History Quotes / CMPunk

''This sign right here says "CM Punk is my hero", you can call me that. This sign here says [[Wrestling/{{Danhausen}} "Pepsi Phil"]], you can call me that. This sign here says [[TheLastOfTheseIsNotLikeTheOthers "CM Junk"]], you can call me that. Boo me, cheer me, love me, hate me, you all do it because you know I'm right! You can call me whatever you want, you know what [[Creator/WarnerBrosDiscovery David Zaslav]] calls me? "One Bill Phill." That's because I am the one true genuine article in a business full of [[TakeThat counterfeit]] [[Wrestling/TheYoungBucks bucks!]]''\\

''"Now Roman might not be here, but his cousins are. Solo. Big, tough son of a gun that I don't know. But I'm familiar with his cousin, [[Wrestling/TheUsos Jimmy Uso]]. By the way, shout out to [[Wrestling/TheUsos 'Main Event' Jey Uso]], who's over on Monday Night Raw. I see you, Uce! These are the things that I have to wrestle with. Do I wanna go to Monday Night Raw and hang out with Jey Uso or do I wanna stay here on [=SmackDown=] and scrap with Jimmy Uso? But if I scrap with Jimmy Uso, holy gosh, he's got a lot of cousins. [[Wrestling/SamoanDynasty I'm talking like endless Samoans, right?]]''"\\
->''"So if I scrap with him, I'm gonna need backup, and they're in tag team action tonight.Can I trust a guy who I have history with, who hears voices in his head? Can I tag with [[Wrestling/RandyOrton Randy Orton?]] I don't know, are we gonna get along? Are we not gonna get along? It'll probably be entertaining either way, right? One guy, I'm pretty positive that would tag with me is Randy's partner tonight and his name is:''''\\

->''"Yeah, we're having fun and I'm so glad to be back home on this journey with you all. We're gonna find out exactly where I sign on Monday night and I'm here to listen to you all and I've heard you all. I'm here to listen to Nick Aldis. Over the weekend, I got a phone call scheduled with [[Wrestling/ShawnMichaels the heartbreak kid, Shawn Michaels]]. I'm gonna talk to him about [[Wrestling/WWENXT NXT]]. And then on Monday Night in Cleveland, I'm gonna hear what Adam Pearce has to say. And I promise you, I will make my decision then. Almost ten years to the day in the same town, I walked out of this place in. All the men that I have mentioned today have one glaring, painful thing in common and that's CM Punk is back and I am the monkey wrench in their future plans and their future goals.''"

->''"Everybody wanting to talk about finishing their story. [[Main/HesBack I'm back to finish what I started]]. And Monday Night, I put pen to paper and begin my journey of finishing my story and that means one thing: '''[[Main/MicDrop Main eventing Wrestlemania]].'''''''

->''"I've got good news, ladies and gentlemen. It's the top of the 9 o'clock our and that means I'm not the end of the show. I'm not gonna get my time cut, you wanna chant? You go ahead and chant!"''\\

-->-- '''[[https://youtu.be/D3q6vXUw_3g AEW Collision Episode 1]], June 17, 2023.'''

Oh hey, let me get something straight: Those of you who are cheering me right now, [[CheapHeat you are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else]]! Because you're the ones who are sipping on those collector cups right now. You're the ones that buy those programs that my face isn't on the cover of. And then at 5 in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face and get an autograph and try to sell it on Website/EBay because you're too lazy to go get a real job.\\

'''Punk:''' ''(interrupting)'' It's not his position to make it very fucking clear. There's [[Wrestling/TheYoungBucks people who call]] [[Wrestling/KennyOmega themselves EVPs]] that should've fucking known better. This shit was none of their business. I understand sticking up for your fucking friends, I fucking get it. I stuck up for that guy more that anybody, OK? I paid his bills, until I didn't, and it was my decision not to--\\

-->--'''from [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2W6O539ptQ the post-match press conference]] after All Out 2022'''

