History Series / TheColbertReport

** Stephen turns Rick Santorum's Iraq War ''LordOfTheRings'' analogy into an analogy backfire. Can be seen [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/pun0an/the-colbert-report-santorum-s-iraqi-lord-of-the-rings here.]] Since Stephen is a big [[http://www.jerriblank.com/colbert_nytimes.html LOTR fan]], he probably couldn't wait to sink his teeth into that one.

* {{Flynning}}: Colbert and Elijah Wood, both of them using versions of [[TheLordOfTheRings Sting]] (Colbert brandishing one given to him by Creator/PeterJackson).

-->This, of course, is [[TheLordOfTheRings Aragorn's]] sword Andúril, Flame of the West, forged from the shards of Narsil, given to me by Creator/ViggoMortensen. Now, this has nothing to do with the metaphor -- I just want to remind everyone that I have this.

* AnalProbing: A segment about an "Alien Hunter," Derrel Simms, sees Mr. Simms recount a story about him being probed by aliens in his youth. After describing the alien probe in very phallic terms, Colbert interrupts him in a voiceover just before Simms was about to say where the probe was "jammed very painfully," exclaiming, "Okay, that's enough; I think we ''all'' know where the probe goes." Simms then reveals that it went into [[spoiler: [[SubvertedTrope his nasal passage.]]]]

--> '''Stephen''': I'm hitting the gym, getting pretty cut. And I'm shedding pounds by not cooking with butter. Instead, I use it to grease up my body when I work out. That way, none of those stroke gays, or stro-mos as we call them at the gym, can get a handle on me.

-->'''Colbert''': (on ''Film/NinjaAssassin'') "Yeah, impressive, but you know who you didn't see in that video? Me! {{beat}}) [[StealthExpert Who's the better ninja now?]]"

--> '''Colbert''': I am on the South Carolina Republican primary like white ... on the Republican primary.

-->'''Colbert''': We have a broadcast legend ... who will be interviewing Tom Brokaw.

--> '''Stephen:''' I LOOK TERRIBLE IN PINK! I'M A WINTER!

--> Killing the aliens \\
Loving the aliens \\

--> '''Smaug''': Never laugh at a live dragon, motherf**ker!

--> In the May 10, 2012 episode, Stephen tells a story of a monkey who had accidentally swallowed a peanut, causing the zookeeper to lick the monkey's butt (in order for the monkey to defecate). At the end of the episode, Stephen pulls out a can of Planter's.

--> ...that's a fact, and nothing can convince me otherwise. [a beat] Here to convince me otherwise...

* EarnYourHappyEnding: The final shows. [[spoiler: Stephen makes peace with bears, sells his studio equipment to the general public (donating the proceeds to charity), and kills Grimmy, thus granting him immortality. He then leaves with Santa Claus, Abraham Lincoln, and Alex Trebek to find a new role in life, ending the show thanking all his crew, audience, and friends for their help before passing things back to Jon.]]

--> '''Stephen:''' We need a new leader soon because America is standing at a precipice. Which, I think, is either a bonfire or a poisonous Australian jellyfish.

-->'''Stephen Colbert:''' ...though we've never been seen together. Hmmm...''[curls hair over forehead, [[ClarkKenting takes off glasses]]]''...I wonder why.

-->'''Stephen:''' Yes, Obama is blowing an uncertain trumpet. Well said, Brit. Spoken like a man who knows how to blow a [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_trombone rusty trombone]]. But perhaps... ''(audience cheers)'' Oh, yes. And you will not believe the feeling when he blows it.

--> "The point is, you don't have to make me God himself. But if that happens, hey - I get it."

* GrandFinale: As expected, it was suitably impressive, with Colbert first [[spoiler: shooting Grimmy during the last-ever 'Cheating Death with Stephen Colbert' segment, becoming immortal]], then after a commercial break, he begins [[spoiler: to sing Vera Lynn's WWII standard "We'll Meet Again". The camera then pans to both Creator/JonStewart and Music/RandyNewman (on piano) joining him. Then, over 150 former guests begin to gradually come out on stage to join him, along with several pre-taped sequences including the show's crew, Tek Jansen, astronaut Scott Kelly on the ISS, troops in Afghanistan and others singing as well.]] Once the stage clears and the studio is empty, we find Colbert [[spoiler: on the Colbert studio's roof, where he joins Abraham Lincoln, Santa Claus, and Creator/AlexTrebek in Santa's sleigh to live in eternity.]] Before he [[spoiler: rides away, he breaks character briefly, to thank the guests & crew that have been on the show over the last nine years.]] He then throws the show [[spoiler: back to Stewart, who wraps the show (inferring slyly it's been one big Daily Show segment) up as a 'great Report',]] before showing a [[spoiler: Moment Of Zen of Stewart & Colbert breaking character during a show hand-off from 2010.]]

