History Quotes / MooseAndMapleSyrup

-> ''There's a knock on the door''
-> '''Chase Claypool''' Come in! ''[Alvin Kamara, Patrick Mahomes, Matt Nagy, and Rodrigo Blankenship all angrily glare at him]'' Oh, sorry, Canadian reflex.
-->-- ''WebAnimation/GridironHeights''

->''Canadians are weird.]]''

-->-- "Blame Canada", '''''WesternAnimation/SouthParkBiggerLongerAndUncut'''''

-->-- '''Creator/WilliamGibson''', ''Literature/SpookCountry''

->Toronto is just like New York, but without all the stuff.

->Canada: [[RunningGag the country you think about so little.]] [[BaitAndSwitch That's it]], [[TakeThat end of sentence.]]

-->-- '''Joni Mitchell''', "Dreamland"

->If you die in Canada, you die in REAL LIFE!
-->-- ''[[http://xkcd.com/180/ Canada]]'', ''Webcomic/{{xkcd}}''

->The fact that Rob Ford isn't American. God, I want him to be American so very badly. Can't we adopt him? He belongs here.

->As a Canadian person, I’m sure my brain would explode ''{{Film/Scanners}}''-style if I replaced “I’m sorry” with “No. Fuck. Jesus.”

->O Canada, you're so adorable with your maple syrup and hockey and 'Eh's and moose. You're like North America's great big fuzzy John Candy-shaped teddy bear.

->Canadians tend to get a bad rap, because Americans are more or less in charge of the world and we're jerks like that. Whenever we need affordable prescriptions, or a place to crash for a few years when they start the draft up, you're always there... and we've been less than gracious. We make fun of your flag, your baseball teams, the way you talk, and the fact that you're part French... sorry about that, honestly (er, the making fun of you part, [[BackhandedApology not the French part]]).

->If at the end of the Miss Universe pageant, all of the losers took off their heels and beat Creator/DonaldTrump with them, that would be the best part of the entire competition. That doesn’t happen, so the best part of the pageant is the National Costume contest, which went down in Miami last night.\\\

Allison should be proud of her home country today, because they broke the budget by throwing as much props as possible on top of Miss Canada. If UsefulNotes/MarieAntoinette moved to Canada, fell in love with a hockey-obsessed traveller and married him, this is what she would wear on her wedding day...She looks like the queen in The Sports Network’s version of ''Series/GameOfThrones'' called ''Game of Hockey Sticks''. The only way this costume could’ve been more hockey crazy is if she shot pucks out of her crotch at the judges.

->I like to imagine that Wolverine was wanted for questioning in regards to the murder of his father, and got the hell out of Canada in order to avoid being put in Igloo Jail (or whatever they have up there) by the Mounties. As anyone who watched Wrestling/{{WWF}} in the ’90s will no doubt recall, [[ForeignWrestlingHeel the Mountie always gets his man.]]

->Buzz, aptly nicknamed for his apparent tipsiness during his promo, tried his hand at cheerleading for WWE and “our space program” (the United States’ that is)... That didn’t stop the astronaut from trying to ingratiate himself to the Canadian audience, though, accidentally damning the country with the faintest of praise. The Toronto fans should have been grateful to hear that Canadian engineers built the landing gear on the Apollo 11 lunar lander, but no. No one ever cared about astronauts anyway; back in the 60s, [[DamnedByFaintPraise every little boy wanted to grow up to be a landing gear technician!]] The fans in attendance, thinking Aldrin was turning heel on them, booed poor Buzz, even after his enthusiastic exclamation of, 'Woo. How 'bout that?'

->No one thinks of Canada as a hotbed of urban music. Canada let ''Tom Green'' have a rap career up there. ([[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer That's true.]]) We as Americans have this impression of Canada as this clean, magical place without poverty, crime, major cities, or any other culture besides boring white people...You say you come from the 'mean streets of Canada', unless you mean you took some rough checks in hockey, Americans [[PretenderDiss will just laugh.]]

