History WarpThatAesop / PokeMon

* The anime that was one of anime's most AcceptableTargets for literal ''decades'' was actually well liked all along - they were just a SilentMajority.

** Your research showed that the most popular stuff and your most recognisable images are [[FirstGenerationWins the earlier stuff?]] ''NEVER'' use ''that'' to try and market your products - nobody actually likes them anyway.

** A major element of being a worthy main character is to accept your friends for what they are. Do not make an effort to change them, even if the result would be considerably stronger and cooler-looking, and even not if such a change is completely natural for them.

* Meditation will increase your attack power! Beating your belly like a drum will maximize it, but at the cost of half your lifespan--so be careful.
** Are you sure that's not Manga/DeathNote?

* If you sign up for a guild to be an exploration team, it's ''perfectly okay'' for said guild to run your entire life, tell you how to act and think, [[DisproportionateRetribution punish you for stupid things]], steal most of your money so you're helpless, and just generally treat you like crap. Those bad guys who make your life hell? They're always gonna get away with it, and you can never fight them and make them see reason. ''EVER.'' And Arceus help you if you even think about your friends who you recruit, because no matter how good they are, they're never good enough for Chatot. They're members of the Guild, and yet because they don't live in the Guild, they can't come with you on trips. Boy, [[SarcasmMode isn't that nice]]? Discrimination FTW. Oh, and you'll be part of this guild for the rest of your life, and they're gonna ambush you in the middle of the woods and they're not sorry about it. That's your life. Deal with it.
* If you come from the future, you should totally go on suicide missions and kill yourself. Everyone's cool with that, especially if they're getting saved.
* If someone spreads lies about you in a town, everyone you know and trust will turn on you and chase you out with the intention of killing you. All because of some unfounded rumor. And you have to travel through burning places and cold places to survive and they're not sorry.
* If bullies humiliate you, you can never fight back. You're sitting ducks and you deserve being torn to pieces by your boss, who is an arrogant jerk.

%%* Being forced to live with a trauma-inducing psychopath with a grudge, a romantic abuser, and an overbearing homeowner who refuses to let you leave? Comedy gold! (I've played Pokemon for 21 years and watched every episode and I have no idea what this is referencing) (Mimikyu, Mareanie, and Bewear, in that order)

* You don't need a license for paleontology to revive extinct species! Just mash some fossils together and see what sticks!
* You also don't need a license to breed your Pokémon and then give them to people around the world!
* Some people, or Feebas, are doomed to be ugly forever if they are the wrong nature, no matter how many Poffins or Poképuffs are given to them.

* Want to catch and/or befriend a particularly powerful creature? Don't bother trying to endear yourself to them and challenge them honorably; they'll appreciate the gesture, but you'll lose horribly. Instead, [[BadGuysDoTheDirtyWork wait for some villains to get to them first]]. That way you'll look compassionate for intervening 'and' they'll be sufficiently weakened for you!

* If you come from the future, you should totally go on suicide missions and kill yourself. Everyone's cool with that, especially if their butts get saved.

%%* Being forced to live with a trauma-inducing psychopath with a grudge, a romantic abuser, and an overbearing homeowner who refuses to let you leave? Comedy gold! (I've played Pokemon for 21 years and watched every episode and I have no idea what this is referencing)

* If you sign up for a guild to be an exploration team, it's ''perfectly okay'' for said guild to run your entire life, tell you how to act and think, [[DisproportionateRetribution punish you for stupid things]], steal most of your money so you're helpless, and just generally treat you like crap. Those bad guys who make your life hell? They're always gonna get away with it, and you can never fight them and make them see reason. ''EVER.'' And God help you if you even think about your friends who you recruit, because no matter how good they are, they're never good enough for Chatot. They're members of the Guild, and yet because they don't live in the Guild, they can't come with you on trips. Boy, isn't that nice? Discrimination FTW. Oh, and you'll be part of this guild for the rest of your life, and they're gonna ambush you in the middle of the woods and they're not sorry about it. That's your life. Deal with it.

* If you sign up for a guild to be an exploration team, it's ''perfectly okay'' for said guild to run your entire life, tell you how to act and think, [[DisproportionateRetribution punish you for stupid things]], steal most of your money so you're helpless, and just generally treat you like crap. Those bad guys who make your life hell? They're always gonna get away with it, and you can never fight them and make them see reason. ''EVER.'' And god help you if you even think about your friends who you recruit, because no matter how good they are, they're never good enough for Chatot. They're members of the Guild, and yet because they don't live in the Guild, they can't come with you on trips. Boy, isn't that nice? Discrimination FTW. Oh, and you'll be part of this guild for the rest of your life, and they're gonna ambush you in the middle of the woods and they're not sorry about it. That's your life. Deal with it.