* TheHeroDies: Throughout the final few episodes, Grimmy keeps strongly hinting to Stephen that this is going to happen at the end. [[spoiler: However the final episode subverts it; Stephen actually kills ''Grimmy''.]]

--->'''Stephen:''' You know who else wore purple? Hitler. (Photoshop of Hitler in Gabby Douglas' leotard) You just can't tell because he's in black and white most of the time.

-->"Snap out of it, Col-burt!"

--> Like ''[[GratuitousSpanish mis hermanos]]'' The Music/DeadKennedys say, "Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor!"

-->'''Guest:''' Jesus said, "I am divine, and you are the branches." \\
'''Colbert:''' ...Sir, God does not approve of puns.
-->'''Colbert:''' ...But specifically it is a affront to the Christmas Trees' Lord and savior, '''Treesus'''
* LampshadeHanging: When discussing that "all things must come to an end," Stephen mentions, "Eventually, this show will be [[ScrewedByTheNetwork cancelled.]]"

** Stephen's campaign to get a bridge named after himself in Hungary on the grounds that there was no rule stating the namesake of the bridge had to be Hungarian. [[spoiler: He later found out they did have to speak the language, however (and to be dead).]]

--> '''Stephen:''' So do you celebrate Christmas or Hanukkah?
--> '''Bobby:''' Sure.

--> This, of course, is [[TheLordOfTheRings Aragorn's]] sword Andúril, Flame of the West, forged from the shards of Narsil, given to me by Creator/ViggoMortensen. Now, this has nothing to do with the metaphor -- I just want to remind everyone that I have this.
* MisterSeahorse: Stephen's been pregnant at least twice on the show, [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/rqvi06/the-colbert-report-award-to-the-wise once]] by his EvilTwin and [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/t2kayc/the-colbert-report-soap-opera-product-placement once]] tragically by [[spoiler: [[SomeoneToRememberHimBy a box of Cheerios]]]].

--> '''Colbert''': Oh? That's ok? A coma patient, an old man with a feeding tube. But heaven forbid we make one perforated colon reference.

--> '''Stephen''': A zoo is nothing but monkey prison. Which means this monkey has made this zookeeper his bitch.

--> '''Colbert''': (''on same-sex marriage law passing in New York state'') Folks, I am not happy, or 'gay,' that this law passed. I'm very sad, or 'heterosexual.'

--> "Beating me in a dance-off on the ''technicality'' that he's a '''much''' better dancer than I am!"

-->"And they say America doesn't make anything anymore!"

-->'''Thomas''': Apparently, they think its the "Shizzle-nizzle".
-->'''Lord Grathan''': Soon Downton will be kicking it with mad bitches and benjamins.

* StealthPun: Stephen's attorney Gorlock is [[spoiler:a legal alien]].

--> '''Stephen''': Like being gay, being British is a choice.
--> '''Hicklin''': It's a fallacy that gay is a choice-
--> '''Stephen''': This is a family show, I'd rather you not use the word 'fallacy'.
* StockFootage: There is a short clip of a roaring bear that is shown pretty much every time Stephen mentions bears, especially during the Threatdown segments.

--> '''[[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/n27g4x/the-colbert-report-barack-obama-s-gay-blasphemy Stephen]]''': I am still reeling from Pres. Obama's announcement yesterday that he is gay. (''crowd laughs'') Now I have to assume that's the reason he supports gay marriage.

-->"Come on, what's wrong Rain? Tell me when Korea lists the non-existent embargo on BALLS!"
-->"Hey Rain, nice jacket! My sister wants it back."

* TransparentCloset: It's [[strike:heavily implied]] ''outright stated'' that Stephen (in-character) has repressed homosexual tendencies.

* {{Troperiffic}}

-->'''Colbert''': ''Ted Nugent has condemned your generation as lazing and apathetic. Your response?''
--> '''NYU Student''': ''Who's Ted Nugent?''

--> '''Stephen''': Donald Trump is a friend. He's my best friend. Number 1, best, greatest friend of all time. We race yachts, we trade mistresses. I call him "[[MealTicket Trump Card]]," he calls me "[[MistakenForServant Col-beer]]." That said, the guy's a boob. He looks like [[FloweryInsults a tangelo had sex with an old dishrag]]. And I can say that because I love this man.

* VolleyingInsults: [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/s7mibo/the-colbert-report-steve-carell Even Stevphens]] with Creator/SteveCarell. Many insults were thrown back and forth. A snippet:
--> '''Stephen''': Steve, I am thrilled for your success. Hell, I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming, and it is a joy to see you in person. When I just see you in your movies I forget how funny and attractive you are. Frankly, I'm excited.
--> '''Steve''': Of course you are excited, Stephen. I'm not your normal guest, people have heard of me. Stephen, I am an international movie star.
--> '''Stephen''': Yes, Steve. I suppose Canada counts as international. And yes, most of my guests are people who contribute to society. So bantering with an old friend about mindless Tinseltown pablum is a welcome vacation from substance.
--> '''Steve''': Thanks, Stephen. Is a vacation for me too. I am used to having 8 million people watch me on TV. Doing the ''Report'' is like being in the Witness Relocation Program.

