History Main / YourVampiresSuck

[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/CountVsCullen.jpg]]
[[caption-width-right:350:[-[[Series/SesameStreet One! Two! Three!]] [[Creator/DaveChappelle Three left hooks]] to [[Literature/{{Twilight}} your]] little [[BishieSparkle sparkly]] face! [[http://poopbear.deviantart.com/art/Down-for-the-Count-153668816 Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!]]-] ]]

[[folder:Web Comics]]

*** The Ravenloft Monstrous Compendium also had rules for vampires of all the various [[FiveRaces playable races]] with powers and weaknesses appropriate to their origins. Elven vampires, for example, can only come out during the daytime and their presence [[WalkingWasteland kills plants]]; halfling vampires must be slain by driving a stake made from a log that burned in a home's fireplace through their heart, etc. It's implied that many vampire hunters get themselves killed because they dismiss the possibility of vampires that break "the rules" as much as these variants do.

** The book has a pretty big one: Carlisle keeps a giant wooden cross in his house.

** He also has no problem with holy symbols, saying that he was a nice guy when he was alive, so why should he care now that he's undead?

* In a weird case of '''[[InvertedTrope Our]]''' [[InvertedTrope Vampires Suck]], ''VideoGame/DungeonsofDredmor'' claims that the [[Literature/{{Twilight}} 'Sparkly']] skill that [[MonsterAdventurers vampire heroes]] can obtain drains life from your enemies because of how stupid it is.

* ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'', [[TropeOverdosed naturally]], has some of this after Durkon gets turned into a vampire and has to feed on the rest of the team to stay alive. Inthe in-universe dialpgue, it's {{inverted}} ("Our vampires suck.") From [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0958.html strip #958]]:

* The Pillar Men from ''Manga/JojosBizarreAdventureBattleTendency'' actually created vampires to serve as their food source and as {{Mooks}}, so naturally they look down upon them, despite being pseudo-vampires themselves. Or rather, vampires are pseudo-Pillar Men.

[[caption-width-right:350:[-[[Series/SesameStreet One! Two! Three]]! [[Creator/DaveChappelle Three left hooks]] to [[Literature/{{Twilight}} your]] little [[BishieSparkle sparkly]] face! [[http://poopbear.deviantart.com/art/Down-for-the-Count-153668816 Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!]]-] ]]

* ''Literature/{{Carmilla}}'': In the last chapter, Laura recounts some of the vampire lore she learned through Baron Vordenburg and mentions that the "deadly pallor" sometimes attributed to vampires is "a mere melodramatic fiction". This is likely a swipe at ''Literature/VarneyTheVampire'' (1845-47), in which the titular vampire is often described as unnaturally pale.

* ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'', [[TropeOverdosed naturally]], has some of this after Durkon gets turned into a vampire and has to feed on the rest of the team to stay alive. From [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0958.html strip #958]]:

* In ''Literature/NightWatch'',[[note]] not the ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'' novel, the Russian ones set in Moscow[[/note]] many of the traditional vampire weaknesses are said to be made up by the vampires themselves to give humans a false sense of security.

-->'''[[CuteWitch Marisa]]:''' You're one of ''[[{{Vampire}} those]]'', right? Can't stand sunlight or smelly vegetables, or silver things. The masters of the night which for some reason have tons of weaknesses...

* ''Literature/{{Carmilla}}'': In the last chapter, Laura recounts some of the vampire lore she learned through Baron Vordenburg and mentions that the "deadly pallor" sometimes attributed to vampires is "only a melodramatic fiction". This is likely a swipe at ''Literature/VarneyTheVampire'' (1845-47), in which the titular vampire is often described as unnaturally pale.

* ''Literature/{{Carmilla}}'': In the last chapter, Laura recounts some of the vampire lore she learned through Baron Vordenburg and mentions that the "deadly pallor" sometimes attributed to vampires is "only a melodramatic fiction". This is likely a swipe at ''Literature/VarneyTheVampire''(1845-47), in which the titular vampire is often described as unnaturally pale.

