Pretty Fly for a White Guy: A young white man goes around pretending he's black. He later gets arrested by two racist cops and jailed for crime he didn't commit because he was the only one in the vicinity fitting the description of a "young black male" who had robbed a yarn store nearby.
Sorry Billy, But You Just Don't Have Legs: Parodied. We are introduced to the "inspirational portrait of the week", which involves a man with no legs (and then no arms) first declaring that he wanted to do ballet since he was a child. After maybe 15 seconds, what he wanted to do all his life was hockey. A sequence of him follows being tackled harshly.
Worst News Judgment Ever: A woman witnesses a house explode on the other side of the street and calls the Onion News hotline. The following scene shows an Onion van arriving on the spot to report on her husband's missing socks, which makes the front page. The people in the neighborhood exhibit similar behavior, being far more interested in the presence of the Onion news team than the catastrophe that had just taken place.