--> '''Rain''': Let's just say, don't quit your day job.
--> '''Stephen''': My day job happens to be president of the "I Hate Rain Fanclub"!

* WikiVandal: Wikiality.

-->"''War '''And''' Peace''? [[CatchPhrase Pick a side, we're at war]]".

-->'''Colbert:''' I don't care who confirmed these names! It is wrong! I mean, "Wi Tu Lo"? "Bang Ding Ow"? This is a ''Korean'' airline; [[BaitAndSwitch those are Chinese names!]] That's racist, ok! And if you're going to do a racist joke, at least get the ethnicity right! Like Captain "Park Ma Plen Tu-Sun" or "Ha Yu Lan Dis Tang"!

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which lasted from January 2015 to August 2016. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former ''Daily Show'' correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona and lasted from 2017 to 2018. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than ''The Colbert Report'''s focus on mainstream cable news pundits such as Bill O'Reilly.[[/note]]

''The Colbert Report'' (pronounced Col-''[[ItsPronouncedTroPAY bear]]'' Re-''[[GratuitousFrench pore]]'') was the Emmy award winning (Best Writing - Variety, 2008, 2010, and 2013-14; Best Variety, 2013-14) SpinOff from ''Series/TheDailyShow'', featuring the screen persona of news anchor Creator/StephenColbert. The show operated as a parody of news talk programs such as ''Series/TheOReillyFactor''. (When the show was pitched as "Stephen Colbert parodying Bill O'Reilly", it was picked up immediately without even a pilot.) It aired on Creator/ComedyCentral, immediately following its sister program.

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which lasted from January 2015 to August 2016. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former ''Daily Show'' correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona, and lasted from 2017 to 2018. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than ''The Colbert Report'' 's focus on mainstream cable news pundits such as Bill O'Reilly.[[/note]]

* AirGuitar: In the beginning of every 'Sport Report' segment Stephen rocks out on the air guitar. [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/i9cr44/the-colbert-report-sport-report---barry-bonds At one point he points out that he can play air guitar even with a broken wrist.]]

** Stephen turns Rick Santorum's Iraq War ''LordOfTheRings'' analogy into a an analogy backfire. Can be seen [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/pun0an/the-colbert-report-santorum-s-iraqi-lord-of-the-rings here.]] Since Stephen is a big [[http://www.jerriblank.com/colbert_nytimes.html LOTR fan]], he probably couldn't wait to sink his teeth into that one.
** Republican politician Andre Bauer compared poor people to animals which is an analogy backfire on its own, but [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/8ukd1u/the-colbert-report-andre-bauer-is-not-against-animals Stephen of course made it even more of a backfire by following the analogy to its logical conclusion.]]

* AnalProbing: A segment about an "Alien Hunter," Derrel Simms, sees Mr. Simms recount a story about him being probed by aliens in his youth. After describing the alien probe in very phallic terms, Colbert interrupts him in a voice over just before Simms was about to say where the probe was "jammed very painfully," exclaiming, "Okay, that's enough; I think we ''all'' know where the probe goes." Simms then reveals that it went into [[spoiler: [[SubvertedTrope his nasal passage.]]]]

** At one point, Stephen had a "war" with, of all things, Miracle Whip. It looks like it begun on October 15, 2009, [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/8xmsj4/the-colbert-report-the-mayo-lution-will-not-be-televised when Stephen "attacked" the Miracle Whip commercials.]] In response, Miracle Whip bought ad space on every commercial break during his November 12 show and well... [[HilarityEnsues Hilarity Ensued.]] [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jr9s8WO2t4M Now here's some cool people dancing.]] And then there's Stephen's [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/cnw6wz/the-colbert-report-miracle-whip-buys-ad-space response]], which points out how Miracle Whip buying ad space on his show would give him money that he could use to buy more delicious [[HoistByHisOwnPetard mayo]].

--> '''Stephen''': I'm hitting the gym, getting pretty cut. And I'm shedding pounds by not cooking with butter. Instead I use it to grease up my body when I work out. That way, none of those stroke gays, or stro-mos as we call them at the gym, can get a handle on me.

* BlackComedy: on his 6/27/2013 show, in response to Mayor Bloomburg wanting to ban sparklers from the 4th of July celebrations, Stephen got his fire marshal to wear an uncle Sam style hat and fake beard and hold a lit sparkler. It then cuts to technical difficulties, followed by Stephen comforting the fire marshal's wife, and then lighting a sparkler as a way to mourn her. Technical difficulties show up again, then we see Stephen comforting the couple's two children before giving them sparklers to play with. As they walk off, he yells "Oh, and kids, remember those need parental super-...they'll be fine."

