History Webcomic / CinemaSnobReviewsFrozen

''WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob'' is told there is an exploitation film called ''Elsa, Snow Queen of Arendelle'', and instantly knows it's really ''{{Disney/Frozen}}''. Being well past his cutoff date would make it ineligible for review, but since he would get to watch a good movie, he goes ahead anyway in his typical style (which means this comic is NotSafeForWork).

** ''Disney/SnowWhiteAndTheSevenDwarfs'': The opening scene shows us what the dwarfs do in the off-season.

[[caption-width-right:350:Yeah, it's not as though he was asked to review one of the DirectToVideo Disney sequels.]]

-->-- '''The Cinema Snob''' (commenting on "Let It Go")

''WebVideo/TheCinemaSnob'' is told there is an exploitation film called ''Elsa, Snow Queen of Arendelle'', and Snob instantly knows it's really ''{{Disney/Frozen}}''. Being well past his cutoff date would make it ineligible for review, but since he would get to watch a good movie, he goes ahead anyway in his typical style (which means this comic is NotSafeForWork).

-->'''Elsa''': "I never knew what I was capable of."
-->'''Snob''': "Yeah, neither did the script."

* TheCameo: Oancitizen of ''WebVideo/BrowsHeldHigh'' appears at the end of the review to discuss the animation style of ''Animation/{{The Snow Queen|1957}}'' (1957), but Snob just snaps at him that the review is over.
* DamnedByFaintPraise: Despite ''Film/{{Dogs}}'' being a bad movie, Snob still thinks it's a step up from a zombie confederate movie.

* FridgeBrilliance: InUniverse. After noting that Elsa's palace had different colors on the ice, Snob assumes Elsa could just make ice based food like ice cream and slushies. "That would certainly answer what she'd eat here."

* IfIWantedXIWouldY: Fitting his MadLibsCatchPhrase, he talks about Hans and then says "I'll stick with real bland pretty boys, like ''Gayracula'', thank you very much".

* NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer: After noting an out of universe explanation for actions in ''Film/ManOfSteel'', Snob says "You think I'm joking?". Then there is a screencap and a url to an article where the film's director outright gives that explanation.

-->'''Snob''': "Crap! (Sven) fell in the lake! [[ButtonMashing Mash X! Mash X!]]"

* RequiredSecondaryPowers: Since Elsa finds "The cold never bothered me anyway," Snob is disappointed that this means her nipples wouldn't be hardened by her dress, even if it was made out of ice.

-->'''Snob''': "Turns out I'd be an asshole!"

** ''Disney/SnowWhiteAndTheSevenDwarfs'': The opening scene shows us what the dwarfs do in the off season.
** ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'': When mentioning Creator/IdinaMenzel's role in ''{{Theatre/Wicked}}'', he said she played an Orion slave girl.
** ''Film/SilentNightDeadlyNight'': Snob says Elsa's accident with Anna is still safer than sledding in the woods at night, and then we see the clip of the sled decapitation scene.

** ''{{Film/Tron}}'': Compared the ice trail young Elsa leaves from the horse to the light cycles.
** ''WesternAnimation/ChallengeOfTheGoBots'': Initially thinks the trolls are the Rock Lords, and wonders if they're going to have another crossover with the Go Bots.
** ''{{Creator/Pixar}}'': Snob only likes it when animated films by this studio try to make him cry.

** ''{{Film/Snowpiercer}}'': Kristoff's sled is a less effective prototype to that train.

** ''{{Music/Darkthrone}}'': He mentions the Norwegian BlackMetal group is in Arendelle castle, taking requests.
** ''{{Series/Newhart}}'': Compares Weselton and his lackeys to Larry, Darryl, and Darryl.

** ''{{Film/Heartbeeps}}'': When Anna compliments Elsa's new look, Snob says Anna would say that even if Elsa looked ridiculous, like the female lead's getup in ''Heartbeeps''.

** Creator/BradJones's Vlogs: Compares the snow slide down the mountain to a water slide Brad and his friends call the "ass bleeder".

** ''Film/NationalLampoonsChristmasVacation'' Olaf is snow surfing thanks to the new and improved kitchen lubricant.
** Snob's review of ''Film/SleepawayCamp'': When Hans says his infamous WhamLine, Snob says "Why yes, Everyone. That's a dick."
** ''Series/GameOfThrones'': Of course compares Hans's actions to this series.

** ''Film/TheDevilWithHitler'': After Snob realizes that Hans's actions would mean Elsa would feel the pain of thinking she killed Anna ''twice'', Snob says Hans should be in line to take over Satan's job.

