Funny / The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

• Gandalf's reaction to the armored trolls after commanding the Gondorian troops to stand their ground.
• Gandalf gets absolutely fed up with Denethor and cuts his Doom and Gloom rant short by beating the guy up with his staff. The background music even stops while this is happening.
  • Moment of Awesome as well.
  • The expression he has just screams 'I am so done with your crap'
• Merry and Pippin's rendition of 'The Green Dragon', when they're singing and dancing on the table, drinks in hand, to the beat set by clapping Rohirrim/thumping tankards, and often utterly careless of what they might be kicking - this includes Gamling's drink, all over him.
• Also, the Drinking Game between Legolas and Gimli.
  Legolas: I feel something. A slight tingling in my fingers. I think it's affecting me!
  Gimli: (very drunk) What'd I say? He can't hold his liquor! (passes out)
  Legolas: (short pause) Game over.
• As Gimli drinks, he pauses briefly to lean forward and rip a fart. That's right, the Lord of the Rings threw a fart joke into the Extended Edition.
• Drunk Gimli:
  Gimli: Here's ta dwarves that go swimmin'... with little hairy women! Heh heh heh!
  • And Éomer's reaction to Legolas' "I think it's affecting me"; a look that screams "You people are just weird."
  • It is somewhat justified. In The Hobbit, it is explained that the Wood Elven royalty drink wine that is so high in alcohol content, more than a small cup will knock you unconscious.
  • Mere mortal beverages cannot be expected to take down the son of Randy Thrandy.
• When Aragorn leaves Dunharrow for the Paths of the Dead, he tells Gimli that he must stay behind, but:
  Legolas: (approaching from behind) Have you learnt nothing of the stubbornness of dwarves?
• Gimli in the Paths of the Dead, utterly mortified by having to walk on and crush the innumerable skulls lying in his path. Made even more hilarious by how he tries, and fails, to walk on them oh-so-gently and inconspicuously.
  • As ghostly green claws form in the mist to paw at Gimli, the Son of Gloin frantically *blows* to dissipate them.
  • Again at the Gates of the Dead, Aragorn and Legolas head in fearlessly, while Gimli is still hesitant, and realizes some appropriate irony.
    Gimli: Well, this is a thing unheard of! An elf will go underground where a dwarf dare not?... [groans, then follows] Oh, I'd never hear the end of it!
• Being with knowledge of the books, Denethor's death scene was Narm to the 10th power. A very old man, on fire, sprinting the length of a football field to just drop off like a flaming meteor... Hilarious. And it also managed to turn Gandalf's reaction — verbatim from the book — into a pun.
  Gandalf: [as Denethor runs by] So passes Denethor, son of Ecthelion.
  • The French dub missed a massive occasion for a pun there, considering that one of the ways to announce that someone's just died is to say that they went out (like a fire).
  • The DVD commentary has Jackson and Co. joking that they considered making the scene even more over the top, like having Denethor pull out a parachute only for that to catch on fire as well, or for his parachute to actually be full of tableware or an anvil like in Looney Tunes.
• Aragorn tells Legolas to fire a warning shot to Sauron's pirate reinforcements, Gimli then nudges the bow so he nails one of them dead center in the chest. Made better by a Casting Gag: the pirates were all played by the production staff, and Peter Jackson was the one who got killed.
• Merry and Pippin greeting their bewildered friends while enjoying the wares of conquered Isengard, looking as smug as can possibly be. "The salted pork is particularly good."
  • And of course Gimli's reaction to that line: he immediately stops being angry at the Hobbits when he realizes that there's bacon nearby.
  • Gandalf, on the other hand, gives the tiniest, frustrated mutter of, "Hobbits."
  • Before the others show up, Pippin comments about how sitting on the wrecked wall of Isengard makes him feel like he's back at the Green Dragon, with "A mug of ale in my hand, putting my feet up on a settle after a hard day's work."
    Merry: Only, you've never done a hard day's work. [Pippin shrugs in agreement, and both laugh]
• Gimli's quote during the planning for the Battle of the Black Gates:
  "Certainty of death. Small chance of success. What are we waiting for?"