* ''Literature/{{Carmilla}}'': In the last chapter, Laura recounts some of the vampire lore she learned through Baron Vordenburg and mentions that the "deadly pallor" sometimes attributed to vampires is "only a melodramatic fiction". This is likely a swipe at Varney the Vampire (1845-47), in which the titular vampire is often described as very pale.

* The movie ''Vampire Wars'' had vampires that survive sunlight, have sparkly hair, and [[spoiler: are really aliens.]]

* ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}'' has a vampire mockingly describe how "[Joss] Whedon got it wrong" after taking a wooden staff through the heart. Amusingly enough, several years later ''Runaways'' was being written by... Creator/JossWhedon. Considering the guy who wrote that, Brian K. Vaughan, ended up writing an arc of Whedon's ''[[ComicBook/BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffy: Season 8]]'' comic around the same time Whedon started on ''Runaways'', it pretty much ''had'' to be [[AffectionateParody good-natured ribbing]].
** It should be noted some vampire breeds have the traditional weaknesses but [[FantasyKitchenSink in Marvel]], there are many different breeds of vampire. Like ComicBook/{{Morbius}} [[NotUsingTheZWord obviously not being a vampire]] because [[ArbitrarySkepticism that's just silly]]. Blade must pack a lot of different weapons.
*** His name should tell you what he uses most. Beheading kills most things.
*** Blade's name comes from the fact that he [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blade_(character)#Equipment used knives with wooden blades to stake vampires.]]

* ''SelfDemonstrating/{{Deadpool}}'''s wife, Shiklah, is a succubus that has an ongoing war against Dracula style vampires. One day she picks up ''Twilight'' and is amazed that Dracula allows humans to mock his people so severely. She also can't stop reading it.

* Professor Literature/{{Dracula}} [[https://www.deviantart.com/silverwingfox/art/Vampires-101-132176234 explains]] the differences between [[Literature/{{Twilight}} bad vampires]] and awesome vampires [[Literature/TheSagaOfDarrenShan to]] [[Manga/{{Hellsing}} some]] [[Series/{{Angel}} familiar]] [[Literature/InterviewWithTheVampire faces]].
** Bonus points for having Headmaster Film/{{Nosferatu}} ''stab the sparkles coming off Edward's body''

* ''Literature/KellyTheRomanWarrior'' and its sequel - both crossovers of multiple franchises - feature a running feud between Dracula ([[FriendlyNeighborhoodVampires a good guy]]) and a villainous [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Edward Cullen]]. [[RougeAnglesOfSatin Draculaka]] frequently complains that Edward doesn't do proper vampires things like turn into a bat, while Edward criticizes [[RunningGag Dracukla]] for not being sparkly.

* A fantastic example of this occurs in ''Film/InterviewWithTheVampire'' when Malloy starts asking Louis if he is affected by the usual vampire weaknesses, specifically mentioning crucifixes. Louis responds by saying he actually rather enjoys looking at crucifixes. He even describes such superstitions as the "ravings of a demented Irishman," a TakeThat at Creator/BramStoker. What makes this ironic is that one of the only bits of vampire lore that Anne Rice's vampires abide by is death by sunlight, which is not only ''not'' part of real vampire lore, but entered into popular culture as a plot contrivance in ''Nosferatu'' -- itself an adaption of Stoker's ''Dracula''.

