Funny / David Gemmell

  • In 'Hero in the Shadows' Yu Yu the Chiatze Ditch Digger seduces a maid in Waylander's palace. He is then confronted by some guardsmen who call him a slant-eyed pig and ask him why he feels he can steal their women. Yu Yu muddles up the translation and thinks he's being accused of stealing a woman's one-eyed pig.

  • From Swords of Night and Day:
Stavut: Why am I taking seduction advice from a man who's idea of foreplay is to slam some coins on the table and ask 'Who wants to ride the big horse?

  • Viruk The Avatar is a walking one of these, well when he's not murdering people

  • This Exchange between Rek and Bowman:
Rek: What will you do now?
Bowman: I think I will become a monk and devote my entire life to prayer and good works.
Rek: No. I mean, what will you do today?
Bowman: Ah! Today I'll get drunk and go whoring

  • Half of the protagonist of Morningstar - Owen Odell's attempts to reign in Jarek Mace and his psychotic tendencies

  • Scalers ill-fated tryst with Ravenna in The King Beyond the Gate