- Pinkie's job application to the Grassy Knoll:
Previous Employment:
Rock Farmer
Apprentice Baker
Party Planner
Party Executor
Secret Agent (Don't tell anypony, though)
Professional Skeptic (Oatmeal only)
Demolition Expert, specializing in fourth walls
Element of Harmony, Laughter
Notable Accomplishments:
Laid siege to the sheep kingdom capital of Baa Ram Ewe for six hundred days
Battled the forces of the criminal underworld under the super-secret alias of (the last word was scribbled away beyond recognition)
Has memorized names, ages, addresses, social security numbers, and known weaknesses of every pony in Ponyville. Including yours.
Can lick her own elbow
Can lick other ponies' elbows (Easier, unless they run)
Thanks to foresight, precognition, and advance preparation, has never been caught off guard by sock emergencies
Capable of withstanding temperatures up to 1,500 degrees Marenheit
Saved Equestria, like, a lot
So yeah, you should totally hire me.
