History Main / MetaphorGotten

** At the beginning of "Criminal", Slim says "my words are like a dagger with a jagged edge, that'll stab you in the head whether you're a [...]" before derailing into an obscene RhymingList of [[HeteronormativeCrusader slurs for sexual minorities]] that [[Administrivia/RuleOfCautiousEditingJudgment doesn't need to be repeated here]]. The metaphor continues into various homophobic scenarios where the gay men are looking at his crotch and Gianni Versace is murdered because he was too distracted checking out boys - and derails completely when Eminem [[TalkingToHimself raps as a homophobic pastor]] who thinks Jesus will turn gay men straight despite his own [[PedophilePriest sexual perversion]]. This is the most controversial pataphor of his whole career, as it often gets brought up as proof of Eminem's genuine, non-[[KayfabeMusic kayfabe]] desire to stab gay people. Eminem is a gay ally in real life, and the point of the song was to [[TheGadfly prove that, even if he's saying the worst stuff he can think of, it doesn't actually hurt people in real life]]; he's also expressed [[CreatorBacklash shame]] about "Criminal" in his later career, both in interviews and through his music (particularly in "Bad Guy"/"Parking Lot" on ''The Marshall Mathers LP 2'', where he's murdered in revenge for the song, [[TheyKilledKennyAgain then]] commits suicide because of it).

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* Comedian Lewis Black on his ''Red White and Screwed'' tour would like you to share his outrage about Bill Clinton's marital infidelity:
-->'''Lewis Black''': Is oral sex adultery? Yes! There is no fucking question! If [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curling curling]] is an Olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery! And oral sex should be an Olympic sport! Why? Because it's harder than curling, and if you're any good at it, [[AC:you deserve a medal!]]

* ''Fanfic/KingdomHeartsTheAntipode'': [[WesternAnimation/Frozen2013 Olaf]] makes an analogy about saving Anna by likening Hans to a human blizzard, which ''somehow'' turns into a plan to keep Anna warm by making a bonfire out of Hans' intestines. Kristoff is understandably [[BrainBleach disturbed]].

* ''Fanfic/KingdomHeartsTheAntipode'': [[WesternAnimation/Frozen2013 Olaf]] makes an analogy about saving Anna by likening Hans to a human blizzard, which ''somehow'' turns into a plan to keep Anna warm by making a bonfire out of Hans' intestines. Kristoff is understandably disturbed.

'Cause Fab said he looked like a fag at Mayweather's pad\\
Singin' to a man while he played piano\\
Man, oh man, that was a 24/7 special on the cable channel\\

The very next day, "Hey Fab, I'ma kill you!"

** A rare example from his later career is his verse in Music/NickiMinaj's "Roman's Revenge":

** A great example is his verse in "Forgot About Dre", which starts as a trivial simile ("I'm harder than [difficult thing]") but spirals out of control:
-->I'm harder than me tryna park a Dodge\\

** In "My Name Is", Slim smokes too much weed, falls over "faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast", and then immediately seduces the fat bitch (while her boyfriend attempts to plead that she's already taken).
** At the beginning of "Criminal", Slim says "my words are like a dagger with a jagged edge, that'll stab you in the head whether you're a [...]" before derailing into an obscene RhymingList of [[HeteronormativeCrusader slurs for sexual minorities]] that [[RuleOfCautiousEditingJudgment won't be repeated here]]. The metaphor continues into various homophobic scenarios where the gay men are looking at his crotch and Gianni Versace is saying he was murdered because he was too distracted checking out boys - and derails completely when Eminem starts rapping [[TalkingToHimself as a homophobic pastor]] who thinks Jesus will turn gay men straight despite his own [[PedophilePriest sexual perversion]]. This is the most controversial pataphor of his whole career, as it often gets brought up as proof of Eminem's genuine, non-[[KayfabeMusic kayfabe]] desire to stab gay people. Eminem is a gay ally in real life, and the point of the song was to [[TheGadfly prove that, even if he's saying the worst stuff he can think of, it doesn't actually hurt people in real life]]; he's also expressed [[CreatorBacklash shame]] about "Criminal" in his later career, both in interviews and through his music (particularly in "Bad Guy"/"Parking Lot" on ''The Marshall Mathers LP 2'', where he's murdered for the song, twice).

