History Funny / RifftraxVideoGames

Funny moments from the Podcast/{{Rifftrax}} of video games and ''ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}}'' comic strips.
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[[foldercontrol]]

[[folder: ''Gears of War 3'']]
* On the COG armor:
-->'''Mike:''' Those chestplates indicate the ''actual'' size of their nipples. [[{{Squick}} Yeah, the future is gross.]]
* When Cole Train enters his old locker room.
-->'''Bill:''' ''(as Cole)'' My old locker room! ''(sighs dreamily)'' Saw a lot of nude men in here, yep.
-->'''Mike:''' [[MundaneMadeAwesome THRILL as a grown man grows nostalgic!]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder: ''Mega Man 8'']]
* Mega Man: Dr. Light, how's it going? Will he be okay?
-->'''Mike''': Today's episode: "Mega Man hits a Wino With His Car"!
* This exchange:
-->'''Mega Man''': But where ''is'' Dr. Wiley?
-->'''Dr. Light''': That's a good question.
-->'''Kevin''': Another good question: Why is Mega ''Man'' [[CrossdressingVoices voiced by a grade-school girl]]?
[[/folder]]

[[folder: ''Final Fantasy X'']]
* When Yuna tries getting Tidus to laugh out loud:
-->'''Yuna:''' Come on, show me!
-->'''Bill (as Yuna):''' Shouldn't be hard! Just look down at what you're wearing.
*
-->'''Yuna:''' You probably shouldn't laugh anymore.
-->'''Mike (as Yuna):''' And while you're at it, maybe cut out breathing and all other life functions as well?
[[/folder]]

[[folder: ''Sonic The Hedgehog 2006'']]
* "He died from having a really stupid nose."
* Before Elise kisses Sonic to bring him back to life.
-->'''Elise:''' Sonic, come back. To me... to us!
-->'''Mike (as Elise):''' Disgrace your once-proud franchise with one more terrible game before you die.
* When Elise kisses Sonic:
-->'''Kevin:''' And God smote them for their unholy woman-hedgehog sexy time.
* "Braaaaaaaaaains..."
[[/folder]]

[[folder: ''Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots'']]
* After Akiba [[ToiletHumor gets caught relieving himself]] in a barrel, Snake proceeds to inspect it.
-->'''Bill:''' Nick Nolte's real estate agent checks out an exciting new prospect.
-->'''Mike!Old Snake:''' [[IncrediblyLamePun ...Getting too old for this shit...]] (Laughs) I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. But seriously, I just put my whole head into some weapons-grade fecal stink and should be hospitalized immediately.
[[/folder]]

[[folder: The Complete Peanuts 1995-1996]]
*
-->'''Lucy:''' I've often wondered...
-->'''Riff:''' "Am I my brother in a black wig?"
-->'''Lucy:''' In all your life, what have you done that you're most proud of?
-->'''Riff:''' "I'm a DOG who WRITES NOVELS, what more do you want from me?!"
-->'''Snoopy:''' In all my life, I've never kissed a cat!
-->'''Riff:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial Snoopy was always going out of his way to claim that, for some reason.]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder: ''National Geographic'' Total Riff Off]]

[[AC: Killer Shrimp N' Friends]]

* During the segment about Marley, the untrainable, thong-swallowing dog.
-->'''Mom:''' My daughter called to me saying, "Mom! Mom! Something's wrong with Marley!"
-->'''Mike:''' She's behaving!
* The crew react at the horrifying habits of koalas.
-->'''Bill:''' So they're a ball of diarrhea, wrapped in chlamydia? Still no different than David Spade.
* During the first segment about the mantis shrimp:
-->"The mantis shrimp is the little JoePesci of the animal kingdom."
-->'''Mike:''' He carries [[Film/GoodFellas a shine box]].

[[AC: Demon Bat]]

* The whole setup even without the riffing as Richard Terry tries to come off as some kind of action hero on a grandiose adventure gives the riffers plenty of material to work with.
* When announced that a mysterious bat-like creature was terrorizing a Central American village.
-->'''Kevin:''' That's just [[Film/TheDarkKnight Christian Bale]] getting in character.
*
-->'''Richard Terry:''' He described the bat as big as a vulture and having huge black beady eyes.
-->'''Kevin:''' It sounds like he was describing Gary Busey.
*
-->'''Bill:''' The only flying demon was the huge loogy he hocked up!
* The RunningGag of Richard Terry overhyping creatures.
-->'''Bill:''' Birds, or as I call them, ''Mayan Beak Demons''!
-->'''Kevin:''' ''(on a snake)'' A wingless monster bat!
*
-->'''Richard Terry:''' I'm trying to find something frightening with large eyes that would frighten the local populace.
-->'''Kevin:''' You know, something that would cause [[Franchise/{{Batman}} a billionaire orphan to wear tights and fight crime.]]
*
-->'''Mike:''' I was just decapitated by a huge demon bat! Oh, wait, I just hit my head on the bathroom stall door.
* After Richard Terry describes his sweat combining with bat guano to form "a lovely, thick guano soup".
-->'''Mike:''' Okay, ''now'' the program has become ''truly'' scary.
*
-->'''Richard Terry:''' I wanted to learn more about vampire bats.
-->'''Mike:''' So I read a book called ''Literature/{{Twilight}}''.
* On a shock-cut to a close-up of a grinning bat:
-->'''Mike:''' ''(as bat)'' Hi. Now I'm in your dreams forever!
** Earlier there's another shock-cut bit:
-->'''Richard Terry:''' They believe that there are good bats that protect the village and demon bats that attack them.
-->''(shock-cut to a grinning bat)''
-->'''Kevin:''' ''(high-pitched voice)'' I'm the ''good'' bat!
* Near the end of the show, we're introduced to "one of the world's foremost experts on vampire bats."
-->'''Kevin:''' Whom they ''really'' should have hired in the first place instead of Our Host.
* Translating what a local is really telling Terry: "Do... something else... with... your life."
* Noting the oddity of Richard's quest:
-->'''Richard:''' I'm searching the cave's of Mexico for a monster bat...
-->'''Bill:''' ''(deadpan)'' As one does.