  • Made even better because he spends that entire scene lounging in Denethor's throne while smoking his pipe like he owns the place.
• After Frodo has destroyed the ring, Sam's crying about how he would have married Rosie is hilarious. The moment is meant to be quite tragic but the one detail he puts emphasis on is that she was wearing ribbons in her hair the last time he saw her.
• Gandalf warns Pippin about all the things he shouldn't bring up in front of Denethor...and finally decides that it would be best if he just didn't say anything. And then it turns out Denethor already KNOWS about the things Pippin was told not to bring up (except Frodo and the Ring)! (And if you go by the books, he knows about those too.)
• There is a Funny Background Event during the Battle of the Pelennor Fields (that could also count as a CMOA): The ghost army attacks one of those enormous and very tough oliphaunts like a swarm of ants — and brings it down within one second!
• Legolas' takedown of the mûmak, which goes beyond Awesome into hilarious. He jumps onto its tusk as it's running and then manages to jump from there onto first its front left foot then onto the back, climbs up said leg using arrows sticking out of its flesh like a rock wall before firing at the Haradrim from the rear taking them by surprise. He then grabs a loose strap of the mûmak's harness and swings down a la Tarzan (minus the call), he then severs the rest of the straps with his knife so that the tower slides off and falls to the ground while pulling him up onto mûmak's back before running along its spine and firing three arrows simultaneously into its brain. It collapses on the dirt and as it does so he nonchalantly walks across the head, slides down its trunk then steps off onto the grass...and then gives a little head-twitch as if adjusting his collar like he's James freaking Bond, then walks away. Followed immediately by Gimli's annoyed, "That still only counts as one!"
  • more over the look of utter confusion on the mûmak's driver’s face as he hears the commotion occurring and looks back to see people falling off for apparently no reason.
• A minor one from the Extended Edition: during their infiltration of Mordor, Sam and Frodo wind up accidentally dragged along with a group of Orcs. They're trying to figure out a way to sneak away when the group gets halted...for inspection. That the Orcs who are riding the edge of Always Chaotic Evil have enough organization and discipline to have inspections is funny in such a tense scene.
  • This is aided by the fact that the orc slave driver that discovers Sam and Frodo (and mistakes them for orc deserters) is a delightful Large Ham.
    "Don't you know we're at WAAARR?!"
• Aragorn making a 'bitch, please' face at the Mouth of Sauron. Made funnier by the fact that it's a very serious scene.
  • When he rides up to the Mouth and casually slices his head off. Moment of Awesome, but the somewhat narmy scream of the Mouth and Gimli's deadpan "I suppose that concludes negotiations" make it funnier.
  • The Mouth of Sauron's introduction is a pretty funny moment as well. After riding up to them through the gates on his Hellish Horse, the Obviously Evil rider announces that "[his] master, Sauron the Great bids thee welcome!" He then tilts his head to the side, "politely" smiling at them in a way that just barely hides his contempt with his ugly, rotten fangs. The camera even cuts to the protagonists giving him a look that just screams "WTF?"
• At Cirith Ungol, an argument between an orc and an uruk over Frodo's mithril shirt escalates into a full-blown massacre.
  • First, the orc gets shoved through a hole, landing on top of the table of a squad of uruks who are eating. The uruk at the top of the orders the uruks to kill the orc. Despite being outnumbered, the orc puts up a fight, and manages to drop-kicks an uruk out a window after being grabbed.
  • The uruk unleashes a hilarious scream as he falls, before bouncing off the tower and landing in another orc encampment at the bottom. The uruks below immediately start pulling anything of value off of his corpse.
  • An orc tries to get in on the looting, but gets rudely shoved aside by one of the uruks. Angered, the orc grabs a drumstick and bashes one of the uruks, knocking him out cold, before turning to beat on another nearby uruk.
  • A different orc, presumably checking out the commotion, arrives and sees the brawl taking place. Without questioning it, he roars and and pounces on the nearest uruk.
