Funny / Captain Ron

  • While trying to navigate through a cluster of boats, Captain Ron fails to inspire much confidence in Martin.
    Martin: Slow down! There's boats all over the place!
    Captain Ron: Don't worry. They'll get out of the way. I learned that driving the Saratoga.
  • Captain Ron, explaining how he lost his eye, and lost his last job.
    Captain Ron: It happened when I went down off the coast of Australia.
    Katherine: Your boat sank?
    Captain Ron: No, no, no, no. Not my boat. My boss's boat. Yeah, we hit this reef. Huge son-of-a-bitch. Ran the whole coast.
    Katherine: Wait. The Great Barrier Reef?
    Captain Ron: You've heard of it, huh? Smart lady.
  • The U.S. State Department send an agent to "help" Martin and Katherine in on San Juan.
    Agent: Mr. and Mrs. Harvey? I'm Bill Zachary from the U.S. State Department. I've got some good news for you.
    Katherine: Oh. You found our children.
    Agent: No. But you're not being charged with subversion.
  • Ben and Captain Ron play Monopoly, for "real" money.
    Captain Ron: Three houses, 375! That's 37 cents.
    Ben: Well that's... Half the money I have left.
    Captain Ron: Yeah, shit happens. Cough it up.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/CaptainRon