- In Iorich when Vlad goes to his old office, hides in the corner thinking invisible thoughts, and startles Kragar so badly he almost screams.
- In Issola: over the course of two chapters, Vlad manages to make Teldra and Aliera blush, embarrass Morrolan and Sethra, leave Verra speechless, and get a laugh out of both Teldra and Sethra.
- Best chapter title ever:
In Which the Plot, Behaving In Much the Same Manner As a Soup To Which Cornstarch Has Been Added, Begins, At Last, To Thicken.
- "How do you ask the Enchantress of Dzur Mountain if she's too drunk to handle a teleport safely?"
- Answer: You don't.
- In Taltos, Vlad and Morrolan are journeying to Deathsgate Falls when they encounter a band of cat-centaurs (feline lower bodies instead of equine). Vlad breaks the silence with a snarky comment. A cat-centaur named Brandy jokes back. Over the following conversation, several of the cat-centaurs turn out to be as much a bunch of wiseasses as Vlad, if not more so, until they're all straining to keep from losing it laughing.
- Made all the funnier because Morrolan is there too, and frustrated as hell that nobody's taking things seriously. He bonds with Mist, the leader of the cat-centaurs, over their endless frustration with Vlad and Brandy's seeming inability to turn off the snark.
- In Dragon, Vlad leads some of his tentmates on a midnight foray to incinerate the enemy force's breakfast supplies. Their sabotage mission goes flawlessly, but they nearly get busted for disturbing their own camp when they all get the giggles afterwards.
"Hope they like toast."
- Morrolan greeting Vlad, who's inspecting some books in Castle Black's library:
"You may borrow them, if you wish.""I'd like that very much.""I should warn you, however, that I have several volumes devoted to curses for people who don't return books.""I'd like to borrow those too."
- The scene in The Phoenix Guards where Khaavren and Pel explain to Tazendra that wondering about a lot of things means you're intelligent.
- Every single one of Loiosh's lines. Plus every one of Vlad's (as the narrator) lines and most of his in-character lines. Especially because no Dragaeran he ever encounters has a sense of humor.
- "Kragar, stop doing that!" "Stop doing what, boss?"