Fanfic / True Love Is Never A Straight Path

True Love Is Never A Straight Path is a The Brittas Empire fic by Holo Mew 151 first released in 2023. This fic begins when Helen, still reeling from the events of "Sex, Lies and Red Tape", once again comes across Michael T. Farrell III at a bar. It's not long before the two begin a romantic relationship, having repercussions on the relationship between her and Brittas, her friendship with Laura, and the budding romance between Laura and Brittas.

You can find the fic here.

Tropes in this fic:

• Adaptational Context Change:
  • The chapter covering the events of "Playing with Fire" still has Brittas tied up to a methane generator and hit at by Jenny, but the reasoning for this is changed - whereas in canon, this was because he was unwilling to remove Gavin from the timetable so that he and Jenny can go house-hunting, here it's because Brittas convinced Gavin to break up with Jenny, and she blames Brittas for this.
  • Like in canon, Michael T. Farrell III has become broke by the time of the Staff Gala in the fic's portrayal of "Shall We Dance?". However, whereas in canon, Michael became cut off following an argument with his father regarding the shoe industry, here, he loses the money due to his father copping on that Michael was no longer together with Laura and was scheming with Helen to try to convince him otherwise.
• Adaptational Jerkass:
  • Despite being set around Series 3 and 4, Ben is portrayed more in line with his Series 6 characterization as an Enfant Terrible rather than his Series 3 and 4 characterization as a toddler prone to Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour, but otherwise harmless, destroying several books off-screen and doing something with a lighter which barred his family from the local homeless shelters.
  • Downplayed, as Helen is at best a Heroic Comedic Sociopath in canon, but outside of her attempt to take Brittas off of life support in "Assassin", she normally isn't out to deliberately harm or hurt him as she eventually decides to do in this fic. Nor does she ever threaten the life of her best friend Laura. Nor is she ever implied to partake in the outright murder of animals (rats in this case) to use as a Dead Animal Warning. Justified by the fact that she's in a more precarious position, Brittas having found out about her affairs and her being forced to live with her mother as a result.
• Adaptational Relationship Overhaul: In canon, whilst Helen seems enamored with Michael and Michael is shown to be willing to get her out of sticky situations, their relationship goes no further than that. Here, they actually fall into a romantic relationship. At least for a little while.
• Adaptational Expansion:
  • Chapters 2 and 3 sheds a little more light on Laura's parents than we get in the show, revealing that they were rich, but wanted her to marry someone specific and were overbearing. Laura's marriage with Michael, the reasoning for it being also left unexplained in the show, was a subsequent attempt to break free from her parents, meant to highlight how she was an independent woman who had found love elsewhere, even if it did backfire on her.
  • Chapter 3 explains why Carole remains living in the leisure centre in spite of the implication that she does have other options available to her - apparently, her stepmother won't let her live in her house for any more than a week, her mother is now in a nursing home, and the homeless shelters won't take them in anymore after an unspecified Noodle Incident involving Ben and a lighter.
  • Chapter 4 provides an explanation for why Helen was recovering from a messy divorce when she first met Brittas - she had cheated on her last husband and produced a child behind his back. It also reveals just what she was kicked out of school for (she was found having sex with other students in a supply closet) and the outcome for her first marriage (apparently, her first husband cheated on her and dumped her).
  • Chapter 13 expands more about the photo of Helen seen in Plaything in "Biggles Tells a Lie", revealing that it came about as the result of a one-night stand that she had with a man named Gerald Williams in January 1989 in Christchurch. In fact, it's the fact that the photo was taken after her and Brittas had married which makes the latter finally realize that Helen had cheated on him.
  • Only the very end of Mr. Brittas' dinner with the people representing the British Representative on the European Leisure Industry Standards Committee is actually shown in "Mr Brittas Changes Trains", and what we do learn about it comes from Brittas and Laura's brief conversation afterwards. Here, we actually get to see a little more of it, as well as an explanation for why Laura would need to be explained certain details such as the fact that Brittas had successfully gotten the job at that point.
