[[quoteright:200:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/NobodyPoops_7809.jpg]]

->''"Well, I feel that films -- the film industry -- has increasingly failed to reflect reality as people live it. No-one goes for a piss in ''Franchise/StarWars'', you can watch the whole of ''Film/{{Ghostbusters}}'' and no-one brushes their teeth, and in ''Film/LostInTranslation'', nothing happens. At all."''
-->-- ''Series/ThatMitchellAndWebbLook''

You know that children's book, ''Everyone Poops''? Well, they lied. Not everyone does.

Sure, real people and animals in everyday life might, but you're not likely to see a fictional character going to the bathroom. This would detract from the plotline, and besides, nobody really wants to see that sort of thing. [[ConservationOfDetail If something's not crucial to the story, why include it?]]

(Sometimes, of course, it ''is'' crucial to the story, and this trope is averted. Maybe there's a PottyEmergency; maybe someone [[BathroomBreakout uses a bathroom break to escape custody]]; maybe someone suffers an UndignifiedDeath by being [[CampingACrapper killed on the toilet]] -- or worse, [[TheCanKickedHim killed ]]''[[TheCanKickedHim with ]]''[[TheCanKickedHim a toilet]]; or maybe there's just some good old-fashioned ToiletHumour. Or maybe it ''isn't'' crucial to the story [[NarrativeFiligree but is included anyway]].)

This trope is sometimes averted without showing anything by simply having a character [[CallingYourBathroomBreaks excusing themselves for a moment.]] Creatures with AHeadAtEachEnd beg the question of whether this trope ''literally'' applies.

'''The page lists [[LampshadeHanging lampshades]] of the phenomenon'''; straight examples and aversions are too many to count.

Even the dead aren't immune to this trope, as evidenced in the subtrope NoDeadBodyPoops.
----
!!Lampshades:

