History Funny / StarTrekDeepSpaceNine

* The subversion of SpottingTheThread when Keiko starts to suspect a security video has been tampered with, as it shows O'Brien drinking coffee in the afternoon, which he never does. Then after she's proven right and everything's wrapped up, he asks for a coffee. When she says in confusion that he never drinks coffee in the afternoon, he says, "Sure I do."
* Doctor Bashir's fumbling attempts to thank O'Brien when everything's over, while the chief is with his wife.

* From the episode "[[Recap/StarTrekDeepSpaceNineS06E07YouAreCordiallyInvited You Are Cordially Invited]]":
** Worf and Martok are conversing about whether Jadzia can sufficiently impress Martok's wife Lady Sirella, who has veto power over the marriage (being that it would be bringing an outsider into House Martok, which is the lady's purview). Martok reveals that Sirella doesn't like Worf either, but then:
---> '''Martok:''' Don't let that bother you. I had every right to bring you into the family and she's accepted the fact that there's nothing she can do about it.\\

** Discussing the conditions of Worf's Klingon StagParty, the issue of it including a four-day fast arises. Martok remarks, "It is a short time, I know, but we will have to make do."
** When the crew of Deep Space Nine have agreed to join Worf's Klingon StagParty, which is like a human bucks party, minus the fun and with added pain.
--->''Scene shows O'Brien and Bashir hanging by the arms over hot rocks.''\\

** As part of the Klingon marriage tradition, Sisko, O'Brien, and Bashir are required to assault the newlyweds immediately after they tie the knot. After the ordeal they've been through, O'Brien and Bashir are... enthusiastic about this.
---> '''Martok:''' NOW!
---> '''Bashir & O'Brien:''' ''(Running like mad)'' EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
---> ''(SmashToBlack; thumping noises)''
** The first sign of trouble is, rather than the 4-day party the humans expected, they begin a 4-day fast and deal with extreme heat. This is the "Deprivation", the first of six stages. What are the other five? "[[ThisIsGonnaSuck Blood, pain, sacrifice, anguish, and death]]" - words you never want to hear from a Klingon in your direction.

*** Immediately after the stages are listed:
---->'''Bashir''': Sounds like marriage, all right.\\

*** Although it's notable that Martok and Worf are not present in the scenes where O'Brien and Bashir are undergoing deprivation, suggesting that the two Klingons are having a joke at the humans' expense.
*** Also absent during these scenes are Sisko and Alexander, the two most likely to call BS on what Worf and Martok are saying as they have better experience with "[[FanNickname Klingon Klaptrap]]," lending more credence to the thought that this is a joke at O'Brien and Bashir's expense.
*** And O'Brien and Bashir can't catch a break - they get a reprieve from the fasting when Dax and Worf call the wedding off, and just when they're about to get served a full course meal by Quark, they find out the wedding - and thus, the bachelor's fast - is back on. And you ''know'' that Quark still billed them for the food.
---->'''Sisko:''' Quark, take it all away. No food for those on the path to Kal'Hyah.\\

** The Klingon wedding ceremony involves swordplay and a promise by each to slay the other's enemies, which is written into the vows--because, well, ''of course'' it would be.
** The first trial of Worf's "bachelor party" requires ritual bloodletting. Worf and Martok ask for volunteers while their backs are turned, and Sisko, Alexander, and O'Brien take a step back without alerting Julian, making it seem like [[GotVolunteered he "volunteered."]]
--->'''Worf:''' I did not expect it to be you, Doctor.\\

* Poor [[Good Shepherd Vedek Bareil]], goes so far as to attempt to assault Sisko in his attempts to get to Dax. However, since Bareil is normally a pacifist. The Commander barely even registers the man's ''attacks''.

* Before the Universal Translator translated their language, a Skrreean woman pointed at a dress and said something. Kira buys the woman the dress, thinking she meant she liked it but really she meant she ''didn't'' like it. The best part is that Kira didn't like it either and both women start giggling and going on about how revolting they think the dress is.

'''Sisko''' ([[{{Troll}} huge grin]]): Yes it does!

* When Kira explains to the Mirror Bareil that they will have to climb up 57 levels in order to get the landing pad. The man let's out an audible sigh at the very thought.

-->'''Jake''': Just because ''you'' suffered through all that doesn't mean ''I'' have to.

* After Quark gets branded by the Circle, Sisko and co. pay him a visit, which results in a tense conversation about the state of the Bajoran provisional government. When Quark begins to say he intends to sue the government for financial conversation, Sisko cuts him off with an amazingly curt dismissal. It's totally sudden, but it couldn't have been said better.

*** And even funnier if you remember what we later learn about the Vorta: they're a race of clones whose sense of taste is largely limited to the foodstuffs they had before being genetically engineered, and are immune to most poisons, including alcohol. So, sorry, Quark, but looks like the Vorta ''also'' don't eat, don't drink, or have sex. (Although Weyoun is shown to really enjoy playing Dabo a few episodes down the line.)
*** All though it seems as though there was a minor missed opportunity for humor with Quark attempting to replicate a dish making use of kava nuts and rippleberries or some kind of "texture sampler" plate in a desperate attempt to earn at least some of his money.

* With his workers gone, Quark tries to replace them with holographic copies of himself that he bought from a passing merchant...which malfunction constantly in presense of various types of radiation present on the space station, causing them to keep dropping the drink orders on the floor when they dematerialize as a result.

* The idea that Dukat's superiors went out of their way to implement a secret program for the sole purpose of ensuring that, if Dukat ever lost control of the station or tried to blow it up, he couldn't leave everyone behind to beam away. They really knew [[DirtyCoward who they]]were [[ItsAllAboutMe dealing with]] here. Bonus points for another officer taking the time to record a video message to go along with it, where he just [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech tells Dukat how much he sucks.]]

* The idea that Dukat's superiors went out of their way to implement a secret program for the sole purpose of ensuring that, if Dukat ever lost control of the station or tried to blow it up, he couldn't leave everyone behind to beam away. They really knew [[DirtyCoward who they]] [[ItsAllAboutMe dealing with]] here. Bonus points for another officer taking the time to record a video message to go along with it, where he just [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech tells Dukat how much he sucks.]]

* Quark momentarily helping Odo by selling out one of his enemies. As he explains to Rom, "every one in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemy."