she fights simply because she and the others of Darius believe that humanity attacked first and they're justified in defending themselves.
  • In Yu Yu Hakusho, Yusuke notices that he's some similarities with his opponent Jin, particularly enjoying fighting and a simlar fighting style, and his acknowledging their similarities is slightly played up in the anime. After dying at Yusuke's hands, Toguro tells Genkai that Yusuke has the potential to become great, but might end up like him if Genkai doesn't make the right decisions.
  • In SD Gundam Force, Sazabi tries this on Captain near the end of their fight, in an attempt to lure him to the dark side. Captain's response?
    Captain: If you want a friend... You'll have to do better than that!
  • Subverted in Code: Breaker when a Chaotic Evil character says she was severely abused because of her powers, and a Chaotic Good character says that he too was abused. They go through a Defeat Means Friendship moment and then Chaotic Evil drops all the people she's frozen into a pit. It seems that Defeat has nothing on treating someone like a human being.
  • Baccano! goes for a not quite good, but not quite bad thing in Drugs and Dominoes, when Eve Genoard finally encounters Luck Gandor, the man who "killed" her brother after he killed three of Luck's friends, entirely unprovoked. Not only does she learn that he's not the Complete Monster she thought he would be but also that, given similar circumstances (namely, learning that Gustavo killed her father and other brother for his own personal gain), she would pretty much do the same without a second thought — the only reason she didn't blow Gustavo's head off then and there was because of Luck's intervention.

Comic Books
  • Xavier and Magneto of X-men...
    • An interesting variant occurs during the "Acts of Vengeance" crossover, where Magneto decides to ignore the stated purpose and kill the Red Skull. Red Skull of course launches into a Not So Different speech, essentially taunting Magneto about the fact that his quest for mutant supremacy is quite similar to the Red Skull's own ideology. In the end Magneto spares his life but seals him inside an underground room filled with food and water.
    • Or Cyclops and Prof. X. After taking charge of the X-Men Scott has begun to keep secrets and make unilateral decisions, the same things that made him kick out Xavier.
  • That he is Not So Different from his greatest enemies, especially the Joker, is repeatedly shown to be one of Batman's greatest fears. It's not an entirely unfounded idea either; he may not be cruel or a murderer, but he's still not the sanest guy.
    • Batman: The Killing Joke has the Joker try to prove this to Batman in his own psychotically twisted way. In the end, after Batman proves that the Joker's biggest point, that everyone was just like him, false, he and Joker share a big metaphorical Not So Different moment, and end the book laughing maniacally together.
    • Mr. Zsasz gave Batman one of these speeches during the Knightfall crossover. His main point was that they both hunted people.
  • Iron Man has been compared to Doctor Doom quite a bit. Especially since his behavior in Civil War.
  • The Punisher gets a lot of these, although he usually just shoots the guy before they get beyond "we're no—".

Film
  • Luke Skywalker of Star Wars gets his Not So Different moment when he cuts off his father's artificial hand. Luke sees that he has just repaid Vader's violence in kind, but also sees his own prosthetic hand as symbolizing the possibility that he's becoming like his father. This was foreshadowed earlier in Empire Strikes Back when Yoda sends Luke into a cave to be attacked by a masked warrior brandishing a lightsaber, looking much like Darth Vader. Luke quickly defeats the warrior, decapitating it. The warrior's mask falls off, and its face is exactly like Luke's. Yoda points out that the cave only contains what you take into it (ie. it shows you yourself, and your weaknesses) in fact telling Luke he won't need his weapons. Luke then goes and completely ignores him.
  • Occurs twice in the Austin Powers trilogy, between Doctor Evil and Austin (who, amusingly enough, are both played by Mike Myers); first in the first film near the end, and later in the third film:
    Doctor Evil: Remember when I said 'We're not so different, you and I'?
    Cuts back to the first film, with Austin aiming his gun at Doctor Evil.
    Doctor Evil: We're not so different, you and I.
    Flashback ends.
    Doctor Evil: See? I did say that.
    Austin: Yes, very nice. Now where's my father?
    • The third film also reveals that Doctor Evil and Austin are twins proving that they are Not So Different in more ways than either believed.