  • Ben's toy rabbit and electric chair seen in "The Last Day" were originally used in the show merely both as a sight gag and as a form of Toy-Based Characterization suggesting that Ben has a worryingly dark streak. Chapter 27 of this fic gives the toy a backstory, revealing that Carole found it at a Charity Shop and that the toy electric chair actually housed a toy Brittas at first. The toy Brittas ended up vanishing, forcing Carole to sub in one of Ben's toy bunnies when he proved inconsolable.
• Alternate Universe Fic: Branches off the night after the Series 3 episode “Sex, Lies and Red Tape” with Helen encountering Michael again and falling into a romantic relationship with him.
• Ascended Extra:
  • In canon, Brittas' stepchildren get very little attention and have little relevance to the plots. Here, they get more attention as they plot to leave Brittas with their mother and get more distinct personalities. It's especially notable with George Brittas, who stands out as being the only Brittas stepchild to neither receive a name or any individual moments in canon - here, he gets the most screentime out of the three stepchildren, courtesy of him being left at the airport and Brittas having to collect and watch over him, and he even gets some POV scenes in Chapter 8.
  • Whilst Michael's father is mentioned several times, he never appears in the flesh. Here, he shows up at a business dinner with Helen and Michael, and some attention is given on the relationship between Michael and his father.
• Bungled Hypnotism: Like in canon, Brittas is accidentally hypnotized, although here, it occurs as he's watching Mr. Silverman hypnotize a woman into a deeply relaxed state as part of the stage show rather than watching him hypnotize Helen to relax her for the dinner. Unlike in canon, Brittas' hypnotism doesn't go any further than simply being relaxed - whilst Laura does consider asking about it, she decides not to on the basis that, annoying as he is, he has just lost his wife and children, and screwing with his mind would be crossing a line.
• Call-Forward:
  • Brittas' Erotic Dream at the beginning of Chapter 17 ends with a goose swooping in and attacking him, referencing the later in canon episode "Curse of the Tiger Women" moment when the dream that Brittas had been having all series ended with him being attacked by a dying goose.
  • Chapter 17, which covers the events of the Series 4 episode "Playing with Fire", has Laura musing on Brittas' Made of Iron tendencies, ending with the view that "Really, he could have been crushed by a water tank and he still would have returned from the hospital within two months as fit as a fiddle.". The later Series 5 episode "The Last Day" and Series 6 episode "Back with a Bang" would see Brittas crushed by a water tank and end up returning from the hospital after two months being reconstructed, although he did also initially die as a result of the water tank, only being brought back because of his obnoxiousness.
  • After listening to Carole offer herself up as a Parental Substitute to George in Chapter 22, Laura expresses her concerns about Carole's ways of putting children in closed drawers and cupboards as a parenting style, fearing "how Mr. Brittas would react if said upbringing led to young children going around stabbing the customers because of their fear of the outside". The later set "High Noon" would reveal that Carole's son Ben keeps a knife with him, whilst Series 6 would feature him and his half-siblings taking a level in Jerkass, with Brittas considering Ben at least to have worryingly violent enough behaviour to prevent him from going anywhere near the general public and a Noodle Incident implicating Ben and the aforementioned knife in scaring off a busload of children.
• Convenient Photograph: Unlike in canon, the photo of Helen taken for Plaything becomes this - whilst Brittas was already beginning to suspect that his wife may have been leading a secret life away from him, the photograph provides his first solid lead, as he's able to determine that the photo was taken after Helen and Brittas had married.
• Crossing the Burnt Bridge: When Helen falls into a relationship with Michael, she leaves Brittas behind his back and admits to him when he manages to locate her seeking for answers that she was cheating on him since the day she met him, understandably upsetting him. When Helen is subsequently dumped by Michael and is forced to live with her mother, she takes the opportunity to go back to Brittas, hoping that his trusting and loyal nature would allow him to take her back. Needless to say that Brittas is too hurt by the revelations to entertain the possibility.