** A great example is his verse in "Forgot About Dre", which starts as a trivial simile ("I'm harder than [difficult thing]") but spirals out of control:

** In "My Name Is", Slim smokes too much weed, falls over "faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast", and then immediately seduces the fat bitch (while her boyfriend attempts to plead that she's already taken).
** At the beginning of "Criminal", Slim says "my words are like a dagger with a jagged edge, that'll stab you in the head whether you're a [...]" before derailing into an obscene RhymingList of [[HeteronormativeCrusader slurs for sexual minorities]] that [[RuleOfCautiousEditingJudgement won't be repeated here]], which then continues into various homophobic scenarios where the gay men are looking at his crotch and Gianni Versace is saying he was murdered because he was too distracted checking out boys - and then derails completely when Eminem starts rapping [[TalkingToHimself as a homophobic pastor]] who thinks Jesus will turn Slim straight despite his own [[PedophilePriest sexual perversion]]. This is the most controversial pataphor of his whole career, as it often gets brought up as proof of Eminem's genuine, non-[[KayfabeMusic kayfabe]] desire to stab gay people. Eminem is a gay ally in real life, the point of the song was to [[TheGadfly prove that, even if he's saying the worst stuff he can think of, it doesn't actually hurt people in real life]], and has expressed [[CreatorBacklash shame]] about "Criminal" in his later career, both in interviews and through his music.

* Early in Music/{{Eminem}}'s career, the violent content of his lyrics was usually [[BoastfulRap braggadocio]] extended into upsettingly detailed murder fantasies. A great example is his verse in "Forgot About Dre", which starts as a trivial simile ("I'm harder than [difficult thing]") but spirals out of control:

The trope generally follows one of two paths. The metaphor begins with a solid concept but quickly degenerates into a repetition of the actual situation only projected onto the metaphorical concepts. "YouCantMakeAnOmelette without [something much more unpleasant than breaking a few eggs]" seems to be particularly popular, perhaps because it lends itself well to BlackComedy. It is also possible for the metaphorical concept to [[AttentionDeficitOohShiny distract the speaker]] so that the metaphor is forgotten.

* ''Webcomic/QuestionableContent'' has fun with this from time to time. For [[http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=369 example.]]

** In another strip, [[EveryoneCallsHimBarkeep Osaka]] compares her heart to a sea. [[http://www.mangareader.net/azumanga-daioh/2/216 It's big, deep, and has octopuses and stuff in it.]]

->''"You screwed the pooch ''hard.'' Big time. But then you did the right thing: you took the dog to the free clinic, you raised the hybrid puppies...alright, not my best analogy."''

[[folder:Anime and Manga]]

* A RunningGag in the 90s anime adaption of ''Anime/SailorMoon'' featured Minako frequently doing this, to which the other characters (mainly Artemis) telling her that's not how the specific saying goes. Usually the jokes are a result of her misreading the kanji of whatever metaphor she's trying to implement. For example, when Minako's trying to justify to Usagi why she's at the arcade instead of studying:
-->'''Minako''': You know what they say, "All haste makes dancing!"\\
'''Motoki''' (''grimly''): I think you two ''should'' be studying.

'''Full-Time Panda:''' (''sweatdrops'') [[LampshadeHanging Your conversation is drifting]], Panda.

'''King Penguin:''' [[HairTriggerTemper You piss me off!]] You totally piss me off! (''cue her pecking panda'')

* ''Comicbook/{{Bookhunter}}'': Agent Bay preps the police for a dragnet, and ends his speech with:

-->''"This is where things cease to have names, where they cease to have form, where all that is left is '''fear''' and a smell something like what you get when you change a cat's litterbox in a poorly ventilated room. Or like those socks of yours -- come on, I know you've got 'em -- that stand up by themselves, and you put them on on a really hot day in those shoes that aren't made of leather but out of plastic, and you walk around all day, and then take them off... yeah. Like that. That -- and '''fear'''."''

* From ''Fanfic/CalvinAndHobbesTheSeries'': "OW! [[ItMakesSenseInContext Love just pecked my nose!]]"

--> '''Calvin:''' Kinda rolls of the tongue!\\

* ''WebVideo/DragonBallZAbridged'' has Broly described by his father as "a trump card, if the card literally turned over the table and shot the other player."

* ''WebVideo/SwordArtOnlineAbridged'' has this example from episode 3's narrator:
-->'''Sir Jack Dapper''': And in time, Kirito found that he could almost tolerate [the Moonlit Black Cats], much like a fat man tolerates the tapeworms in his intestines. And like those tapeworms, that guild burrowed deep into his innards, and gorged themselves on his leftovers, until they began causing abdominal pain and diarrhea. I realize the metaphor's breaking down a bit here, but granny Dapper didn't raise no quitters.