** ''The Colbert Report'' began as a spin-off of ''The Daily Show''. At the end, it spun back into its parent series when Stephen said his last line and cut back to Jon on his set.
* BrassBalls: Creator/StephenColbert talks about his brass balls quite often. They're the only thing that give him the guts to speak [[StrawmanPolitical the truth]].

* BrokenPedestal: In the episode that aired shortly after Owen Bundy and several other dozen heavily armed ranchers forced federal law enforcement agents to back down from apprehending Bundy for refusing to pay over $1 million in livestock grazing fees he accrued over the years, Colber began singing "The Ballad of Owen Bundy" in commemoration of his victory. When Bundy told a newscrew: "let me tell you something else I know about the Negro," Colbert stopped singing, and allowed Bundy to explain himself. Bundy went on to say that because of [[InsaneTrollLogic the current high rates of incarceration, substance abuse, unemployment, and single mother hoseholds, black head no idea how to live in freedom]] and [[HappinessInSlavery would be better off as slaves,]] specially [[ArtisticLicenseHistory since parents in enslaved families got to raise their children together and never separated.]]

* CharacterBlog: The [[https://twitter.com/StephenAtHome @stephenathome]] twitter.
* ChessWithDeath: The "Cheating Death" segments begin with a brief black and white clip (a la ''Film/TheSeventhSeal'') of Stephen [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin cheating]] [[TheGrimReaper Death]] in some game. Usually they're playing chess and Stephen uses LookADistraction to switch pieces around, but every so often he's running a three-card monte game instead. In the series finale, [[spoiler:Stephen tries to do a "Cheating Death" segment, only for Grimmy to try to kill him during the opening clip.]]

** ChristmasSongs: "Another Christmas Song", which is all about getting people to buy "Another Christmas Song" so Stephen can collect the royalties. Also an AntiChristmasSong performed by Toby Keith, about the alleged [[StrawmanPolitical left-wing]] "war on Christmas" and how [[PatrioticFervor real Americans]] will [[StuffBlowingUp fight back]].

** UnderTheMistletoe: A running gag. Stephen ends up under the mistletoe with everyone who comes inside his cabin except Santa and Elvis, but only ends up kissing the aforementioned bear, everyone else finding a way out of it.

** In the finale, after [[spoiler:shooting the Grim Reaper in the opening of final segment of "Cheating Death",]] Stephen tosses Sweetness to the same audience member, who then shoots himself in the knee.

* CryingWolf: Stephen warns about crying wolf or rather crying zombie in [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/yulr8u/the-colbert-report-threatdown---zombies the end of this clip]] about college students playing zombie tag. According to Stephen this game will leave us vulnerable when the rage virus escapes.

** He couldn't help but admit that [[ArchEnemy Rain]] dressed up in a hedgehog costume was adorable. Or that Rain in general is adorable.

** Another frequent one is "Mano a whatever-the-spanish-word-for-mano-is"
* EnforcedPlug: Stephen parodies this often with Doritos, once even spending an entire week on location in "Chili-delphia, the city of brotherly crunch." In a weird sort of reverse ProductPlacement, Doritos hadn't actually paid him when he started the gag, but apparently a deal has been reached involving the large exchange of Nacho Cheese Doritos.

* EvenTheGuysWantHim: While in Vancouver for the 2010 Winter Games, a camera pan over the crowd revealed one cardboard sign bearing the words ''"Marry me Stephen! (It's legal here!)"''

* EyeScream: Recommended as a way for republican candidates to stop talking about rape, after a slew of them made some questionable remarks about it. Specifically, he prescribed jabbing a pencil in their eye, up to their brain cavity and poking at their brain until thoughts of mentioning rape go away.

* FoodPorn: One of Stephen's [=SuperPAC=] ads blasts other [=SuperPAC=]s for pandering to Iowa voters with "cheap cornography" and says Iowans deserve better, and then shows slow-motion footage of corn set to porn music.

** LampShaded in [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/k7oqos/the-colbert-report-foreshadowing this]] segment before a Richard Branson interview.
** Colbert once said, "Eventually, this show will be cancelled" in jest a few years before deciding to end it in 2014. Overlaps with FunnyAneurysmMoment.

* FriendOfMaskedSelf: On the November 13, 2008 episode, Stephen Colbert tells the audience he has a "close personal relationship" with [[Characters/SupermanTheCharacter Superman]], then implies that he ''is'' Superman.

* GettingCrapPastTheRadar: Apparently, Stephen Colbert refers to his Australian '''Formula 401''' cans' contents as [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/rp68kf/the-colbert-report-australian-sperm-shortage crock juice]]. He himself finds it so funny that immediately afterwords, he has to pause to regain his composure and NOT laugh.

