Funny / Dead West

• Gervas. High on drugs (he had been shot several times, and Mordechai gave him something to dull the pain). Needing a kitten to pet. Said kitten ends up being the Porcelain Doctor.
  • "Well... meow?"

• "My dear friend, I do believe these ragamuffins had shat themselves just from your sight." "Oh, I think this is just the dead one reeking."

• "If my baby brother ends up with as much as a scratch, I swear I'll had you..." "I am sorry, your Grace, but the enemy seems to be approaching fast. We will discuss your pastimes involving the deceased later."
  • Cue to a smirk and Cedric stating that he rather likes this dog, and Gervas don't even have to sleep in the kennel if he survives this. Also doubles as a Badass Boast.

• Gervas kissing and dipping Niall, then giving a peck on the lips to Cedric, too, for good measure. Their wives approve.
  • The helmet drops. Gervas seems to be a good kisser.

• The robbing attempt in the cabin. The two wannabe bandits enter, catching Gervas and the still recuperating Porcelain Doctor blindsided... then they botch it.
  Bandit 1:"Hands up, or we will shoot your woman!Give us all your money, or we will kneecap you and defile your wife right in front of you!"
  • Which leads to our heroes laughing (justified, as without any witnesses, Niall can crush two opponents), and the bandits changing tactic.
    Bandit 2: "Idiot, I've told you so! Look, Ma'am, if you don't obey, we will do the above mentioned things with your husband..."
    Niall (with a Death Glare): This was two missed attempts. My turn. *eyes change colour to icy blue, Slasher Smile* Get. Out.
  • And they run, while Gervas is lying in stiches.

• Niall cooks 'calamari' with pyrokineses. Badly.

• After a particulary stupid fight in an inn, Gervas, the Porcelain Doctor, Thomas and Louis take turns in kicking the already incapacitated assailants after the doctor took them down "to make a point". Bonus points for Thomas casually heeling one while he carries a large tea tray, and Louis treating them as they would be the natural parts of the floor, stepping on them more than once.

• The discussion of military reforms and uniforms. Especially the recount of the first Scottish military parade after some genius defined the length of the kilt in inches, and used commoners as a reference.
  • "Everybody stood at attention?"
  • "I suppose, the queen was still young."
  • To elaborate: most of the officers are aristocrats, who are one feet taller on average than a normal commoner. Imagine a bunch of giants in miniskirts. And a true Scotsman goes commando under the kilt.
  • Looks like is a ban on kilts again... which will not be lifted until the dress code is changed, but it won't happen for a while as the writer of the code is still alive.
    • Maybe it's for the better. Imagine Niall in a kilt...

• The sheer hilarity of the fact that Cedric, Badass Incarnate once uttered the words "I'm a fluffy bunny".