* ''Literature/TheVampireChronicles'':
** ''Interview with the Vampire'':
*** Both the book and movie versions state that a vampire being killed by a hawthorne stake through the heart is a ridiculous fairy tale. And Louis ''enjoys'' looking at Holy Crosses.
*** Also, for the first half of the movie there is a scene with a mirror about every five minutes, just to make it clear to everyone that yes, they are visible.
** In ''The Vampire Lestat'':
*** Lestat approaches the goth-band who practices above his crypt and tells them he is the Vampire Lestat, and is going to be their new lead singer. Lestat is surprised when the goths are pleased he took Lestat as his stage name (having read ''Literature/InterviewWithTheVampire'') and not Dracula -- "everyone calls themselves Dracula."
*** There's a scene where Lestat reads a load of vampire books and specifically pokes fun at a scene in ''Dracula'' where the Count is shown climbing down the wall of his castle like a spider. Lestat wonders why Dracula went to all that effort when he could just have turned into a bat and ''flown'' down. There's actually what appears to be an in-universe reason for that, of all things. The novel's Dracula seems to be only able to transform into one particular creature each night (bat, wolf, mist, etc) and is mostly seen turning into a wolf at that point.
* ''Literature/NightfallSeries'': Myra looks at the vampire novels in the Resistance’s small library and thinks about how Old World fiction used to romanticize vampires. She wonders if any of the authors would exchange places with her and live the reality.

* In Creator/JimButcher's ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles '':

* ''Literature/TheSagaOfTheNobleDead'' series has an unusual way of doing this. It was set in a sword-and-sorcery world, but was still able to do this by explaining that certain folklore about vampires had been passed down until even the vampires believed them. Until they found out it was a myth, the vampires carried around coffins filled with native soil, and let victims they wanted to turn drink their blood (it was actually the act of draining them very quickly that turned them).

* ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'':
** ''Literature/CarpeJugulum''. Starts out as a send-up to the "traditional" vampire model, then turned around when [[spoiler:the New Age-ish vampires start to lose their cool and resistance to traditional vampire wards, and the villagers reveal that they ''prefer'' the LargeHam old vampires. The final nail in the coffin of "reinventing vampires to be more interesting" is when traditionalist and true patriarch of the de Magpyr clan, Creator/{{Bela|Lugosi}}, drags them back home for a lesson in ''why'' things are done the way they are]]. Also used in-universe, in a way, as the leader of the "new" vampires reveals that he ''wrote the texts'' that a priest had been relying upon to tell how to kill vampires. In this case, this trope manifests as his having slipped a load of hooey into the monster-hunting literature, the better to spread disinformation.
** Then there's Otto Chriek, the vampire photographer. He's unfailingly polite, [[VampireVords speaks with a pronounced Uberwaldean (read: Transylvanian) accent]], wears opera clothes and a bow tie, and has the widow's peak hairstyle. It's hinted in a couple of books that Otto deliberately plays up his image as a "music-hall vampire" because it makes people laugh, and he'd rather have them laughing at him than trying to kill him (not that he couldn't handle himself; Otto can be pretty badass when he needs to be).
* In ''Literature/TheSagaOfDarrenShan'', Larten Crepsley mocks many assumptions about vampires ("Bite people? Only stupid vampires use their teeth!"), sometimes to the extent of bursting into laughter when one is suggested. When he's threatened with a bottle of holy water, he drinks it. One character relates how he attempted to stake a sleeping vampire, but since the series' vampires are MadeOfIron, the vampire woke up and nearly killed him before bleeding to death. It is pointed out, however, that many beliefs about vampires are based on distorted details of their culture (vampires use stake-filled pits in executions, for instance, and believe that dying in running water traps a person's soul).
* A running gag in ''Literature/BloodsuckingFiends: A Love Story'' is Tommy attempting to use Ann Rice's ''The Vampire Lestat'' as a "vampire handbook" for Jody, his vampire girlfriend. It isn't long before she gets angry from just hearing Lestat's name.
* Noted in Garry Kilworth's ''Literature/WelkinWeasels: Vampire Voles''. Count Flistagga mentions that most vampires dislike crossing running water, but he has "long since overcome that weakness". It should be noted, however, that the other vampires are defeated with ridiculous ease.
* In Creator/MercedesLackey's ''Literature/ChildrenOfTheNight'', vampire Andre dismisses several traditional limitations as "silliness," in particular the inability to cross running water, which he ascribes to a misunderstanding of their tendency to set territorial boundaries. He tells Diana that it could just as easily be said that they do not cross mountain ranges or major highways, since they define their territories by major landmarks.