• Dead Animal Warning: It's clearly a sign of Helen's Sanity Slippage that she sees fit to send Brittas several bags of rat corpses drenched in pools of blood, alongside a letter threatening to both send Brittas into bankruptcy and outright murder Laura.
• Discontinuity Nod: After telling Michael to shove it, Laura has the thought that "Perhaps, in another universe, she would have felt pity, allowed him back into her arms and they ended up achieving their dreams, her now the mother of a baby, him his fortune, and both never having to work again.", which is indeed what happened in canon. Laura then immediately dismisses it, since she could never see Michael improving enough to provide the opportunity.
• Distinguishing Mark: Brittas discovers that the photo of Helen in Plaything was in fact taken after they had married based on the fact that she has a scar on her lower stomach, one which he recognizes wasn't made until after an unspecified Noodle Incident involving a lawnmower on their honeymoon.
• Erotic Dream:
  • Laura has a romantic dream at the end of Chapter 16 where Brittas kisses her after telling her that he was not bothered by her being late. It's noted that whilst she usually has dreams where Brittas would be a kinder man, this was the first one where they actually kissed, a hint at her growing feelings for him.
  • Brittas gets one such dream himself at the beginning of Chapter 17, where Laura casually admits that she loves him before kissing him. Considering his current issues regarding Helen, this leaves him very conflicted.
• Heroic BSoD: Brittas takes Helen leaving him very poorly, losing his motivations for rules and regulations and largely staying in his office. He begins slowly going back to normal after going on a sailing trip... until he discovers that Helen has not been as faithful in their marriage as he thought she had been.
• I Need a Freaking Drink: Brittas' and Laura's reaction to discovering that their respective spouses had been cheating on them with each other is to pull out the wine.
• In Spite of a Nail: In spite of the canon-divergent event of Helen falling in love with Michael and actually running off with him, some events still play out the same.
  • The events of "The Stuff of Dreams", "Not a Good Day...", and "The Christening" play out the exact same way as in canon.
  • In "Biggles Tells a Lie", Brittas still goes out on a sailing trip, Stephanie still shows up at the centre, and the staff still come across the Plaything magazine featuring Helen, although unlike in canon, Brittas doesn't show up at the centre to disrupt the staff's attempt to Maintain the Lie regarding Colin being a Leisure Centre Manager and what the staff does with the Plaything magazine plays out entirely differently.
  • For "Mr. Brittas Changes Trains", the staff still go to a hypnotist show, Brittas still gets hypnotized, and Brittas still takes Laura to dinner to impress those seeking to make him the British Representative on the European Leisure Industry Standards Committee, although the outcome of Brittas' hypnosis and how this impacts the dinner is somewhat different from canon.
  • "Playing with Fire" has surprisingly minimal changes, courtesy of Helen already being absent from the episode in canon. The major difference is that unlike in canon, Brittas notices Gavin's discomfort with seeing Jenny and confronts him, leading to Brittas suggesting to Gavin to break things with her off-screen. The scene where Laura tells Brittas that he can come over and have dinner with her also changes location from the weights room to Brittas' house.
  • For "Shall We Dance?", the staff gala still goes ahead, Brittas still asks Laura to dance with him, and Michael still appears at the centre to try to win Laura back, although the outcome of the latter two events is drastically different.
• Internal Reveal:
  • Brittas finally figures out in Chapter 13 that Helen has been cheating on him, although the audience knew since the third episode in canon of her cheating ways.
  • Brittas learns from Helen in Chapter 29 that he had fathered illegitimate children and gets confirmation from Laura the chapter after that he is the father of Jessica and Emily, although the audience had known this since "Temple of the Body" in canon.
• Invented Invalid: Like in canon, Helen makes up a sick relative to get away from Brittas, this time pretending to have a sick cousin called Trevor. Unlike in canon, where "Uncle" Simon really did exist (albeit unrelated to Helen and not sick), there is no indication that Trevor actually exists, Helen using it as a cover to continue her relationship with Michael.