* {{Hammerspace}}: The unseen part of Stephen Colbert's desk is like a country unto itself. [[http://www.cc.com/video-collections/hnv15m/the-colbert-report-best-of-the-colbert-report/9hh69w Comedy Central has kindly compiled the highlights,]] but [[Wiki/TVTropes This Very Wiki]] kept score too, and tallies up: a fax machine, a "stay the course" notebook, telephone, pitchfork (and presumably other AngryMob accoutrements), the Apology Box, a BigRedButton, Rahm Emanuel's finger, Abraham Lincoln's skull, a Starbucks, a ''rival'' Starbucks (now defunct), a Foot Locker, the Atone Phone for apologetic Jews, a suitcase with Creator/JohnOliver inside, a (probably endless) supply of [[TrademarkFavoriteFood Ben & Jerry's Americone Dream,]] a washing machine, and a secret prison for terrorists, now closed. April 8, 2009 saw that the desk also yielded three Jewish slaves (whom Stephen promptly freed), and he admitted it also has a few Asians and a pyramid (incomplete), August 2009 saw Stephen produce a desk lamp from under the desk - a desk lamp that is apparently very good at arguing about health care reform. Stephen also keeps an emergency supply of sugar, and of a four-ounce Mini Gulp (for when the Big Gulp is shrunk) in his desk. Other mysteries yielded by that treasure trove include a poll-sausage making machine and the Ham-Head of Karl Rove, and, of course, a Shofar. And probably [[YesButWhatDoesZataproximetacineDO the entire line of Prescott Pharmaceutical supplies]] - up to an including a freaking ''[[WhyDidItHaveToBeSnakes snake.]]'' As of August 2011 he has a chicken and bars of gold stored under there, along with other potential forms of currency if the economy collapses. In February 2012 he produced two kittens, named Whiskers and Other Whiskers ... And last but not least, he keeps his lovingly-polished Emmys and his Peabody award under his desk, which he pulls out for his [[EvilGloating Heroic Gloating.]] Any more references needed, just see the list of videos helpfully categorized under the tag "[[http://www.colbertnation.com/video/tags/under+the+desk Under the Desk.]]"

* HollywoodAtheist: [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/u468bk/the-colbert-report-atheists-in-foxholes Stephen of course]] has an Hollywood Atheist view on atheists.

** Made funnier by realising that John Yarmuth was (at the time) showing [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waFeZ8n77F8 a series of political ads]] in a similar vein (and explicitly parodying some very negative ads at the time from the Other Team).

** Except when Stephen gets upset, when he'll pronounce it differently to himself.

** Stephen promoted his sister Elizabeth Colbert Busch on his show when she was running for congress, pronouncing her name Colburt.

* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Stephen Colbert the character is a jerk, but he can't help but let his heart of gold shine through on occasion. Especially when he is helping various charities. Colbert the actor has said the character really does want to do the right thing and thinks he is, but is too misinformed and arrogant to realize he has no idea what he's talking about.
* TheJester: The most preominent modern example of this trade.

* TheLittleShopThatWasntThereYesterday: Invoked by Stephen in [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/i8ohf4/the-colbert-report-put-the-cursed-monkey-paw-down this segment.]] Stephen concludes that things keep going wrong in the cleaunup of the Mexican Gulf oil spill because someone keeps making wishes with a cursed monkey paw bought in such a shop.

--> This of course is [[TheLordOfTheRings Aragorn's]] sword Andúril, Flame of the West, forged from the shards of Narsil, given to me by Creator/ViggoMortensen. Now, this has nothing to do with the metaphor -- I just want to remind everyone that I have this.

** On the June 7, 2006 edition, Colbert said "Tonight's guest is a pioneer in Mars exploration. Hopefully tonight he'll explain how they faked a space landing there too."
** On the July 27, 2006 episode, Colbert said "And here's the Smithsonian Institute's Air and Space Museum, where you can see the original rocks from the soundstage where they faked the Moon landing. It's a part of Hollywood history."
** On the August 1, 2007 edition, Colbert said, "Unless you've been on the moon this week, you know I broke my wrist. And if you have been on the moon, congratulations, you are the first!"

* MoralEventHorizon: Invoked and parodied. In order to be named Keith Olbermann's "Worst Person In The World" Colbert promised to slap a baby with a puppy. The actual slapping is conspicuously covered up by a "[[RelaxOVision Technical Difficulties]]" screen.

--> By the way, it's OK when they call each other "Tigger", but you should not.
* {{Nerdgasm}}: Stephen had a four-day Nerdgasm in December 2012 in the form of "Hobbit Week", celebrating the release of ''Film/TheHobbitAnUnexpectedJourney'', in which he interviewed Creator/IanMcKellen, Creator/MartinFreeman, Creator/AndySerkis, and Creator/PeterJackson--in which he seemed genuinely excited to talk--and decked out the whole set in Tolkien paraphernalia. There was probably [[ProductPlacement some kind of deal involved]], but no doubt [[JustForFun/OneOfUs Stephen]] (described by Jackson as "the biggest Tolkien geek I have ever met") would have done it regardless.
** Particularly when he lectured the movie people on the legendarium--''most'' particularly when he explains the relationship of the [[AllThereInTheManual LOTR Appendix]] and ''The Hobbit'' to Peter Jackson.

