Funny / Hell's Kitchen Roleplay

Considering it's a wackier version of the show itself, there's bound to be funny moments.

Season 8

• Let's be honest, just about anything that comes out of Frankie's mouth.
  • Frankie's reaction to Kylian's dish.
  Frankie: At this point he’s committing cooking Hiroshima.
  • Frankie's very...interesting description on what it's like to cook risotto in Hell's Kitchen.
  Frankie: There's a difference between regular risottos and Hell's Kitchen risottos. Regular risotto is just rice with stuff in it. Hell's Kitchen risotto is a bomb you have to defuse with one hand tied behind your back while blindfolded, while also receiving the worst reach-around in existence.
  • Frankie, who pretty much sums up Carl in the most Frankie way possible.
  Frankie: I'm worried about Carl's dish idea. Something about it screams bad idea, but hey, it's Carl. It's going to go through one ear and...straight out the other. Because that's how Carl works.
  • Later on, he mocks Celine's way of speaking when she puts up her dish...with Spongebob references.
  Frankie: Celine is like...here's my Krabby Patty with DELECTABLE toenail clippings, my IMMACULATE nose hair, and some DELICIOUS cheese.
  • After Toby sent something bad to the pass during the breakfast service.
  Frankie: Thanks a lot Toby, you sent your war crime of a plate to the pass, and now we're going to see how patriotic you'll be feeling in a second.
  • Then comes Frankie's reaction to when Donovan gradually starts to lose favor with the Red Team.
  Frankie: You know, something's telling me that the red team might be regretting getting Donovan...just like how I'm regretting letting him use my smoke pack...fucker smoked half of them.
  • Frankie's reaction after the blue team lost the craps challenge.
  Frankie: The lollipop company just called, they want the blue team to pose for the world's largest group of suckers. (Does a thumbs up, before turning it into a middle finger) Thanks Carl.
  • Frankie's reaction to Scott cooking his burger...complete with a Take That!.
  Frankie: Scott's cooking a burger, which from looks alone is about as far from southern as Nestle is from having a spotless human rights violation history.
  • This quote, which perfectly sums up Victor later on in the season.
  Frankie: Today, we found out that Victor apparently has a foot fetish, for he has opened mouth, insert foot.
  • After Scott makes a misstep with saying "pork chop".
  Frankie: Scott, it's pork chop, not porn chop. I know you have trouble spelling, but we don't need to know your browser history.
  • Frankie's reaction to Fifi's cranberry spaghetti.
  Frankie: That just sounds like a Thanksgiving dish that one aunt would bring over and no one would touch.
  • After Victor started to seriously scrutinize him and try to catch something bad he sent up, Frankie went downright wild with the jabs at him.
  Frankie: Victor’s all confident until he’s on his own, and that’s when he does the equivalent of rubbing two potatoes together in his brain.
  • As Scott is working his charity course, Frankie has an...unique way of describing his efforts.
  Frankie: I'm watching Scott, his piss-hole-in-the-snow-eyes darting around just looking for something to scream at the top of his lungs about...or a fresh blowfly to snack on. Moment he spots it, I'm telling you, his face will take on a glow not unlike the glow you might expect from the sight of a massive skin infection.
  • As Victor is bragging about how he's clearly doing better now.
  Frankie: (In a mocking tone) I have increased in power! (drops the accent) How 'bout you increase your bitches, lipstick?.
  • Of course, not even the people Frankie likes are safe from his snark.
  Frankie: Fi's nice and all, but when she's mad or trying to be mad, she kind of reminds of the wolf girl one would sit next to in the fourth grade. Just waiting for the eyes to turn green and for her to be “on the hunt”.