Eldest Whistler, for all that she's an Aloof Eldest Sister, causes a lot of these with her intense familial loyalty and her kindness to her insecure, vulnerable brother Jerin.
She finds a stripped and murdered man she vaguely knew and takes her coat off to cover him with, "her eyes furious". She's then desperately afraid for her little brothers and has to go back to protect them.
This is a world where a man who's had premarital sex is often considered be ruined forever. Eldest is enraged when she believes Ren raped her brother, but cools to hear his explanations and is gentle when he bursts into tears.
Mother Elder giving Corelle a chance to make up for her poor decisions.
"You can't make good decisions as an adult if you were never allowed to make any decisions while you were a child."
The Whistler sisters are too proud to admit total ignorance of the bell-pull system. Without being told, Jerin knows to ask for them.
Sometimes it's the little things, such as when reluctant bride Trini finally takes Jerin's hand and addresses him affectionately. She doesn't have a problem with him as a person, she just didn't really want to remarry. Given how brutal the princesses' first husband was toward her, her attitude is understandable. It's still really nice when she does warm up to her new husband, though.
Preparing for a hot bath in the family bath house (a highly unusual amenity) Jerin reflects on how the said house was just one of the several ways his grandmothers turned themselves inside-out to please their captured husband. Basically what Alannon wanted he got - he seems to have been happy with his low-class soldier wives.