* Creator/StephenieMeyer's ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''. When Bella asks vampire Edward if he does things like turning into a bat, sleep in coffins and specially when asked if he burned in the sunlight, he laughs and says it's a myth. He then shows her [[BishieSparkle what really happens when he goes into the sunlight]].
** Edward [[LampshadeHanging lampshades]] the Cullens having a giant wooden cross in their house. Plus, the fact that Carlisle was a preacher.
** As should be evidenced by now, ''Twilight'' itself is a major target of this trope. It is in fact even likely that it's furthest down on the pecking order.
* In ''Literature/TheLastVampire'' series by Creator/ChristopherPike, the protagonist is a vampire named Sita who possesses few of the traditional weaknesses. She sometimes has the "what about crosses, garlic, running water, coffin?" conversation with humans she reveals herself to. She can even stand the sunlight, though she explains she couldn't really do this until she'd aged a few THOUSAND years. Vampires in this series were first created when a demon (a yakshini) was summoned and possessed the corpse of a baby who was still inside its dead mother's womb.
* Scott Westerfeld's UrbanFantasy ''Literature/{{Peeps}}'' starts off with a discussion of how vampires can't [[VoluntaryShapeshifting turn into bats]], still show up in mirrors, etc. Vampirism is a parasitic infection that grants SuperStrength and senses, sometimes super libido, and makes you hate whatever you used to love (including crosses for devout Christians). And makes you hate giant worms, even if you didn't used to love them.
* In ''Literature/VampireHigh'', Justin explains to Cody that while vampires ''can'' shapeshift, they rarely do bats because their mass stays the same and thus they'd just become a bat too huge to fly. Cody later jokes about using crosses and garlic and Justin informs him that his mother wears a cross and cooks with garlic, indicating that those don't work on vampires. Also, they usually get their blood [[VegetarianVampire at the blood bank]]. Later when Justin is dying from a lack of blood, Cody offers up his own blood. How do they get Cody's blood? By using a syringe to take blood from Cody and give it to Justin.
* Shows up regularly in ''[=McLendon's=] Syndrome'' and its sequel ''The VMR Theory'', despite it being a comedic sci-fi setting where vampirism is a well-documented and somewhat believable disease causing promiscuous cell replacement, hypersensitivity to UV, severe and broad food allergies, and erratic hormones. The catch is that people in these books are generally uninformed, stupid, superstitious, or outright insane, and therefore believe fervently (or feverishly) in vampire myth. And vampires who are not main characters are treated just like people.
* In Creator/GeorgeRRMartin's novel ''Literature/FevreDream'', vampires are fast, strong, and hard to kill but have no supernatural abilities (beyond hypnotic eyes), can't infect anyone else (though they let their servants believe they'll be turned for loyal service) and don't know much about their origins. They're still scary as hell and do not deal well with sunlight. The novel is about a vampire trying to save his subspecies from extinction. In a memorable scene, he walks about his steamboat in full daylight to allay his human crew's suspicions -- coming close to killing himself -- for the sake of his quite heroic cause.
* Andrzej Sapkowski's ''Literature/TheWitcher'' series makes fun of vampires to the great extent. Most of common folk in his dark fantasy world believes in most of vampiric tropes, while in reality (the book's reality) vampires are immune to fire and drink blood only for recreational purposes (blood affects them as alcohol affects mankind). The main vampire character used to drink blood because otherwise he felt too shy to approach vampire girls.

