Live Blogs You're only reading this because I rated the game 3/10! Let's read horrible GameFAQs reviews!

Ephraim2252011-04-19 00:10:18

Game FA Qs is perhaps one of the most informative Video Game websites known to man. Created in 1995, the site is a database of video game information, nearly all of which is submitted by volunteer contributors. You can find just about anything you'd want to know about any given game: walkthroughs, maps, cheats, secrets, release dates, box art, reviews...

Haha reviews

Game FA Qs is already notorious for its many Fora, the userbase of which is known to consist primarily of Trolls, idiots, console soldiers, and people too lazy to read the FAQs the damn site is named for. But that wouldn't be enough, for there is a second cesspit of hatred and lies on this otherwise awesome website - the reviews section, where users are allowed to give their opinions on a given game or system.

Maybe you've come across that one review on that one game, and something seems a little off. That is, you can't understand where the reviewer is coming from, or his spelling sucks, or maybe he didn't even play the damn game. I, Ephraim225, am here to expose the worst, most incomprehensible, unreadable, and possibly painful Game FA Qs reviews you have ever had the misfortune of hearing about.

Now, don't get me wrong, we all have opinions. Mine might be different, that's just life etc. etc....but hear me out. I've seen Game FA Qs users write good reviews before. I've seen reviews that I don't agree with but are well-written. We're here to find the reviews that will make you let out a Flat "What", among other unexpected expected reactions.

Let's read horrible Game FA Qs reviews.

Comments

GIG Since: Dec, 1969

Jun 12th 2011 at 11:14:00 PM

So, did he talk about the Wii itself at all? Because my eyes glazed over once he started talking about everything else.

SomeColorMage Since: Dec, 1969

Jun 12th 2011 at 11:34:57 PM

GIG: Well, he said the system is great a couple of times, and I think there was some comment about the controller somewhere, but 99% of it is bitching about the games and something to do with copying things, I kinda tuned out after a while too.

I think I've figured out why there are so many bad reviews on GameFAQs, there is simply not enough money in the world to pay people to willingly moderate this stuff.

Emperordaein Since: Dec, 1969

Jun 13th 2011 at 3:04:40 AM

FUN FACT! In the magazine N Gamer, they had images of the Development offices for the Smash Bros Brawl Dev Team, which was in the process of being cleared out. One notable thing was the boxes upon boxes of Gamecube controllers. It seems even the Devs liked the Gamecube controller best.

I guess you would buy the original Metal Slug if you didn't want to pay full price for Anthology. Or just wanted the first. Like me on both counts.

"The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, but the controls are too confusing"

......

• Emperordaein's brain has left the building*

Korval Since: Dec, 1969

Jun 13th 2011 at 6:44:44 PM

"Oh lord do not get me started on Smash Bros. I'm saving that for the inevitable Game FA Qs SSBB review."

Oh please let it be by some Stop Having Fun Guys. Please!

Korval Since: Dec, 1969

Jun 14th 2011 at 10:51:27 PM

"Oh...hang on a sec...yep, approximately one month after this review was posted, Majora's Mask came out on the VC in the US."

The part that gets me is that he assumed that MM wasn't going to come out. There was a time when OoT wasn't out on VC either. And when the original Zelda wasn't out. And so on.

Did he think that Nintendo was just going to stop selling us their old games?