  • Raiders Of The Lost Ark: Rival archaeologist Rene Belloq provides a definitive example of this trope when he taunts the protagonist, Indiana Jones.
    Belloq: You and I are very much alike. Archeology is our religion, yet we have both fallen from the pure faith. Our methods have not differed as much as you pretend. I am but a shadowy reflection of you. It would take only a nudge to make you like me. To push you out of the light.
    Bill Corbitt: The "we're not so different you and me" speech is copyright Ben Gazzara. It cannot be used without the express written consent of Ben Gazzara.
  • Its A Wonderful Life: Corrupt Corporate Executive Mr. Potter takes the opportune moment to throw George Bailey's words back in his face when the hero is facing bankruptcy and jail. Notably, the comparison insults both of them.
    Mr. Potter: Look at you. You used to be so cocky. You were going to go out and conquer the world. You once called me "a warped, frustrated, old man!" What are you but a warped, frustrated young man? A miserable little clerk crawling in here on your hands and knees and begging for help.
  • Inverted in Galaxy Quest, where the villain forces the main character to explain how he's Not So Different from the villain... to an ally who hero-worships the main character.
  • The Man With The Golden Gun. Scaramanga does this with James Bond. Bond tells him that he is full of a certain bodily discharge.
  • The Kingdom is an interesting version, having a Not So Different ending. At the very end of the movie, it is revealed what the hero said in the beginning when whispering a reassurance to another member of his team "We're going to kill them all", referring the Diabolical Mastermind terrorists who executed an attack that killed at least one of their coworkers. Just after this revelation the film cuts to that terrorist's grandson, who heard his last words after the terrorist was fatally shot. Asked by his mother what his grandfather's last words were, the young boy replies that they were "Do not worry, my child. For the day shall come when we kill them all".
  • Spoofed in a deleted scene from Small Soldiers when the protagonist's slightly obnoxious neighbour and his family is being held hostage by sentient toys:
    Phil: You know, we're not so different you and I. I have been accused of being plastic all my life!
  • In Falling Down, an odious Nazi shopkeeper tries to use a Not So Different speech with the insane vigilante protagonist.
    Nick: We're the same, you and me. We're the same, don't you see?
    D-Fens: We are not the same. I'm an American and you're a sick asshole.
  • Reverend Mother in The Trouble With Angels says it's one of the reasons she decided at the last minute not to expel troublemaker Mary: both are strong willed, and Reverend Mother says she can't be less tolerant of Mary than the Church has been of her.
  • An exchange from the 2007 Transformers movie:
    Ironhide: Why are we fighting to save the humans? They are a primitive and violent race.
    Optimus Prime: Were we so different?
  • This is a major theme in Heat, where despite Pacino being a cop and De Niro being a professional thief, the two realize that they're very similar people.

Literature
  • Murtagh does this to Eragon at the end of the second book of The Inheritance Cycle. The only thing Eragon can come up with is along the lines of "I don't have scars on my back
  • Near the end of the Discworld novel Witches Abroad, Granny Weatherwax has a Not So Different moment with her sister, Lily, who has become a Knight Templar "good" witch and the de facto ruler of Genua. Granny expresses aloud the fact that she's felt the same urges to use her powers, but never gave in to them. Earlier, Nanny and Magrat had noticed Lily saying "If you don't have respect, you don't have anything", which is a more grammatically correct version of Granny's Catch Phrase "If you ain't got respect, you ain't got nothing." Granny gives the audience a hint of her potential evil side when Lily states that she was doing a needed duty, and Granny is extremely upset that Lily apparently didn't have any fun being evil.
  • In Good Omens, made quite clear that Heaven and Hell are Not So Different.
  • A Song Of Ice And Fire gives us this gem: "A Knight's a sword with a horse. The rest, the vows and the sacred oils and The Lady's favours, they're silk ribbons tied 'round the sword. Maybe the Sword's prettier with ribbons hanging of it, but it'll kill you just as dead. Well, bugger your ribbons, and shove your swords up your arses. I'm the same as you. The only difference is, I don't lie about what I am. So, kill me, but don't call me a murderer while you stand there telling each other your shit don't stink. You hear me?"
