History Funny / StarTrekDeepSpaceNine

14th Sep '16 5:35:10 PM MythrilMothV3
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* Quark and Odo are discussing a potential threat on Quark's life.
--> '''Odo:''' "I have no reason to hold him for now and he knows it. I'll watch him the best I can, but I suggest you carry a comm badge with you at all times. Call me at the first sign of trouble."
--> '''Quark:''' "What if the first sign is the last sign?"
--> '''Odo:''' "You people sell pieces of yourself after you die, don't you?"
--> '''Quark:''' "Yes."
--> '''Odo:''' "I'll buy one."
6th Sep '16 2:05:00 PM DGCatAniSiri
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* As the episode starts, the wormhole has been opening and closing repeatedly for no apparent reason. When it finally returns to normal, Kira's mild dejection (as the wormhole is home to the Prophets, the gods of her people) leads to one of the best Worf lines in Star Trek history.
-->'''Kira:'''Part of me was hoping that the Prophets were behind it. That they were finally going to show themselves to the Bajoran people.
-->'''Worf:''' I prefer Klingon beliefs.
-->'''Kira:''' I suppose your gods aren't as cryptic as ours.
-->'''Worf:''' Our gods are dead. Ancient Klingon warriors slew them a millennia ago. They were more trouble than they were worth.
-->'''Kira:''' I don't think I'll ever understand Klingons.
-->'''O'Brien''' Don't worry about it, Major. Nobody does. That's the way they like it.




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* Horrible yet funny: Intendent Kira of the mirror universe is languishing in a jail cell and tries flirting with the guard. He snarls that she executed his wife.
--> '''Kira''': What a coincidence! I was hoping you weren't married!



* Worf's classic response when religion is being discussed and someone inquires about Klingon deities.
--> '''Worf''': Our gods are dead. Klingon warriors slew them many centuries ago....They were more trouble than they were worth.
* Horrible yet funny: Intendent Kira of the mirror universe is languishing in a jail cell and tries flirting with the guard. He snarls that she executed his wife.
--> '''Kira''': What a coincidence! I was hoping you weren't married!
6th Sep '16 1:54:01 PM DGCatAniSiri
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* "Barry Waddle"/Darvin [[HypocriticalHumor refers to the Klingons]] as 'foul-smelling barbarians.' [[RightBehindMe He then apologizes to Worf, standing right there.]]
--> '''O'Brien:''' I wouldn't take it personally, Worf.
--> '''Bashir:'''' I rather like the way you smell.
--> '''O'Brien:''' Yeah, sort of earthy, peaty aroma.
--> '''Bashir:''' With a touch of lilac. ''(Worf is not amused.)''
** Cut to later on the bridge of the Defiant, and O'Brien is chatting with Sisko and Dax.
--> '''O'Brien:''' Trust me. Next time you see him, just sniff the air and go 'is that lilac?'
--> '''Dax:''' Find somebody else. I have my own ways of torturing Worf.




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* Dax has caught the eye of past!Dukat, who has brought her to his office after an assassination attempt. He begins monologuing about how the Bajorans are children who look to him as a father.
--> '''Dukat:''' Bad manners are the fault of the parent, not the child. My weakness is I'm too generous, too forgiving. My heart is too big.
--> ''(With his back turned to her, Dax knocks him out.)''
--> '''Dax:''' [[ShutUpHannibal And so is your ego.]]
5th Sep '16 6:16:31 PM TMB
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*Garak once again twisting Bashir's sense of morality on its head with his reinterpretation of the story of the Boy who cried Wolf.
-->'''Garak''': Are you sure that's the moral of the story?
-->'''Bashir''': What else could it be?
-->'''Garak''': Never tell the same lie twice.


Added DiffLines:

*Odo asking Garak with some surprise in his voice if he'd really shoot a man in the back (when discussing Dukat in Way of the Warrior). Garak's simple "Well it's the safest way isn't it?"
3rd Sep '16 8:47:24 PM katrinahood
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* Quark hoping that Worf will say "thank you" to him.
-->'''Quark''': All I'm asking for is two little words.\\
'''Worf''': Be quiet!\\
'''Quark''': That's two words, all right, just not the two I was hoping for.
3rd Sep '16 8:19:33 PM katrinahood
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* Quark's reaction to getting his hand cut by a Klingon knife.
-->'''O'Brien''': It's supposed to hurt.
5th Aug '16 5:12:06 AM NoxSky12599
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* In the previous episode, Jake had stayed behind on the station to cover the Dominion occupation of Bajor for the Federation news service. When he finds out that [[SarcasmMode (surprise)]] the Dominion is blocking his reports from being sent out, he tries to invoke "freedom of the press". Weyoun gives him a WhatAnIdiot stare and says (in an almost pitying tone), "''Please'' tell me you're not ''that'' naive..."
1st Aug '16 11:21:32 AM katrinahood
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* Odo trying to wake up Quark, only for Quark to yell at him to stop hitting him.
* Quark's reason for bringing Odo with him when his leg got broken.
-->'''Quark:''' Don't you get it? I'm not trying to save you. I'm taking you along as emergency rations. If you die, I'm gonna eat you.
25th Jul '16 1:19:44 PM katrinahood
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* Worf's expression yelling "Get me out of here!" when Lwaxana is talking to Kira and Jadzia.
** Worf volunteering to go on a walk with Odo just to get out of the conversation he contributed nothing to.
25th Jul '16 12:54:37 PM katrinahood
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* Odo's face when Lwaxana tells him she's pregnant. His expression screams, "How am I going to get out of this?!" [[note]]No, Odo is not the father.[[/note]]
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