* An early topic of discussion for Escott and Jack in P.N. Elrod's ''Literature/TheVampireFiles'' is about how traits that Jack lacks might've become falsely associated with vampires. Jack suggests that garlic might've been credited with repelling vampires because old-time European peasants considered it a cure for ''everything''. Then he points out the inherent silliness of using something that smells bad to ward off creatures that don't need to breathe.
-->'''Jack''': Vampires? Try garlic. Can't hurt. Can't help, either.
** He also has no problem with holy symbols, saying that he was a nice guy when he was alive, so why should he care now that he's undead?
* Creator/FredSaberhagen takes a mostly science-fictional approach to vampires in his [[Literature/TheDraculaTape Dracula]] series. Many vampiric abilities have naturalistic origins, while some are not fully understood even by Dracula himself, though he believes science ''will'' eventually explain them. Several aspects of vampire lore are completely debunked, though. Vampires find garlic (and all other strong-smelling substances) ''unpleasant'', but no more than that. And religious symbols like the crucifix are completely irrelevant. Dracula in fact (having converted from the Orthodox faith in his breathing years) still considers himself a Roman Catholic -- so he'll avoid religious symbols not because they harm him but because he feels it'd be verging on blasphemy to risk damaging ''them''.
* DerekGunn's ''Literature/VampireApocalypseTheSeries'' novels are all about restoring vampires to being horrible creatures of the night. According to WordOfGod, it was a major motivation for writing the series. Vampires are asexual walking corpses who eat babies and delight in carnage. Oh and they've taken over the world too.
* In Beth Fantaskey's novel ''Literature/JessicasGuideToDatingOnTheDarkSide'', Lucius scoffs: "Please. A bat? What self-respecting vampire would want to turn into a flying rodent? (...) What would be so wonderful about dissolving in sunlight? Or not being able to look in a mirror and judge whether you've dressed yourself properly?"
* One character in the ''Literature/SkulduggeryPleasant'' novels is a [[ReallySevenHundredYearsOld (perpetually)]] 19-year old vampire called Caelan, more or less an CaptainErsatz of Edward from ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' (which is even [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] by Valkyrie), [[StalkerWithACrush right down to stalking the female lead]]. He's almost universally hated by vampires [[ApeShallNeverKillApe for killing one of his own]], and humans for pretending to be something he's not, every time he meets another vampire they beat him within an inch of his life, and the protagonists only tolerate him when Valkyrie makes them.
%%* In Creator/MegCabot's ''Insatiable'', this happens a lot. The main character Meena works as writer for a paranormal soap opera about vampires, the titular ''Insatiable'', and eventually meets real vampires.
* In the ''Literature/FalconQuinn'' series, Ms. Redflint, the dean of students, is ''not'' fond of vampires. She hates how they all seem to be walking superiority/inferiority complexes, what with the "Literature/{{twilight}} brooding" and general angst, and dearly hopes none of Falcon's group are vampires. The vampires quite live up to her expectations, as the vampires use their supposed "awesomeness" to assume the role of the AlphaBitch in the monster hierarchy.
* Olga Gromyko's Volha Rednaya series is all about this. For example, not only is garlic completely harmless to the vampires, one of the vampire states actually managed to turn it into an export product (despite not growing it for that purpose) due to all the misinformed "vampire hunters" they catch at the border armed with it. Sunlight doesn't harm them either, and they aren't undead, though they do have a ritual which allows to return one's soul from the underworld and back into the body(which has to be alive). They also only drink blood when they have suffered major blood loss, and it doesn't even have to be human blood.
* ''Literature/TheTumbleweedDossier'' takes several shots at ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''.
* Many ParanormalRomance books written after ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' take time to mock it. With this excellent example from the ''Literature/NightHuntress'' series:
--> '''Bones''': Ask me if I sparkle and I'll kill you where you stand.
* The protagonist of ''Literature/TheSanguineChronicles'' has a special hate for ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''. In part this is rooted in a loathing for bad literature, but also rooted in resentment of Creator/StephenieMeyer for trivializing and romanticizing his own condition. He feels about vampire fans the same way an AIDS patient might feel about [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bugchasing Bug chasers.]]

