History Literature / TheToughGuideToFantasyLand

28th Apr '17 12:28:46 PM Theriocephalus
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* OurGoblinsAreDifferent: Basically tiny Orcs who live underground. They like to capture human travellers ([[ZergRush their chief tactic while doing so seems to consist of throwing bodies at them until the enemy is overwhelmed]]) and then torture them. They don't seem to do much else.

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* OurGoblinsAreDifferent: Basically tiny Orcs Scaly little humanoids who live underground. They like to capture human travellers ([[ZergRush their chief tactic while doing so seems to consist of throwing bodies at them until the enemy is overwhelmed]]) and then torture them. They don't seem to do much else.
19th Mar '17 6:32:20 PM Fireblood
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* EvilOverlord: The Dark Lord, one of whom exists for every Tour trying to destroy everything. However, they can be defeated fairly easily by Tourists near the finale. There are no Dark Ladies, for it seems the Management finds them less sinister.
19th Mar '17 6:25:17 PM Fireblood
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* IKnowYourTrueName: Using PunctuationShaker names is used as a form of protection against this.

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* IKnowYourTrueName: Using PunctuationShaker names is possibly used as a form of protection against this.



* MadeASlave: Two ways this can happen:

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* MadeASlave: Two There're two ways this can happen:
19th Mar '17 5:16:43 PM Theriocephalus
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* DeathMountain: The map features a range of peaks named the Death Mountains in the far north. More generally, the mountains most Tourists will have to cross tend to feature impossibly high, sharp peaks and steep cliffs that don’t seem to have ever been eroded, leading Jones to conclude Fantasyland has never gone through an ice age. This is where you’ll find dwarves, as well as cliff-dwelling clans that live alongside telepathic eagles and hawks.



* ExtrudedBookProduct: The main purpose of this book is to parody the kind of unoriginal, formulaic copycats of Tolkien and Conan novels that seem to flood modern fantasy literature.



* HawaiianShirtedTourist: The [[https://pictures.abebooks.com/isbn/9781568659510-us.jpg cover]] of at least the Daw Books, 1996 edition of The Tough Guide to Fantasyland pictures tourists dressed this way.

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* HawaiianShirtedTourist: The [[https://pictures.abebooks.com/isbn/9781568659510-us.jpg cover]] of at least the Daw Books, 1996 edition of The ''The Tough Guide to Fantasyland Fantasyland'' pictures tourists dressed this way.



* MadeASlave:

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* MadeASlave:MadeASlave: Two ways this can happen:
** Most male Tourists will be captured and enslaved at some point on their Quest, and will become galley slaves or gladiators, at which point they’ll have to win back their freedom.
** The daughters of merchants who were brought along with the caravan will be captured when bandits will inevitably attack; they appear to be the only source of harem slaves.


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* OurOrcsAreDifferent: For all practical purposes, they’re a bigger, better version of goblins used by the Dark Lord.


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* RunningGag: When describing the various peoples you’ll meet on your quest, (elves, dragons, dwarves, marsh dwellers, island people, etc.) Jones mentions in each entry how each group seems to have “a form of magic that no one else can use”. There do not seem to be exceptions. Depending on how many of these groups you meet, you may end up with more examples of exclusive magic than of the regular kind.


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* SwampsAreEvil: Jones distinguishes two kinds: Bogs are essentially patches of deep mud put in your way to slow you down when being chased by Evil in order to provide dramatic tension. Marshes show up later and involve more of the traditional swampland dangers -- swarms of insects, filthy water, mazelike channels and so on.


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* WackyWaysideTribe: Your Tour is certain to include a great deal of people, tribes and incidents that will have little or nothing to do with the theoretical main plot of overthrowing the Dark Lord. Jones goes in great detail on each kind of Tribe you’re likely to come across.
17th Mar '17 4:00:57 PM Theriocephalus
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* EncyclopediaExposita: The entire book is one.
* EntitledToHaveYou: The {{deconstruction}} of RescueSex has shades of this, saying that because the hero nobly refuses to sleep with the slave girl when her wicked master offers her to him ("what they don't do") and helps her escape ("what they do") he then gets to have sex with her.



* EvilMatriarch: The "bad mother" variety of bad queen.
* EvilPrince: It seems to depend on whether or not he's recognized as royalty or incognito. If he ''is'' recognized, then he'll be some variant of cruel, spoiled and/or outright murderous, otherwise he'll be TheGoodPrince.



* EncyclopediaExposita: The entire book is one.
* EntitledToHaveYou: The {{deconstruction}} of RescueSex has shades of this, saying that because the hero nobly refuses to sleep with the slave girl when her wicked master offers her to him ("what they don't do") and helps her escape ("what they do") he then gets to have sex with her.
* EvilMatriarch: The "bad mother" variety of bad queen.
17th Mar '17 3:42:34 PM Theriocephalus
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* VainSorceress: The Enchantress.

