[[quoteright:224:[[Webcomic/{{XKCD}} http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/swimsuit_issue_224x250_9263.jpg]]]]

->'''Reporter''': How can you justify destroying a seven million dollar mini-mall, to rescue a girl whose ransom was only twenty-five thousand dollars?
->'''Rescued girl''': Fuck ''you'', lady!
->'''John Spartan''': ''*laughs*'' Good answer.
-->-- ''Film/DemolitionMan''

Isn't it cute when a kid knows more than [[ChildrenAreInnocent you'd think]]? Isn't it even cuter when they know more than you'd think about something that [[TroublingUnchildlikeBehavior you'd prefer no kid knew at all]]? Especially if the kid is too young to be in the CompetenceZone. It's a pretty sure-fire way to get a laugh, especially if adults have spent the whole episode trying to keep the kid from finding something out, and the kid knew it all along.

To anyone young enough to understand or who can remember what it was like to be young, it's funny because the child shows a complete disregard for the unsaid treaty between children and adults: Kids can learn things as long as they pretend they haven't and don't ever mention it. It works on numerous levels.

This trope often isn't exploited in full in live action media, because if a child actor actually says the ''darndest'' things, the MoralGuardians will complain. Instead, they say mildly darnded things. Other media will exploit this more fully.

See also TheTalk. For a more general example of kids talking outside of their expected age range, see LittleProfessorDialog. If the kid is performing a song they know that wasn't... written for a kid to sing, then it's AgeInappropriateArt. SubTrope of TroublingUnchildlikeBehavior.



* Quaker Chewy Granola Bars used to be advertised as being able to stop children from saying the darndest things. One of their ads had a little boy walking up to a bride and informing her that his mother can't believe that she (the bride) wore white.
* A popular Norwegian advertisement shows a mother awkwardly trying to explain to her son that his goldfish, Doffen, is [[ReleasedToElsewhere tired and needs a vacation]]. Cue the boy's sister showing up asking what's going on, the boy casually remarks "Doffen has died" and leaves the room.
* An ad shows a child meeting his dad's boss, and after a moment saying "Daddy, [[LiteralAssKissing his nose]] [[EntendreFailure isn't brown]]."
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0GuBdvA7Qus This]] Volkswagen advert.

[[folder:Anime and Manga]]
* Much of the jokes in ''Manga/CrayonShinChan'' are of this type. Though mostly in the [[GagDub American dub]]. In the original dubs, all kids but Shin-chan (And a bit of Nene, the preschool equivalent of a CovertPervert) are perfectly innocent, and (especially in the manga) it's hinted that Shin-chan doesn't know what he's talking about most of the time.
* Kirimi Nekozawa from ''Manga/OuranHighSchoolHostClub''. For some reason, her minders decided to read her shoujo manga, which leads her to say things like "There's debauchery going on here, isn't there?" In the manga (and the English dub), [[http://youtu.be/btnOadpMclA she goes so far as to call the Host Club a "reverse harem."]]
* The ''Franchise/MagicalGirlLyricalNanoha'' ''Lyrical Almanac'' GagSeries in Megami Magazine uses this for a punchline [[http://img408.imageshack.us/img408/371/lyricalmegami17.jpg in one comic]] as Vivio somehow misinterprets her Fate-mama's having her own place to return to as, well...
--> '''Vivio:''' Wait, does that mean Fate-mama... is a '''gigolo'''? \\
'''Fate:''' What!? No!
* The backstory for ''Anime/MobileSuitGundamWing''[='s=] Duo Maxwell gives him a non-swearing example of this. During a conversation with the priest and nun who raised him, he says he doesn't believe in God, but he does believe in [[{{Shinigami}} the God of Death]], because as he puts it, "I've never seen any miracles, but I've seen lots and lots of dead people!" The nun admonishes him gently, but the priest laughs and admits the boy has a point.
* A regular source of humor in the GagDub of ''Anime/GhostStories''.
* Zig-zagged with the Nyan-Nyans from ''Manga/FushigiYuugi''. Yes, they are {{Physical Goddess}}es and ReallySevenHundredYearsOld, but for the major part of the series they look like little girls no older than 10 ''and'' have the mentality of such. [[RunningGag But then they open their mouths...]]
-->'''Nyan Nyan:'''''[to Nuriko, as her sisters heal Miaka, Tamahome and Hotohori]'' Let me heal you!
-->'''Nuriko:''' Thank you, but I'm not hurt...
-->'''Nyan Nyan:''' I'll heal your perversion!
-->'''Nuriko:''' ''[punches the offending Nyanyan into the stratosphere]''
-->'''Nyan Nyan:''' ''Ai yaaaaah!!!''
* ''Anime/Persona4TheAnimation'':
** Right after the school festival, Nanako gives us this gem, courtesy of the festival's fortune teller [[spoiler: who is really [[PowersThatBe Margaret]]]].
--->'''Nanako:''' Man whore! She said you're one big man whore!
** And later in that same episode, the boys are caught "peeping" on the girls during the hot springs episode.
--->'''Nanako:''' Big bro... are you and [[TeamPet Teddie]]... horny?
* In episode 5 of season 2's ''Manga/YuruYuri'', while waiting for Himawari, Sakurako makes another ACupAngst joke about her. Kaede, Himarwari's kid sister, arrives at the front door, and asks if she hates boobs. Sakurako says she doesn't, and then Kaede innocently says she'll share her boobs with Sakurako. Later, she brings some milk for her in an attempt to increase her bust size. Sakurako holds back hitting her since she doesn't know any better.
* In episode 10 of ''Manga/BokuraWaMinnaKawaisou'', Chinatsu tells Ritsu she should go out on a date with Usa. This causes the latter to suffer a ColorFailure, and both Shirosaki and Mayumi are shocked by what the 9 year old is saying. Ritsu, being completely ObliviousToLove, vehemently denies having any feelings for him, and claims he's not interested in her, when in reality, [[EveryoneCanSeeIt everyone knows he likes her]]. Made worse when Ritsu accidentally mentions Hayashi, his female friend from middle school, going to the restaurant a lot, prompting Chinatsu to mention Ritsu is [[ClingyJealousGirl jealous]] of that other girl.
* This is what constantly gets [[Anime/OruchubanEbichu Ebichu]] in trouble: she doesn't know everything about human sexuality, but she knows far more than is safe for anyone who is otherwise a complete child -- as evidenced by the repeated scenes of her bursting in on her mistress and her mistress's boyfriend in the middle of sex, screaming about how they're doing it wrong ("If you're enjoying it so much, why do you keep saying 'No' and 'Stop'?!" or "That's the wrong hole, stupid!").
* When Anzu coaches her ''Manga/HanamaruKindergarten'' classmate Koume in confessing to a boy, it results in Koume screaming "Take me!" As Anzu explains to her shocked teacher, "that's how my Mama confessed to Papa."

[[folder:Comic Books]]
* Subverted in ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}'' with CuteBruiser Molly, twice:
** In the very first story arc, Karolina drags Molly out of the room just as the Runaways are about to witness their parents making a human sacrifice. Later, when they are discussing it, she solemnly tells them that she knows ''exactly'' what they're talking about: [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything S-E-X]].
** In the [[TimeTravel 1907]] arc, when child bride Klara explains about her "marital duties," Karolina looks horrified and Molly says, "He makes you do ''chores''?" Karolina then looks vaguely relieved that the idea of sex as marital duty has not yet reached Molly's precocious consciousness. But in the next issue Molly tells Klara that "It's not even a sin, it's ''illegal''. There's [[Series/LawAndOrderSpecialVictimsUnit TV shows]] [[Series/{{Dateline}} where they catch guys even..."]] It's been previously established that Molly's apparent naivete is a pretense she keeps up so that others will keep their guard down around her. In this case, she may even have been trying to break the tension.
** Used brutally when she was kidnapped by [[spoiler: a time traveling Geoffry Wilder trying to avenge his deceased son Alex]] who manages to call her out on her use of her young age as disarming mechanism and tells her to drop the act. She glares. And then she tells the the man [[spoiler: "Alex turned out just like you. He was a complete failure."]] Damn... just damn...
* In ''ComicBook/DemonKnights'', a young girl thanking Exoristos for saving the village from dragons adds "[[BreastPlate But you dress like a tart]]."
* The six-year-old protagonist of ''ComicBook/{{Squee}}'' objects when his classmate Pepito invites him to dinner:
-->'''Todd''': No, Daddy! [[BigNo No!!]] He's weird and scary! And I don't like him! [[BreadEggsMilkSquick And he's]] [[TheAntichrist the son of Satan!!]]
-->'''Father''': Your mother and I already made plans to go out, so, like it or not, you're going. [[HilariouslyAbusiveChildhood I'm hoping they try to keep you.]]
-->'''[[DeadpanSnarker Caption]]''': This warm moment is brought to you by [[BlackComedy unplanned parenthood]].
* ''ComicBook/JourneyIntoMystery'' combines this with an ExpospeakGag from Kid Loki, who has bought a smartphone and discovered the Internet. (He's a reincarnation of, well, Loki, but he has the memories of a child and looks about ten... and being a devious little ChildProdigy godling he's an excellent source of this trope.)
-->'''Loki''': [[TheInternetIsForPorn I've primarily discovered that mortals like to rut and chronicle the experience pictorially.]]

