History Quotes / ImprobableAimingSkills

-->--'''Wade Wilson''', ''Film/{{Deadpool|2016}}''

->''"His training in the martial arts has made Creator/StevenSeagal into a deadly shot. He becomes one with the bullet and the two of them form a zen team... only, [[{{Metaphorgotten}} one of them is still a bullet.]] It sounds like bullshit, I know. Applying ancient Eastern teachings to firearm training kills 500 karate men a day. But Seagal made it work. He seriously, on camera, shoots the cotton off of Q-tips. Bang-- that's how Officer Seagal tests a DNA swab. '''The Verdict: [[CowboyCop Dead]].'''"''
-->--'''{{Creator/Seanbaby}}''', [[http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-7-super-powers-of-steven-seagal-lawman/#ixzz31rCQFvPB "The 7 Super Powers That Steven Seagal Actually Believes He Has"]]

->"Nigel, do you-" Kissan's words died in his lips as he saw Nigel slumped in his seat, and standing beside the bike, leveling a pistol his way-

->The Nod biker was a hundred meters away, with a dozen Nod soldiers between him and the man by Nigel's bike. [[TakeThat A normal soldier, straight out of boot on his first day, would never have made that kind of shot with a pistol. Even an experienced target shooter might find it difficult.]] [[note]] This scenario is lifted from the official ''Tiberium Wars'' novelisation, in which a normal soldier straight out of boot on his first day did in fact make such a shot with a pistol.[[/note]]

->But that was why they called him [[ColonelBadass "Havoc."]]

->Kissan's visor shattered, his head snapped back, and he toppled out of his motorcycle as the rest of the ambushed Nod militia found themselves under fire from multiple directions by a superior number of GDI troops.
-->'''[[Fanfic/TiberiumWars Tiberium Wars]]'''

-> '''Harry''': I saw you during the fight at Wrigley, Kincaid. You fired a dozen shots, on the move and dodging bad guys the whole time.
-> '''Kincaid''': What's so supernatural about that?
-> '''Harry''': In a fight, [[{{Muggle}} just plain folks]] miss sometimes. Maybe most times. You didn't miss once.
-> '''Kincaid''': What's the point of shooting if you're just going to miss?
-->--''Literature/TheDresdenFiles: Literature/BloodRites''

-> '''Captain Amelia''': Did you actually aim for that?
-> '''Dr. Doppler''': You know, actually, I ''did.''
-->-- ''WesternAnimation/TreasurePlanet''

-> '''Jayne Cobb:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext "Saint Jayne" has a nice ring to it, though.]]\\

--> -- "Objects in Space," ''Series/{{Firefly}}''

->''Shoot the wings off the flies.''
-->--'''Sloan''', ''{{Film/Wanted}}''

->''Hiding won't help you! I understand the bullets, you see... I make them go where I want.''
-->--'''Revolver Ovelot''', ''VideoGame/MetalGearSolid''

->"Bet you can't put it through the eye."
->"Left or right?"
-->--[[http://gatherer.wizards.com/Pages/Card/Details.aspx?multiverseid=135186 Femeref Archers]], ''TabletopGame/MagicTheGathering''

->''Their precision is legendary. [[EliteMooks The Yu-Yan Archers]] can pin a fly to a tree from a hundred yards away. '''Without killing it'''''.
-->--'''Zhao''', ''WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender''

->There was a high-pitched whine like a Colt .45 in a {{spaghetti western}}. With a speed and accuracy that only comes from cybernetic hand-eye co-ordination and a computer-controlled aiming system, Seven fired three times from the hip, cutting them down in an instant.
-->-- ''A Fistful of Mammary Gland''

->''It takes a good marksman to shoot you at 50 feet from a moving car, but it takes a great marksman to miss... while making it look like they are trying to hit you. Or markswoman, as the case may be.''
-->--'''Michael Westen''', ''Series/BurnNotice''

->'''Aimee Matchlock:''' Guess I was already pushing my luck from this range, huh? [...] So ya figure we just wait 'til they drag their butts over here to finish the job?\\
'''Angelo OVO Panetonne:''' ...Why not? [[UpToEleven You nearly took them out from across an ocean]]. At close range, they're as good as dead.
-->-- ''VideoGame/BravelySecond''

->''"When I was 19, I did a guy in Laos from a thousand yards out. It was a rifle shot in high wind. Maybe eight or even ten guys in the world could have made that shot. It's the only thing I was ever good at."''
-->--'''Martin Riggs''', ''Film/LethalWeapon1987''

-->''VideoGame/BravelySecond''

-->-- ''Disney/TreasurePlanet''

-->--'''Wade Wilson''', ''Film/{{Deadpool}}''

->The Nod biker was a hundred meters away, with a dozen Nod soldiers between him and the man by Nigel's bike. [[TakeThat A normal soldier, straight out of boot on his first day, would never have made that kind of shot with a pistol. Even an experienced target shooter might find it difficult.]] [[note]] This scenario is lifted from the official ''Tiberium Wars'' novelisation, in which a normal soldier straight out of boot on his first day did in face make such a shot with a pistol.[[/note]]

-->-- '''MarkTwain''', "Literature/FenimoreCoopersLiteraryOffences"

-->-- '''MarkTwain''', "FenimoreCoopersLiteraryOffences"

->''"His training in the martial arts has made StevenSeagal into a deadly shot. He becomes one with the bullet and the two of them form a zen team... only, [[{{Metaphorgotten}} one of them is still a bullet.]] It sounds like bullshit, I know. Applying ancient Eastern teachings to firearm training kills 500 karate men a day. But Seagal made it work. He seriously, on camera, shoots the cotton off of Q-tips. Bang-- that's how Officer Seagal tests a DNA swab. '''The Verdict: [[CowboyCop Dead]].'''"''

->The Nod biker was a hundred meters away, with a dozen Nod soldiers between him and the man by Nigel's bike. [[TakeThat A normal soldier, straight out of boot on his first day, would never have made that kind of shot with a pistol. Even an experienced target shooter might find it difficult.]]

-->-- ''TreasurePlanet''

-->--''Sloan'', ''{{Film/Wanted}}''

->''"Shoot the wings off the flies."''
-->--''Sloan'', Wanted

----

->''Shoot the wings off the flies.''
-->--''Sloan'', [[Film/Wanted ''Wanted'']]

----

'''Shepard Derria Book:''' I'm just trying to think how many miracles you've performed.\\

-->--''TheDresdenFiles: Blood Rites''

-->-- '''MarkTwain''', "FenimoreCoopersLiteraryOffences"

-->-- ''TreasurePlanet''

-->--''TheDresdenFiles: Blood Rites''

-> '''Harry''': In a fight, just plain folks miss sometimes. Maybe most times. You didn't miss once.

-->'''[[Fanfic/TiberiumWars Tiberium Wars]]'''