  • An uneasy dynamic between Harry Potter and Big Bad Voldemort, made most explicit in the second book. They have similar appearances (at least with Voldemort's past self), abilities, passions, disregard for rules, and histories. As well, some of Voldemort's power was transferred to Harry at the beginning of the first book, and at the end of the fourth book, Voldemort transfers some of Harry's motherly protection to him.
  • Nearly every Animorphs book explores this theme, with the Animorphs worrying that they are becoming too ruthless, too willing to do anything they have to in order to win their war. And they compare themselves to the Yeerks, who are paragons of ruthlessness. The characters face many morally ambiguous situations, which either dispel or (perhaps more often) confirm these doubts. Some Yeerk characters have made "not so different" arguments to the Animorphs, especially Karen/Aftran, Taylor, and the human villain David.
  • Fevre Dream, Damon Julian saying the "We are not so different" to Abner Marsh. Abner actually agrees with him, but still refuses to Julian's We Can Rule Together.
  • In the later books in A Series of Unfortunate Events, the Baudelaires are almost paralyzed a few times from the idea that by lying and wearing disguises everywhere, they're starting to become like Olaf and his gang. This particularly surfaces in The Grim Grotto, wherein they discover one of the gang - the Hook-Handed Man - is in fact the older brother of one of their newest friends, driven to villainy by his tragic past. He himself explains it:
    "People aren't either wicked or noble," the hook-handed man said. "They're like chef's salad, with good things and bad things chopped and mixed together in a vinaigrette of confusion and conflict."
    • As the Baudelaires slowly became more wary of their 'villainous' deeds over the course of the plot, Olaf and his associates were gradually either killed off or - especially in the case of Olaf himself, in his final moments - found to have a hidden 'human' side. Asked about the subject, the author (Daniel Handler) commented:
      "It's sad, isn't it? I think the Baudelaires are getting older, and one of the sad facts about getting older is that you've always thought of yourself and people you know as righteous and true and the people you dislike as evil. The older you get the more muddy that water becomes."
  • The Big Bad of The Thief of Always tries to pull this on the hero, pointing out that although the Big Bad was a soul-stealing monstrosity, the Hero remorselessly killed the Big Bad's minions, who weren't willfully evil, at least one of whom wasn't hostile, and who were thoroughly convincing and seemingly "real", despite actually being dust given life with illusion. This troper hasn't read the book in a long time, but seems to remember the hero not so much countering it as just idly shrugging it off and continuing trying to take down the Big Bad.
  • R A Salvatore's Drizzt Do'Urden is Not So Different from villain Artemis Entreri. This is actually pointed out by Drizzt's Love Interest Cattie-Brie, and as the series continues Artemis becomes more and more sympathetic; pointing this out to him may be a bad idea, however.
  • Ratha of The Book Of The Named bit and crippled her cub, Thistle-chaser. Years later, Thistle-chaser comes back for revenge against Ratha. A small cub tries to defend her, and Thistle-chaser knocks it out of the way. Ratha tells Thistle-chaser that she is no different than herself, since Thistle-chaser got between her and her true target.
  • Jenny and Julian, from L. J. Smith's "The Forbidden Game" trilogy, could be said to fit this trope. There's a part of the seemingly-timid Jenny which likes danger and challenge, and a part of Julian that is surprisingly different from the others of his 'family,' and seems to long for things that don't fit his projected personality. If brought up in the same place, they might've been uncannily similar people.
  • Zhi Zhong in the Conqueror books occasionally catches himself admiring Genghis Khan's ambition and tactical prowess, comparing his enemy to himself. Jelaudin later ponders on how his father used tactics very similar to Genghis in his own wars.
  • Used as a theme in Neil Gaiman short story A Study In Emerald, which is a crossover between Sherlock Holmes and the Cthulhu Mythos. (And no, I'm not kidding). Here there is a detective who lives on Baker Street and is aided by his housemate/war veteran friend. Said detective investigates crimes, often at the behest of Inspector Lestrade of Scotland Yard. Only at the very end of the story does it become increasingly clear that the detective is in fact Professor James Moriarty, (and that the war veteran is Moriarty's right hand man Colonel Sebastian Moran) while the criminals/rebels being hunted are Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson.
