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Drinking Game: Eurovision Song Contest
Rules for Eurovision Song Contest drinking game:

  • When the scores start to come in, someone has to call out which country they think will get 12 points from the current one; if correct, everyone including the caller takes a shot.
  • Should you wish to get the drinking started during the songs themselves, we have devised a foolproof selection for you to try.
    • Drink whenever there is a key or tempo change
    • Drink whenever there is a use of pyrotechnics/wind machine
    • Drink whenever there is someone on stage of questionable gender.

Alternate rules from Finnish magazine City:
  • Whenever a song contains more than one language, take a sip.
    • If one of those languages is pronounced badly by the singer, take another sip for every badly pronounced language.
  • Whenever a song is about world peace or friendship that unites nations, take a sip. (f.ex. Israel's There Must Be Another Way from 2009, Georgia's Peace Will Come from 2008.)
  • If the song panders to the gay audience, take a sip.
    • If the song could end up in a drag queen's performance repertoire, take another sip. (Sweden's Invincible from 2006.)
  • If the song is a joke or a "protest", take a sip.
    • If you're not sure, take a sip anyway.
  • If the song is a copy of last year's winning song, take a sip.
    • If the song resembles ABBA, take an additional sip.
  • If the song's title does not have actual words in it, take a sip. (Sweden's Diggi-loo, Diggi-ley from 1984, the Netherlands' Ding dinge dong from 1975.)
  • If the performer changes outfits during the performance, take a sip. (Things like tearing away part of a dress or growing wings like Lordi in 2006 count.)
  • If the last chorus goes up a key, take a sip.
  • If the performer has a mustache or manly stubble, take a sip.
    • Take an additional sip if said performer is a woman.
  • If the dancers are in national costume, take a sip.
    • If the performance resembles a tourism ad, take an additional sip. (Moldova's "Hora Din Moldova from 2009.)
  • If the song contains an "ethnic" instrument, take a sip. Accordion and pan flute count as ethnic instruments.
  • If the performance contains excessive amounts of wind machine use, take a sip. (Sweden's Invincible and Albania's Zemren E Lame Peng from 2006, Azerbaijan's Always and Croatia's Lijepa Tena from 2009.)
  • If the female singer's eyebrows are noticeably darker than her hair, take a sip.
  • If the singer has whitened teeth, take a sip.
  • Whenever the hosts have changed outfits between performances, take a sip.
  • If Ireland performs a ballad, take a sip.
  • If Malta performs a power ballad, take a sip. (The One That I Love from 1998, Angel from 2005, What If We from 2009.)
  • If a song from a country that was formerly part of Yugoslavia is melancholy, take a sip.
  • If a song from a country in the Balkans contains the word "Balkan", take a sip. (Macedonia's Mojot Svet from 2007, Romania's The Balkan Girls from 2009, Serbia's Ovo Je Balkan from 2010.)
  • If a Greek male performer or dancer shows off large amounts of pectoral muscle, take a sip. (Shake It from 2004, My Number One from 2005, This Is Our Night from 2009, Opa! from 2010...)
    • If said Greek performer or dancer has massive chest hair, take another sip.
  • If a country gives another country 12 points for geographical or political reasons, take a sip.

Additional Rules by the British:
  • If you're fairly confident the song is in English but can't understand a thing, drink until you can.
    • If you're not sure, do it anyway.
  • If a country's "postcard" is cringeworthy and/or your national commentator says yours is so much better, take a sip.
  • Drink every time you see your country's flag.
  • Take a sip for every point the United Kingdom get.
    • Or Azerbaijan, if you actually want a drink.
    • Or for how many places you are above UK or below Azerbaijan.
    • How many places the UK are above Germany (and France).
  • A sip for every terrible joke and/or allusion to host country's failure/success.
  • Drink whenever The War is strategically avoided being mentioned (you will notice when this happens).
  • If you can guess who Spain and Moldova will give points to, everyone else drinks.
  • Sip whenever you notice the British really aren't taking this whole thing seriously.
    • Down the thing if the hosts notice the British aren't taking it seriously.
  • Sip when Russia, Ukraine, Georgia, and Belarus give each other top points.
    • Or when they don't, if you plan to re-watch 2014's.
    • When Norway, Sweden, Denmark, Iceland, and Holland give each other top points.
  • Drink when someone (including in the room with you) boos at who gets points.
  • Sip for each song more reliant on performance than song.
    • And each song that sounds weirdly familiar.
    • And each that puts a kid in the room to sleep.
  • Finish your drink if you hate the song that's favourite to win.
    • And again if it wins.
    • Or if you hate the song which wins.
  • Celebratory drinks if your country wins.
    • Congratulatory drinks if the UK wins!
  • A country ends with nil points.
    • Twice if it's not France/Spain/UK.
  • Sip each time you think a country's giving top points to UK, but they're saying 'Ukraine'.
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