[[folder:Fan Works]]
* In ''Fanfic/AllYouNeedIsLove'' four-year-old [[OriginalCharacter Duck]] [[AdorablyPrecociousChild Sherlock]] [[EnfantTerrible Penber]] shares with his mother the following observation about [[Manga/DeathNote Mello]]:
-->'''Duck:''' Look, mommy, [[PaintedOnPants his pants are tighter than yours!]]
* In Scootaloo's first appearance in the ''Blog/AskSeriousRainbow'' blog, Serious had been about to insult her stepmother but [[CurseCutShort cut her curse short]] when Scootaloo came in. Scootaloo, finding out the topic was her stepmother, promptly finished the curse by calling her a 'royal [[CountryMatters cunt]]'. Serious just chuckles and asks if Scootaloo was watching Creator/GeorgeCarlin again.

* Sam's little brother, Mike in ''Film/SixteenCandles'', about his sister, Ginny, who's getting married:
-->'''Mike:''' She got her period. Should make for an interesting honeymoon, huh?
-->'''His father:''' Where are you learning that stuff?
-->'''Mike:''' School.
-->'''His father:''' Good. Gettin' my money's worth.
* From ''Film/{{Airplane}}'': "I take it black, like my men."
* From the 1998 remake of ''Film/TheParentTrap'':
-->'''Annie as Hallie:''' I don't mean to be jerky when you're trying to be all mushy and everything, but I know what mystery my dad sees in you.
-->'''Meredith:''' You do?
-->'''Annie as Hallie:''' You're young and beautiful and sexy and, hey, the guy's only human. But if you ask me, marriage is supposed to be based on something more than just sex, right?
** For that matter, both the twins are quite eloquent for 11-year-olds throughout the movie. It's just that this is the only time adult subject matter gets this treatment.
* Much of what Short Round says in ''Film/IndianaJonesAndTheTempleOfDoom''. "Maybe he like... ''older'' women."
* From ''Film/DropDeadFred'':
-->'''Mom:''' And the prince took the beautiful young girl in his arms and said, "will you marry me?" "Yes", she whispered, "I will be your princess".
-->'''Young Elizabeth:''' Did they live [[HappilyEverAfter happily ever after]]?
-->'''Mom:''' Of course, Elizabeth.
-->'''Young Elizabeth:''' How do you know?
-->'''Mom:''' Because she was a good little girl. If she had been naughty, the prince would have run away.
-->'''Young Elizabeth:''' What a pile of shit!
* From ''Film/TheWeddingSinger'':
-->"Hey, Linda! You're a bitch!"
-->"He... he may have Tourette's Syndrome, we're looking into it..."
* From ''Film/LethalWeapon'': "My Mama says policemen shoot black people!" Mel Gibson was laughing ''so hard'' in that scene.
* Eric in ''Film/MysteryTeam'' Take this scene in a gentleman's club:
-->'''Jason:''' What are you doing here?
-->'''Eric:''' My mom works here.
-->(Blank stares)
-->'''Eric:''' What? It's better than shaking your shit on the street.
* Inverted in ''Film/KickAss'' when Big Daddy is stunned by daughter Mindy's birthday request for a cuddly, fluffy puppy and a Bratz movie star makeover Sasha. She then lets him in on the joke, amending her request to a Benchmade model 42 butterfly knife.
-->'''Mindy:''' I'm just fucking with you, dad.
* Darian to the BigBad Marcone in ''Film/TheLastBoyScout'': "Eat shit, you fucking redneck!"
* 14 year-old Poppy in ''Film/FiredUp'' calls Bianca a "lesbotron". There are ad-libbed alternative readings in the credits, one of which is bleeped out, but could be "you fucking dyke!"
* ''Film/{{Leprechaun}}'': "Fuck you Lucky Charms!"
* A defining trait of [[EmotionlessGirl Wednesday]] in the ''Film/TheAddamsFamily'' movies.
* ''Film/IronMan3'': In the middle of a panic attack, Tony's kid sidekick says "if you're a mechanic, why don't you build something?" Tony ''instantly'' calms down. What's interesting is that we actually ''see'' him testing Tony's PTSD earlier, [[NotSoDifferent pushing the limits of acceptable behavior a lot like Tony does]].
* A RunningGag in ''Film/KindergartenCop'' is the little kid who says, "Boys have a penis, and girls have a vagina."
-->'''O'Hara:''' (''to Kimble'') [[DeadpanSnarker I see you've covered the basics.]]
** The scene where the kids talk about what their dads do for work is full of this.
--->'''[[SingleMindedTwins Rina and Tina]]:''' Our mom says our dad is a real sex machine.
* In ''Film/HocusPocus'', Dani's mocking of her big brother Max's lack of sex life isn't limited to repeatedly saying that [[VirginShaming he's a virgin]]:
-->'''Dani:''' (''to Alison'') Max likes your [[UnusualEuphemism Yabbos]]. In fact, he loves them!
* In ''Film/DemolitionMan'', in an archived story about one of John Spartan's defused hostage situations:
-->'''Reporter:''' How can you justify [[DestructiveSavior destroying a seven million dollar mini-mall to rescue a girl whose ransom was only twenty-five thousand dollars]]?
-->'''Girl:''' Fuck you, lady!
-->'''Spartan:''' Good answer.
* In ''Film/AmericanPie'' when Kevin and Vicky are about to do it in Stifler's house, his little brother pops out of the closet and says "you guys are gonna fuck, aren't you?" - and Kevin pushes him out of the room all the while he keeps chanting "fuckers", which they find ActuallyPrettyFunny.
* In ''Film/Robocop2'', Detroit has deteriorated to the point where gangs of violent and foul-mouthed kids are going on crime sprees. Then there's Hob, who is crueler, smarter and more ambitious.