  • In Simon Spurrier's Warhammer 40000 novel Lord of the Night, Mira realizes this about her and Saheel on her own. Indeed, reflecting on how similar their personalities were led her to consider that the Imperium had not treated her well. She still resisted in their climatic confrontation — but not forever. Considering the Imperium, whether this is corrupting her is an open question.

Live Action TV
  • On Andromeda, whenever Dylan does something underhanded to accomplish his goals, a nearby Nietzschean will point out that he "would have made a good Nietzschean".
  • Recurring element of Lex's relationship with his father in Smallville.
  • Done both ways in Gilmore Girls, even though it's an unusual trope for that genre. Paris and Rory move for the first time away from being rivals after a "good" Not So Different moment. Lorelai is occasionally unhinged after experiencing a "bad" Not So Different moment with her controlling mother.
  • The first two appearances of the Daleks in the new Doctor Who series are Chock Full O' Not So Different moments.
    • In "Dalek", Metaltron initially points out that, being the last of their respective races, it and the Doctor are "the same", prompting the obligatory "I'm nothing like you!" response. However, the Doctor does go on to gleefully announce that they are the same, even shouting "Exterminate!" as he tries to kill it. At the end of the episode, it again notes that "You would make a good Dalek," which this time has the usual effect of making the Doctor realize how close he's come to crossing the line.
    • In "The Parting of the Ways", the Emperor Dalek repeatedly taunts the Doctor by describing him as "The Great Exterminator", after the Doctor threatens to use a machine to destroy the Daleks along with all life on Earth.
    • In "Journey's End", Davros notes how the Doctor turns his companions into weapons, and wonders how many have "died in his name" (cue flashback) before proclaiming he has shown the Doctor "himself."
      Davros: I made the Daleks, Doctor. You made this.
  • Parodied in the Red Dwarf episode "Angels and Demons" in which Cat and Rimmer refuse to believe they are like their sandal-wearing-hippie-mystic Good Twins while Lister insists that his Evil Twin is no part of him.
    High Rimmer: philosophy, poetry, music, and study. That is how we spend our time. Trying to expand our minds and unlock our full potential in the service of humankind.
    Rimmer: What a pair of losers!
  • Buffy The Vampire Slayer: This comes up often between Buffy and Faith (and Buffy and Angelus, and Buffy and Dracula for that matter)...
  • ... and between Xena and Callisto, and Xena and Ares as well, of Xena Warrior Princess.
  • The fourth season episode of The 4400 "No exit" shows several of the main characters locked up in the NTAC building, including Jordan Collier and Tom Baldwin. After it is revealed that the lockup is only the result of one of the NTAC agents having an ability due to a previous injection of promicin, and was created as a collective dream in order to promote cooperation between the Collier followers and NTAC, Collier and Baldwin are forced to work together and the ordeal convince both of them that there is common ground between them. However, Baldwin still keeps his stance against Collier and vows to catch him.
  • In one episode of Star Trek Voyager, "Scientific Method", one of the alien scientists using the ship's crew as guinea pigs tells Janeway that they are very similar in their need to protect their people. Needless to say, Janeway disagrees.
  • In American Gothic, one hero (The Chosen One, of sorts) has to tell another (his Spirit Advisor) that she is Not So Different: in "The Plague Sower", having gone too far in her desire for vengeance and justice, Merlyn uses her angelic powers to curse Trinity with an almost Biblical plague, only relenting when she is made to see how her either-or mentality and harsh, murderous methods make her no better than Buck.
  • Dr. Foreman and Dr. House — Foreman eventually quits House's team to save himself from becoming like House, unaware that he already is like him and always has been. In season 4, he proves once and for all that it is irrevocable:
    Cuddy: You’re House Lite now. The only administrator that will touch you is the one who hired House Classic. [indicates self]
  • While they are generally great guys, if a little arrogant and condescending (not to mention having proved useless at stopping their cousins), the Tok'ra of Stargate SG-1 are occasionally accused of not being that different from the Goa'uld. Given that their progenitor was a good Goa'uld it would appear it is possible for Goa'uld to not be inherently evil, and some are far less grandiose and insane than the others. On the other side of things the Tok'ra are different as they take hosts only with permission and live in a symbiosis with those hosts. At least that's the idea. A couple of instances where a Tok'ra took a host unwillingly (although that was possibly a misunderstanding) and even dominated their host and took action without their permission (totally deliberate) suggest there might be some truth to the accusations. Really the Tok'ra are like when a government claims it is introducing extraordinarily harsh measures which 'shall only very rarely be used' in that they still have the potential to Kick The Dog like the Goa'uld and sometimes do so. Despite this the Tok'ra get very upset if someone should make the comparison, as if someone should be able to tell the good snake parasites from the bad ones on sight, even though Goa'uld can fake being in true symbiosis with their hosts as well.