* NoKillLikeOverkill: "That was not stripmining; that's how I hunt quail."
* NotThatKindOfDoctor: Stephen has a honorary doctorate in fine arts. This doesn't stop him from presenting "Cheating Death", his segment on illness, health, and pharmaceuticals, with the name "Dr. Stephen T. Colbert, DFA".

** Stephen made [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/ippmoa/the-colbert-report-the-colbert-coalition-s-anti-gay-marriage-ad his own version of an anti gay marriage ad.]]

** In a [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/p3nkju/the-colbert-report-willie-recall parody of attack ads]] Stephen attacks Willie Nelson. Stephen is not happy that Willie also got an ice cream flavour.

** Stephen showed [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/ufq6qh/the-colbert-report-prescott-financial---gold--women---sheep this ad]] telling you to stock up on gold, women and sheep before the apocalypse.

** There was also the night that [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/y0xgng/the-colbert-report-charity-begins-at-11-30 Bing promised to donate $2,500 to relief for the gulf oil spill]] every time he said "bing." He was up to the challenge.
** Everytime Creator/JeffGoldblum appears he makes sure to plug ''Series/LawAndOrderCriminalIntent'', regardless of how apropos it is or isn't... but he won't be doing that anymore; the show was cancelled in June 2011.
** In 2012, Stephen mocked sponsor Wheat Thins by reading quotes from the hilariously specific memo they had provided him to promote the product. It included such detailed instructions as "[Stephen] shall not be shown eating more than 16." He jams 16 in his mouth, when when he goes to add the 17th, the show suddenly has "technical difficulties." When he returns, a lawyer is on set and Stephen is mock-apologizing to Nabisco.

* PuppyDogEyes: This is how Colbert tries to convince Julie Andrews to sing "Accentuate the Positive" with him -- he just starts singing it himself while gazing at her with the softest, puppyest, most pleading pair of big brown eyes you ever did see. [[spoiler:She joins in.]]

** Colbert does a similar thing when talking about people that called Paul Ryan's speech "misleading","breathtakingly dishonest", and "world record for greatest number of blatant lies" into "breathtaking", "lead", "world", and "shone" (from "dishonest).

* RougeAnglesOfSatin: Coupled with not using spellcheck at all when Stephen [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/mk4ma4/the-colbert-report-tip-wag---gay-bar-bachelorette-bans---mitt-romney-s-iphone-app sings Amercia's praises.]]

* SelfMadeMan: Deconstructed. To prove that he is a self-made man, Stephen fired all of his staff, and shut own all of his equipment, except a desk lamp and his iPhone, which was now his camera, creating a major case of StylisticSuck. At the end of the segment, he needs someone else's help to save him from choking on a dry-erase marker cap.

* ShoutOut: Among the people who've donated to Colbert's [=SuperPAC=] are [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings Lord Sauron]], [[Literature/AtlasShrugged John Galt]], [[Series/StrangersWithCandy Jerri Blank]], [[WebOriginal/{{Inglip}} R Inglip]], D.B. Cooper, and UsefulNotes/{{Jesus}} of Nazereth.

** Then after watching ''Film/SpeedRacer'' and realising that Rain had a leading role, Colbert wrote his own screenplay for a sequel which apparently consists of Rain getting run over by a car for two hours.

* StockFootage: There is a short clip of a roaring bear that is shown pretty much every time Stephen mentions bears, especially during the Threatdown segements.

** StrawmanHasAPoint: Often done intentionally. And quite often (accidentally) by Colbert himself. Because Colbert is a professional comedian with his own talkshow, and quite a few of the guests he brings on are authors, or otherwise un-charismatic and poorly trained to defend their point from critics, Colbert comes out on top of quite a few arguments with people who are supposed to strike back at him but don't know how. Colbert noted in an interview that this was a problem in the early days of the show, no one in Washington would come on his show because people are naturally reluctant to be interviewed by someone who they know is willfully going to be ignorant and twist what they say.

* StunnedSilence: [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/a29405/the-colbert-report-murdoch-s-media-empire-might-go-down-the-toilet Stephen's response]] when he learns that among the victims of "News of the World" hacking scandal were the voicemails of victims of 9/11, families of British soldiers killed in the war in Afghanistan and the voicemail of a missing 13 year old girl. "News of the World" even took the liberty of deleting some of the girl's messages when her voicemail started to fill up leading to her family being given false hope that she might still be alive.

** Colbert claims that it'll take more than a 4 star general to get him to shave his hair off. [[UsefulNotes/BarackObama Guess who appears to give an executive order for General Rey Odierno to shave Colbert's head]].

--> "Keep typing, BITCH!"

** The "Cantons Controversy," anyone? Stephen turned this into an entire series--and even a song!--of TrashTalk. By way of background, Stephen initially praised Canton, Ohio, after John [=McCain=] made a campaign stop there, while at the same time taking a jab at Canton, Georgia. The next week, he made a fake apology and directed his TrashTalk to another Canton. By the time the segments had run their course, Stephen had insulted five towns or cities named Canton in five separate states, including WhereItAllBegan--Canton, Ohio, after UsefulNotes/BarackObama also campaigned there.