* Played with in F. Paul Wilson's ''[[Literature/TheAdversaryCycle The Keep]]'', in which the monster isn't actually a vampire and has none of their traditional qualities, but ''plays up'' the role of one to better terrorize the Nazis who've occupied his castle. He also fakes being susceptible to the cross, but only as a way of maliciously trolling the Jewish prisoner who's helping him. In truth, the cross only became associated with warding off vampires in this Verse because it resembles a specific ''sword hilt'', which really '''does''' frighten and constrain him.
* In ''Literature/FortunatelyTheMilk'', the protagonist encounters a group of "wumpires", who make a point of specifying that they do not sparkle.
* Taken UpToEleven In the ''Literature/BasLagCycle'', where '''all''' vampires suck; they’re the pathetic losers of [[TheNecrocracy High Cromlech’s undead society]], seen as pitiable blood-addicts at best. They don’t have any particular special powers, all of the weaknesses apply, and it’s explicitly said that the stereotypical aristocrat vampire is a lie spread by vampires who immigrate to other lands to make themselves look better and make it easier to feed. In their homeland, they’re [[HarmlessVillain Harmless Villains]] who usually starve in the streets because all the other undead in Cromlech protect the human citizens from them.

* When Bon Temps' resident vampire Bill Compton is invited to speak before a historical society in ''Series/TrueBlood'', the meeting is held ''at a church.'' Someone hurriedly throws an American flag over a big cross, but Bill prefaces his speech by collecting the flag and rehanging it, saying that he is "one of God's creatures" and has no trouble standing in front of a cross or on holy ground.

** In a nice twist on the usual expectations, sunlight kills older vampires ''faster''. [[spoiler:Bill survives, albeit badly burned, for a few minutes in the sun whereas the ancient vampire Godric is reduced to dust in a matter of seconds.]]
*** Then again, the even older Russell Edgington survives for about 10 minutes in the sun with only minor burns. [[spoiler:Sookie's blood may have something to do with it.]]

* Literature/TheBible spares no opportunity to take potshots at the deities of the ancient Middle East, with ''The Book Of Kings'' featuring Elijah suggesting that Baal does not answer Caananite prayers because he is defecating or on holiday.

* ''Webcomic/PvP'': [[http://www.pvponline.com/2008/10/23/monster-fighters-part-2/ Monster Fighters, Part 2.]]

{{Dracula}} is probably the most common vampire to be on the receiving end, since he is the source of almost every modern vampire trope, and hence embodies most of them in [[AdaptationOverdosed some]] [[AudienceColoringAdaptation version]] [[AdaptationDisplacement or]] [[LostInImitation another]]. On the modern end, ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' is another very common easy potshot for vampire parodies, partly for the opposite reason that it averts so many traditional tropes. The other two frequent targets are ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer'' and ''Literature/TheVampireChronicles'', mainly because those are the only two additional works for which [[SmallReferencePools the writers can be sure the audience will know what's being mocked.]]

* ''Literature/KellyTheRomanWarrior'' and its sequel - both crossovers of multiple franchises - feature a running feud between Dracula ([[FriendlyNeighborhoodVampires a good guy]]) and a villainous [[Literature/{{Twilight}} Edward Cullen. [[RougeAnglesOfSatin Draculaka]] frequently complains that Edward doesn't do proper vampires things like turn into a bat, while Edward criticizes [[RunningGag Dracukla]] for not being sparkly.

* The Pillar Men from ''Manga/JoJosBizarreAdventureBattleTendency'' actually created vampires to serve as their food source and as {{Mook}}s, so naturally they look down upon them, despite being pseudo-vampires themselves. Or rather, vampires are pseudo-Pillar Men.

* ''ComicBook/{{Runaways}}'' has a vampire mockingly describe how "[Joss] Whedon got it wrong" after taking a wooden staff through the heart. Amusingly enough, several years later ''Runaways'' was being written by... Creator/JossWhedon.
** Considering the guy who wrote that, Brian K. Vaughan, ended up writing an arc of Whedon's ''[[ComicBook/BuffyTheVampireSlayer Buffy: Season 8]]'' comic around the same time Whedon started on ''Runaways'', it pretty much ''had'' to be [[AffectionateParody good-natured ribbing]].

*** Blade's name comes from the fact that he [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blade_(comics)#Equipment used knives with wooden blades to stake vampires.]]

* In a scene of ''[[Film/FrightNight2011 Fright Night]]'' remake, one of the characters make fun of ''Twilight''.