'''Punk:''' So you're ''not'' friends with him? Oh, wow. Well, that makes two of us. My point is, you fancy yourself a journalist, even if it's for the silly world of professional wrestling and you have journalistic integrity. People who report things, mostly that are bullshit and slanderous lies against myself, if you are friends with somebody who blew my spot, if you're not friends with them, I apologize. But you should probably disclose who you're friends with. I haven't had anything to do with Scott Colton in almost a decade. Probably wanted nothing to do with him even longer than that. It's fucking unfortunate that I have to come up here and speak on this when I'm on my time and this is a fucking business. Uh, why I'm a grown ass adult man and I decide not to be friends with somebody is nobody else's fucking business. But my friends, if I fall backwards, will catch me. Scott Colton, I felt, never would have. My problem was, I wanted to bring a guy with me to the top that did not want to see me at the top, OK? You call it jealousy, you call it envy, whatever the fuck it is. My relationship with Scott Colton ended long before I paid all of his bills. I have every receipt, I have every invoice, I have every email. I have the email where he says, and I quote, "I agree to go our separate ways. I will get my own lawyer and you do not have to pay anymore." That's an email that I have, and the only reason the public did not see it is because when I finally had to countersue him through discovery, we discovered he shared a bank account with his mother. That's a fact. And as soon as we discovered that fact and we subpoenaed old Marsha, he sent the email "Oh, can we please drop all this?" Now, it's 2022, I haven't been friends with this guy since at least 2014, late 2013, and the fact that I have to sit up here because we have irresponsible people who call themselves EVPs and couldn't fucking manage a Target, and they spread lies and bullshit, and put into the media that I got somebody fired when I have fuck all to do with him, want nothing to do with him, do not care where he works, where he doesn't work, where he eats, where he sleeps, and the fact that I have to get up here and do this in 2022 is fucking embarrassing! And if y'all are at fault, fuck you. If you're not, I apologize. But, what did I ever do in this world to deserve an empty-headed fucking dumbfuck like [[Wrestling/AdamPage "Hangman" Adam Page]] to go out on national television and fucking go into business for himself, for what? What did I do, Dave [Meltzer]? What did I ever do? Didn't do a goddamn thing.\\

'''Punk:''' So you're ''not'' friends with him? Oh, wow. Well, that makes two of us. My point is, if you fancy yourself a journalist, even if it's for the silly world of professional wrestling and you have journalistic integrity. People who report things, mostly that are bullshit and slanderous lies against myself, if you are friends with somebody who blew my spot, if you're not friends with them, I apologize. But you should probably disclose who you're friends with. I haven't had anything to do with Scott Colton in almost a decade. Probably wanted nothing to do with him even longer than that. It's fucking unfortunate that I have to come up here and speak on this when I'm on my time and this is a fucking business. Uh, why I'm a grown ass adult man and I decide not to be friends with somebody is nobody else's fucking business. But my friends, if I fall backwards, will catch me. Scott Colton, I felt, never would have. My problem was, I wanted to bring a guy with me to the top that did not want to see me at the top, OK? You call it jealousy, you call it envy, whatever the fuck it is. My relationship with Scott Colton ended long before I paid all of his bills. I have every receipt, I have every invoice, I have every email. I have the email where he says, and I quote, "I agree to go our separate ways. I will get my own lawyer and you do not have to pay anymore." That's an email that I have, and the only reason the public did not see it is because when I finally had to countersue him through discovery, we discovered he shared a bank account with his mother. That's a fact. And as soon as we discovered that fact and we subpoenaed old Marsha, he sent the email "Oh, can we please drop all this?" Now, it's 2022, I haven't been friends with this guy since at least 2014, late 2013, and the fact that I have to sit up here because we have irresponsible people who call themselves EVPs and couldn't fucking manage a Target, and they spread lies and bullshit, and put into the media that I got somebody fired when I have fuck all to do with him, want nothing to do with him, do not care where he works, where he doesn't work, where he eats, where he sleeps, and the fact that I have to get up here and do this in 2022 is fucking embarrassing! And if y'all are at fault, fuck you. If you're not, I apologize. But, what did I ever do in this world to deserve an empty-headed fucking dumbfuck like [[Wrestling/AdamPage "Hangman" Adam Page]] to go out on national television and fucking go into business for himself, for what? What did I do, Dave [Meltzer]? What did I ever do? Didn't do a goddamn thing.\\

