History Quotes / DastardlyWhiplash

->''"Oh, you're up. Goody. We can start your history lesson. Long before there were [[{{Supervillain}}loud-mouthed buff guys in spandex]], there was the Gentleman Villain. His favorite sinister act was this: [[ChainedToARailway tying someone to a train track]]. It's simple, inexpensive, personal, and deadly. [[BaitTheDog But it gives you a little hope]]. [[HopeSpot Maybe you'll escape]]. ''[muffled shouting from Blind Rage]'' '''Lesson's not over, sonny!''' Now, the Gentleman Villain had these old-school [[TimeBomb time bombs]] -- three sticks of dynamite wired to an alarm clock. And what was so poetic about that is that they'' ticked! ''You could'' hear ''them. Tick, tick, tick! Nowadays, they're just digital. No sound, no peril. ''[sound of a train approaching]'' Oh. Oh, ho, ho! Do you hear that?'' There's ''the ticking. The train is coming! Is it on this track? Tick, tick, tick. Maybe it's on the other track. '''Tick, tick, tick!''' ''[EvilLaugh]'' Not bad for an old man, huh? I'm gonna get going and let you try to escape. And if you do, tell the Peril Partnership that the Guild isn't scared of punks. If you don't? Eh... sorry."''

->''"Oh, you're up. Goody. We can start your history lesson. Long before there were loud-mouthed buff guys in Spandex, there was the Gentleman Villain. His favorite sinister act was this: [[ChainedToARailway tying someone to a train track]]. It's simple, inexpensive, personal, and deadly. But it gives you a little hope. Maybe you'll escape. ''[muffled shouting from Blind Rage]'' '''Lesson's not over, sonny!''' Now, the Gentleman Villain had these old-school [[TimeBomb time bombs]] -- three sticks of dynamite wired to an alarm clock. And what was so poetic about that is that they'' ticked! ''You could hear them! Tick, tick, tick! Nowadays, they're just digital. No sound, no peril. ''[sound of a train approaching]'' Oh? Oh, ho, ho! Do you hear that? There's the ticking. The train is coming! Is it on this track? Tick, tick, tick. Maybe it's on the other track. '''Tick, tick, tick!''' ''[EvilLaugh]'' Not bad for an old man, huh? I'm gonna get going and let you try to escape. And if you do, tell the Peril Partnership that the Guild isn't scared of punks. If you don't? Eh, well... sorry."''

'''Scrooge:''' Which is the bad guy? If only one had a blasted moustache!

Genius steeped in burglars, murderers\\

->''One thing I will credit the blighter with: his sense of spectacle was perfect. “Ah, Mister [=MacDonald=]!” he cried, menacingly twirling the [[InSpace antichemwar vibrissae glued to his upper lip]].''

"Curses!" he cried -- [[PronounTrouble Hardman, not the cat]] -- "I am foiled in my plot to get the farm and the girl!"

->''"Oh, you're up. Goody. We can start your history lesson. Long before there were loud-mouthed buff guys in Spandex, there was the Gentleman Villain. His favorite sinister act was this: [[ChainedToARailway tying someone to a train track]]. It's simple, inexpensive, personal, and deadly. But it gives you a little hope. Maybe you'll escape. ''[muffled shouting from Blind Rage]'' Lesson's not over, sonny! Now, the Gentleman Villain had these old-school [[TimeBomb time bombs]] -- three sticks of dynamite wired to an alarm clock. And what was so poetic about that is that they ticked! You could hear them! Tick, tick, tick! Nowadays, they're just digital. No sound, no peril. ''[sound of a train approaching]'' Oh? Oh, ho, ho! Do you hear that? There's the ticking. The train is coming. Is it on this track? Tick, tick, tick. Maybe it's on the other track. Tick, tick, tick! ''[EvilLaugh]'' Not bad for an old man, huh? I'm gonna get going and let you try to escape. And if you do, tell the Peril Partnership that the Guild isn't scared of punks. If you don't? Eh, well... sorry."''