* Sefalet's left-hand mouth says things no child should say in ''Literature/DirgeForPresterJohn''. And she has no control over it.
* Subverted in one book of the ''Literature/MythAdventures'' when Skeeve ends up taking care of a precocious little girl because he won her in a card game. She says Darndest Things at horrible times and adult characters have their hands full explaining things to her. Turns out, [[spoiler: she's an adult of a species that always looks like children ''and'' she's a ''character assassin'' who was saying those things deliberately to ruin Skeeve's business.]]
* In ''Literature/TheNightingaleKristinHannah'', Sophie rebuffs Vianne's attempt to console her, by claiming that no, she won't see [[spoiler:Sarah]] in heaven, because ''she was Jewish''. Sophie makes it clear that she sees this as a patronizing comment from Vianne and does not appreciate it. Vianne is too shocked by this response to reply.
* ''Literature/WaxAndWayne'' has Marasi--a female rookie cop--questioning a little boy on the street about a suspect...
-->'''Marasi:''' We're looking for a man.
-->'''Kid (leering):''' If you need a man, I'm right here.
-->'''Marasi:''' Oh please. You're... what, nine?
-->'''Kid (to buddies):''' Hey, she knows how long it is! *[[TroublingUnchildlikeBehavior grabs]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice crotch]]* Have you been peeking at me, lady?
* OlderThanRadio example with ''Literature/TheEmperorsNewClothes'': ''"[[TooDumbToFool But he has no clothes on!]]"''

