Funny / Counter-Strike

• Whenever a player/bot commits suicide by falling.
• When a hostage gets killed in the crossfire by bots.
  • No longer possible in Global Offensive.
• Whenever when a Pre-Source bot throws a grenade and it kills themselves, or even their teammates/everyone in their team/hostages.
• Whenever when Pre-Source bots equips their knives when the bomb is about to explode:
  • Worth extra laughs if they score a kill with it.
  • Even the CT bots near the site will try to flee.
• Watching a player die by knife after missing with an entire weapon magazine due to panic. Hilarious if they pull out their pistol and miss that as well.
• Riot Shield. cs_assault. Air duct.
  • Decidedly more funny (less so for the recipient unless they're playing for fun) for the one who throws an HE grenade into the vent.
• On the de_survivor bomb defusal map, the company of the plane that crashed is called "Oops Air". And the company's message on the fuselage is "No guarantee".
• The legendary DOOR STUCK.
  The phantom,
  exterior like fish eggs,
  interior like suicide wrist-red
  I could exercise you,
  this could be your phys-ed
  Cheat on your man homie—
  Aaaah, tried to sneak through the door man! Can't make it! Can't make it, the shit's stuck! Out of my way, son! DOOR STUCK!! DOOR STUCK!! PLEASE! I BEG YOU!! WE'RE DEAD! YOU'RE A G-GENUINE DICK SUCKE—
  • "Yo, I'm adding this guy to friends."
• The sheer ridiculousness of Bunny-Hopping trick in pre-Global Offensive era, before Valve decided there will be no more of such shenanigans. One individual named Phoon was particularly notorious user of the technique, as an old frag movie "Too much for zblock" demonstrates.
  Another player: "admin he doing it sideways"
• In Global Offensive, the Terrorists on cs_office. They basically amount to scene kids rebelling against The Man. Their lines are also hilarious. They realise how fucked up the situation now is and how screwed they are. They try to put a brave face on it.
• These DomenikTV's fail compilations exhibits typical mistakes that can happen in Counter-Strike... Except that it's PROS making the mistakes. Failed HE nade, match-ending death by falling, AWP teamkill... oh so many...
• Jumping off the building in Rise Hard in Condition Zero: Deleted Scenes hands out this Non-Standard Game Over:
  SUBJECT: OPERATION RISE HARD
  STATUS: MISSION FAILURE
  REASON: Operative tried to fly
• Hostage Strike.
  • The chickens are revolting!
• Please defuse the bomb, sir. Defusing bomb. Sir? The bomb? Where's the bomb? Where's the bomb? Where's the bomb? Where's the bomb? Where's the bomb?
• In the map cs_agency in CS:GO, there are 3 revolving billboards in the Main Hall. One of the signs on them has this in small print at the bottom: (though there IS an arrow pointing to it)
  You should probably focus on the enemy instead of reading signs
• Some of the voice clips in CS: GO are hysterical. Just a few examples:
  SAS: EASY PEASY LEMON SQUEEZY!
  GIGN: (killing an enemy team of pirates ) Yo-Ho-Ho! The pirates are dead!
  SWAT: At the foyer...Is that foy-YER or foy-YAY?
  SEAL Team: (friendly fire) What the foxtrot's wrong with you?
  IDF (rarely when equipping an expensive weapon) Oooooh, MAMA!
  Leet Crew: (friendly fire) I fear your bullets more than I fear our enemies'!
• Anomaly's notoriously over the top CSGO unboxing videos Here's a taste of the hilarity, be sure to lower your volume before hand.
• Whenever someone scores a double-kill with their sniper rifle, killing one enemy and one teammate
• The Legend of the Black Blues Player. Made of Win. Despite losing 16-3.
• The first thing you do in the tutorial of CS:GO;
  Instructor:"Now shoot that target over there."
  *blam*
  Instructor: "Congratulations, you just saved democracy!"
• Fan-made CS:GO Workshop skin: ECO-series, the No.1 provider of clean kills.
• At DreamHack Austin, minor team Splyce were able to get ahead of the more established CLG at 15-11 and were poised to win the game. Substitute player Summit made the final kill, and walked towards the bomb as the commentators declared their victory. He then proceeded to walk through his own incendiary grenade to his death, losing the round and ultimately the entire game.
• Deliberately playing obnoxiously loud audio through HLDJ, making your teammates even more vulnerable!
• Operation Shattered Web introduced Agents, applying the weapon skin system to the player model as a whole. One of these Agents is Slingshot, a T-sided Phoenix Connection operative who is noted to have a borderline obsession with knives, a nod to the CS fandom's own attraction to blades.

  Slingshot: If I can knife, I knife.

• If you killed the most chickens during a match in CS:GO, you will get the accolade "The Colonel" on the End-of-Match screen. Why? Because it's a reference to Colonel Sanders!
• Killing the last enemy wielding a knife with a gun brought this message in the endround:
  Player made the mistake of bringing a knife to a gunfight.
• In the Counter-Strike: Source version of cs_assault, a pallet can be found with washing machine and dryer boxes on it. Nothing funny about that, until you see that one of the boxes has been ripped open and the washing machine inside has dollar bills on top of and inside it. Literal money laundering!
• Source bots can sometimes shoots breakable objects in order to get through their way even risking of alerting nearby enemies and wasting some ammos. This can be noticed in certain maps such as marketplace in cs_italy.
• In CS:GO, killing a chicken in Deathmatch mode awards points for "neutralizing an enemy".
• Sometime during October 2023 in Counter Strike 2, players found out that re-binding movement keys in a certain way will cause the player character to do a "Michael Jackson peek", contorting the player model in a way that is hard to hit. Counter Strike's official Twitter/X account then decided to have some laugh and changed their header banner to this◊ while everyone is waiting for removal of the exploit.