• Like Parent, Like Child: Whilst canon had hinted that Jonathan has issues doing schoolwork like his mother, this fic goes a bit further, showing him to have a thing for alcohol like his mother and being implied to have a thing for people of the opposite gender on a romantic basis.
• Meet Cute: Helen's canon first meeting with Michael, where he removes the bow from her hair to help decrease her chances of being recognised by the police, is recontextualized as this. However, another moment comes when Helen first meets Michael at Parrot's Bar, where she spills wine over herself and Michael helps clean her up.
• Mocking Music: After Brittas learns that his wife has been cheating on him all along, he tries to distract himself by putting on a radio station to try to distract his thoughts on the way home. Unfortunately for him, the tune that plays is "Our Last Song Together" by Neil Sedaka. Even worse, when Brittas takes a closer look, he realizes that he had accidentally played the ''Best of Neil Sedaka" tape he had gifted Helen back in "An Inspector Calls", prompting a memory about how Helen had always preferred the sadder tunes about one-night stands and solitaries on the tape, due to the fact that they summed up her hopes and dreams. The result is that it causes him to realize that all that Helen wanted to do was to get away from him, making him struggle to not cry on the way home.
• My God, What Have I Done?: Helen has this reaction after being dumped by Michael, realising that she had been unappreciative of her husband and had been using him. This lasts until Brittas tells her that he doesn't intend to take her back, at which point, she gets it in her head that Laura is the actual one at fault and begins severely downplaying her role in the collapse of her marriage.
• Named by the Adaptation:
  • Like in the author's previous fic, Helen's second oldest son, who is unnamed in the show, is called George.
  • Whilst Helen's previous husbands are never given any names in canon (barring her accidental marriage to Harry Johnson), Chapter 6 names the second one Rory and Chapter 24 names the first one Jonathan, giving Brittas' oldest stepchild an Ancestral Name.
  • Only two (Klaus and Sophie) of the four people meeting Brittas for dinner regarding his potential role as British Representative on the European Leisure Industry Standards Committee in "Mr Brittas Changes Trains" are actually named. Here, the other two are named Arthur Miller and Mr. Wagner.
  • Whilst Helen's maiden name was never given in canon, Chapter 20 has it as Wilson.
• One-Night-Stand Pregnancy: According to Chapter 4, Tom Brittas was the by-product of a one-night stand between Helen and an unknown man. Unfortunately for Helen, her previous husband found out and divorced her.
• O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Discovering that Helen has left her causes Brittas to lose a lot of energy in his desire to both implement rules and regulations. Whilst Laura notices this sudden change in mood the morning after Brittas learns of this, she only checks up on him after an entire morning passes in which nothing remarkable happens in the centre, which considering Brittas' status as a Doom Magnet due to his personality, would suggest that there is something heavily wrong with him.
• Parental Title Characterization:
  • Unlike his siblings, George notably refers to Helen as "Mum" and Brittas as "Daddy", hinting at the fact that he's the stepchild with the most disinterest for his mother and the most love for his stepfather.
  • Helen calls her unnamed mother just "Mother", highlighting their frosty relationship and showcasing said mother's formal, posh ways.
• Parent with New Paramour: Chapter 6 features a scene where Helen explains to her older children about her plans to leave their stepfather. The three have slightly different reactions - Jonathan, having been Conditioned to Accept Horror on the topic of his mother's affairs, was apparently running a bet with George on the matter and Tom is more interested in the idea that it will get him more toys. George is the only one to have doubts, as he actually likes Brittas and prefers him to his biological father. However, Chapter 24 suggests that in spite of Jonathan's attitude towards his stepfather, he does appreciate him for being there where his biological father wasn't.
• Parental Neglect: Helen's canon habit of losing her children gets more attention here, culminating in her leaving her son George at the airport.
  Helen: I’m desperate here, Gordon. I’m living with my mother. It’s not a good environment for the four children.
  Mr. Brittas: Five, Helen. We’ve got five.