[[folder:Webcomics]]

-->“The superstores were viewed by the independent bookstores as dinosaurs that came to kill them — and they did,” said Al Greco, a book publishing expert and professor of marketing at Fordham University's Graduate School of Business Administration. “Today, it looks like the [[ArtisticLicenseAstronomy big bang]] has hit and now the dinosaurs are in peril.”

--->'''Torg''': It is a giant elevator to Hell with ghosts in the gas tank!\\
'''Riff''': Elevators don't use gas tanks.\\
'''Torg''': Right, bad analogy. How about... It's an inverted toaster popping the bread of us onto the "two eggs up, and a side of bacon" plate of Hell! ''With ghosts in the gas tank!''\\
'''Riff''': [[NoOneElseIsThatDumb Well, we know Torg's not possessed.]]

--->'''Torg''': Life is like a sandwich. Sometimes you eat it, and sometimes it eats you.\\
'''Riff''': What kind of sandwich are we talking about here?\\
'''Torg''': Pitbull salad sandwich.

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* Two examples appear in Gretchen's verse of "Meet the Plastics" in ''Theatre/MeanGirls'' TheMusical:
-->"If Regina is the sun, then I'm a disco ball\\
Cause I'm just as bright and fun, if you've had alcohol."\\\
"Regina is the queen, but I'm the head of worker bees.\\
As I am seated at her right hand like a Jewish Princess Jesus."

* In ''Theatre/{{Fangirls}}'', Lily starts describing how a crush is perfectly named because it feels like your internal organs are being crushed. However, she attempts to elaborate with another analogy about being a dental floss dispenser, only for them to get mixed and she winds up describing having her intestines drawn out through her belly button.

--->''(On the ''Mortal Kombat'' remake) "I've made no secret of my feeling that one of the biggest recurring problems in the games industry is a case of too many cooks spoiling the broth. Development teams being too big, perhaps the industry as a whole being too big, with none of the cooks taking any personal responsibility for the broth so you end up with a lot of gluey unseasoned broth that is just about inoffensive enough to be palatable to mainstream broth audiences but isn't exactly getting five star write-ups in Broth Monthly. And almost inevitably there'll be a few cooks who want to be able to pad their resume and perhaps one day join a better broth making corporation that will let them have creative control of the broth, so they put a lot of effort into polishing the carrots that are their sole responsibility, and then everyone feels like they have to make the carrots float to the top all the time and show off how well polished they are, but the broth isn't supposed to be about the carrots so I just get kind of put off by the way these carrots are being pushed in my face while I'm trying to enjoy the beef cubes and the radishes. I think this is already the best metaphor I've ever written."''

* ''WebAnimation/FreedomToons'': "The Fable of Jordan Peterson" at one point parodies Jordan Peterson's use of archetype and metaphor to express meaning and life lessons.
-->'''Jordan Peterson:''' You think she's telling the truth? Yeah, sure. Just like Literature/LittleRedRidingHood, walking down a path to grandma's house... but then it turns out, it's not grandma... it's TheBigBadWolf... and he gobbles you up! ...and that's how you get UsefulNotes/NaziGermany.

* In ''{{Webcomic/Prequel}}'', the guardian spirit starts off its comforting speech to Katia by giving her the 'When life gives you lemons' speech.
-->'''Guardian Spirit:''' You see… Khajiit person… sometimes life gives you lemons. And when that happens… you need to find some spell that makes lemons explode, because lemons are terrible. I only ate them once and I can say with certainty they are the worst fruit. If life gave me lemons, I would view it as nothing short of a declaration of war.