  • In the Stargate Atlantis episode "Common Ground", the newly-introduced Todd comments that Sheppard is more like a Wraith than he thinks, but it's strongly implied that this was meant to be a compliment.
  • Character Development and Backstory have combined to make this the case between Humanity and the Cylons in the new Battlestar Galactica. Many of the Cylons have come to realize they are no better than humanity, and are in fact very human indeed. Humanity had slowly come around to the point where most of the main cast acknowledge the Cylons are people too, though the process on their end is hampered by the Cylons whole killed 20 billion people thing which makes it easier for people to deny the similarities- admittedly, they may have a point.
  • In the 30 Rock episode "Generalissimo," Jack Donaghy confronts a Mexican soap-opera actor who's on-screen evil is biasing Jack's Puerto Rican girlfriend's grandmother against him. The actor, Hector Moreda, looks exactly like him (and is played by none other than Alec Baldwin). As they discuss the fate of El Generalissimo, the swarthy, mustachio'd Hector points out to Jack that "We're not so different, you and I".
  • The Twilight Zone probably had a lot of these considering it aired just after WW 2 and during the Korean War and The Cold War. One featured a WW 2 Pacific Theater Sociopathic Soldier who was eager for Japanese blood, to the disgust of his battle-weary comrades. One of them points out that the enemy is just as sick of battle as they are (if not more so), but it takes the soldier literally becoming a Japanese soldier and having his bloodthirsty words parroted back to him for him to get it.
  • A great example of the "That's why I can beat you" outcome is a scene in Blood Ties where the cornered freaked-out vampire (abandoned by its sire) tells Henry that he too is a monster and Henry answers "But I am the monster who is coming out of this alive."

Music

Video Games
  • Ace Combat Zero makes use of this. "You and I are opposite sides of the same coin..."
  • The ending of Advance Wars: Dual Strike consists primarily of a Not So Different speech by the defeated Big Bad, complete with If You Kill Him You Will Be Just Like Him. The player is then given the choice of how to deal with the defeated and now helpless Big Bad.
  • In Advance Wars 2, Mad Scientist Lash taunts Smart Girl Sonja by accusing Sonja of enjoying warfare just as much as she does.
  • In Mega Man Zero 4, Big Bad Dr. Weil desperately bluffs Zero and tries to convince him that killing Weil would be stooping to his level of villainy. In an unorthodox move, Zero kills him anyway, making note at how he never considered himself a hero to begin with. Notably, Zero loses his life in the process.
  • Done rather sadly in Mega Man 2: The Power Fighters, where Mega Man's solo ending had Dr. Wily pointing out Mega Man's senseless destruction of robots in the act of peace for humans and robots. This puts Mega Man in guilt long enough for Wily to escape by the time he is cheered up by his friends.
  • Inverted in Mega Man Star Force, with Mega Man Geo-Omega (the protagonist, and a good guy) telling Harp Note that he is just like her, in an effort to get her to join forces with him. Not only does it work, but it is actually true as both of them have previously lost a parent.
  • Metal Gear has Big Boss, an antagonist whose ideology of perpetual, honorable warfare lingers on through his unkillable son, Liquid Snake. It all seems the usual completely bonkers nonsense, until you're put into his shoes at the start of the third game and get to see what he went through before he formed the Foxhound unit and started plotting world domination. He suffers through the same betrayals and manipulation that the series protagonist, Solid Snake, has gone through, and at the end is just as alienated and bitter. It leaves potent, unstated message about how someone's past experiences don't control their future.
