Funny / The Boys in the Band

• Many, many lines, like this one:
  Michael: (sings) C'mon forget your troubles, get happy / You better chase all you cares away... (Beat) What's more boring that a queen doing a Judy Garland impression?
  Donald: A queen doing a Bette Davis impression.
  • Later:
    Mike: (as Bette Davis) I adore cheap sentiment.
• Michael: Believe it or not, there was a time in my life when I didn't go around announcing I was a faggot.
  Donald: That must have been before speech replaced sign language.
• Harold gets some of the best lines.
  Harold: (to Emory) Your lips are turning blue. You look like you've been rimming a snowman.
• Michael: Sunt! That's French, with a cedilla!
• Emory has his moments, even during his most touching stories.
  Emory: (sighing a mixture of pride and wistfulness) Oh, Mary, it takes a fairy to make something pretty.
• Cowboy: I lost my grip doing my chin-ups and fell on my heels and twisted my back.
  Emory: You shouldn't wear heels when you do chin-ups!