[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder:Advertising]]
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ghItAFUMQgI "I got the bathroom bowl blues!"]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Anime and Manga]]
* In ''Manga/{{Naruto}}'', it is explicitly stated that [[spoiler: White Zetsu]], being part-plant clone ''things'', do not poop. They're actually rather curious about it, to the point of one asking somebody who until recently did have to poop what it felt like.
* In the midst of its ToiletHumour, ''Manga/CityHunter'' has a magnificent scene that causes Kaori to complain that nobody had ever heard of a hero that goes to poop before the battle, only for Ryo to reply that it's the smart thing to do (and calling her constipated).
* In ''SuperDreadnoughtGirl4946'', the titular [[CuteGiant giant girl]] is asked about how she goes to the toilet. She responds that she doesn't leading to a discussion on the topic since no one believes her. Later we learn that since her size is [[AWizardDidIt supernatural in origin]], she doesn't require food to live and thus doesn't poop either.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* A ''Wizard'' special focusing on ''Franchise/{{Batman}}'' had one questioning if the Batcave has any bathrooms or if Bruce has to run back up to Wayne Manor for a bathroom break.
* Averted in ''ComicBook/{{Diabolik}}'', where people do, sometimes, take a bathroom break. In fact, the start of Natasha Morgan's DyingMomentOfAwesome ''was'' asking her kidnappers for a bathroom break... To be with only one of them just long enough to kill him and do everything else she had in mind.
* Averted in one issue of ''ComicBook/GenThirteen'', where the girls go to the restroom and discuss what a pain in the ass it is to have a full-body costume when you have to pee.
* Averted in an issue of ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}'', where, after a long adventure, Karolina runs off to the bushes, saying that she's needed to pee for about a century.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Fan Fiction]]
* {{Justified|Trope}} and {{Invoked|Trope}} in ''FanFic/FriendshipIsOptimal'', as when people [[BrainUploading emigrate to Equestria]], Celest-A.I. eliminates the need to do so, along with removing other tedious biological functions. Ones that people enjoy such as eating are still kept however, unless a person also wants them removed.
* In the ''Fanfic/ProjectDarkJade'' fanfic ''Fanfic/QueenOfShadows'', Shadowkhan apparently don't need to use the restroom.
* Averted in ''FanFic/{{Shatterheart}}'', it's offhandedly mentioned the only reason Syaoran left his room when he was a shut-in was to go to the bathroom. Later, one of the immediate problems of Syaoran's torture injuries is the increasing difficulty of using the bathroom since he could not walk or stand.
* Averted from time to time in ''FanFic/WhatLiesBeyondTheWalls'', where characters are sometimes mentioned urinating or defecating casually.
* Snape lampshades this in ''FanFic/ALittleLightReading'' as he notes that "the book hasn't mentioned so much as a bathroom break."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Film]]
* ''Film/{{Pleasantville}}'' makes a point of this -- Jennifer enters the bathroom to discover that there are no toilets, because they aren't necessary.
* There was some LampshadeHanging in a deleted scene from ''Film/GalaxyQuest'', where one of the Thermians mentions to Creator/AlanRickman's character that Earth's "historical documents" (television programs) did not contain any information regarding waste facilities on the ship and "we extrapolated based on your anatomy" -- revealing what looked to be the most horrendously painful toilet ever created.
* Averted in ''Film/TheLegendOfBoggyCreek''. One of the biggest scares of the movie involves a character making a bathroom break. Likewise, one of the professor's stories in ''Film/BoggyCreek2TheLegendContinues'' is set at a creature's attack on an outhouse. And BrainBleach might be required.
* Much like the ''Series/LeaveItToBeaver'' scene below, the film ''Film/{{Psycho}}'', was the first American movie to show a toilet, implying people have to use it. This was SeriousBusiness at the time, no pun intended.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Literature]]
* Actress [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tamzin_Merchant Tamzin Merchant]] wrote a hilarious poem discussing this, called [[http://www.platformsmagazine.com/1/contents/toilet.htm "Ode to a Toilet".]]
* Lampshaded in ''The Second {{Literature/Foundation}}'', where a girl sneaks aboard a ship and hides there, like she read and saw a lot in popular culture. Then she realizes that the books failed to mention some things, and she cannot remain in her hiding place for long...
* [[LampshadeHanging Lampshaded]] in Donaya Haymond's ''Literature/LegendsOfLaconia'' series. In ''Waking Echoes'', the prison cell Ty spends three days in has a toilet, and in ''Bite Me'' Matthew asks Dianne if her [[OurVampiresAreDifferent father]] goes to the bathroom, saying he's always wondered about those in his [[UnusualEuphemism condition]].
* One of the later ''Literature/SixteenThirtyTwo'' books -- ''1635: The Eastern Front'' -- includes a scene where a radio transmission was delayed because one of General Stearns's staff colonels was "taking care of urgent business."
-->'''Long:''' If it's urgent business, he may be occupied for a while yet.\\
'''Stearns:''' He should be finishing up any second now. [[LampshadeHanging It's the sort of pressing business that never makes its way into fiction.]]
* Lampshaded in the KevinBrooks novel ''Lucas'' - while waiting for the antagonists to walk past, so she can stalk them, Cait realises that she really needs to pee, and she decides to go in some nearby tall grass...[[spoiler:only for the antagonists to find her when she's still got her pants down]]. She muses in her narration that you never see anyone got to the toilet in films, and if you do, it's only because something dramatic is going to happen when they're in the toilet - being attacked by an enemy, for example.
* Lampshaded in ''Literature/TheNeverEndingStory''. Bastian has to [[UnusualEuphemism deliver a fax]], and wonders why the characters in the books never seem to have that need. [[CantGetAwayWithNuthin He got detention for pointing that out in class]]. (Specifically, he had asked his teacher if Jesus ever had to poop.)
* In the ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'' novel ''Discworld/{{Snuff}}'', it's [[ConversationalTroping conversed]] when a little boy whose favourite book so far has been ''The World Of Poo'' "was beginning, with encouragement, to read books in which nobody had a bowel movement at all. Which, when you came to think about it, was a mystery all by itself."
* The StephenKing short story "Umney's Last Case" features a distraught author trying to muscle out his most famous creation so that he can enter the world of fiction and live without pain. He succeeds, and while the character is getting used to the real world, he wets himself because he's never actually ''had'' to use the bathroom before.
** Averted in "Secret Window, Secret Garden" (''Literature/FourPastMidnight''). Mort Rainey poops.
* Creator/DaveBarry once mused that Batman never goes to the bathroom. "Maybe that's why he's always grimacing."
* Possibly averted in ''Literature/TheWishingMaiden'' - there's a brief mention of Jacquotte needing to vacate her bladder, after a lot of traveling, and [[spoiler:the smell at the bottom of the well, where she finds Asha, might indicate that this trope was pointedly avoided.]]
* Averted in ''Literature/{{Wool}}'', where the lone survivor in a fallout shelter designed for hundreds of thousands of people spends ''thirty-four years'' systematically crapping his way through toilet after toilet [[{{Squick}} that doesn't flush]].
* In ''Literature/WordsOfRadiance'' (second book of ''Literature/TheStormlightArchive''), Shallan derails Adolin's account of bravely leaping into battle while hugely outnumbered by asking how he goes to the bathroom while wearing Shardplate. After [[DelayedReaction continuing for a line or two]], he comments that he's told that story a number of times and no one had ever asked anything like that before. He acknowledges that there are often breaks in battle where they have someone to help, but yes, on three occasions he's done it straight in his armor. He doesn't try to regale her with tales of daring-do again.