  • Within seconds, the fight has escalated to the point where we see an orc viciously stabbing someone and an uruk dropping a huge bolder on someone's head.
  • When Sam arrives to rescue Frodo, Cirith Ungol is littered with dead bodies.
• In the battle outside Minas Tirith, Éowyn's arm is shattered by the Witch-King, but the Orc commander is chasing her to finish her. Their editing and the music build up this climactic battle between the two of them...only for the orc to get randomly whacked by Aragorn and Gimli as they run by.
• Sam wakes up shortly after Gollum throws away what's left of Sam and Frodo's food, and accuses Gollum of sneaking. Gollum acts offended "Sneaking? Sneaking?! Fat Hobbit is always so polite. Sméagol shows them secret ways that nobody else could find, and they say 'sneak!' Sneak! Very nice friend, oh yes my Precious...very nice". Sam essentially says "fine, I'm sorry. What were you doing then?" Gollum grins sheepishly and says "Sssneaking!"
• The "lighting the beacons" scene:
  • As Pippin is climbing the Beacon Tower, Gandalf stands on the street beneath him, standing guard and trying his best to look nonchalant. Yep, the End of the World is tomorrow, this city is going to be ground zero for the Apocalypse, and Mithrandir the Wizard is just hanging out on a street corner, not doing anything particular. Nothing to see here, citizen. Move along. Move along.
  • And immediately after he lights it successfully, he looks up proud of his daring achievement... Then realizes that he's still standing on a rather large pyre that's currently being engulfed in flames.
• A bit of black comedy: When the Rohirrim charge at the approaching army with the super-sized elephants that are decked out with weapons on their tusks and archers on their backs. It goes just as well as you'd imagine.
• Another black comedy moment: Eowyn is standing resolutely against the Witch-king to protect Theoden, and has managed to kill his Fellbeast. Cue the Witch King standing up, turning to give her a Death Glare, and lifting his extremely large mace. Eowyn's bug-eyed "Oh shit" expression is hilarious.
• When Sauron's tower begins to fall after the Ring is destroyed, seeing Sauron's eye looking around in a panic can be pretty funny.
• Samwise Gamgee, a stout, brave Hobbit who didn't hesitate for a moment before marching to Mordor, nearly drowned himself in the Anduin, and drove off a monster even gangs of orcs avoid...has to take an extra sip and build up some Liquid Courage before he gets up after the adventure to ask out Rosie.
• While travelling to the harbor, Bilbo asks Frodo if he can see "that old ring of mine" one last time. Cue a minor Oh, Crap! from Frodo who stares into the distance for a second before replying.
  Frodo: I'm sorry, uncle, I'm afraid I lost it.
  Bilbo: Oh, pity.
• When the hobbits return to the Shire wearing their fancy outfits and riding on equally fancy ponies, they're met by the same grumpy hobbit who was seen glaring at Gandalf while sweeping his front porch in The Fellowship of the Ring. They all smile at him as they pass by and his response is to simply shake his head and go right back to sweeping. In Gondor, the four hobbits were bowed to by the king himself as well as everyone present at the coronation, what do they get at home? A guy who looks at them like they're all a bunch of weirdos.
• From the Extended Edition, the scene with Saruman:
  • Gimli decides he's had enough of Saruman ranting on and says "I've heard enough. Shoot him! Stick an arrow in his gob!" to Legolas and Legolas actually reaches for the quiver of arrows, apparently intending to actually do it.
  • When Gandalf offers to spare him if he comes down, Saruman responds to the perceived pity with a fireball. It clears, and Gandalf is still sitting there on Shadowfax like nothing happened.
• After Pippin has looked in the Palantír Gandalf covers it up so that no one else will be tempted by it. Meanwhile Merry is worriedly hurrying up to Pippin who appears unconscious. Gandalf rushes over, so worried about Pippin (and about what might have transpired between him and Sauron) that he roughly just shoves Merry aside. It's hilarious, but poor Merry...
• The leader orc who finds Frodo after Shelob's wrapped him up is hilariously over-the-top. "She jabs him with 'er stingah, and he goes as LIMP as a boned fish! AGGHH!"