* ''Webcomic/HarkAVagrant'''s [[http://www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=300 take on Queen Elizabeth]] is this trope, gone crazy:
-->'''Queen Bess:''' My beloved people, I know that I have the body of a weak and feeble woman, but I have the heart and stomach of a ''king''... [[WingPull And the WINGSPAN of an ALBATROSS!]][[note]]And the left hook of a heavyweight champ![[/note]]
* ''Webcomic/TheAdventuresOfDrMcNinja''. On [[http://drmcninja.com/archives/comic/25p65/ this page]], Judy the gorilla smashes Dr [=McNinja=] ([[ItMakesSenseInContext disguised as Dr. McLuchador]]) into a tree, hard enough to shatter the tree. The AltText reads, "Make like a tree, and shatter into a million pieces."
* ''Webcomic/BetweenFailures'' has [[http://betweenfailures.com/comics1/898-sneak-attack this]] lovely gem:
-->'''Nina:''' It's like a tree lighting ceremony. Except there are two trees, and one wants to make sweet love to the other.
* Occurs in [[http://www.paranatural.net/index.php?id=231 this]] ''Webcomic/{{Paranatural}}'' strip.
* ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'': "[[https://www.schlockmercenary.com/2018-03-25 Don't kick, don't bite, and don't whine about the close quarters]]. Just stew in your own angry juices like a fresh can of condensed whoopass. Except this is a relief mission. No whooping. ...I need a better selection of canned goods."
* ''WebComic/DarthsAndDroids'': Combined with a minor HurricaneOfPuns in [[https://www.darthsanddroids.net/episodes/1437.html episode 1437]]:
--> '''Wedge''': We're eating these [=PIEs=] [the equivalent of TIE fighters] for breakfast, but there are more incoming.
--> '''R2''': Don't forget to leave one for me.
--> '''Wedge''': Maybe they think we're too full to handle them.
--> '''Lando''': [[Film/TheLordOfTheRingsTheFellowshipOfTheRing I don't think they know about second breakfast.]] We're about to serve up some justice.

* ''Film/WhatsUpTigerLily'' opens with creator Creator/WoodyAllen explaining why he was approached to do a spy movie:
-->''"If you know me at all, you know that death is my bread, and danger my butter. Oh no, no, ''danger'' is my bread and ''death'' is my butter. No no, wait, danger is my bread, ...death, no, death? No, I'm sorry, death is my... Death and danger are my various breads and, and various butters."''
* ''Film/EarthGirlsAreEasy'' - manicurist Valerie is willing to patch things up with her cheating fiance, but has to put her foot down:
-->''"A relationship is a lot like a porcelain nail, Ted. You can break it, and you can glue it back together, but it's not going to be as strong as it was unless the person is really committed to not bringing home nurses!"''
* [[Film/IronMan Tony Stark]], toward the end of ''Film/SpiderManHomecoming'':
-->''"You screwed the pooch hard, big time. But then you did the right thing: took the dog to the free clinic, you raised the hybrid puppies... alright, not the best analogy."''
* Dave does this to one of Buddy's analogies in ''Film/AngerManagement'' when he starts describing the kind of angry person he is.
--> '''Buddy''': There are two kinds of angry people in this world: explosive and implosive. Explosive is the kind of individual you see screaming at the cashier for not taking their coupons. Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet day after day, and finally shoots everyone in the store. You're the cashier.
--> '''Dave''': No no no, I'm the guy hiding in the frozen food section dialing 911, I swear.
* ''Film/TheArtOfTheSteal'': During an argument with Nicky, Crunch starts ranting about how {{Con Artist}}s are supposed to have a code that makes them better than the thugs and gangsters of the world and how it may be horseshit:
-->'''Crunch:''' But I bought into that horeshit, Nicky! And you, you just trample all over that horsehsit. And you just, now you, you got shit all over your, your boots, you know. You, you just...you, you got shitty boots.\\
'''Nick:''' Hey, the analogy's breaking down.

* In ancient history, a non-comedic version of this is referred to as a "Homeric Simile". This is based on instances in Literature/TheIliad and Literature/TheOdyssey where the narrator starts off comparing two things, then continues into minute details that are seemingly unnecessary. For instance, if someone was feeling happy, the story might say:
-->''"His joy was as warm as the joy that shipwrecked sailors might feel when they catch sight of land after Poseidon has struck down their well-rigged ship on the open sea with gale winds and crushing walls of waves, with only a few surviving, swimming, struggling out of the frothing surf to reach the shore, their bodies crusted with salt but buoyed up with glee as they plant their feet on solid ground."''