** ''{{Music/Enigma}}'': Compares the chanting in ''Frozen'' to the chanting in "Return to Innocence".
** Franchise/{{Batman}}: When Elsa shoots a gigantic snowflake crystal into the sky for everyone to see, Snob calls it her version of the Bat Signal.

-->'''Brad''': "But seriously. FUCK. YOU."
* SuspiciouslySpecificDenial: Snob says he doesn't identify with Elsa's "Don't let them in, don't let them see" line at all. DescriptionCut to a blu-ray of ''Film/WeekendAtBernies''.
-->'''Snob''': "Don't let them see. Don't let them see. They must never know."
* TakeThat: Several times Snob notes that this movie keeps reminding him of bad movies, but makes even more glad he's watching this one. As for more specific examples:

** ''Film/ManOfSteel'': Several are made, from stating the peasants shouldn't react to Elsa's powers but should should stand around looking bored (cut to a shot of the extras in the finale of ''Man of Steel''), to claiming that ''Frozen'' is a better ''{{Franchise/Superman}}'' movie than ''Man of Steel''... and that even ''Film/SaloOrThe120DaysOfSodom'' is a better Superman movie[[note]][[http://channelawesome.com/forums/threads/ask-the-cinema-snob.13960/page-126#post-927208 that last one came from Brad himself]][[/note]].
** ''Film/TheDayAfterTomorrow'': Snob claims ''Frozen'' is more plausible, even though it's a fantasy movie. He also takes a later stab at how ''Frozen's'' climax is done better despite the similarities.

** [[NeverTrustATrailer The trailers]] for ''Frozen'': When Elsa looks at her hands, Snob says they can do anything, "even turn a shitty trailer with a reindeer and a snowman into Disney's best animated film in decades!".

** (Elsa wakes up) "Oh, what a nightmare, I dreamed ''Film/ThatsMyBoy'' made more money than ''Film/{{Titanic|1997}}''",

* WetTShirtContest: Well a skirt in this case. After Anna falls in a river and her dress is soaked below the waist, Snob notes she could have entered a wet petticoat contest.

** He thinks Anna is going to stick the carrot on an inappropriate place on Olaf. After Snob's relieved Anna just used it to make a nose, he then reminds himself that "this is a Disney film. They aren't gonna' start fucking".

** Doesn't like the film using {{Slapstick}} humor, because the film's jokes should be "exactly like a seventies ''Creator/WoodyAllen'' film".

** ''Film/StageFright'': Snob compares "In Summer" to a teen wondering what it would be like to be killed in a slasher flick, which would make a great song in ''Stage Fright 2''.

The comic can be found in 28 strips, posted on three pages. [[http://elsaletyoufinish.tumblr.com/post/92132144873/cinema-snob-frozen-01 Part 1.]] [[http://elsaletyoufinish.tumblr.com/post/93278842298/cinema-snob-frozen-02 Part 2.]] [[http://elsaletyoufinish.tumblr.com/post/94885902423/cinema-snob-frozen-03 Part 3.]]

'''Warning: This comic will have spoilers for the films shown.'''

* ButchLesbian: Snob references this stereotype when he claims ([[spoiler:but sarcastically, as the next panel reveals]]) that "if Elsa was lesbian, she'd have a butch haircut and wear sensible shoes".

** Snob takes Olaf description of what love is, and turns it around to him justifying his hate for certain films and wanting people not to see them.
* OrSoIHeard: While Anna claims she won't judge Kristoff crying over Elsa's ice castle, Snob insists she'll just mock Kristoff later on her Facebook page... not that such a thing ever happened to Snob himself.

* PraisingShowsYouDontWatch: InUniverse Snob says he's sure ''Animation/{{The Snow Queen|1957}}'' (1957) is superior to ''Frozen'', despite not having seen it, because it's both classic and foreign.

* ReferenceOverdosed: Like Snob's actual videos, there are dozens of references made here.
* RequiredSecondaryPowers: Since Elsa finds "The cold never bothered me anyway," Snob is disappointed that this means her nipples wouldn't be hardened by her dress even if it was made out of ice.

* SubvertedTrope: Snob remarks that he's surprised Hans doesn't give a one-liner before slaying Elsa, and that that's a missed opportunity for one.

** ''{{Franchise/Saw}}'', the movie just started a few seconds ago, but Snob thinks it's already better than ''Film/Saw3D''.

** ''Film/AfterEarth'': Agrees with the warning that "Fear will be your enemy", since Snob knows what it did to the leads in ''After Earth''.

