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** This Troper totally cracked up at this part:
--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. ({{Beat}}) Look at your life, look at your choices.

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** And then:
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You're gonna end up a stump!
-->'''Giving Tree:''' Yes! And he'll come back old and tired.
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' A-And what? You'll let him sit on your face? Gross, no!
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* ''RomeoAndJuliet:''

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* ''RomeoAndJuliet:''''Theatre/RomeoAndJuliet'':



* ''Cyrano de Bergerac'':

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* ''Cyrano de Bergerac'':''Theatre/CyranoDeBergerac'':



* ''The Giving Tree'':

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* ''The Giving Tree'':''Literature/TheGivingTree'':



* Henry VIII

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* Henry VIIIUsefulNotes/HenryVIII:
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* Later, we get this glorious pun:

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* ** Later, we get this glorious pun:

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* Later, we get this glorious pun:
-->'''Ms. Havisham:''' I've been so cruel...
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Well, you ''have'' been a total dick...ens character.

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** The friend pointing out the weirdness of the impetus for all this.
--> '''Lady Macbeth:''' Macbeth is going to be king. He heard it from the three witches this morning.
--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Okay, first of all, stop getting your political news from crazy old women who live in the bushes.
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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Yeah, and the guy from ''Silence of the Lambs'' needed fat girl skin to make a flesh suit. Doesn't mean we give it to him!

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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Yeah, and the guy from ''Silence of the Lambs'' needed fat girl skin to make a flesh suit. Doesn't mean we give it to him!him!

* Henry VIII
** "Henry, you can't chop off the heads of everybody that annoys you! If I did that, there'd be a whole bunch of necks working at the DMV and only three ''Series/DesperateHousewives''."
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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' No. It's the hospital. In heaven, Annette Bening wins the Oscar for ''TheKidsAreAllRight''! What, WHAT, ''what were you doing''?!

to:

-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' No. It's the hospital. In heaven, Annette Bening wins the Oscar for ''TheKidsAreAllRight''! ''Film/TheKidsAreAllRight''! What, WHAT, ''what were you doing''?!

Added: 231

Changed: 3

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* ''Cyrano de Bergerac''

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* ''Cyrano de Bergerac''Bergerac'':



* ''Literature/GreatExpectations''

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* ''Literature/GreatExpectations''''Literature/GreatExpectations'':



* ''Film/BlackSwan''

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* ''Film/BlackSwan''''Film/BlackSwan'':



-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ''THEY ARE NINETY-NINE CENTS AT CVS!!''

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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ''THEY ARE NINETY-NINE CENTS AT CVS!!''CVS!!''

* ''The Giving Tree'':
-->'''Giving Tree:''' He needed my branches to make a house.
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Yeah, and the guy from ''Silence of the Lambs'' needed fat girl skin to make a flesh suit. Doesn't mean we give it to him!
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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' No. It's the hospital. In heaven, Annette Bening wins the Oscar for ''TheKidsAreAllRight''! What, WHAT, ''what were you doing''?!

to:

-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' No. It's the hospital. In heaven, Annette Bening wins the Oscar for ''TheKidsAreAllRight''! What, WHAT, ''what were you doing''?!doing''?!
** And also:
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Buy some nail clippers!
-->'''Nina:''' I can't!
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ''THEY ARE NINETY-NINE CENTS AT CVS!!''

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** His reaction to Juliet telling him she slept with Romeo.
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ...you big slut, ''good for you!''
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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Why would you want to remember the worst moment of your life? ''I'' don't set ''my'' clocks to remind myself of the terrible night I spent with [[AChristmasCarol Jacob Marley]]!

to:

-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Why would you want to remember the worst moment of your life? ''I'' don't set ''my'' clocks to remind myself of the terrible night I spent with [[AChristmasCarol [[Literature/AChristmasCarol Jacob Marley]]!
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* ''GreatExpectations''

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* ''GreatExpectations''''Literature/GreatExpectations''
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namespace stuff Change


* ''{{Macbeth}}:''

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* ''{{Macbeth}}:''''Theatre/{{Macbeth}}:''



--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. ({{Beat}}) Look at your life, look at your choices.

to:

--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. ({{Beat}}) Look at your life, look at your choices.
choices.
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to:

** "Roxanne has a stripper's name! Who is ''she'' to judge?"
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--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. Look at your life, look at your choices.

to:

--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. ({{Beat}}) Look at your life, look at your choices.

Added: 206

Removed: 3

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**



-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' "Ew" is right. Ugh. A lot of chains, totally weird. And he's a ''ghost''... which is why I want to forget about it!

to:

-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' "Ew" is right. Ugh. A lot of chains, totally weird. And he's a ''ghost''... which is why I want to forget about it!it!

* ''Film/BlackSwan''
-->'''Nina:''' Is this heaven?
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' No. It's the hospital. In heaven, Annette Bening wins the Oscar for ''TheKidsAreAllRight''! What, WHAT, ''what were you doing''?!
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-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ''Yes!'' You're very talented. ''(turns to Cyrano)'' Back to you.

to:

-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' ''Yes!'' You're very talented. ''(turns to Cyrano)'' Back to you.you.

* ''GreatExpectations''
**
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' Why would you want to remember the worst moment of your life? ''I'' don't set ''my'' clocks to remind myself of the terrible night I spent with [[AChristmasCarol Jacob Marley]]!
-->'''Ms. Havisham:''' Ewww!
-->'''Sassy Gay Friend:''' "Ew" is right. Ugh. A lot of chains, totally weird. And he's a ''ghost''... which is why I want to forget about it!

Added: 101

Changed: 47

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to:

** This Troper totally cracked up at this part:
--> '''Sassy Gay Friend:''' You took a roofie from a priest. Look at your life, look at your choices.

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