-->--'''from the post-match press conference after All Out 2022'''

'''Punk:''' So you're ''not'' friends with him? Oh, wow. Well, that makes two of us. My point is, if you fancy yourself a journalist, even if it's for the silly world of professional wrestling and you have journalistic integrity. People who report things, mostly that are bullshit and slanderous lies against myself, if you are friends with somebody who blew my spot, if you're not friends with them, I apologize. But you should probably disclose who you're friends with. I haven't had anything to do with Scott Colton in almost a decade. Probably wanted nothing to do with him even longer than that. It's fucking unfortunate that I have to come up here and speak on this when I'm on my time and this is a fucking business. Uh, why I'm a grown ass adult man and I decide not to be friends with somebody is nobody else's fucking business. But my friends, if I fall backwards, will catch me. Scott Colton, I felt, never would have. My problem was, I wanted to bring a guy with me to the top that did not want to see me at the top, OK? You call it jealousy, you call it envy, whatever the fuck it is. My relationship with Scott Colton ended long before I paid all of his bills. I have every receipt, I have every invoice, I have every email. I have the email where he says, and I quote, "I agree to go our separate ways. I will get my own lawyer and you do not have to pay anymore." That's an email that I have, and the only reason the public did not see it is because when I finally had to countersue him through discovery, we discovered he shared a bank account with his mother. That's a fact. And as soon as we discovered that fact and we subpoenaed old Marsha, he sent the email "Oh, can we please drop all this?" Now, it's 2022, I haven't been friends with this guy since at least 2014, late 2013, and the fact that I have to sit up here because we have irresponsible-- who call themselves EVP's and couldn't fucking manage a Target, and they spread lies and bullshit, and put into the media that I got somebody fired when I have fuck all to do with him, want nothing to do with him, do not care where he works, where he doesn't work, where he eats, where he sleeps, and the fact that I have to get up here and do this in 2022 is fucking embarrassing! And if y'all are at fault, fuck you. If you're not, I apologize. But, what did I ever do in this world to deserve an empty-headed fucking dumbfuck like [[Wrestling/AdamPage "Hangman" Adam Page]] to go out on national television and fucking go into business for himself, for what? What did I do, Dave [Meltzer]? What did I ever do? Didn't do a goddamn thing.\\

'''Punk:''' So you're ''not'' friends with him? Oh, wow. Well, that makes two of us. My point is, if you fancy yourself a journalist, even if it's for the silly world of professional wrestling and you have journalistic integrity. People who report things, mostly that are bullshit and slanderous lies against myself, if you are friends with somebody who blew my spot, if you're not friends with them, I apologize. But you should probably disclose who you're friends with. I haven't had anything to do with Scott Colton in almost a decade. Probably wanted nothing to do with him even longer than that. It's fucking unfortunate that I have to come up here and speak on this when I'm on my time and this is a fucking business. Uh, why I'm a grown ass adult man and I decide not to be friends with somebody is nobody else's fucking business. But my friends, if I fall backwards, will catch me. Scott Colton, I felt, never would have. My problem was, I wanted to bring a guy with me to the top that did not want to see me at the top, OK? You call it jealousy, you call it envy, whatever the fuck it is. My relationship with Scott Colton ended long before I paid all of his bills. I have every receipt, I have every invoice, I have every email. I have the email where he says, and I quote, "I agree to go our separate ways. I will get my own lawyer and you do not have to pay anymore." That's an email that I have, and the only reason the public did not see it is because when I finally had to countersue him through discovery, we discovered he shared a bank account with his mother. That's a fact. And as soon as we discovered that fact and we subpoenaed old Marsha, he sent the email "Oh, can we please drop all this?" Now, it's 2022, I haven't been friends with this guy since at least 2014, late 2013, and the fact that I have to sit up here because we have irresponsible-- who call themselves EVP's and couldn't fucking manage a Target, and they spread lies and bullshit, and put into the media that I got somebody fired when I have fuck all to do with him, want nothing to do with him, do not care where he works, where he doesn't work, where he eats, where he sleeps, and the fact that I have to get up here and do this in 2022 is fucking embarrassing! And if y'all are at fault, fuck you. If you're not, I apologize. But, what did I ever do in this world to deserve an empty-headed fucking dumbfuck like "Hangman" Adam Page to go out on national television and fucking go in to business for himself, for what? What did I do, Dave [Meltzer]? What did I ever do? Didn't do a goddamn thing.\\