* In ''Literature/SoLongAndThanksForAllTheFish'', hitchhiking alien Ford Prefect has a dream in which he encounters a new life form emerging from a polluted New York river. When the creature asks him what life is like he responds:
-->''"Life is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have a half a one for breakfast."''
* [[Literature/ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents Lemony Snicket]] seems to have an affinity for strange and humorous metaphors of this kind.
** ''The Beatrice Letters'' has, "The day was as cold and bitter as hot chocolate if it had been put in a fridge for several hours and filled with vinegar."
** In ''The Penultimate Peril'', there is: "Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree, because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch, or you might simply get covered in sap, and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors, where it is harder to get a splinter."
* From [[https://www.msu.edu/~haasadam/thoughts.htm Jack Handey's Deep Thoughts]]

* From the Literature/EighthDoctorAdventures:
** "Pleased with his metaphor, Fitz attempted to extend it."
** Even [[CloserToEarth Anji]] [[NotSoAboveItAll has been guilty of this]]. [[ExaggeratedTrope Very guilty]].
--->''"The thing about it was, though, that if you knew there was something to know, and you hadn't been told about it, there was no way you could keep your mind from worrying about what it might be – like a tongue forever probing at an imperfection in a tooth, while you're wondering whether, if you ever pluck up enough courage to go to the dentist about it, it's going to be merely some calcine accumulation that can be simply blasted away, or the sort of root-canal job that leaves you unable to eat for three days for fear of disturbing what feels like three tons of amalgam."''

* This trope occurs regularly in William Langland's 14th Century NarrativePoem, ''Piers Plowman'', which is famous for its abstruse allegorical method which consistently stretches metaphors way further than their comfortable limits. See, for instance, the explanation of the Trinity as Hand (fingers, palm and fist) and Candle (taper, flame, and wax) in Passus 17 of the B text.
* In ''Literature/JeevesAndWooster'' Bertie sometimes falls into this while narrating. ''Very Good, Jeeves!'' gives us this gem:
-->''"One of the first lessons life teaches us is that on these occasions of back-chat between the delicately-nurtured a man should retire into the offing, curl up in a ball, and imitate the prudent tactics of the opossum, which, when danger is in the air, pretends to be dead, frequently going to the length of hanging out crepe and instructing its friends to stand round and say what a pity it all is."''
* In ''Literature/KillTimeOrDieTrying'' Nathan discourages dating within the club with the saying 'You don't poop where you eat'. He tries to stretch this metaphor to explain to Brad why long-distance relationships are a bad idea, saying 'You don't mail your poop to Bloemfontein either, Brad.'
* In the ''Literature/MediochreQSethSeries'', Mediochre has several.
-->'''Mediochre''': This whole scene could have stepped out of a cheesy fantasy adventure were it not for the fact that scenes are incapable of stepping anywhere due to severe deficiency in the foot department.
* Jack's explanation of all the different worlds in Literature/SpiderCircus becomes this. It's something to do with knitting baskets and wool, and cracks in the wool.
* A RunningGag in ''Literature/TheReckonersTrilogy'' is that the narrator, David, is ''horrifically'' bad at metaphors, resulting in things like "banana farm for guns," "brick made of porridge," and "ninja alligators." And that's ''before'' he starts overthinking them.
-->''"Megan’s eyes could have drilled holes through... well, anything, I guess. I mean, eyes can’t normally drill holes through things, so the metaphor works regardless, right?"''
* A lot of the humor in ''Literature/HelpMyStoryHasTheMarySueDisease'' is based on this. For example:
-->''"Trust that your readers aren’t goldfish. (If they were goldfish, you’d already be world famous for teaching fish how to read and the problems with your writing wouldn’t actually matter anymore, because, holy shit, you taught fish how to read.)"''

* From Music/TimMinchin's beat poem ''Storm'': "I'm becoming aware that I'm staring / I'm like a rabbit, suddenly trapped / in the blinding headlights of vaccuous crap."

* Music/JonLajoie's "MC Vagina" persona is fond of this - in his case, the metaphor usually ''starts out'' nonspecific, vague, and blunt, and then moves right into non sequitur as he overexplains it.
-->My love is like lightning: it gives girls orgasms. My dick is like an airplane: it gives girls orgasms.\\
Yeah, the Eiffel Tower is a lot like my dick: it's big and it stings when soap gets inside the tip.\\
My lyrics are like the movie ''Film/DieHardWithAVengeance'': they're awesome... and Creator/JeremyIrons is a good bad guy.

* A RunningGag in ''Radio/{{Nebulous}}'' is that the eponymous professor will take his {{Technobabble}} metaphors to breaking point and beyond. For example:
-->'''Nebulous:''' The whole of the universe is unravelling into a massive coincidence like a badly knit cardigan caught on the wire of coincidence. A whole sleeve has already gone, and now the collar's starting to unravel. Un-knit 1, un-purl 1, un-knit 1, un...I'm drifting..
-->'''Nebulous:''' Doctor Klench is a chap who came to a crossroads in life and took a turning marked evil. He put his foot to the accelerator and he's not stopping. Not for pedestrians, not for a picnic, not for a toilet break, not- I'm drifting.
** Interestingly, Professor Nebulous always ''realizes'' he's doing it, and stops himself with the remark, "I'm drifting."

