So you may have noticed I haven't been updating this blog lately. Well, the pastor at the church I work at suggested "give up something bad for Lent," as in, give up a bad habit you have. So, I decided that for Lent this year, I'd give up making fun of Fallout: Equestria. So I'll be postponing my reading and riffing on that until Easter, which is
March 31st? Fuck. Well, let's see if I can commit to an entire month. Man, I am never gonna make a New Years' resolution.
So that has left me with a bit of pause on what to do yet. I could continue My Second Life, but that isn't the sort of thing I can read on my own. The Unexpected Love Life of Dusk Shine has finally started updating again, but I'm not quite caught up there.
But this whole thing started with Fallout: Equestria. Why not look at one of the sidefics? Well, technically I already did look at one terrible sidefic, but I took down the update because I felt uncomfortable devoting an update to rape porn (no, seriously). Then there's one infamous fic titled Project Human, which has something of an infamous status in the FOE fandom for being the worst thing that exists. And in an interesting twist of fate, the folks on /mlp/ have taken a very heavy disliking towards Project Horizons, the biggest and most well-known story. However, neither of those appear to be taken lightly. Project Human is apparently so batshit crazy that I'd need to be very well-prepared before entering it. And Project Horizons is not only fucking long, but, well... it's written by a guy suffering from depression, I'd just feel bad making fun of that.
However, not to worry, because I have, in fact, been reading a side story by the title Murky Number Seven. What is it about? Well, it's set in Fillydelphia and focuses on Red Eye's slaving operation from the perspective of a slave named Murky.
Now, first off, let's note the similarities with the original fic. The story is told in first-person past-tense (yet following the character's thoughts in the sort of pseudo-stream-of-consciousness that allows for odd interjections that you'd think would be more suited for present-tense), which allows for tons and tons of angst. Furthermore, we have a similar format - every chapter opens with a quote from either the games or the show (though thus far this story seems to have more quotes from the show), and every chapter ends with the character "leveling up" and getting a perk. Also, you know how every chapter of the original story starts with a one-word sentence? Well, this one starts every chapter with a question! In quotation marks... I bet at the end of the story it's revealed that this is an interview with DJ Pon-3.
So, let's start with our protagonist: Murky Number Seven. To start off, I must say I've never seen a character more tailored to wring sympathy from the audience. Let's count the ways:
He's born as a slave, his cutie mark is a pair of manacles (I notice that they're open manacles, though...) and slavery is completely ingrained into his psyche, so he pretty much just instinctually does whatever he's told because he's just conditioned to obey. He's also a runt, and he's so far at the bottom of the pecking order that even other slaves bully him or otherwise take advantage of him. Also, due to his upbringing, he is illiterate. He was also taken away from his mother, who he misses a lot, and he's generally miserable a lot of the time. He's been bought and sold countless times for paltry sums, and his owners invariably hate him because he's generally seen as useless. And if that weren't enough, at the beginning of the story he's slated to fight in the Pit, which is pretty much a death sentence for him. He's also in the FunFarm and has developed a hearty dislike for Pinkie Pie.
Because you see, while most characters in these stories are badasses who use their guns like fifth limbs, Murky is a decidedly Non-Action Guy, and would be more at home with a cup of hot cocoa and a cuddle followed by his mother reading him a bedtime story. Also, several teddy bears. I mean, seriously, just look
◊ at the guy.
Murky, as we'll find out, is not a combat-oriented character, often needing to get by on his wits or his ability to sneak and steal. As a fan of the Thief series, this appeals to me a great deal.
So in the first chapter we're introduced to a few characters - Murky, some minor bullies who mock him for being about to die in the Pit, and two of Murky's slaver overlords. There are actually a number of slaver overlords in the fic, each with their own colorful personality. First there's Whiplash, who's your fairly garden-variety gruff, cruel work-driver. Then there's Wicked Slit, who can best be summed up with the word "Psychobitch." And just because Murky has to go fight in the Pit does not mean that he gets the day off, so Whiplash and Wicked Slit have him doing labor.
Now, Murky's life, as is quickly established, sucks. His only solace is his journal. He doesn't write anything in it, but he does draw. We first see it when the bullies are taunting him for his impending death, and he takes it out and draws a picture of himself dead in the arena...
It's really quite heartbreaking. No, this is not a very happy story.
Mainly in his journal he draws two things: First, he draws details from his daily life, like himself pulling carts and stuff. Second... mares. He draws pictures of mares. He likes mares. He likes them a lot.
So, while he's out doing work, he bumps into another mare who sees the journal, and she plants an idea in his head when she says it must be nice to be able to draw whatever you chose. And that hits Murky, because choice is something that has never occurred to him. So, when he gets back to his pen in the FunFarm, he draws something he wants to draw. His mother.
And then he's pulled off to the Pit and put onto a team for the bloody gladiatorial games. On his team is a big red pony that's one of the other main characters. His name's Brimstone Blitz. This isn't revealed for another several chapters, but fuck it, his name's Brimstone Blitz. Also on his team is...
Yes. I don't even need to say it. It's just yes.
But anyway, yeah. Fighting happens, Stable Dweller goes up against that boring zebra, and Murky watches in awe as she flies away without wings.
Then the big riot breaks out. Murky follows Brimstone, who makes a break for it (and reveals quite a streak of ruthless brutality), but he gets lost. He tries to get back to his pen, but the FunFarm is in shambles. The bullies from the beginning of the chapter try to murder him, but they get scared off by Pyrelight.
Murky finds a busted PipBuck and is then able to listen to DJ Pon-3's speeches and Velvet Remedy's songs and decides that he's going to try to fight for his freedom. And yes, there is a fair amount of Murky being incredibly inspired by these folks.
But you know, I actually really like this story. It's got a great cast of characters, including a very likable trio of leads with a protagonist I really just want to give a hug to, a colorful roster of villains, and I find it has very good dialogue and prose (the odd typo here and there aside). This chapters are pretty big, averaging at about 30k apiece, and part of this does have to do with the narration kinda just going on and on (every chapter seems to start with a page or so of Murky just reiterating what it's like to be a slave in response to every chapter question), but somehow Murky's angst never really bothers me, because it does in fact get around to the really good stuff fairly quickly.
And, yeah. Something related to Fallout: Equestria I actually like. I think that's most of the stuff from the first chapter... should've done this after reading the first thing. I'm on chapter ten and it's gonna be a pain in the ass remembering all the details.
The funniest part is I haven't even gotten to two other important factors in making Murky miserable: racism and terminal illness!
Comments