'''Punk:''' ''(interrupting)'' It's not his position to make it very fucking clear. There's people who call themselves EVP's that should've fucking known better. This shit was none of their business. I understand sticking up for your fucking friends, I fucking get it. I stuck up for that guy more that anybody, OK? I paid his bills, until I didn't, and it was my decision not to--\\

-->-- '''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KrZXDqREmaU AEW Rampage Episode 2: The First Dance]]'''

You see, about a year and a half ago, I was still working for a company called [[Wrestling/{{TNA}} Total Nonstop Action]]. Me and a couple of buddies of mine were told that we could no longer wrestle for Ring of Honor, so what we did, and I'll name names: myself, Wrestling/JerryLynn, [[Wrestling/AJStyles The Phenomenal AJ Styles]], and [[Wrestling/ChristopherDaniels "The Fallen Angel" Christopher Daniels]], all decided to have a little bit of a meeting late Wednesday night in Nashville, Tennessee. And I sat there and I ate my food, I looked across the table at AJ Styles, who was the [[http://www.wrestling-titles.com/nwa/world/nwa-h.html NWA World Champion]] at the time, a belt which, by the way, is nothing compared to the belt I hold in my hands right here. And I watched as AJ could barely eat his food, he certainly couldn't look me in the eye, because what we all agreed was if we stuck together, we could work for Ring of Honor, we could work for whoever we wanted. I faxed a copy of my contract to the TNA offices and highlighted the part that said I could wrestle for whoever I wanted as long as their name was not [[Wrestling/VinceMcMahon Vincent K. McMahon]] or they were running a pay-per-view. I explained myself to AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels. I said, "AJ, you hold the belt, you hold the power, you can do things, they have to listen to what you say." They looked me in the eye and they said, "We're with you, Punk, we're gonna stick together."\\

I don't hate you, John. I don’t even dislike you. I ''do'' like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this ''idea'' that you're the best. Because you're not. I'm the best. I'm the best in the world. There's one thing you're better at than I am and that’s kissing Wrestling/VinceMcMahon's ass. You're as good as kissing Vince [=McMahon's=] ass as Wrestling/HulkHogan was. I don't know if you're as good as Wrestling/{{Dwayne|Johnson}} though. He's a pretty good ass kisser. Always was and still is. Whoops! I'm BreakingTheFourthWall!''\\

''I am the best [[InsistentTerminology wrestler]] in the world. I've been the best since day one when I walked into this company. And I've been vilified and hated since that day because Wrestling/PaulHeyman saw something in me that nobody else wanted to admit. That’s right, I'm a Paul Heyman guy. You know who else was a Paul Heyman guy? Wrestling/BrockLesnar. And he split just like I'm splitting. But the biggest difference between me and Brock is I'm going to leave with the WWE Championship.\\
I've grabbed so many of Vincent K. [=McMahon's=] imaginary brass rings that it's finally dawned on me that they're just that, they’re completely imaginary. The only thing that's real is me and the fact that day in and day out, for almost six years, I have proved to everybody in the world that I am the best on this microphone, in that ring, even on commentary! Nobody can touch me! And yet no matter how many times I prove it, I'm not on your lovely little collector cups. I'm not on the cover of the program. I'm barely promoted. I don't get to be in movies. I'm certainly not on any crappy show on the Creator/USANetwork. I'm not on the poster of [=WrestleMania=]. I'm not on the signature that's produced at the start of the show. I'm not on [[Series/{{Conan}} Conan O'Brien]]. I'm not on [[Series/LateNight Jimmy Fallon]]. But the fact of the matter is, I should be. This isn't sour grapes. But the fact that Dwayne is in the main event at [=WrestleMania=] next year and I'm not makes me sick!\\
Oh hey, let me get something straight. Those of you who are cheering me right now, [[CheapHeat you are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else]]. Because you're the ones who are sipping on those collector cups right now. You're the ones that buy those programs that my face isn't on the cover of. And then at five in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face and get an autograph and try to sell it on Website/EBay because you're too lazy to go get a real job.\\
I'm leaving with the WWE Championship on July 17th. And hell, who knows, maybe I'll go defend it in Wrestling/NewJapanProWrestling. Maybe…I'll go back to Wrestling/RingOfHonor.''\\