* UnfortunateImplications: Invoked and exaggerated when, after Bill O'Reilly made remarks about all [[InterchangeableAsianCultures asians being hardworking]], he took the idea and ran with it, causing the show to experience technical difficulties [[RuleOfThree three times]] before going to a commercial break.

* WaitWhat: In the episode that covered Owen Bundy's victory against the Federal Government after Bundy and a group of armed ranchers made federal law enforcement officers back down from apprehending Bundy after he refused to shell over $1 million in grazing fees thathe had accumulated over the years, Colbert began singing "The Ballad of Owen Bundy" in commemoration. When Bundy told a newcrew "Let, me tell something else I know about the negro," Colbert stopped singing, and alowed Bundy to explain his point. Bundy went on a [[InsaneTrollLogic tirade where he explained that high percentage of single mother homes, the high rates of incarceration rate and reliance on government assistance, like food stamps, is proof that they don't know how to live in freedom,]] and [[HappinessInSlavery would be better off being slaves again]] [[InsaneTrollLogic because during slavery, black families stayed together.]]

* WhatIsThisThingYouCallLove: While Stephen talking about how the Pentagon was teaching robots about ethics, his robot Bleep Blorp came out from backstage and told him about how it had learned about ethics from its cousin, a coffee maker in the pentagon. They had a short discussion which ended when Bleep Blorp asked "What is this thing you humans call love?" and Stephen volunteered to show it, before simply pulling out its kill switch, deactivating it.

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former ''Daily Show'' correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than ''The Colbert Report'' 's focus on mainstream cable news pundits such as Bill O'Reilly.[[/note]]

* BrokenPedestal: In the episode that aired shortly after Owen Bundy and several other dozen heavily armed ranchers forced federal law enforcement agents to back down from apprehending Bundy for refusing to pay over $1 million in livestock grazing fees he accrued over the years, Colber began singing "The Ballad of Owen Bundy" in commemoration of his victory. When Bundy told a newscrew: "let me tell you something else I know about the Negro," Colbert stopped singing, and allowed Bundy to explain himself. Bundy went on to say that because of [[InsaneTrollLogic the current high rates of incarceration, substance abuse, unemployment, and single mother hoseholds, black head no idea how to live in freedom]] and [[HappinessInSlavery would be better off as slaves,]] specially [[YouFailHistoryForever since parents in enslaved families got to raise their children together and never separated.]]

* YouFailLogicForever: Colbert's own special brand of tortured logic permeates just about every explanation or piece of reasoning on the show. The lead-up to the epic MeleeATrois ran on a deeply bizarre use of "the transitive property of Huckabee". Not to mention his method of deducing everything from the truth about the Illuminati to the results of the 2008 presidential election, which consists of him free-associating words at random.

* AltumVidetur: Stephen's fireplace has '[[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esse_quam_videri VIDERI QUAM ESSE]]' engraved on it. Appropriately enough, the fireplace houses a monitor that displays an image of flickering burning logs.

* DagwoodSandwich: After seeing a burger where the buns were replaced with grilled cheese sandwiches, Colbert contemplated a grilled cheese sandwich where the bread was replaced with grilled cheese sandwiches... ''ad infinitum''. "Prepare yourselves nation, for I have invented... [[CrowningMomentOfFunny The Mobius Melt]]", a sandwich that you theoretically cannot stop eating. He then recalls his other favorite fractal sandwich, the "Mandelbrot BLT -- the more you zoom in, the more bacon there is. What will explode first, your heart, or your mind?"

** Also had one when Jimmy Fallon got his revenge on Stephen. Initially, Stephen claimed that Jimmy would match the $26,000 auction price for Stephen's portrait (which went to charity clearinghouse Donors Choose), and donate the money to Donors Choose. Jimmy replied that he had never said such a thing. Rather than turn it into another mock feud, Jimmy instead challenged viewers of both shows to donate $26,000 within a week to Donors Choose. If so, then Jimmy claimed Stephen would come on ''Late Night With Creator/JimmyFallon'' and sing [[CoveredUp Rebecca Black's "Friday"]] with The Roots. Stephen's response: WTF?!...and he later did go on Fallon's show and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome and sing the song.]]

* ScrewedByTheLawyers: ** On March 6, 2014, Stephen did a segment discussing the centennial anniversary of "Happy Birthday to You", but couldn't sing it because it was copyrighted (as the result of a lawsuit, the song has since been declared public domain, and Stephen, now hosting ''[[Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert The Late Show]]'', has sung it since). Instead, he premiered his new "royalty-free birthday song": in typical Colbert fashion, it's sung to the tune of "The Star-Spangled Banner".