* Comedian Lewis Black on his ''Red White and Screwed'' tour would like you to share his outrage about Bill Clinton's marital infidelity:
-->'''Lewis Black''': Is oral sex adultery? Yes! There is no fucking question! If [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curling curling]] is an Olympic sport, then oral sex is adultery! And oral sex should be an Olympic sport! Why? Because it's harder than curling, and if you're any good at it, [[AC:you deserve a medal!]]
* The old Yakov Smirnoff joke, "Russian men have a saying: 'Women are like buses...' That's it."

* From ''Theatre/PassingStrange'': "...They mimic the phallo-centric narrative of 'verse, chorus, verse, chorus, climax, fade out, smoke a cigarette, turn over, snore all night and never call me again--'"
** "You know, absence really does make the heart grow into a state of mind which somehow transforms what you once could not stand about your family into a somehow quaint pleasure-giving construct."
* The [[UsefulNotes/AbrahamLincoln other thing]] ''Our American Cousin'' is famous for.

* For the ''Theatre/AvenueQ'' song "The More You Ruv Someone":
-->'''Christmas Eve''': Love!\\
'''Kate Monster''': ''Love!''\\
'''Christmas''': And hate!\\
'''Kate''': ''And hate!''\\
'''Christmas''': They like two brothers!\\
'''Kate''': ''Brothers!''\\
'''Christmas''': Who go on a date!\\
'''Kate''': ''Who''... [[DoubleTake what?]]

* Two examples appear in Gretchen's verse of "Meet the Plastics" in Mean Girls the musical:

* In ''Manga/{{Yellow}}'', Taki and Goh get into an argument about whether Taki or the women who go after him are "like moths to a flame." Amusingly this leads to an attempted kiss on Goh's part and this exchange:
-->'''Taki:''' What are you doing?!\\
'''Goh:''' My kiss is like moth balls.
* In ''Manga/GreatTeacherOnizuka'', the eponymous Onizuka once described love as "That magical spark between two people that you hope won't start a fire and burn them both to death."

* A RunningGag in the 90s anime adaption of ''Anime/SailorMoon'' featured Minako frequently doing this, to which the other characters (mainly Artemis) telling her that's not how the specific saying goes. Usually the jokes are a result of her misreading the kanji of whatever metaphor she's trying to implement. For example, when Minako's trying to justify to Usagi why she's at the arcade instead of studying:
-->'''Minako''': You know what they say, "All haste makes dancing!"
-->'''Motoki''' (''grimly''): I think you two ''should'' be studying.

* ''What The?!'' parodying the narration in ComicBook/ManThing, describing the swamp:
-->''"This is where things cease to have names, where they cease to have form, where all that is left is '''fear''' and a smell something like what you get when you change a cat's litterbox in a poorly ventilated room. Or like those socks of yours -- come on, I know you've got 'em -- that stand up by themselves, and you put them on on a really hot day in those shoes that aren't made of leather but out of plastic, and you walk around all day, and then take them off... yeah. Like that. That -- and '''fear'''."''

* In ''ComicStrip/{{Frazz}}'', Caulfield once asked if life is a journey, and a sled ride is a journey, does that mean that the sled ride is a simile?

* Lampshaded in the ''My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic'' TrollFic ''Fanfic/TheSpiderses'':
-->''it was like a crunchy potato chip bag full of chips got throwed into an chainlink fence and i dont know wer this metaphor goesing. amynore.''
* In ''Fanfic/FromTheFlameToTheSpark'' Sirius refers to fate as both male and female, prompting the following exchange.
-->'''Ginny:''' Her? I thought we were kicking fate in the balls.\\
'''Sirius:''' Oh no, that's Destiny. He's the bastard who shags Fate and knocks her up with prophecies, remember?\\
'''Ginny:''' I think your metaphor took the Knight Bus to Stonehenge.