The reason I'm leaving is you people. Because after I'm gone, you're still going to pour money into this company. I'm just a spoke on the wheel. The wheel is going to keep turning and I understand that. Vince [=McMahon=] is going to make money despite himself. He's a millionaire who should be a billionaire. You know why he's not a billionaire? Because he surrounds himself with glad-handed, non-sensical, douchebag yes men, like Wrestling/JohnLaurinaitis, who's going to tell him everything he wants to hear, and I'd like to think that maybe this company will better after Vince [=McMahon=] is dead. But the fact is, it's going to be taken over by his [[Wrestling/StephanieMcMahon idiotic daughter]] and his [[Wrestling/TripleH doofus son-in-law]] and the rest of his stupid family. Let me tell you a personal story about Vince [=McMahon=], all right? Here we're doing this whole bullying campaign--"'' (Mic cut off)

'''CM Punk:''' ''You know, you keep saying that, and your words just scream "Superiority!" but I watch you and the way you walk out here, the inflection in your voice, and certainly your body language, it screams "Inferiority!". Who you're trying to prove? Are you trying to prove to me that you're the best? Are you trying to prove to these people that you're the best? Or are you trying to prove to yourself that you're the best?\\
I say "I'm the best in the world", and yeah, that's a little cocky, but confidence is nothing that I've ever lacked, and it's nothing I thought you lacked, but now that confidence, Chris, it seems to be replaced with jealousy. So you look at me, and you see a guy that emerged from the same shadows you did, he came from the same places you did, he overcame the same obstacles you did, but now he surpassed everything that you did, didn't he? Because, sure! You beat legends. You beat the [[Wrestling/StoneColdSteveAustin Stone Cold]] and you beat [[Wrestling/DwayneJohnson Rock]] in the same night ten years ago, and that made you the WWE Champion. But you were never really the Man, like how I'm the Man, were you?\\
And that just bothers you a little bit, doesn't it? You have a Napoleon complex because of it, so you come back and you try to point fingers and place the blame. The blame's only on you. See, you say that you're "the best in the world at what you do", and I say that "I'm the best wrestler in the world". This is nothing I chose, I was born this way. This is who I am. This is what I do. While you choose to leave and write books, and have a radio show, and be on game shows, and you choose [[Music/{{Fozzy}} to be a rock star]], and all the while I'm here, on top, swimming with sharks, while you're dancing with stars!''\\
'''Chris Jericho:''' ''When I was dancing with stars, Punk, and killing it on the Tonight Show, and becoming a bigger star than you ever were, all I could think of was one thing, and that was [[PunctuatedForEmphasis you. Ripping. Me. Off.]] Every single night. [[PunctuatedForEmphasis You. Ripping. Me. Off. Punk.]] And let me be completely clear and honest with you. All of those January 2nd. vignettes, and the "Best in the world" verbage, and this light-up, flashy, fancy jacket, it's all window-dressing, because I came back to the WWE for one reason, and one reason only. And that was to embarass you on the biggest stage in the world. To take back what is mine, to beat you for that world title at Wrestlemania, and shove down your throat THAT I AM THE BEST IN THE WORLD AT WHAT I DO. I PROVE IT! I CLAIM IT! I AM! IT! EVERY! SINGLE! NIGHT!''\\
'''CM Punk:''' ''That's all you have to say? When you came back, you didn't have to jump me to get my attention. All you had to do is grab me and say "Hey, Punk! Me and you! Best in the world vs. Best in the world at Wrestlemania!"\\
See, this is the time of the year everyone points at that sign. But I'm gonna point at my championship title. Because to me, I don't need Chris Brown, and you don't need Mickey Rourke, and we don't need all the pyro in the world, or inflatable letters to tell everybody how awesome we are, and I don't need a fancy entrance, AND SCREW YOUR STUPID, LITE-BRITE JACKET! The only thing we need is me and you in a ring, and in April 1st, we're gonna find out exactly who the "Best in the World" is because, to me, those are the only ingredientes we need, in the recipe to have what quite possibly could be the greatest. Wrestling. Match. In Wrestlemania history. But, see, I have something you covet, and I say "Come and get it!", and at the end of the night, when you are looking over your shoulder at the ramp and you see this:''\\