** ''Discworld/CarpeJugulum''. Starts out as a send-up to the "traditional" vampire model, then turned around when [[spoiler:the New Age-ish vampires start to lose their cool and resistance to traditional vampire wards, and the villagers reveal that they ''prefer'' the LargeHam old vampires. The final nail in the coffin of "reinventing vampires to be more interesting" is when traditionalist and true patriarch of the de Magpyr clan, [[Creator/BelaLegosi Bela]], drags them back home for a lesson in ''why'' things are done the way they are]]. Also used in-universe, in a way, as the leader of the "new" vampires reveals that he ''wrote the texts'' that a priest had been relying upon to tell how to kill vampires. In this case, this trope manifests as his having slipped a load of hooey into the monster-hunting literature, the better to spread disinformation.

* Creator/StephenieMeyer's ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''. When Bella asks vampire Edward if he does things like turning into a bat, sleep on coffins and specially when asked if he burned in the sunlight, he laughs and says it's a myth. He then shows her [[BishieSparkle what really happens when he goes into the sunlight]].

* DerekGunn's Literature/VampireApocalypseTheSeries novels are all about restoring vampires to being horrible creatures of the night. According to WordOfGod, it was a major motivation for writing the series. Vampires are asexual walking corpses who eat babies and delight in carnage. Oh and they've taken over the world too.

* One character in the ''Literature/SkulduggeryPleasant'' novels is a [[Really700YearsOld (perpetually)]] 19-year old vampire called Caelan, more or less an CaptainErsatz of Edward from ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' (which is even [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] by Valkyrie), [[StalkerWithACrush right down to stalking the female lead]]. He's almost universally hated by vampires [[ApeShallNeverKillApe for killing one of his own]], and humans for pretending to be something he's not, every time he meets another vampire they beat him within an inch of his life, and the protagonists only tolerate him when Valkyrie makes them.

** The opening scene in the season 6 episode "Live Free or Twi Hard", in a direct TakeThat to ''Literature/{{Twilight}}'' has vampires [[ExploitedTrope using the popularity of the Vampire pop culture (specifically ''Twilight'') to seduce victims.]]

** "[[{{Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS2E7LieToMe}} Lie To Me]]", when the Scoobies encounter a group of would-be vampires who have bought into the idea of vampires as romantic and misunderstood. Angel grouses at moderate length about their misapprehensions, noting in particular "Do they really think we dress like that?" ...Only to have one of the groupies push past him wearing his exact outfit.
** [[{{Recap/BuffyTheVampireSlayerS2E3SchoolHard}} In his first appearance]], Spike expresses incredulity that people still buy into "the [[Literature/TheVampireChronicles Anne Rice routine]]" about romantic, tortured vampires. [[HilariousInHindsight Ironically, being exactly that defines his character a few seasons later.]]

* ''Series/{{Sanctuary}}''.

* In a weird case of '''[[InvertedTrope Our]]''' [[InvertedTrope Vampires Suck]], ''VideoGame/DungeonsOfDredmor'' claims that the [[Literature/{{Twilight}} 'Sparkly']] skill that [[MonsterAdventurers vampire heroes]] can obtain drains life from your enemies because of how stupid it is.

-->'''Roman (vampire master)''': ''One more comparison to ''Twilight'' and there'll be nothing left when I finish with you.''

* The Pillar Men from ''Manga/JoJosBizarreAdventureBattleTendency'' actually created vampires to serve as their food source, so naturally they look down upon them, despite being pseudo-vampires themselves. Or rather, vampires are pseudo-Pillar Men.

[[caption-width-right:350:[-[[Series/SesameStreet One]]! [[Creator/DaveChappelle Two! Three! Three left hooks to]] [[Literature/{{Twilight}} your]] [[BishieSparkle sparkly]] face! [[http://poopbear.deviantart.com/art/Down-for-the-Count-153668816 Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!]]-] ]]

* Olga Gromyko's Volha Rednaya series is all about this.For example, not only is garlic completely harmless to the vampires, one of the vampire states actually managed to turn it into an export product (despite not growing it for that purpose) due to all the misinformed "vampire hunters" they catch at the border armed with it.Sunlight doesn't harm them either, and they aren't undead, though they do have a ritual which allows to return one's soul from the underworld and back into the body(which has to be alive).They also only drink blood when they have suffered major blood loss, and it doesn't even have to be human blood.