[[folder:Live Action TV]]
* ''Series/MySoCalledLife'': When fifteen-year-old Angela begins hanging out with an effeminate Puerto Rican boy, her mother Patti objects. Danielle, who delivers the final line here, is Angela's nine-year-old sister:
--> '''Patti''': I find Rickie a little confusing.
--> '''Angela''': Okay, so maybe he's bi. Who cares? His cousin can still drive.
--> '''Patti''': What? He is what? Do you hear these terms she's throwing around? Bi?
--> '''Danielle''': It means bisexual.
* In the ''Series/LeaveItToBeaver'' TV series, Wally tries to upbraid his little brother for falling for a panhandler's story. When he calmly states that he knew perfectly well the panhandler was making it up, Eddie demands to know why Beaver gave him money. "Because nobody ever told me a story like that before."
** In another episode Beaver asks Ward if he's a married man. Ward assures Beaver that he is. Beaver asks if June is a married woman. Ward assures Beaver that she is.
-->'''Beaver:''' Have you ever kissed any other married woman besides Mom?
-->'''Ward:''' Why Beaver! Why would you ask a question like that?
-->'''Beaver:''' I'm just wondering.
-->'''Ward:''' Well, actually son, no.
-->'''Beaver:''' I guess you were scared to, huh?
-->'''Ward:''' Yeah, that's as good a way as any to sum it up I guess.
-->'''Beaver:''' I guess a guy could into a lot of trouble doing that, huh?
-->'''Ward:''' (''looking off into the distance, mumbling'') He sure could... uh, buh Beaver, I've got to finish this plug son, so you run off and play.
* Done repeatedly on ''Series/TwoAndAHalfMen''. Jake would hear or see something at his uncle Charlie's house that his father, Alan, didn't want him to be exposed to. Alan would then launch into some bizarre explanation in an attempt to protect Jake's "innocence". We then learn that Charlie and Jake were just messing with Alan and that Jake already knew what was going on.
* Intentionally invoked by ''Series/TheManShow'', with a kid they hired as "The Man Show Boy", who would go around town saying things to people they wouldn't expect a kid to know.
* In ''Series/TheFreshPrinceOfBelAir'' episode "Be My Baby Tonight", 13-year-old Ashley asks Will to tell her everything he knows about sex. He is appalled as she goes on to say that she knows all about eggs, sperm and fallopian tubes. He says, "Am I going to have to wash your mouth out with soap, young lady?"
* In ''Series/TheNewNormal'', Shania calls Jane a bigot, and unfriends her.
* In a season 3 episode of ''Series/GoodLuckCharlie'', Charlie managed to scare off all of Amy's baby shower guests after revealing her mother's true feelings towards the guests.
* ''Series/MadMen'':
** While visiting her dad's office, Sally Draper, about seven, tells [[MsFanservice Joan Holloway]] "You have big ones. My mommy has big ones, and when I grow up I'm going to have big ones too." (She later [[TroublingUnchildlikeBehavior drains a glass of his booze too.]])
** In the Season 4 episode "The Chrysanthemum and the Sword", Sally asks her babysitter, Don's neighbor, if she and Don are "doing it", and says she knows that the man pees inside the women.
* An occasional source of humor on ''Series/TheSopranos'': the adults swear constantly, but when a child (especially their own) does the same they're appalled.
* In the ''Series/VeronicaMars'' episode "Green-Eyed Monster", Wallace mentions to his mother he's going to be giving Jackie a hand with her trigonometry. [[DoubleEntendre He's not being very subtle with his entendres]], but it is still a shock to him and his mother when his little brother Darrell pipes up, "Are you hitting that?"
* Played with amusingly ''Series/MyWifeAndKids'', Michael and Jay attend Kady's school play. The children at the end shout to the audience "[[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything You put the peanut in the peanut hole!]]", a line which none of the parents seem to get. It's only in the evening when Michael (in bed with Jay, no less) figures it out:
-->'''Michael:''' "You put the peanut in the peanut hole", I get it!
-->'''Jay:''' I still don't get it.
--->'''Michael:'''You will...(''moves in closer to Jay and turns the light off'')
* Jimmy Kimmel thought it would be funny for parents to record themselves telling their young kids that they ate all the Halloween candy. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RK-oQfFToVg Here's the result.]]
* On ''Series/EverybodyHatesChris'', the babysitter they have in one episode is a teenage mom. Tonya tells the babysitter's mother "My mom told me she would kick me out if I had a baby 'cause she ain't raisin' no babies. Why didn't you kick her out?"

* ''[[Magazine/ElectronicGamingMonthly EGM]]'' had [[http://www.1up.com/features/child-play two]] [[http://www.1up.com/features/child-play-part-ii articles]] where kids of the new millennium were asked to play games from before their time and interviewed on their opinions. The results were precious.
--> '''EGM:''' Who's that chick Mario is rescuing up there (in ''Franchise/DonkeyKong'')? \\
'''Brian:''' It's Princess Peach. \\
'''Kirk:''' It's a hooker. \\
'''Niko:''' She looks cut in half. \\
'''Tim:''' Oh wow -- she's one of those pole dancers.
** As a sidenote, that's Pauline, not Peach.