'''CM Punk:''' ''You know, [[YouKeepUsingThatWord you keep saying that]], and your words just scream "Superiority!" but I watch you and the way you walk out here, the inflection in your voice, and certainly your body language, it screams "Inferiority!". Who you're trying to prove? Are you trying to prove to me that you're the best? Are you trying to prove to these people that you're the best? Or are you trying to prove to yourself that you're the best?\\

''"I see you. [[WorthyOpponent You're good]]. I've seen you jump out of airplanes. I've seen you wrapped up in a body bag and chucked over the top rope. I've seen you kicked down a flight of stairs, and you always come back. Just like each and every person here in Chicago, you're tough. But I'm here to help, and you're the first on the list. I'm gonna help you because you're a daredevil and you like danger. Well, Darby Allin, [[LetsGetDangerous there is nothing you can do that is more dangerous than wrestling CM Punk]]. [[UpToEleven Except wrestling CM Punk in]] UsefulNotes/{{Chicago}}. I will see you, and I'll see Sting, and I'll see all of you September 5th. At All Out, live on pay per view. I'm back.\\

->''"You guys really know how to make a kid feel like Wrestling/BrittBaker in Pittsburgh. I'm winging this. We're winging this. "We." That's a very important distinction. We'll get back to it. But I didn't plan on what I was going to say because I didn't know what to say, because I didn't know how I was going to feel, but I knew that I needed to feel it. I feel you, Chicago. And I hear you, Chicago."''\\

''"August 20th, 2021. [[HesBack I'm back]]. And I'm back for you. I'm not gonna lie, I'm back for me too, and I'm back because there's a hell of a lot of young talent that I wish I was surrounded by 10 years ago. So insane that I sit back and I say, well, hell, they're here now, so why aren't you? Here I am. I'm back, because I want to work with that young talent that had the same passion that I had stamped out. I'm back because there's a couple of scores to settle in that locker room. I'm back for the young guys."''\\

''"Darby Allin. I see you. [[WorthyOpponent You're good]]. I've seen you jump out of airplanes. I've seen you wrapped up in a body bag and chucked over the top rope. I've seen you kicked down a flight of stairs, and you always come back. Just like each and every person here in Chicago, you're tough. But I'm here to help, and you're the first on the list. I'm gonna help you because you're a daredevil and you like danger. Well, Darby Allin, [[LetsGetDangerous there is nothing you can do that is more dangerous than wrestling CM Punk]]. [[UpToEleven Except wrestling CM Punk in]] UsefulNotes/{{Chicago}}. I will see you, and I'll see Sting, and I'll see all of you September 5th. At All Out, live on pay per view. I'm back.\\

I don't hate you, John. I don’t even dislike you. I ''do'' like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this ''idea'' that you're the best. Because you're not. I'm the best. I'm the best in the world. There's one thing you're better at than I am and that’s kissing Wrestling/VinceMcMahon's ass. You're as good as kissing Vince [=McMahon's=] ass as Wrestling/HulkHogan was. I don't know if you're as good as [[Wrestling/DwayneJohnson Dwayne]] though. He's a pretty good ass kisser. Always was and still is. Whoops! I'm BreakingTheFourthWall!''\\