  Helen: See, it’s even worse than I thought – more children to suffer under her.
• "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Laura gives one to Michael after he suggests to her that she was at fault for bringing him to the arms of Helen.
  Laura: Michael, I doubt this will get through to you because it sure didn’t the last 100 times you tried to win me back, but you were a crap husband, who couldn’t even remember my birthday and who only ever saw me as a disposable object, a container for the future heir of the Farrell empire. You lie, cheat, and think that money can get you whatever you want. Your charmer ways may have worked on me before, but now that I know the true image under the exterior, I don’t think it ever will again.
• Relatively Flimsy Excuse: Michael attempts to pass off Helen's twin sons with Brittas as being the children of Laura and him so that he can get the money from his father's will. Despite fears that the twins' large nostrils (a trait inherited from their actual father) would give their identity away, it seems to work... until Chapter 17 reveals that Michael's father wasn't fooled.
• Rich Bastard: Michael's father is revealed to be just as much of a jerk as his son can be in canon, calling Helen's twins "ugly" and denouncing them as "clearly inferior stock". With this in mind, it's no wonder that Helen gives him a No-Holds-Barred Beatdown.
• Spared by the Adaptation: Played With - in the original, whilst it's never outright stated that Ronald Sudbury died, he's implied to have met his end in the ventilation systems of the centre at the end of "Shall We Dance?". Here, the incident which led to Ronald going into the vents, namely Brittas throwing his engagement ring into the suggestion box, never happens, and Ronald is able to reunite with Carole safe and well.
• Switching P.O.V.: The POV varies from chapter to chapter and even from scene to scene. Brittas, Laura, and Helen get the most POV screentime, but other characters, such as George, Julie and Carole, have managed to get a scene or two from their POV.
• Taking the Kids: Helen tries to take the children with her when she decides to move in with Michael. Whilst she manages to get the majority of them out of the country, she ends up leaving George behind, leading to George living with Brittas. Once the divorce proceeding finally gets underway, Helen, out of anger, decides to fight for full custody of the children, believing that Brittas and Laura would corrupt the children.
• Troubling Unchildlike Behaviour: Jonathan Brittas is caught purchasing alcohol at the airport in spite of the fact that he's only 13. Helen doesn't seem to mind this, considering his chaotic life growing up with Brittas.
• Two-Timing with the Bestie: Played With, as Helen's best friend Laura is currently estranged from her husband, but Helen pursues a relationship with Laura's husband Michael anyway. Notably, even Helen realizes the oddness of having an affair with her friend's husband and chooses not to initially reveal it to her, and it's only when Brittas figures it out that she learns the truth.
• Unseen No More:
  • Michael's father, mentioned a lot by Michael in his appearances but never seen in canon, makes a physical appearance in Chapter 5.
  • In canon, Mrs. Bastible was only mentioned once as being the woman who watched over Helen's children whilst the latter prepared for her wedding in "Back from the Dead", and never makes any appearances in the flesh. Here, she makes a quick physical appearance in Chapter 13, having watched over George whilst Brittas both goes sailing and sorts out George's return to school in the UK.
  • Helen's mother is mentioned several times in canon, but never actually appears in the flesh. In this fic, she eventually shows up in Chapter 20, Helen being forced to move in with her in the wake of the collapse of her affair with Michael.
• What Did I Do Last Night?: When Helen decides to go back to Brittas in Chapter 21, she finds the house empty. Impatient with waiting for him (and unaware that he's decided to stay with Laura for a while), Helen decides to pull out a stash of beer kept in the fridge. In the next chapter, Helen ends up waking to a living room somehow containing several puddles of vomit, a large crack in the TV, cigarette burns and scorch marks on the walls, a torn apart couch, shards of glass in the sink, and something in the fridge which makes Helen conclude that it needed to be thrown out.
• Woman Scorned: Helen eventually gets it into her head that Laura is somehow responsible for taking Brittas away from her and sends Brittas a Dead Animal Warning and letter threatening to kill Laura.

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