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  • Rincewind is drowning his sorrows in The Mended Drum when Conina accosts him:
    Conina: Psst!
    Rincewind: Not yet, but I'm working on it.note 
  • The moment you realise that Creosote, Nijel and Conina have stolen the horses of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
    • The reactions of the horses' owners, too.
    • "We can't be the One Horseman and Three Pedestrians of the Apocalypse!"
    • They then decide to get drunk instead.
  • Vetinari getting turned into a newt. He gets better.
  • The bit when a voice speaks up in Rincewind's mind, saying "You rather like her, don’t you? I can tell", and the exchange afterwards. It was his libido speaking.
  • "Laugh This One Off". Funny to everyone, except the poor sap beneath the slab (or the poor sap who just missed getting hit by it).
  • Rincewind trying to build a tower in his sleep while Creosote, Conina, and Nijel watch him incompetently do so.
    "Rincewind carefully tried to balance a large rock on a small pebble. It fell off, but he appeared to be happy with the result."
  • What the Librarian is doing to a damaged book: an Appendixectomy.
  • When the heroes come across the mind-controlled Abrim, and Nijel searches his instruction book for how to deal with the undead. Turns out vampires can be defeated with garlic, whereas for zombies you need sea salt and lemon—
    Conina: We're trying to kill him, not cook him!
  • The initial description of Abrim, because he's so much of a Dastardly Whiplash. "He twirled his moustache, probably foreclosing about a dozen mortgages."
  • The Tripple Orc thrust with extra flip!
    • Of course, all he does is get his sword stuck in the ceiling.
    Nijel: I broke a lot of mirrors learning that one!
  • "The Librarian dropped on him like the descent of Man."

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