[[folder:Newspaper Comics]]
* The comic strip ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'' did this frequently, as Calvin knew just enough about the adult world to get into trouble. In one strip, Calvin lectures his father that everybody must do their part for the economy; in other words, his allowance should be raised so there is more money in circulation. His father says, "I've got to stop leaving the ''Wall Street Journal'' lying around." Later strips used Calvin's incredibly-non-six-year-old worldview to make political or societal statements. Even more incredibly, he did it without ever becoming [[WriterOnBoard preachy or heavy-handed]].
-->'''Calvin''': Why would it be worth four dollars a minute to talk on the telephone to goofy ladies who wear their underwear on TV commercials? \\
'''Mom''': When were you watching ''that?!'' \\
'''Calvin''': Um... it was on... uh... during my morning cartoons.

-->'''Calvin''': Do you have any kids, Uncle Max? \\
'''Max''': Me? Nope, I'm not even married. \\
'''Calvin''': Oh. ...What difference does ''that'' make? \\
'''Max''': Kid watches a lot of TV, does he?

-->'''Calvin''': Boy, what a day! I went to school, played outside, and did my homework. I'm exhausted. You know what time it is now? \\
'''Dad''': Uh, 7:35. \\
'''Calvin''': It's Miller Time.

-->'''Calvin''': Why do you live in this house with Mom instead of an apartment with several scantily clad female roommates?

-->'''Rosalyn:''' It's my job to watch you, and that's what I'm going to do, even if I have to strap you to a chair. Got it?\\
'''Calvin (saluting with one hand and clicking his heels):''' Jawohl, mein Fuhrer!\\
'''Rosalyn ([[DudeNotFunny grabbing Calvin by the shirt]]):''' Care to repeat that little comment?\\
'''Calvin:''' I said I'm not going anywhere. Leggo.
* For a seven-year old, ComicStrip/{{Mafalda}} certainly knows a lot about politics. So do her friends, to a degree.
* This trope is a standard one for ''ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}}'' with the characters frequently displaying a vocabulary and grasp of concepts you'd never expect kids to have:
--> Linus: [Doing the classic finger gestures with this rhyme for Sally]: "Here's the church...here's the steeple...open the door...and see all the people!"
--> Sally: "It looks like a rather small congregation."

[[folder:Video Games]]
* ''VideoGame/Persona3'' has a fun example. New Year's day has the guys in the team admiring the girls in their [[KimonoFanservice kimonos]]. The resident cute little boy Ken asks if the girls are cold. When questioned why it's because [[CasanovaWannabe Junpei]] says that [[GoingCommando they wear nothing underneath]]. Cue Yukari stomping on Junpei's foot and asking if he told Ken anything else. (This may be better in ''Portable'' when it's possible to have a [[MayDecemberRomance romantic]] relationship with Ken)
* ''VideoGame/{{Solatorobo}}'' contains a mild case. While Elh manages to confuse Red and Chocolate about [[spoiler:being female]], one of the orphans immediately [[spoiler:realizes she's a girl and asks her why she dresses like a boy]]. Red replies that it makes it easier to play, volunteering a flustered Elh for babysitting duty. Only question is, how exactly did the kid ''know that''...?
* The first Dark Brotherhood quest in ''VideoGame/TheElderScrollsVSkyrim'' has you killing the vicious woman who runs the orphanage. The children cheer you after the deed, but one girl very calmly acknowledges that killing one person can solve a lot of people's problems and that she is "wondering at the possibilities."
* ''VideoGame/{{Fallout 3}}'': Most children--unsurprisingly, given that the series is known for its BlackHumor. Little Lamplight in particular has some kids using all but the [[CountryMatters most taboo]] swear words in every sentence.
* In ''VideoGame/TheLastOfUs'', Ellie surprises Joel in that she is a wise-talking, swearing, clever girl (who is also handy with a gun or two and not afraid to complete dangerous tasks). There's also her reaction to a gay porn magazine she finds:
-->'''Ellie''': Light on the reading, but it has some ''interesting'' photos.
-->'''Joel''': Now, Ellie, that ain't for kids...
-->'''Ellie''': Whoa... how- how the hell would he even walk around with that thing?
-->'''Joel''': Get rid of that! Just-
-->'''Ellie''': Hold your horses, I wanna see what all the fuss is about. Oh... why are these all stuck together?
-->'''Joel''': Ummm...
-->'''Ellie''': I'm just fuckin' with you. *throws magazine out the window*