While it seems strange given the show's heavy use of folklore, the series did this heavily by throwing out virtually all traditional vampire traits, and starting from scratch. The most notable example of this was that the vampires were sensitive to sunlight to the point of getting a sunburn, not to the point of being disabled, let alone killed, which aligns well with Stoker, whose Dracula was merely ''less powerful'' in sunlight. See the oft-maligned [[Film/BramStokersDracula Coppola version]], in which the Count walks around with a parasol and dark glasses. However, many of the changes were actually to put it back in line with traditional folklore compared to other pop culture portrayals.

* While it seems strange given the show's heavy use of folklore, ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'' did this heavily by throwing out virtually all traditional vampire traits, and starting from scratch. The most notable example of this was that the vampires were sensitive to sunlight to the point of getting a sunburn, not to the point of being disabled, let alone killed, which aligns well with Stoker, whose Dracula was merely ''less powerful'' in sunlight. See the oft-maligned [[Film/BramStokersDracula Coppola version]], in which the Count walks around with a parasol and dark glasses.
** Some of the changes are because, not in spite of, the use of folklore. Their vampires have many pre-Dracula characteristics, such as the need for decapitation.
** Dracula vamps needed to be decapitated, too. As well as staked, burned, and getting their mouth stuffed with holy wafers.

** ''Discworld/CarpeJugulum''. Starts out as a send-up to the "traditional" vampire model, then turned around when [[spoiler:the New Age-ish vampires start to lose their cool and resistance to traditional vampire wards, and the villagers reveal that they ''prefer'' the LargeHam old vampires. The final nail in the coffin of "reinventing vampires to be more interesting" is when traditionalist and true patriarch of the de Magpyre clan, [[Creator/BelaLegosi Bela]], drags them back home for a lesson in ''why'' things are done the way they are]]. Also used in-universe, in a way, as the leader of the "new" vampires reveals that he ''wrote the texts'' that a priest had been relying upon to tell how to kill vampires. In this case, this trope manifests as his having slipped a load of hooey into the monster-hunting literature, the better to spread disinformation.

* ''Discworld/CarpeJugulum''. Starts out as a send-up to the "traditional" vampire model, then turned around when [[spoiler:the New Age-ish vampires start to lose their cool and resistance to traditional vampire wards, and the villagers reveal that they ''prefer'' the LargeHam old vampires]].
** Also used in-universe, in a way, as the leader of the "new" vampires reveals that he ''wrote the texts'' that a priest had been relying upon to tell how to kill vampires. In this case, this trope manifests as his having slipped a load of hooey into the monster-hunting literature, the better to spread disinformation.
*** Miss Tick in the Tiffany Aching books used the same ploy with a "Witch Hunting for Dummies" book, which advises doing things like giving a captured witch a nice cup of tea and cookies.
** The de Magpyr family portraits hung on the stairs are a history of the portrayal of vampires in fiction and film: Polidori's Byronic "Vampyre", Murnau's ''Film/{{Nosferatu}}'', Christopher Lee's Film/HammerHorror [[Film/HorrorOfDracula Dracula]], and Gary Oldman's [[Film/BramStokersDracula late-century version.]] The idea is clear: the de Magpyrs reinvent themselves with each generation... with surprising similarity to the evolution of vampires on our world.

** Then there's Otto Chriek, the vampire photographer. He's unfailingly polite, speaks with a pronounced Uberwaldean (read: Transylvanian) accent, wears opera clothes and a bow tie, and has the widow's peak hairstyle. It's hinted in a couple of books that Otto deliberately plays up his image as a "music-hall vampire" because it makes people laugh, and he'd rather have them laughing at him than trying to kill him (not that he couldn't handle himself; Otto can be pretty badass when he needs to be).