    • A clearer example is towards the end of the first Metal Gear Solid. Liquid is talking about bringing about his father's vision of a return to warfare. When Snake claims that he doesn't want that kind of a world, Liquid's response is a CMOA (and is probably directed towards the player as well as Snake).
    Liquid: So why are you here then? Why do you continue to follow your orders while you superiors betray you? Why did you come here?
    Snake: ...
    Liquid: Well... I'll tell you then. You enjoy all the killing, that's why.
  • The original Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic when Malak reveals that you are Darth Revan.
  • In Assassins Creed, mad executioner Majd Uddin attempts to pull this on Altair, explaining that they aren't so different and that he would have done the same were he in Uddin's position. Altair's response? Stab Uddin in the neck.
  • Portal: "The difference between you and me is that I can feel pain..."
  • Hudson Soft attempted to market Bomberman Act: Zero on their website with this in mind, saying the classic Bomberman gameplay is still there and intact despite its Darker And Edgier exterior (due to how this Wiki is designed, we can't directly link you to the articles with this in effect; just go to Hudson's official website, head to their Bomberman Supersite, and read the two articles at the bottom), before accepting the fact that They Changed It Now It Sucks.
  • In Oni, at the end of the Rooftops sequence's ninja bossfight, the main character exclaims that she has nothing in common with him - then breaks his neck with her boot.
  • Sly Cooper has this exchange right before the boss fight with Panda King:
    Panda King: Why should you care if I bury a few worthless villages in snow? You are a thief, just like me.
    Sly: No that's only half true. I am a thief- from a long line of master thieves. While you... You're just a frustrated fireworks artist turned homicidal pyromaniac.
  • He needs to sneak around lest he get shredded, and punishes enemies who let him get behind them. Now which Team Fortress 2 class are we talking about, the Spy or the Pyro with Backburner?
  • In The Suffering, Horace compares himself to the protagonist Torque in several scenes, though he often encourages him against becoming too much like him:
    You had a wife, right? Didja love her? How far would you go to make sure she stayed yours? When you get mad, you feel you could kill a man, rip him apart with your bare hands. You ever feel that way? Maybe you're not like me, it's hard to say. Ya gotta fight it. Don't let this place do to you what it did to me.

Web Comics

Western Animation
  • Family Guy: Stewie realizes he's not so different from one of his "potential siblings" when one of them mentions that he too hates Lois.
  • American Dad: Subverted in "Weiner of Our Discontent" when Roger and Stan find that they both like to feel important:
    Roger: We're not so different, you and I.
    Stan: Yes we are. We're night and day. Except for in this specific instance.
    • Also Stan belittles Steve for being nerdy and unpopular flashbacks reveal that he was just as nerdy and even more unpopular.
  • Avatar The Last Airbender: Parallel plots frequently point out that the hero, Aang, and Worthy Opponent, Prince Zuko, are not so different, but any stress spent over the situation pre-Heel Face Turn was on the dark Anti Villain prince's part, not the hero's. Zuko and Sokka also get their Not So Different episode in "The Boiling Rock."
  • In the finale of the second season of Justice League Unlimited, the heroes face Alternate Universe Evil Twins of themselves. Superman's evil twin taunts him as being Not So Different from him: "Power corrupts, after all, and who has more power than Superman?" This is followed by Superman following the trope exactly by shouting: "I'm not like you! I'm nothing like you!"
  • Vlad Plasmius, being Danny Phantom's Evil Counterpart, loves messing with him this way:
    Plasmius: Sneak attack — very good, Daniel. You're getting more like me with every battle.
    Danny: I am NOTHING like you!
    Plasmius: Oh, you're not? Using your powers to get back at people you don't like? Throwing the first punch? You're more like me than you know.
  • Ben 10 and Kevin 11. While the former type was pleasantly averted in their Forced Prize Fight episode, the latter type started from Kevin's first appearance:
    Ben: (under his breath) You don't care about anyone but yourself.
    Kevin: You talking about me?
    Ben: No. I'm talking about me!
  • Kim and Shego of Kim Possible after the events of "Stop Team Go."
  • Teen Titans likes this a lot.