* ''Webcomic/TheCyantianChronicles'': Tae, during a conversation with Kea. Tae and Kea together, at points. Kibi, who is smarter than many adults. Collin and Quinn, during Akaelae.
* ''[[Webcomic/GhastlysGhastlyComic Ghastly's Ghastly Comic]]'': [[MemeticMutation Tentacoo wape!]]
* Christine, Sonichu and Rosechu's daughter from ''Webcomic/{{Sonichu}}'' does this in the Christmas special whilst dressed as the Virgin Mary for a school play. [[WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy "I am the Virgin Mary. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it."]] ([[{{Squick}} Incidentally, she's a little kid]]. Although most people who know about the author seem to think he has no idea what the line actually means.)
* Jay Naylor's ''Webcomic/BetterDays'' often invokes this to [[WriterOnBoard deliver a moral so objectivist it would make Steve Ditko puke himself]].
* ''Webcomic/SomethingPositive'':
** Jason has a very awkward time playing Santa.
--->"My mommy says you're a pagan representation designed to steal glory from Christ and I should tell you you're gonna burn in Hell forever. I want a Barbie."
** Kestrel has [[http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp04032007.shtml just as bad a time]] as the Easter Bunny.
---> My mom says you can't be too careful at events like this. They let just anyone show up and she says if I'm not careful, I'll catch an airbourne disease, like atheist or negro.
* [[http://xkcd.com/751/ This]] ''WebComic/{{xkcd}}'' strip, in which a child finds "Daddy's Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue" - and has seen so many inappropriate things on the internet that they're shocked that the girls have clothes ''on.'' [[SpoofAesop "Parents, talk to your kids about popup blockers."]]
* Kids in ''Webcomic/ScaryGoRound'' (and other Franchise/{{Bobbinsverse}} comics) are prone to this sort of behavior, [[http://www.scarygoround.com/?date=20150817 as here.]]
-->'''Humphrey:''' Daddy said I should hide my piggy bank while you're here. But he said it wouldn't be for long.

[[folder:Web Original]]
* ''Literature/WhateleyUniverse'': In combination with YouNeedToGetLaid in [[http://whateleyacademy.net/index.php/2nd-gen-canon/788-rts-p1 Raises the Sun (Part 1)]]:
--> “You’re stiff like that guy Daddy talked about at the Palace.” The young six year old piped up. Before anyone could say anything, she continued. “You need to ... oh, yes, go to a strip club and relax, as Daddy said about that guy.” Pausing once again, with James repressing a snicker, and a slight glare from Kiko to her husband as he cringed slightly, she then burbled on. “Though what’s a strip club?”\\
“From the mouth of babes, eh?”

[[folder:Western Animation]]
* Early ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'' was based almost entirely around this trope.
** Commentary for the 10th season episode Smug Alert has Trey Parker and Matt Stone saying they did the episode primarily so that they could have the child voicing Ike say "Tripping Balls."
** The movie focused heavily on this too, but later episodes it seems the adults have given up (in the case of some, like Counselor Mackey and Randy Marsh, they have their own issues to deal with).
* [[WesternAnimation/{{Animaniacs}} Yakko, Wakko, and Dot.]] Yakko's physically about 14, Wakko's physically 10, and Dot's physically 8. And yet, some of the things they say are a bit...
-->"Let me know when those costumes get heavy, ladies!"
* This [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar gem]] from ''WesternAnimation/TheAdventuresOfJimmyNeutronBoyGenius'', which [[DeconstructedTrope deconstructs]] the FridgeLogic of a [[ChildProdigy 10-year-old genius]] with an extensive knowledge of human biology when Jimmy tells his parents that he wants a baby brother:
--> Hugh: ''(SpitTake)'' Baby making is very... ''complicated,'' believe me.
--> Jimmy: Dad, Dad, it's ''not'' complicated. Really, really, it's --
--> Hugh: You don't know --
--> Jimmy: It's basically conception, right?
--> Hugh: ''(Sticks fingers in ears and hums "la la la la")''
--> Jimmy: ...then a nine month gestation period...
--> Hugh: [[IgnoringBySinging La la la la...]]
--> Jimmy: ... and then you have...
--> Judy: Sweetie, a new baby just isn't in the cards right now.
--> Jimmy: [[ComicallyMissingThePoint But mom,]] [[LiteralMinded if the glandular timeline--]]
--> Hugh: That's enough! OK! Ha ha, [[ChangeTheUncomfortableSubject I want pie!]] Anyone else want pie? I want pie!
* ''WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender:'' Meng, a pre-teen girl, calls Katara a floozy under her breath when she learns Aang (whom Meng had a crush on) prefers Katara.
* From ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'', seven year old Ikki sees nothing wrong with letting Asami know that her friend Korra is in love with her boyfriend.
* On one episode of ''WesternAnimation/KingOfTheHill'', Hank jokes with Bobby about girls having cooties, only for him to ask what cooties are. Hank explains that it's the disease that you get from girls, only for Bobby to reply, "Oh, you mean like chlamydia?"
* Quoted verbatim in the couch gag of ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'' episode "The Cad and the Hat" where Homer enters a parody of ''WesternAnimation/SouthPark'' with the four boys spouting constant bleeped profanity.