[[/folder]]

[[folder: Live Action TV]]
* One scene in the pilot episode of ''Series/LeaveItToBeaver'' had to be reshot when [[MoralGuardians standards and practices]] noticed [[FreezeFrameBonus a toilet tank in the corner of a shot.]]
* In ''Series/HannahMontana'', when best friend Lilly Truscott is forced by Miley to go to the toilet, so that Miley can talk to a boy she likes. This is [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] when she gets back, after much drama has unfolded with Miley, when Lilly mentions how all the good stuff happens when people go to the toilet.
* Whedon was careful to show a toilet on ''Series/{{Firefly}}''. The first shot on the show inside a crewman's quarters was Mal buttoning up and kicking the toilet back into its resting place.
* Averted with ''Series/InTheFlesh'' with an unpleasant overlap with NoDeadBodyPoops to boot. Zombie Amy cheerfully talks about what happened when she tried to eat, much to the discomfort of Kieran's family. New clothing was required, apparently.
* Bridget Hennessey tries to invoke this trope around herself in ''Series/EightSimpleRules''. She apparently sustains an illusion of never having to use the bathroom.
* Averted in ''Series/BabylonFive'': At least one scene takes place in a public toilet which caters for ''multiple species''.
* Averted in ''Series/StargateSG1'': In "Ascension", Jack breaks off a conversation with Sam because he has to pee, and hurries through a suitably marked door.
* One scene in episode seven of ''Series/{{Vikings}}'' Ragnar Lothbrok is seen standing up from behind some bushes whilst talking to his comrades.
* The very first scare in ''Series/PennyDreadful'' is when an unseen menace snatches up a woman in the London slums and drags her out a window. She was using the indoor privy at the time.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:New Media]]
* In ''Blog/{{Alice and Bob}}'', this trope is lampshaded:
-->"Surprisingly, nobody really seems to have to take a dump in fiction. Like, I used to play ''[[VideoGame/DwarfFortress Elf Forest]]'', which was overly realistic. You could pretty much do anything '''but''' relieve bodily wastes. The only game I recall in which you can do that is ''[[VideoGame/TheSims Simmy Buddies]]'' which I think had that toilet meter.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Radio]]
* Lampshaded in the new radio series of ''Radio/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy''. The teleportation devices in Slartibartfast's [[ItRunsOnNonsensoleum Bistromatic Ship]] are in the bathroom cubicles. Just before they set off, Arthur says "You know, in all this time, I have never once [[SoundEffectBleep *flush* ]]."
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Tabletop Games]]
* Especially in earlier days and editions of ''TabletopGame/DungeonsAndDragons'', when the game's focus was more on world simulation and the detailed logistics of adventuring (counting arrows and torches, keeping track of food and water, deciding who should carry what loot...) were emphasized more, advice on dungeon design would almost inevitably manage to squeeze in a bit about not forgetting that any place inhabited by intelligent living creatures had better include toilets of ''some'' sort.
* ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer 40000}}'': While latrine duty is still a part of the Imperial Guard and Space Marines have TwentyFourHourArmor, it's only referred to in passing, with other factions not mentioning this at all (fortunately so in the case of Nurglites). Zigzagged with the Orks: Literature/CiaphasCain mentions Orks answer the call of nature whenever it happens, and only building designated facilities to insult and deface whatever was there before, ComicBook/DeffSkwadron shows that they're part of the squig feeding process.
** [[http://1d4chan.org/wiki/The_Toilets_of_the_41st_Millennium Fandom to the rescue.]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Video Games]]
* This is true for pretty much any video game. While toilets may be present in the game world, your character can run, shoot, and kick ass for hours or days at a time, without eating, drinking, resting or taking a piss/shit.
* Lampshaded in ''VisualNovel/PhoenixWrightAceAttorney: Trials And Tribulations'': Phoenix believes that his "[[BitchInSheepsClothing Perfect Little Dollie]]" doesn't have such disgusting bodily functions.
* ''VideoGame/TheTrailOfAnguish'' informs you, "You don't need to use the bathroom right now. It's an adventure game, after all."
* ''VideoGame/EarthBound'' lampshades the aversion to the trope. They have bathrooms in the game, but they all are occupied or otherwise unusable. In the first bathroom you come to, walking towards the door will result in a cutscene where one guy rushes in ahead of you. Attempting to enter will make him say: "Occupied!"
* In ''JimmyNeutron vs. Jimmy Negatron'', you can at one point make Jimmy go into a bathroom, which triggers a cutscene of him walking out and thanking the player for thinking of it, because he hadn't gone all day.
* In ''VideoGame/NoMoreHeroes'', Travis uses the toilet to save. [[spoiler:One assassin at the end of the game is even GenreSavvy enough to [[CampingACrapper attack him as he's saving]], so to speak.]]
* In ''{{Agatha Christie}}'s Evil Under the Sun'' clicking on a toilet results in Poirot saying "Although I am sure the sight would amuse you Hastings, I will not indulge in that activity for the duration of this tale."
* ''VideoGame/RuneScape'' eventually made a RunningGag of the lack of bodily waste-- Ali the Bartender mentions that there are no toilets in Runescape, Ava the scientist mentions that adventurers lack many bodily functions, one April Fool's update proposed outhouses for when the player's had enough tea, and even in the spooky haunted mansion of "Broken Home", you find bathrooms with elaborate tubs and sinks... and a conspicuous empty space anywhere a toilet would go.
* ''VideoGame/BlackAndWhite's'' treatment of this trope is too weird not to mention. The Creature starts out needing to poop like any animal, but if you slap it enough times when it does it, it somehow learns not to poop. The biological need just magically goes away permanently without any side effects. Now if only that worked on humans...
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Web Animation]]
* A running gag in the ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' AbridgedSeries ''WebAnimation/ProjectVoicebend'' is that there are no bathrooms in Republic City, and the citizens somehow don't need to use them.
* In YuGiOh! the Abridged Series, Anzu comments in episode 3 while on the ship that she 'needs the bathroom, but the woman dubbing me won't say so'. This is a callback to the fact that 4Kids edited out Anzu saying she needed the bathroom on this line in the English language dub.
[[/folder]]