** During the WritersStrike of 2007, when Colbert would go on the air without his writing staff, he would deliberately refer to the show as "The Col'''bert''' Re'''port'''" as a sign of solidarity with his writers.

* MeanCharacterNiceActor: Stephen Colbert is a {{Jerkass}} in character, but out of character, he's very much a NiceGuy.

* NiceGuy: Real-life Stephen. A suspiciously high proportion of interviews with him include some variation on "nicest man in the world", and his main worry when the show was pitched was that he wouldn't be able to handle [[MeanCharacterNiceActor playing an asshole]].

* {{Nerdgasm}}: Stephen had a four-day Nerdgasm in December 2012 in the form of "Hobbit Week", celebrating the release of ''Film/TheHobbitAnUnexpectedJourney'', in which he interviewed Creator/IanMcKellen, Creator/MartinFreeman, Creator/AndySerkis, and Creator/PeterJackson--in which he seemed genuinely excited to talk--and decked out the whole set in Tolkien paraphernalia. There was probably [[ProductPlacement some kind of deal involved]], but no doubt [[OneOfUs Stephen]] (described by Jackson as "the biggest Tolkien geek I have ever met") would have done it regardless.

** [[KoreanPopMusic Korean pop star]] Creator/{{Rain}}, who became Stephen's arch-nemesis due to [[AlwaysSomeoneBetter taking cruel pleasure in beating him at things]].

* MustHaveCaffeine: Colbert's... [[FetishFuel interesting]] relationship with coffee.

** Also a brief ImagineSpot where the Colbert Report apparently went into [[SugarWiki Sweet Mode]], pink shirt, big smile, the works. [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/imth2d/the-colbert-report-threatdown---happiness Can be seen at the end of this clip]]

** StephenHawking is such an A-hole.

** "{{MSNBC}} host, and talking block of smoked gouda, Ed Schultz."

* KickTheDog: In an effort to be declared the Worst Person in the World by [[KeithOlbermann Olbermann]], Stephen slapped a baby with a puppy. [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/7avxb3/the-colbert-report-stephen-wants-to-be-the-worst-person-in-the-world Could have been seen here]] if it wasn't for the fact that there was an unfortunate technical mishap preventing anyone from seeing it happen.

** When Ricky Martin came out as gay, Stephen showed that he's a longtime Martin fan by playing a (fake) clip of himself as a local news anchor. In the clip, Stephen mentions "She Bangs," which was recorded in 2000, as a "new song." Stephen actually joined ''Series/TheDailyShow'' in 1997, suggesting there may be some overlap between his fake past and his time on the show.

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former Daily Show correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than ''The Colbert Report'' 's focus on mainstream cable news pundits such as Bill O'Reilly.[[/note]]

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former Daily Show correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than ''The Colbert Report'''s focus on mainstream cable news pundits such as Bill O'Reilly.[[/note]]

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former Daily Show correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona. [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than the Colbert Report's focus on mainstream cable news pundits.[[/note]]

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015. In September 2017, the show received a SpiritualSuccessor in the form of ''Series/TheOppositionWithJordanKlepper'', another show hosted by a former Daily Show correspondent who takes on a faux-conservative persona [[note]]though ''The Opposition'' parodies alt-right media sources such as Alex Jones rather than the Colbert Report's focus on mainstream cable news pundits.[[/note]]

The ''Colbert Report'' ended on December 18, 2014, with Stephen succeeding Creator/DavidLetterman as host of ''Series/TheLateShow'' with ''Series/TheLateShowWithStephenColbert'', which premiered in September 2015. Fellow ''Daily Show'' alum Creator/LarryWilmore took the ''Colbert Report'''s spot with his own spinoff ''Series/TheNightlyShow'', which premiered in January 2015.

* YesButWhatDoesZataproximetacineDO: Parodied in the "Cheating Death" segments (which open with a ChessWithDeath sequence where Stephen distracts Death and moves the pieces), where Colbert advertises sponsor Prescott Pharmaceuticals' cure-all drug whose name is usually a variant on "Vaxadrine." SideEffectsInclude "minor heart explosions", "speaking in tongues", "braintooth", "tracheal meerkat colonies", "carcassing", "ADHDEAD", "[[ShoutOut Mind of Mencia]]", and "involuntary [[Literature/TheChroniclesOfNarnia Narnia]] adventures". Also growth of teeth.[[note]]Often in your mouth![[/note]]
** When going through a (mock) vetting by UsefulNotes/BillClinton vetter Cliff Sloan in an attempt to get a position on UsefulNotes/BarackObama's cabinet, [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/hjm6c3/the-colbert-report-stephen-s-vetting-process---cliff-sloan-pt--2 Stephen is taken to task for these endorsements]].

* TwoDecadesBehind: In the April 26, 2012 episode, Stephen talks about how he can relate to youth much better than Obama. He says things like "Turn off your {{Atari}}, Obama, because the game is over" and "They know I'm young because I always carry around a full deck of TabletopGame/YuGiOh cards and I love the Power Rangers."