Describe Hagrid and the Skoolgurlz here.

[[CrackFic How?]]

[[ Hagrid and the Skoolgurlz]] is a strange ''Franchise/HarryPotter'' fan fiction story about Hagrid and his heavy metal band. Once Grawp dies of a tumor, Hagrid fulfills his last wish by forming a heavy metal band with Ron, Luna, Hermione, Aragog, Dumbledore, and [=McGonagall.=] The band then does around the world using their [[Literature/MagicSchoolBus Magic Tour Bus]] and... destroy every town they go to.

And while they are gone, Hogwarts has a [[ZombieApocalypse slight problem]] that Harry, Malfoy, and Cho Chang need to take care of.

!!This work provides examples of:

* ADateWithRosiePalms: Neville finds a closet filled with Playboys when he, Harry, Draco, and Cho are searching for weapons to fight the zombies. He enters and never leaves.
* ArtifactTitle: Even though his name is in the title, Hagrid seems to have the least screen time devoted to him. [[JustifiedTrope Justified]] as the title is ''the band's'' name.
* BestialityIsDepraved: This exchange, shortly after the zombies invade the school.
-->'''Draco:''' Dammit Harry! How did this happen!
-->'''Harry:''' Hey, Neville did it! He was the one that called that zombie sex line!
-->'''[[ExtremeOmnisexual Neville]]:''' But I thought it said "zebra" sex line!
-->'''Cho:''' That doesn't make it better!
* ButtMonkey: Ron, big time.
-->'''Luna:''' ''(after landing in Paris)'' Weren't we going to Darfur?
-->'''Hagrid:''' Shut up, Ron!
-->'''Ron:''' But I didn't...!
* CheeseEatingSurrenderMonkeys: Hagrid calls them this when they go to Paris.
* CrackFic
* CloudCuckoolander: Dumbledore, Luna, and sometimes Hagrid.
* EatsBabies: Aragog. He joins the band "for the bite-sized children."
* GagBoobs: Hermione's can eat people. And talk.
* GratuitousJapanese: At [[MarySue Sailor Earth's]] request, Voldemort sings a love song, "with a lot of Japanese words".
* {{Irony}}: [[MyImmortal Ebony's]] flyer misspells "Hagrid and the Skoolgurlz" by spelling "schoolgirls" correctly.
* KatanasAreJustBetter:
-->Cho grabbed a crossbow, a Magnum Pistol, and a katana, because ''katanas are just better''
* MarySue: In universe. The band visits a place called Fanfic, California, full of all kinds of Mary Sues, including [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Bella Swan]]. Voldemort then forms a band, called Midnight Xtasy. Each member introduces themself by stating what type of Sue they are. The band consists of Voldemort, [[CopyCatSue Sailor Earth]], [[FixerSue Peggy Shipper]], [[PuritySue Lapis Lazuli]], [[SympatheticSue Madison Misery]], [[JerkSue Nocturne Langley]] and [[GodModeSue Leon Goldborn]].
** ThirtySuePileup: Mentioned by name.
* NoIndoorVoice: Hargid in particular, but there is much screamed dialogue in this fic.
* NoFourthWall
* {{Oireland}}: Every stereotype imaginable is used. [[spoiler: And then it explodes.]]
* PutOnABus: [[spoiler: [=McGonagall=]. Literally.]]
* RacistGrandma: [=McGonagall=]. The writers acknowledge ([[AuthorFilibuster in-story]]) that she has a lot of depth in the novels, but they thought it would be more fun to write her as a jerk/racist. [[spoiler:Later, she is forced to become the new [[Literature/MagicSchoolBus Mrs. Frizzle]]... for a group of elementary-age black children.]]
* RefugeInAudacity: At one of its tamer moments, [[spoiler: Snape takes advantage of the zombie outbreak by [[ILoveTheDead getting it on with a zombified Lily]].]]
* RelaxOVision: "Aragog had to make an example of Ron. Use your imagination, because if I said what he did, I would be banned from every nook and cranny on the internet. Yes, even /b/."
* RememberTheNewGuy: Apparently, [[spoiler: Dobby]] was in the band since day one. [[spoiler:But no one really cares when he dies.]]
* RunningGag: People mistaking Aragog for various bugs and crabs.
** Also, Ron's rabies. [[spoiler: Aragog gets sick of the joke and sucks the rabies out of him.]]
* ShoutOut: Several, mostly to bad fanfiction and MyImmortal.
** Luna steals two boys from a NAMBLA meeting. Their names are [[KingdomHearts Sora and Riku]].
** Draco says they should go to [[Theatre/AVeryPotterMusical Pigfarts]] to escape the zombies. Harry scoffs at the idea...[[spoiler: and then kills [[TheGirlWhoLived Rose Potter]].]]
* ThePowerOfRock: Can turn boys into men. [[spoiler:This is what ruins NAMBLA.]]
* UnexplainedRecovery: The random Irish man. [[spoiler:He later dies with the rest of Ireland.]]
** Also Ron, after Aragog "makes an example" of him.
* YaoiFangirl: Luna
** YaoiGuys: Sora and Riku, Luna's "Yaoi Pets".
* ZombieApocalypse