* ''WebVideo/SwordArtOnlineAbridged'' has this example from episode 3's narrator:
-->'''Sir Jack Dapper''': And in time, Kirito found that he could almost tolerate [the Moonlit Black Cats], much like a fat man tolerates the tapeworms in his intestines. And like those tapeworms, that guild burrowed deep into his innards, and gorged themselves on his leftovers, until they began causing abdominal pain and diarrhea. I realize the metaphor's breaking down a bit here, but granny Dapper didn't raise no quitters.
* ''Fanfic/TheNewAdventuresOfInvaderZim'' has this bit of narration from Episode 2, when [[OurVampiresAreDifferent Norlock]] first realizes just how oblivious most humans are to beings like him:
-->[He felt] like a wolf among the sheep. Admittedly, a very large wolf among a bunch of sheep who all appeared to be blind and deaf, and probably collectively lacking a sense of smell too… [[LampshadeHanging where was he going with this again?]]
* ''WebVideo/DragonBallZAbridged'' has Broly described by his father as "a trump card, if the card literally turned over the table and shot the other player."
* A ''Franchise/SilentHill'' fanfic which is sadly(?) lost for good:
-->"OMFG" cried James, flopping in the monster's strong arms like a fish. A fish that was about to be raped.
* [[http://archiveofourown.org/works/676426 John and Dave Write a Bad Smut Scene]]: "He was going to fuck him good and hard, and he was going to like it better than the piece of greasy pizza he'd eaten for lunch that afternoon. Piece of ass before piece of pizza, except when it's already occurred."

--->'''Clint:''' "And, like, you know what they say about that - once is an accident, twice is coincidence..."
--->'''Natasha:''' "Thrice is enemy action?"
--->'''Clint:''' "Ye - No! No, your enemies would not want you to be an Avenger. That is definitely not... a thing they want you to do. [[LampshadeHanging Aw, metaphor.]]"

* ''Film/BallsOfFury'' has this:
-->Ping pong... is not the macarena. It takes patience. She is like a fine, well-aged prostitute... it takes years to learn her tricks. She is cruel, laughs at you when you are naked, but you keep coming back for more, and more! Why? Because she is the only prostitute I can afford!

* The educational short ''Drugs Are Like That'' really doesn't know what the metaphor it's going for is. Drugs are compared to Legos, cookies, swimming, toys, and pacifiers. Then they say that the human body is like a ''perpetual motion machine that the characters make out of Legos'' (!!) and that moving one piece causes it to ''[[ArtisticLicenseBiology explode]]'' -- "Drugs are like that!" This is all narrated by [[CulturePolice Anita Bryant.]]
* ''Film/HotShots:''
-->'''Topper:''' My father used to say that not playing to win is like sleeping with your sister. Sure she's a great piece of tail, with a blouse full of goodies, but, it's just illegal. Then you get into that whole inbred thing. Kids with no teeth who do nothing but play the banjo ... eat apple sauce through a straw ... pork farm animals.
* ''Film/{{Magicians}}'' briefly has two spectators muse on the sight of two magicians, who formerly had a successful and well-respected double act going before one slept with the other's wife and the other accidentally decapitated said wife during a trick with a guillotine, reuniting for the first time in four years to perform together:
-->'''Spectator 1''': It's like Israel and Palestine.\\
'''Spectator 2''': ... Entering a magic competition together.
* One of the common ''Film/TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'' callbacks replies to Riff Raff's lines:
-->"Say goodbye to all of this..."
--->''Goodbye, all this!''
-->"And hello... to oblivion."
--->''Hi, Oblivion! How's the wife and kids?''\\
''Your wife, my kids!''
* In ''Film/AnimalHouse'', the Dean says:
-->''It's time someone put his foot down around here, and that foot is me.''

* ''Film/KissKissBangBang''
-->'''First Hitman:''' Well now, here we all are. Ike, Mike and Mustard.\\
'''Harry:''' What the hell does that mean?\\
'''Second Hitman:''' You know, I'm with him on this one, man. [[LampshadedTheObscureReference That's pretty fucking obscure]].\\
'''First Hitman:''' Horse shit, I hear that all the time!\\
'''Second Hitman:''' You do?\\
'''First Hitman:''' Yeah, sure.\\
'''Second Hitman:''' Where, at the 1942 club?\\
'''First Hitman:''' Hey, just 'cause you didn't get in...\\
'''Second Hitman:''' Motherfucker, I could've gotten in!\\
''(later)''\\
'''First Hitman:''' You wanna know who we are? I'm the frying pan, see? And my boy over here, he's?\\
'''Second Hitman:''' Mustard. I'm Mustard, baby.
* Dennis uses a couple of these in ''Film/SurvivingEden'':
-->''"Relationships are just like pigs. Feed 'em too much slop, and they'll get too fat. Feed 'em too little, and they'll break up with you."''\\\
''(confronting his fiancée, supposedly carrying his child) "Guess what, Adam and Eve got kicked out of Eden, you wanna know why? Because Eve wasn't really pregnant!"''