** (Elsa wakes up) "Oh, what a nightmare, I dreamed ''Film/ThatsMyBoy'' made more money than ''Film/{{Titanic|1997}}''."

** He outright says he might watch too much porn when he notes that Elsa in her slinky dress is sexier than a lot of the naked women he's seen (as he's noted in his videos, he gets to see that every week).

* EightiesHair: Snob assumes Anna plays bass for a hair metal band.

* TrueArtIsForeign: This is one of the reasons why Snob assumes [[WesternAnimation/TheSnowQueen1957 the Soviet "Snow Queen" movie]] ''must'' be better than Frozen, even though he hasn't actually seen it.

** ''WesternAnimation/RockWarriors'': Initially thinks the trolls are this, and wonders if they're going to have another crossover with the [[WesternAnimation/ChallengeOfTheGoBots Go Bots]].

** ''Film/{{Epic}}'': Showing the slug as "our next annoying character punching bag". Snob isn't sure if he's grateful that answered his request.
** [[NeverTrustATrailer The trailers for Frozen]]: When Elsa looks at her hands, Snob says they can do anything, "even turn a shitty trailer with a reindeer and a snowman into Disney's best animated film in decades!".

** ''Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes'': Snob claims Creator/ChristopherLambert does a better Franchise/{{Tarzan}} impression than Anna.

** ''{{Film/Frozen}}'' (the thriller film): Snob says that this film is why Anna and Kristoff didn't take the ski lift up the mountain.

** Music/JohnnyCash: After Elsa says this place is where she won't hurt anyone, Snob plays Cash's cover of "Hurt", but then he explicitly says it's not a TakeThat. He feels that Elsa and Cash can make the "angst sound fucking genuine".

** ''Film/DieAnotherDay'': Assumes there is an indoor racetrack in Elsa's castle, where the chase scene in that film is happening.

** ''Film/TheLegendOfBoggyCreek'': The "Travis Crabtree" song is played over "Reindeers Are Better than People".

** ''Film/ToCatchAYeti'': Elsa's panic, when learning about the EndlessWinter she caused, mirror's how Snob felt when halfway through that film.

* BaitAndSwitchComparison: After the "I'm gonna' tell him." "Don't you dare!" exchange, Snob notes this was exactly what happened with him and Jillian for a ''WebVideo/BradTries'' video where Brad was going to eat bugs... except it was Jillian who was going to tell Brad, and Snob who told her not to.

** Wonders if "My own, personal flurry!" would get a reaction when ordering a [=McFlurry=] with that line... not that he ever when to UsefulNotes/McDonalds of course.

* RequiredSecondaryPowers: Since Elsa finds "The cold never bothered me anyway", Snob is disappointed this means her nipples wouldn't be hardened by her dress even if it was made out of ice.

* SarcasmMode: Snob saying that Grandpabbie "gives Elsa a warning, in a way that's perfectly reasonable to tell an already frightened eight-year-old".

* SelfDeprecation: Snob notes that Weslton looks similar to him and shows what Snob would be like with gray hair and a less deep voice.

** Creator/RankinBass: After Anna's skirt is frozen solid, Snob compares her movements to a character in their StopMotion specials. Snob later notes that we know Marshmallow will be okay because "bumbles bounce".
** ''Franchise/MortalKombat'': Snob assumes Kristoff's outfit covered with snow is actually {{Cosplay}}ing as Sub-Zero... except the outfit is the wrong color.
** ''Film/{{Transformers}}'': Snob says he hopes Oaken isn't really gay, because a gay Scandinavian is "as offensive a stereotype as a black used car salesman!".

* {{Suspiciously Specific Denial}}: Snob says he doesn't identify with Elsa's "Don't let them in, don't let them see" line at all. DescriptionCut to a blu-ray of ''Film/WeekendAtBernies''.

** ''Film/FiftyShadesOfGrey'': When Elsa gets chained up, Snob mistakes it for a scene from this movie.

** ''Literature/FiftyShadesOfGrey'': When Elsa gets chained up, Snob mistakes it for a scene from the film adaptation.

** ''{{Film/Frozen}}'' (the thriller film): Snob says that this film is why Anne and Kristoff didn't take the ski lift up the mountain.

* ShoutOut / ReferenceOverdosed: There is a reference on nearly every strip. In order of mention:

** (Elsa wakes up) "Oh, what a nightmare, I dreamed ''Film/ThatsMyBoy'' made more money than ''Film/{{Titanic}}''."

** ''Film/SawI'', the movie just started a few seconds ago, but Snob thinks it's already better than ''Film/Saw3D''.

** ''{{Film/Saw}}'', the movie just started a few seconds ago, but Snob thinks it's already better than ''Saw [=3D=]''.