[[folder:Real Life]]
* 1960s-vintage TalkShow host [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Art_Linkletter Art Linkletter]] had a regular segment on his program ''House Party'' called "Kids Say The Darnedest Things" -- later [[SpinOff spun off]] into a show itself -- in which he interviewed children to solicit these kinds of observations for their comedic value. (Being the 1960s, they were -- generally -- a bit milder than today's version.)
** Bill Cosby picked up this ball from 1998-2000, with the show ''Series/KidsSayTheDarndestThings'', which has yielded at least one compilation book.
* ''Website/NotAlwaysRight'' has a lot of these.
** [[http://notalwaysright.com/from-the-mouth-of-babes-part-2/5769 From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 2]]:
--> Me: “Can I help you?”
--> Child: “I don’t get it.”
--> Me: “What?”
--> Child: “Are you old or just simple?”
--> Me: “Excuse me?”
--> Child: “Cause my mom said everyone who works at [supermarket] is either old or simple.”
--> (The mother comes running behind him, picks him up, and runs off.)
** [[https://notalwaysright.com/dont-butt-in-line-if-you-cant-pay-the-fine/86492/ Don't Butt in Line, if You Can't Pay the Fine]]. When politeness doesn't get a five-year-old anywhere, adult language does.
* The ''Daily Mail'', a conservative UsefulNotes/{{British Newspaper|s}}, has a similar section among its letters page.
* Bill Engvall says this about when he had to have TheTalk with his son:
-->So I sat him down and said, "Son, I know you already know a lot of things, so why don't you do this: why don't you tell me what you know, and I'll just fill in the blank spots." About 30 minutes later, I'm sitting there with a pen and a pad of paper, going, "You can DO that?!?"
* [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CU040Hqbas&feature=share This video]]
* Dara O'Briain mentions this happening in a story he told on the DVD of 'Craic Dealer' at about [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_0Ae9o2qZA 47:22.]]
* Creator/BlakeLively says that when her daughter James first learned to talk, she had an unfortunate habit of turning words that start with 's' into 'sh'. So when she asks for someone to come ''sit'' with her...
--> "I have Amy Schumer as a daughter."
* Creator/MaraWilson describes her mother telling her about sex when she was five years old. But she had to film ''Film/MrsDoubtfire'' the next day and apparently ran around the set shouting "I know what sex is!" and variations of that. The crew and Robin Williams found it ActuallyPrettyFunny. Mara's mother did ''not''.
* Eavesdrop on any group of children playing together and you're bound to hear something kind of messed up eventually. Kids swear and play games where they "kill" each other pretty much daily.
* Creator/SamuelLJackson has said that his typical ClusterFBomb rubbed off on his daughter from a very young age, and she would thoroughly shock other parents by dropping f-bombs at parties.
* During the filming of ''Film/{{Logan}}'', there was a scene where Logan (Hugh Jackman) had to shout at Laura (Dafne Keen) "[=SHUT THE=] [[AtomicFBomb FUCK]] [=UP=]!", which went on for 40 minutes, and after that he went to María, Dafne's mother, to apologize for that. María cheerfully replied that Dafne had just called him a [[CountryMatters cunt]] in Spanish.
* [[https://www.reddit.com/r/MurderedByWords/comments/7xaiql/kid_accidentally_murders_soldier_for_valentines/ This letter a child sent to a soldier for Valentine's Day]].