* The opening narration of ''Film/OutCold'' has [[TalkativeLoon Stumpy]] comparing Bull Mountain to a woman, then switching over to a discourse on skiing injuries that has nothing to do with women, then ending on a note that would make his soliloquy a good comparison of a ''woman'' to the ''mountain'', but making absolutely no sense the other way around.
* In ''Film/TheOtherGuys'', after [[AnalogyBackfire pointing out the flaws in Terry comparing himself to a lion going after a tuna]], Allen continues to spin a scenario where the school of tuna build an apparatus that lets them go on land and hunt down the lion's family.
* From ''[[Film/ThirteenGoingOnThirty 13 Going On 30]]'':
-->'''Tom-Tom''': Okay, you can wipe off the "doe-eyed WesternAnimation/{{Bambi}} watching her mother get shot [[CrossesTheLineTwice strapped to the back of a van]]" look from your face!
* In ''Film/TheSocialNetwork'', Sean Parker uses the metaphor of a fisherman having his photo taken with one big Marlin instead of 15 trout. Eduardo goes into all the technical details, like how much a Marlin could weigh in real life and how strong the fisherman would have to be, while an irate Mark tells him that he's ComicallyMissingThePoint.
* In ''Film/LuckyNumberSlevin'':
-->'''Sloe:''' You got some ID?\\
'''Slevin:''' See, the funny thing about that is I got mugged this morning...\\
'''Sloe:''' ''(interrupting)'' Look, look! Tell it to the one-legged man, so he can bump it off down the road.\\
''(awkward silence)''
* ''Film/AceVenturaWhenNatureCalls'':
-->''Ace:'' I shall slip amongst them, like an unseen... thing!
* ''Film/KillBill'': "...But you're ''not'' a worker bee. You're a renegade killer bee."

* ''Film/TheOddCoupleII'': Oscar and Felix painfully go through several different metaphors, before Oscar says he can't remember what they started out talking about.
* ''Film/LoadedWeapon1'' does this in a battle of wits, ''[[LampshadeHanging then points it out]]''.
-->'''Morters''': Where's the microfilm, Mike?\\
'''[=McCracken=]''': I don't know, I gave it to York. I thought she was one of your men.\\
'''Morters''': Act in haste, repent in leisure.\\
'''[=McCracken=]''': But he who hesitates is lost.\\
'''Morters''': Never judge a book by its cover.\\
'''[=McCracken=]''': What you see is what you get.\\
'''Morters''': Loose lips sink ships.\\
'''[=McCracken=]''': [[Music/TheBeatles Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing or fighting my friend.]]\\
''(Mr. Jigsaw consults Bartlett's Familiar Quotations, shakes his head)''

* ''Film/ANightAtTheRoxbury'':
-->'''Steve''': Dad, it's like this. Doug is like a fax machine. You keep putting things in, but if it doesn't have a cover page, people don't know where it's coming from. And sometimes you get a busy signal. That's why you have a memory button, and a redial button... Actually I never use those, I always screw them up.
* John Lennon does a visual gag in ''Film/AHardDaysNight'' where he pretends to snort a bottle of soda pop, as in "snorting coke" -- but it's a bottle of Pepsi!

* ''Film/TheWorldsEnd'': "And this time we're going to see it to the bitter end! ...Or lager end."

* The low-budget sci-fi movie ''Film/{{ROTOR}}'' has lots of these, such as "You fire me and I’ll make more noise than two skeletons making love in a tin coffin, brother."

* Whatever [[https://i.redd.it/k2uz4dd08lq61.jpg this tweet]] by the Chinese embassy in Ireland was suppose to be. It starts with the term "wolf warrior" (a term used critically to describe aggressive Chinese diplomats on social media) and goes downhill from there. The poster probably wanted to flip the comparison around around and call the west the wolf (by using a fable where a wolf stops at nothing to slander a sheep). But [[BigBadassWolf wolves are cool]] and we can't have China be a puny sheep!

* ''Webcomic/HarkAVagrant'''s [[http://www.harkavagrant.com/index.php?id=300 take on Queen Elizabeth]] is this trope gone CrazyAwesome.

->''"Look, you screwed the pooch hard. Big time. But then you did the right thing: you took the dog to the free clinic, you raised the hybrid puppies...alright, not my best analogy."''