-> ''"Wrestling/JohnCena, while you lay there, hopefully as uncomfortable as you possibly can be, I want you to listen to me. I want you to digest this because before I leave in 3 weeks with your WWE Championship, I have a lot of things I want to get off my chest.\\
I don't hate you, John. I don’t even dislike you. I do like you. I like you a hell of a lot more than I like most people in the back. I hate this idea that you're the best. Because you're not. I'm the best. I'm the best in the world. There's one thing you're better at than I am and that’s kissing Wrestling/VinceMcMahon's ass. You're as good as kissing Vince [=McMahon's=] ass as Wrestling/HulkHogan was. I don't know if you're as good as [[Wrestling/DwayneJohnson Dwayne]] though. He's a pretty good ass kisser. Always was and still is. Whoops! I'm {{breaking the fourth wall}}!''\\

Oh hey, let me get something straight. Those of you who are cheering me right now, [[CheapHeat you are just as big a part of me leaving as anything else]]. Because you're the ones who are sipping on those collector cups right now. You're the ones that buy those programs that my face isn't on the cover of. And then at five in the morning at the airport, you try to shove it in my face and get an autograph and try to sell it on Website/{{Ebay}} because you're too lazy to go get a real job.\\

The reason I'm leaving is you people. Because after I'm gone, you're still going to pour money into this company. I'm just a spoke on the wheel. The wheel is going to keep turning and I understand that. Vince [=McMahon=] is going to make money despite himself. He's a millionaire who should be a billionaire. You know why he's not a billionaire? Because he surrounds himself with glad-handed, non-sensical, douchebag yes men, like Wrestling/JohnLaurinaitis, who's going to tell him everything he wants to hear, and I'd like to think that maybe this company will better after Vince [=McMahon=] is dead. But the fact is, it's going to be taken over by his [[Wrestling/StephanieMcMahon idiotic daughter]] and his [[Wrestling/TripleH doofus son-in-law]] and the rest of his stupid family. Let me tell you a personal story about Vince [=McMahon=], all right? We do this whole bully campaign-"'' (Mic cut off)

->''"You guys really know how to make a kid feel like Wrestling/BrittBaker in Pittsburgh. I'm winging this. We're winging this. "We." That's a very important distinction. We'll get back to it. But I didn't plan on what I was going to say because I didn't know what to say, because I didn't know how I was going to feel, but I knew that I needed to feel it. I feel you, Chicago. And I hear you, Chicago."''

->*'''the crowd chants CM Punk'''*

->''"That's what I've heard for seven years. I heard you. I heard you. And we got a lot to cover. There's good news and bad news. The bad news is we're not going to get to it all right here right now. But the good news is, is I've got the time. Wednesday, Friday, four Sunday or Saturdays a year. I got the time, and I ain't going anywhere."''

->''"Wait. One second. Possibly for me, the most important thing I'm going to say right now, and this is for everybody at home, this is for everybody who bought a ticket, this is for everybody in the back. If, at all through my journey, any of my personal choices or decisions related to my life made you feel disappointed or let down, let me just say… Let me just say… I understand, if you all try to understand that [[BrokenBird I was never gonna get healthy physically, mentally, spiritually, or emotionally]], staying in [[Wrestling/{{WWE}} the same place]] that got me sick in the first place."''

->''"[[CallBack Can I tell you guys a story?]] It's hot in here. Hang on one second."''

->*'''Punk removes his sweatshirt, revealing [[CallBack a white CM Punk shirt underneath, and sits pipe-bomb style in the ring]]'''*

->''"Can I tell you a story? You see, I felt before like I had to leave. I didn't want to, but I knew I couldn't stay, and that was when [[BaitAndSwitch I used to work for a place]] called Wrestling/RingOfHonor. August 13th, 2005 was my last match in Ring of Honor, and I famously came out with tears in my eyes, and walking out here today, I now know why I was crying. And it was a lot of reasons. But what it boiled down to was, I had made a place where people could come work, get paid, learn their craft, and love professional wrestling. And I cried because I knew I was leaving a place that I love, and it was a home, and I knew where I was going, wasn't going to be easy for a guy like me. Because I'm one of you. So I look at it like this: [[StealthInsult August 13th, 2005, I left professional wrestling.]]"''

