Funny / Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff

• It's hard to pick one scene from "Lamb The Gospel According To Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal" by Christopher Moore. However, the origin of the word "Judo" is at the top of the list.
• Josh healing a little girl's hand and then showing her how to give the finger to a Roman soldier.
• Biff the professional mourner.
  • Biff the expert on "knowing women."
• "I could heal that affliction for you..."
  • "What affliction?"
• Sea turtles.
• The running gag of Biff's mother being 'plagued by demons'.
• Drunk Jesus with a bunny rabbit.
• Maggie suddenly being "possessed" and the artful touches that Biff comments on, such as urinating whilst running across a table kicking plates.
• Joshua demonstrating his new contortionist talents by fitting himself in Biff's satchel, ending up dislocating limbs.
• Biff attempting to explain sex and the Kama Sutra to Joshua.
• Joshua explaining why what seems to be the image of Mary in the elephant poop isn't her because it was "obscured by the medium."
• Biff's and Joshua's derailing of Gaspar's boat metaphor.
• Biff's attempts to survive on the freezing mountain by the use of self-heating monk barriers and his use of them as food warmers.
• "There's a nubile wench!"
• The running gag of distracting someone or changing the subject with "Look! A seagull!"
• Josh originally intended the Sermon on the Mount to contain the phrase, "blessed are the dumbfucks." Biff vetoed it on the basis that they were already blessing the meek, the persecuted, the poor in spirit and all sorts of other losers who would be nothing but The Load, and he absolutely refused to let them be saddled with the dumbfucks too.
• The Buddhist monastery forbids masturbation, but grudgingly tolerates nocturnal emissions. So Biff promptly teaches himself to have Wet Dreams at will.