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* TheUnpronounceable: The names of the inhabitants of [=PanCeltic=] Tours (fantasy novels that copy Celtic mythology instead of Tolkien and Conan) will almost always be unpronounceable strings of what is probably supposed to sound like Irish, with far too many h's crammed in there.
* VainSorceress: The Enchantress. The Guide outright says "Enchantress" is "another word for seductress, only with more punch".
17th Mar '17 11:16:03 AM Theriocephalus
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* SlaveGalley: If a male character is enslaved, chances are he'll probably wind up chained to an oar in one of these. Jones notes that it's a bit difficult to understand why these things are even built and sailed, since rows of chained-up rowers are the only things these galleys ever contain.

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* SlaveGalley: If a male character is enslaved, chances are he'll probably wind up chained to an oar in one of these. Jones notes that that, since these galleys only ever seem to contain rows of chained-up slaves and nothing in the way of merchandise or soldiers, it's a bit difficult to understand why these things are even built and sailed, since rows of chained-up rowers are the only things these galleys ever contain.people keep building them.
17th Mar '17 11:13:05 AM Theriocephalus
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* SlaveGalley: If a male character is enslaved, chances are he'll probably wind up chained to an oar in one of these.

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* SlaveGalley: If a male character is enslaved, chances are he'll probably wind up chained to an oar in one of these. Jones notes that it's a bit difficult to understand why these things are even built and sailed, since rows of chained-up rowers are the only things these galleys ever contain.
16th Mar '17 7:06:56 AM Fireblood
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* FantasyCounterpartCulture: A whole bunch of them, lamp shading the ones most common in unoriginal fantasy novels.

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* FantasyCounterpartCulture: A whole bunch of them, lamp shading lampshading the ones most common in unoriginal fantasy novels.



* LivingForeverIsAwesome: One way humans can be immortal is through being a magic user. These immortals largely seem to largely enjoy their eternal lives.

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* LivingForeverIsAwesome: One way humans can be immortal is through being a magic user. These immortals largely seem to largely enjoy their eternal lives.
16th Mar '17 6:22:40 AM Theriocephalus
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* BeneathTheEarth: You’ll inevitably have to cross an extensive system of Caverns during your tour. Here you’ll find plenty of stalactites and stalagmites, areas with rocks that glow on their own (these will very conveniently show up around the same time your torches fail) and an assortment of interesting creatures, including troglodytic humans and dragons.

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* BeneathTheEarth: You’ll inevitably have to cross Cavern systems are a common feature of the Tour. Unlike real cave expeditions, light will rarely be an extensive system of Caverns during issue -- if your tour. Here you’ll find plenty of stalactites and stalagmites, torches fail while you're down there, you'll probably come across areas with rocks that glow on their own (these will very conveniently show up around the same time your torches fail) and an assortment of interesting creatures, including troglodytic humans and dragons.by themselves.



* BiggerOnTheInside: The Guide notes that most buildings in Fantasyland appear larger inside than their outside would suggest. The exception to this are farmhouses, which are ''smaller'' on the inside -- on the outside they appear large and inviting, but inside there’s just a single downstairs room serving as kitchen and living room, and upstairs there’s just enough room for a hallway and some dingy sleeping quarters.

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* BiggerOnTheInside: The Guide notes that most buildings in Fantasyland appear larger inside than their outside would suggest. The An unusual exception to this are farmhouses, which are ''smaller'' on the inside -- on the outside they appear for some reason, these will seem large and inviting, inviting outside, but inside there’s just a single downstairs room serving as kitchen will be small and living room, and upstairs there’s just enough room for a hallway and some dingy sleeping quarters.poky inside.



* CityOfCanals: Cited by name as one possible location tourists may visit. Its canals will be full of filth and it will likely be ruled by a council of corrupt merchant-princes.

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* CityOfCanals: Cited by name as one possible location tourists may visit. Its canals will be full of filth filthy and it will likely be ruled by a council of corrupt merchant-princes.



* FantasyCounterpartCulture: A whole bunch of them.

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* FantasyCounterpartCulture: A whole bunch of them.them, lamp shading the ones most common in unoriginal fantasy novels.



* HighPriest: Always evil. Sometimes thin and evil, sometimes fat and evil, but always evil. He’ll be quite corrupt and won’t actually believe in his god, and will be chiefly concerned with acquiring wealth, power, catamites and concubines. You may also meet a High Priestess. Regardless of whether she’s attractive and motherly or thin and severe, she’ll always be good.
* HornyVikings: The Barbary Vikings who live in the north of the world. They love killing, preferably many people at once, sail around in long ships with lines of shields down the side, and wear horned helmets and large fur cloaks. They are one of the malest peoples you will encounter.