[[folder:Webcomics]]
* [[LampshadeHanging Lampshade-hung]] in ''Webcomic/{{Goblins}}'', where [[http://www.goblinscomic.com/01202007/ a guard tells a tale of how an adventurer was given roleplaying XP for... taking a crap, which also triggered a level-up]].
* Pip in ''Webcomic/SequentialArt'' has an interesting [[http://www.collectedcurios.com/sequentialart.php?s=751 biological theory]] of the ''Franchise/MyLittlePony'' world.
** Eventually disproved by [[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic the show itself]], in which at [[http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Recap/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagicS2E14TheLastRoundup one point]] Pinkie ''[[PottyEmergency really]]'' needs a bathroom.
* ''Webcomic/SaturdayMorningBreakfastCereal'' [[http://www.smbc-comics.com/?id=3402#comic strip 3402]] is about a weird [[JustifiedTrope justification]] for the trope after it's been lampshaded:
--> '''Batman''': "My urethra is catheterized. I am constantly emitting a fine mist of urine."
* ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}'': [[http://xkcd.com/1464/ "Santa"]] has the characters wondering aloud how Santa goes to the bathroom when he's delivering presents.
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Western Animation]]
* ''WesternAnimation/{{CatDog}}''. Kind of self-explanatory.
** Except they do in fact poop. Now as for HOW...
* Never happens in the LooneyTunes universe. At least in the originals cartoons. In BabyLooneyTunes, it was a little different.
* Lampshaded in ''WesternAnimation/TheClevelandShow'' by two viewers outside of the 4th wall.
* The title characters of ''WesternAnimation/RenAndStimpy'' are occasionally seen sitting on the toilet, and from time to time the mother of the boy whose house they were staying at would inform them that "Cartoon characters don't need to use the bathroom!"
* Nobody poops in the world of Dr. Seuss. They [[HalloweenIsGrinchNight "go to the euphemism".]]
* Zig-zagged in ''WesternAnimation/MagicAdventuresOfMumfie'': The characters don't need the toilet after eating or drinking, and Mumfie doesn't wear underwear (WordOfGod said that having him do so would result in PeopleSitOnChairs). However, it's averted twice-when Fluffy the cloud leaks on Scarecrow's chair, and whenever Scarecrow falls, he [[BowelBreakingBricks poops straw]].
* Parodied and lampshaded in one episode of ''WesternAnimation/{{Sixteen}}'' where Jonesey walks in on Nikki in the bathroom. It's explained to him that now he's aware that women are "just as gross" as men and will never be attracted to them the same way again.
[[/folder]]
----