->*'''Punk stands back up'''*

->''"August 20th, 2021. [[HesBack I'm back]]. And I'm back for you. I'm not gonna lie, I'm back for me too, and I'm back because there's a hell of a lot of young talent that I wish I was surrounded by 10 years ago. So insane that I sit back and I say, well, hell, they're here now, so why aren't you? Here I am. I'm back, because I want to work with that young talent that had the same passion that I had stamped out. I'm back because there's a couple of scores to settle in that locker room. I'm back for the young guys."''

->*'''Wrestling/DarbyAllin and Wrestling/{{Sting}} are watching from the rafters'''*

->''"Darby Allin. I see you. [[WorthyOpponent You're good]]. I've seen you jump out of airplanes. I've seen you wrapped up in a body bag and chucked over the top rope. I've seen you kicked down a flight of stairs, and you always come back. Just like each and every person here in Chicago, you're tough. But I'm here to help, and you're the first on the list. I'm gonna help you because you're a daredevil and you like danger. Well, Darby Allin, [[LetsGetDangerous there is nothing you can do that is more dangerous than wrestling CM Punk]]. [[UpToEleven Except wrestling CM Punk in]] UsefulNotes/{{Chicago}}. I will see you, and I'll see Sting, and I'll see all of you September 5th. At All Out, live on pay per view. I'm back."''

->''"Oh, one more thing. Seven years is an awful long time to wait for somebody. I appreciate everybody here who has waited. So on your way out of the United Center tonight, [[CallBack grab yourself a free ice cream bar on me]]."''

->*the crowd chants CM Punk*

->*Punk removes his sweatshirt, revealing [[CallBack a white CM Punk shirt underneath, and sits pipe-bomb style in the ring]]*

->''"Can I tell you a story? You see, I felt before like I had to leave. I didn't want to, but I knew I couldn't stay, and that was when [[BaitAndSwitch I used to work for a place]] called Wrestling/RingOfHonor. August 13th, 2005 was my last match in Ring of Honor, and I famously came out with tears in my eyes, and walking out here today, I now know why I was crying. And it was a lot of reasons. But what it boiled down to was, I had made a place where people could come work, get paid, learn their craft, and love professional wrestling. And I cried because I knew I was leaving a place that I love, and it was a home, and I knew where I was going, wasn't going to be easy for a guy like me. Because I'm one of you. So I look at it like this: August 13th, 2005, I left professional wrestling."''

->*Punk stands back up*

->*Wrestling/DarbyAllin and Wrestling/{{Sting}} are watching from the rafters*

->''"[[{{Callback}} Can I tell you guys a story?]] It's hot in here. Hang on one second."''

->*Punk removes his sweatshirt, revealing [[{{Callback}} a white CM Punk shirt underneath, and sits pipe-bomb style in the ring]]*

->''"Oh, one more thing. Seven years is an awful long time to wait for somebody. I appreciate everybody here who has waited. So on your way out of the United Center tonight, [[{{Callback}} grab yourself a free ice cream bar on me]]."''
-->-- '''AEW Rampage Episode 2: The First Dance'''

-->-- ''CM Punk: Best in the World'' Documentary, 2012

->''"Oh, one more thing. Seven years is an awful long time to wait for somebody. I appreciate everybody here who has waited. So on your way out of the United Center tonight, [[{{Callback}} grab yourself a free ice cream bar on me]]."''

-->-- ''CM Punk: Best in the World'' Documentary, 2012

I've grabbed so many of Vincent K. [=McMahon's=] brass rings that it's finally dawned on me that they're just that, they’re completely imaginary. The only thing that's real is me and the fact that day in and day out, for almost six years, I have proved to everybody in the world that I am the best on this microphone, in that ring, even on commentary! Nobody can touch me! And yet no matter how many times I prove it, I'm not on your lovely little collector cups. I'm not on the cover of the program. I'm barely promoted. I don't get to be in movies. I'm certainly not on any crappy show on the Creator/USANetwork. I'm not on the poster of [=WrestleMania=]. I'm not on the signature that's produced at the start of the show. I'm not on [[Series/{{Conan}} Conan O'Brien]]. I'm not on [[Series/LateNight Jimmy Fallon]]. But the fact of the matter is, I should be. This isn't sour grapes. But the fact that Dwayne is in the main event at [=WrestleMania=] next year and I'm not makes me sick!\\