->My election platform was to build a giant robot sawblade that would cut Canada off the top and then attach it to Australia so they wouldn't bother us anymore.
-->-- [[PresidentEvil President-Elect]] '''[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Dr. Insano]]'''

->America gets a bad rap for having a lot of rude people. Canada, not so much. But that's just the world's perception. Believe me when I say that we have rude people in Canada. The only difference, is that, you know, we apologize for it. [[ApologisesALot We pretty much apologize for everything]].
-->-- The Canadian WebVideo/MatthewSantoro

->It's so clean and bland! I'm ''home!''

->[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KvcQNeI53g Canadians are weird.]]

->Canada, a country covered with snows and ices eight months of the year, inhabited by barbarians, bears and beavers.

->I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.

->I get to go to overseas places, like [[GlobalIgnorance Canada.]]

->You are the kindest country in the world. You are like a really nice apartment over a meth lab.

->Lovely people, Canadians. Gentle, civilized, beautiful people. 'Til you give 'em a hockey puck. Then they lose their ''freaking minds!'' I don't know why the Canadian Army bothers with tanks and guns and shit. They should just give the guys hockey sticks. 'There you are, boys. The Taliban is the puck.

->Remember, Canada is bigger and it's on top. If this were prison, the USA would be Canada's bitch.
-->-- '''Rick Mercer'''

->I don’t want to live in a country [[PoliticalCorrectnessGoneMad where no one ever says anything that offends anyone]]. That’s why we have Canada.

->The Canadians are a people of the [[TrueNeutral extreme centre]]. They have not been averse to the quiet life...nor keen to spend more money on defense or effort abroad.

->They are lucky we allow them to [[FeelingOppressedByTheirExistence exist on the same continent.]]

->...for most Americans, Canada is sort of like a case of latent arthritis. We really don't think about it, unless it acts up.

->The Great White North, CANADA! where you can enjoy a beautiful train ride, and go back to freezing cold temperatures, Hockey, Canadian bacon, Hockey, bears, [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment Hockey]], maple syrup, more bears, [[OverlyLongGag Hockey]]......wait, [[DontExplainTheJoke Did I mention Hockey]]?

->The tragedy of Canada is that they could have enjoyed French cuisine, British culture, and American technology.\\\
Instead, they got British cuisine, American culture, and French technology.

->The only thing more Canadian than rioting after a hockey game is apologizing for it for two weeks afterwards

We got stronger beer\\

->The Great White North, CANADA! where you can enjoy a beautiful train ride, and go back to freezing cold temperatures, Hockey, Canadian bacon, [[SoGoodWeMentionedItTwice Hockey]], bears, [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment Hockey]], maple syrup, more bears, [[OverlyLongGag Hockey]]......wait, [[DontExplainTheJoke Did I mention Hockey]]?

->''It's C-A-N-A-D-A, eh? Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh!''

-->-- '''Ezekiel''', ''WesternAnimation/TotalDrama''

-->-- President-Elect '''[[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Dr. Insano]]'''

-->-- '''Robin Scherbatsky Sr.''', ''Series/HowIMeYourMother'', "[[Recap/HowIMetYourMotherS8E13BandOrDJ Band or DJ?]]"

-->'''Stern Canadian Mountie''', ''ComicBook/TheSimpsons''

[[folder:Film]]

-->--"Blame Canada", '''''WesternAnimation/SouthParkBiggerLongerAndUncut'''''

-->--''Film/CanadianBacon''

-->-- '''''Literature/TheDevilsDictionary'''''

-->--'''Creator/WilliamGibson''', ''Literature/SpookCountry''

-->--'''Music/WeirdAlYankovic''', "Canadian Idiot"

-->--'''BJ Snowden''', ''In Canada''

--> -- Music/JonLajoie, "WTF Collective 2"