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* HighPriest: Always evil. Sometimes thin and evil, sometimes fat and evil, but always evil. He’ll be quite corrupt and won’t actually believe in his god, and will be chiefly concerned with acquiring wealth, power, catamites and concubines. You may also meet a High Priestess. Regardless of whether she’s attractive and motherly or thin and severe, she’ll always be good.
* HornyVikings: The Barbary Vikings who live in the north of the world. They love killing, preferably many people at once, sail around in long ships with lines of shields down the side, killing and fighting, are skilled sailors, and wear the usual horned helmets and large fur cloaks.helmets. They are one of the malest peoples you will encounter.



* LittlePeople: There seems to be a wide assortment of them running about, from waist-high to shoulder-high. The really short kind will be the most humanlike, and they get hairier as they get larger, starting with the feet.
* LivingForeverIsAwesome: One way humans can be immortal is through being a magic user. These immortals largely seem to enjoy their eternal lives, and mostly have a good time living forever.

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* LittlePeople: There seems to be a wide assortment of them running about, from waist-high to shoulder-high. The really short kind about in various sizes and levels of hairiness. Some will likely be the most humanlike, and they get hairier as they get larger, starting with the feet.
copies of Tolkien's Hobbits.
* LivingForeverIsAwesome: One way humans can be immortal is through being a magic user. These immortals largely seem to largely enjoy their eternal lives, and mostly have a good time living forever.lives.



* LostWorld: In abundance. Fantasyland appears to have been losing bits of itself for quite a while.
* TheLostWoods: You will inevitably have to cross a Forest of Doom at some point in your quest, which will be home to mobile trees, giant spiders, and strange people who will try to sacrifice you to their god.

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* LostWorld: In abundance. Fantasyland appears There seems to be no scarcity of hidden valleys, kingdoms and so on that have been losing bits lost from the rest of itself the world for quite a while.
ages for the heroes to stumble across.
* TheLostWoods: You will inevitably have to cross a Forest An evil forest full of Doom at some point in your quest, which will be home to mobile trees, giant spiders, aggressive trees and strange people who will try to sacrifice you to their god.vicious monsters is mainstay of Tour quests.



* OurDwarvesAreAllTheSame: Naturally, the typical standard-issue dwarves show up in Fantasyland. They’re short and bearded, of course, and much given to mining, forging, bowing, grumbling, and reciting epics about their ancestors. They live in hidden Dwarven Fastnesses in the mountains, and will probably arrest the main characters for trespassing before being persuaded to join the forces of Good.
* OurElvesAreBetter: They are, as always, immortal (and always youthful), and wiser, more ethereal, more magical, better-looking and just generally better than humans, something they are fond of reminding human characters. They'll generally live in a dimension separate from the rest of Fantasyland, and will have powerful magic. They also claim to have been created as they now are by the gods, instead of having evolved from apes like humans. They have been in decline since humans turned up, and now most of the are passing West -- which here means they have been moving to the American Southwest, where they wear punk clothing and ride motorcycles.
* OurGnomesAreWeirder: They’re a small folk who live under the roots of trees and kidnap people for no particular reason. This is somewhat complicated by the fact that they do not always remember that humans need to eat and drink.
* OurGoblinsAreDifferent: They’re basically tiny Orcs who live underground, with scaly green skin and pointed ears. They like to capture human travellers ([[ZergRush their chief tactic while doing so seems to consist of throwing bodies at their swords until the enemy is overwhelmed]]) and then torture them. They don't seem to do much else.

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* OurDwarvesAreAllTheSame: Naturally, the typical bearded, surly and metal-loving standard-issue dwarves show up in Fantasyland. They’re short and bearded, of course, and much given to mining, forging, bowing, grumbling, and reciting epics about their ancestors. They live Fantasyland, living in hidden Dwarven Fastnesses fastnesses in the mountains, and will probably arrest the main characters for trespassing before being persuaded to join the forces of Good.
mountains.
* OurElvesAreBetter: They are, as per always, immortal (and always youthful), and wiser, more ethereal, more magical, better-looking and just generally better than humans, something they are fond of reminding human characters. They'll generally live in a dimension separate from the rest of Fantasyland, and will have powerful magic. They also claim to have been created as they now are by the gods, instead of having evolved from apes like humans. They have been in decline since humans turned up, and now most of the are passing West -- which here means they have been moving to the American Southwest, where they wear punk clothing and ride motorcycles.
* OurGnomesAreWeirder: They’re a small folk who live under the roots of trees underground and kidnap people for no particular reason. This is somewhat complicated by the fact that they do not always remember that humans need to eat and drink.
* OurGoblinsAreDifferent: They’re basically Basically tiny Orcs who live underground, with scaly green skin and pointed ears. underground. They like to capture human travellers ([[ZergRush their chief tactic while doing so seems to consist of throwing bodies at their swords them until the enemy is overwhelmed]]) and then torture them. They don't seem to do much else.
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