    • Slade is obsessively fond of doing this to Robin. because he wants to make Robin his apprentice sidekick lover son. It always makes Robin go into a frenzy of rage, which is always fun for Slade, who just clearly enjoys messing with his head. This was the premise of the "Apprentice" episodes. Robin ponders near the end, "Focused, serious, determined...as much as I hate to admit it, he and I are kind of alike. But there's one big difference between me and Slade — He doesn't have any friends." Slade even manages to do this when he's dead in "Haunted" by making Robin act crazy and violent through drugs. He later taunts him by referring to them as "friends" when they team up in "The End".("I'm NOT your friend!") (Because he doesn't have any, remember?) Of course, Deathstroke Slade is not all that different from Robin's mentor Batman.
    • Trigon also does this to Raven, calling her "daddy's little girl," with the double whammy of Because Destiny Says So.
    • Brother Blood tries to do this to Cyborg, but it's not as effective as with Robin, because Cyborg is marginally sane. In fact, it's Brother Blood who takes this the most seriously, to the point that he makes himself into a cyborg to prove his point.
  • In The Batman, villains try this on Batman with increasing frequency as the series goes on. To his credit (and the misfortune of said villains), Batman proves quite capable of rationally explaining the key differences while he beats the snot out of them.
  • In Mighty Max, Norman confronts the semi-immortal that slaughtered his village centuries ago. Norman eventually defeats him and has him held over an effectively bottomless chasm when the villain, having a moment of Genre Savvy, triumphantly invokes this trope with the standard declaration of "If you kill me, you'll be just like me!" Norman just looks at him for a moment, before calmly stating "I can live with that" and dropping him. Aversion from the typical in that Norman never evinces a single bit of guilt over doing so, but then, he was never exactly the touchy-feely hero type in the first place.
  • In an episode of The Venture Brothers, the Mighty Monarch deliberately invokes this trope, convincing the extremely naive Dean Venture that, if he reports the Monarch's actions, telling will make Dean JUST LIKE HIM!
  • In Fairly Odd Parents with Remy and Crocker. Timmy has did Crocker's fairy spaz when he went back in time.
    Timmy: Fairy Godparents!!!
    Cosmo and Wanda: (smack and hit him)
    Timmy: Thanks for not using the oar.
    • When Timmy met Remy, Remy asked for him to wish his fairies away. Timmy said "You know what stinks about you, Remy? You're rich, you got godparents and you're still miserable. I know, at least, that I'm happier than you, Remy." Later, he says:
      Wanda: What's wrong, Timmy?
      Timmy: (as a dragon) I fell sorry for Remy. I wish I could help him.
      Wanda: We can do that.
      Timmy: (as a dragon) I wish Remy could spend more time with his parents.
    • Also, Norm the Genie did it really subtly in 'Genie Meanie Menie Moe':
      Norm: I hate being out-jerked
    • The Not So Different is in the choice of words. He chose to say 'out-jerked' instead of outwitted or something like that, which meant he acknowledged both he and Timmy were Jerkasses.
  • The Dark Lord Chuckles the Silly Piggy tries this against Dave The Barbarian, who counters with "No we aren't!" He has to agree. "What was I thinking?!"
  • Lex Luthor in Justice League Unlimited proves himself a Genre Savvy thorn in the League's side by constantly pointing out in the in-universe media how his apparent attempts at reformation are not so different from the more Easily Forgiven exploits of League members: After all... Superman had been brainwashed by Darkseid into leading war on Metropolis, and Hawkgirl betrayed the entire planet to the Thannagarians... Why doesn't Lex deserve a second chance?

Toys
  • When Toa Matoro from Bionicle found himself forced to team up with Big Bad Makuta, Makuta was amused at the way Matoro got out of a certain situation: After using his Mask of Reanimation to use sea creature corpses to fight off Pridak's army of sharks, he was convinced he should have thrown away the mask and never used it. Makuta's response?
    Makuta: Why so quiet? We have seen death and destruction today with the promise of much more to come. We have seen heroes behaving like villains. You yourself have done things even I would be reluctant to do. It is a time for celebration.
    Matoro: Shut up! I'm doing only what I have to do to save the life of Mata Nui, a life you put in jeopardy.
    Makuta: Think what you like, little Toa, and try to avoid admitting to yourself that you are one bad day, one moment of cruelty, one fit of rage away from being me.
Not Quite The Right Thing
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