-->--'''[[http://www.gq.com/blogs/the-feed/2013/11/make-it-stop-the-worst-of-the-week-of-110813.html Drew Magary]]''', ''Make It Stop''

-->--'''''[[http://dlisted.com/2015/07/13/kristen-stewart-says-that-getting-older-has-made-her-calmer/ DListed]]''''' on Creator/KristenStewart

-->--'''''{{Website/Cracked}}''''', [[http://www.cracked.com/article_20301_the-5-most-secretly-badass-countries.html "The 5 Most Secretly Badass Countries"]]

-->--'''''Blog/ToplessRobot''''', [[http://www.toplessrobot.com/2012/09/canadas_10_greatest_contributions_to_nerd-dom_1.php "10 Great Canadian Contributions of Nerd-Dom"]]

-->--'''[[http://dlisted.com/2015/01/22/miss-canadas-hockey-wonderland-miss-universe-costume-is-a-thing-of-beauty/ Michael K.]]''', "Miss Canada’s Hockey Wonderland Miss Universe Costume Is A Thing Of Beauty"

-->--'''Chris Sims''' [[http://comicsalliance.com/comicsalliance-reviews-x-men-origins-wolverine-2009-part-o on]] ''Film/XMenOriginsWolverine''

-->-- '''''Website/{{Wrestlecrap}}''''', [[http://www.wrestlecrap.com/inductions/raw-is-aldrin/ "Raw is Aldrin"]]

->'''Mike''': Wolverine was a member of ComicBook/AlphaFlight, which is like the Canadian version of the Avengers or X-Men.\\
'''Jay''': When he's stabbing people, does he keep apologizing? Since they're Canadian?\\
'''Mike''': [stoned-faced] [[HaHaHaNo Ha.]]
-->--'''''WebVideo/HalfInTheBag''''' on ''Film/XMenApocalypse''

-->--'''WebVideo/ToddInTheShadows''' on Snow, ''One Hit Wonderland''

-->--'''Marge Simpson''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', "The Bart Wants What It Wants"

-->--''WesternAnimation/GodTheDevilAndBob'', "Andy Runs Away"

-->--'''Creator/JonStewart'''

-->--'''Music/BritneySpears'''

-->--'''Creator/CraigFerguson'''

-->--'''Rick Mercer'''

-->--'''UsefulNotes/MargaretThatcher'''

-->--'''Ann Coulter'''

-->--'''Pat Buchanan'''

-->''[[Creator/FoxNewsChannel Red Eye]]''

-> The only thing more Canadian than rioting after a hockey game is apologizing for it for two weeks afterwards

'''Brad:''' [[CanadaEh The huskies running our generators]] are ''sweating!''

->Canada: the country you think about so little. That's it, end of sentence.
-->-- '''Creator/JohnOliver''', ''Series/LastWeekTonightWithJohnOliver''

''Trevor Noah:''' Damn. You - you may not have picked it up, but that's Canadian for, "You MOTHERF*CKER!"

'''Justin Trudeau:''' Let me be clear: these tariffs are totally unacceptable. We have to believe that at some point, common sense will prevail. But we see no sign of that in this action today, by the US administration.

-->-- ''Doubled-Edged Sword'', ''Series/ThirtyRock''

->I like to imagine that Wolverine was wanted for questioning in regards to the murder of his father, and got the hell out of Canada in order to avoid being put in Igloo Jail (or whatever they have up there) by the Mounties. As anyone who watched {{WWF}} in the ’90s will no doubt recall, [[ForeignWrestlingHeel the Mountie always gets his man.]]

-->--'''ToddInTheShadows''' on Snow, ''One Hit Wonderland''

-->-- '''ShawnMichaels''' to the Hart Dynasty, eh?

-->--John Robert Colombo

--> Most popular Twitter repost following the 2011 Vancouver hockey riot.

->Canada, the country you think about so little. That's it, end of sentence.

-->--'''Marge Simpson''', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons''