- From "Brent Horst: Politician"Brent Horst: *when asked about Economic Prosperity* I'm not sure what that...means, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with trainsBrent Horst: *asked about Education* If elected, I will make reading books very important. Kids should read books, instead of shooting guns at each other.Brent Horst: I am very much against murder. If elected, I will make it illegal to murder someone
- From "Everyday Normal Guy"Everyday Normal Guy: When I go to the clubs, I wait in line, motherfuckerEveryday Normal Guy: Last time I had sex was in 2003, and I'm ashamed to admit it, but it wasn't freeEveryday Normal Guy: I get constipated once a month, motherfuckerEveryday Normal Guy: I make pretty good spaghetti sauce, motherfuckerEveryday Normal Guy: When I get into a fight I usually leave on a stretcherEveryday Normal Guy: I have an According to Jim personality, I'm as entertaining as a fucking STDEveryday Normal Guy: I don't have many friends who would back me up, my friend Steve would, but he doesn't look very toughSteve: You want some of this, bitch?
- From "WTF Collective 3"MC Vagina: You can't spell chorus without... vagina.MC Final Verse: Um, yes you can.MC Vagina: That's racist.
- Everything MC Doesn't Know What Irony Is says.
- "Merry Christmas Exclamation Point," the perfect Christmas song circa-2013.
- In "WTF Collective 2," MC Knows Too Many Facts About Bees claims that knowing a lot about bees doesn't mean that he's gay. He's also MC In the Closet Homosexual.
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