** If on the other hand that sort of discrimination might actually be against league rules, don't bother reporting it to the proper authorities (even if you could very easily get in contact with them through any veterinary clinic). Just team up with the criminals that have been grossly obsessed with abducting your star Pokémon, and help them infiltrate the gym in exchange for a disguise of your own. Who cares what crimes they might commit once they're in there? Gotta get that badge!

* Being forced to live with a trauma-inducing psychopath with a grudge, a romantic abuser, and an overbearing homeowner who refuses to let you leave? Comedy gold!
* Everybody is a complete idiot [[PaperThinDisguise when it comes to recognizing people in poor disguises]], but are competent in everything else.

* There's nothing wrong with abandoning your two (heavily implied to be underaged) companions for a little action. After all, the embarrassment from what conspired during this time [[NoodleIncident (that you will NEVER]] [[OldShame bring up again)]] is probably well deserved.

* You can only find your true inner strength and perfect your fighting style [[CrisisMakesPerfect in the heat of battle when things are at their worst]]. With this in mind, [[HardWorkHardlyWorks don't bother practicing these things in advance]]. All you'll do is [[RunningGag give lumps to penguins]] or [[CriticalStatusBuff convince everyone that you're an animal abuser]].

** Conversely, for the writers: If you ever get any closer to achieving your life's dream, no matter what else you might be able to do afterwards, your life will immediately become totally uninteresting, so it's better for everyone involved that you always fail in the end and start from scratch.

* Faun over every female nurse and police officer with BishieSparkle POWAH! Then, enjoy getting cockblocked via a redhead, a glasses-wearing pipsqueak, or a neurotoxic prostate exam from a frog.

* If you sign up for a guild to be an exploration team, it's perfectly okay for said guild to run your entire life, tell you how to act and think, punish you for stupid things, steal most of your money so you're helpless, and treat you like crap. Those bad guys who make your life hell? They're always gonna get away with it, and you can never fight them and make them see reason. EVER. And god help you if you even think about your friends who you recruit, because no matter how good they are, they're never good enough for Chatot. They're members of the Guild, and yet because they don't live in the Guild, they can't come with you on trips. Boy, isn't that nice? Discrimination FTW. Oh, and you'll be part of this guild for the rest of your life, and they're gonna ambush you in the middle of the woods and they're not sorry about it. That's your life. Deal with it.

* Not liking a certain product totally justified getting banned from a gym and almost losing your chance to earn a badge to compete in the Pokemon League.

** Animals like to beat the crap out of each other, but they can't do it well without you! So even if they clearly have the capacity to think for themselves and run their own lives, you should capture them and force them to fight each other for your entertainment! They really want to be bossed around; all that escaping is just playing hard to get. After all, you have the right to enslave them because you're part of the majority group and have the technology to [[GottaCatchThemAll catch them]].

* ''{{Anime/Pokemon}}'': Animals like to beat the crap out of each other, but they can't do it well without you! So even if they clearly have the capacity to think for themselves and run their own lives, you should capture them and force them to fight each other for your entertainment! They really want to be bossed around; all that escaping is just playing hard to get. After all, you have the right to enslave them because you're part of the majority group and have the technology to [[GottaCatchThemAll catch them]].

* It's completely okay to kidnap sentient beings, use them as vehicles and tools, and force them to fight for your amusement. In fact, they all want you to. [[HappinessInSlavery It's the true meaning of friendship.]]
** A major element of being a worthy main character is to accept your friends for what they are. Do not make an effort to change them, even if the result would be considerably stronger and cooler-looking, and even not if such a change is completely natural for them.
* Gonna visit a new region? [[BagOfSpilling Abandon]] [[PutOnABus those]] weak-ass Pokemon who failed to let you win the tournament! Hell, [[BusCrash wreck the damn bus]], too! Except your starter, for only that one has a hidden reset switch.
* Exploiting Pokemon to further your own ambitions is encouraged, unless you wear a uniform with an R on it.
** It's OK to treat your Pokemon like garbage, but your rival? Ohhhh no freaking way, unless it's Gary Oak.
*** If you mistreat your Pokemon to the point of animal cruelty, but just so happen to be named Paul, [[DracoInLeatherPants your fans will overlook your horrible traits.]] [[CreatorsPet And so will the writers.]]