[[AC: Guy and a Goose]]

* On an old man's relationship with a goose named Maria:
-->'''Kevin:''' Even Joaquin Phoenix's character in ''Film/{{Her}}'' thinks this relationship is kinda pathetic.
* On finding out Maria is actually ''Mario''.
-->'''Kevin:''' The goose's hatred of [[Franchise/SuperMarioBros Koopas]] should have been a clue.
* The entire RunningGag of the legend that is PAUL!
* On a cocker spaniel named Bullwinkle that specializes in finding cadavers.
-->'''Bill:''' Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a cadaver out of my hat!
*
-->'''Dog Trainer:''' ''(holding human foot)'' I'm gonna bury it. I'm gonna put it in some rubble...
-->'''Mike:''' That's what Fred Flintstone said during his affair with Betty.
* Several riffs on the fact that they have actual human remains on hand to test the dog with:
-->'''Bill:''' "I notice that they're still not addressing the question where these remains are coming from."
** When they first announce that they'll be using human remains, Bill gives a startled ''[[FlatWhat "Huh?"]]''
* Slow-motion close-up of a barking Malinois:
--> '''Kevin:''' I'm from Hell!

[[AC: Man V. Monster]]

*
-->'''Richard Terry:''' It's just... thick brown soup down there.
-->'''Mike:''' Welcome to "Some Guy Says Vaguely Gross Phrases"!
* As Richard talks ominously about his search.
-->'''Kevin:''' AAAH, A MONSTER!!! Oh, wait, that's just a small weed.
*
-->'''Kevin:''' ''Man V. Common Species'' just doesn't have the same ring to it.
* "Richard Terrry summed up in five seconds:"
-->'''Richard:''' "There's something black floating past us!" (horror sting, dramatic zoom) "That's a log."
* While Richard is fishing for catfish:
-->'''Kevin:''' "Only Richard Terry would talk about being in the 'firing line' of a ''catfish.''"
* They laugh at how it apparently took an old Thai woman ''weeks'' to realize that her food had become necrotic.
-->'''Bill:''' "Tough old bird!"

[[AC: Animals Behaving Badly]]

* A snake suddenly lands on a car hood while it's driving down a highway.
-->'''Narrator:''' Sometimes they find themselves starring in an unofficial sequel to ''Film/SnakesOnAPlane.''
-->'''Bill:''' But with much higher production values.
* On raccoons.
-->'''Narrator:''' They don't make good pets.
-->'''Bill:''' But they ''do'' make Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy, however.
* As a turtle ''humps'' a workman's boot.
-->'''Mike:''' ''(as turtle)'' Yeah, call me Dr. Scholl, baby!
* After numerous disgusting and disturbing clips, we cut to an obviously heavily pregnant elephant:
-->'''Mike:''' [[ThisIsGoingToSuck "Oh, Nat Geo, whatever you're thinking, I beg you to reconsider!"]]
[[/folder]]

[[folder: San Francisco SketchFest]]
* ''The Trouble With Women:''
** Bill impersonating Brad and ending the short with, "Fine, I'll just go invent [=GamerGate=]!"
* ''Dining Together''
** Before the short begins, [[Series/MythBusters Adam Savage]] talks about the papier mache turkey he made for Thanksgiving as a kid. When he presented it to the family, he made [[Film/{{Alien}} the alien]] burst from its chest.
* ''David and Hazel: Part 1''
** The RunningGag of David's ham-fisted line, "What do you think we are, millionaires?!"
* ''One Got Fat''
** Kevin cursing out an audience member for spoiling the fact that [[WesternAnimation/TheAdventuresOfRockyAndBullwinkle Edward Everett Horton]] is the short's narrator.
** Bill stating that the one thing to take out of the whole night is adding the phrase, "Monkey dismemberment boner," to your lexicon.
* ''David and Hazel: Part 2''
** Janet Varney's RunningGag of Hazel needing 35 minutes to order a sandwich. She continues to name ingredients even after the short ends!
* ''Improving Your Pronunciation''
** Mike's joke of the skinny black teen looking like [[Series/FamilyMatters Steve Urkel]].
** The RunningGag of Bob being the ButtMonkey of the group of teens.
** Everyone going nuts when Ned Blanford reveals he used a tape recorder to prove the girl pronounced nuclear as "nucular."
* ''Batman: Robin's Wild Ride''
** During some technical difficulties, the riffers have a bit of fun:
*** The comment that the dead footage is still faster than ''David and Hazel''.
*** Mike telling the audience that there are keys to a new car under someone's seat and Kevin declaring they're really his and he lost them.
*** Kevin's describing what the audience is missing on his mini screen and CrossesTheLineTwice by talking about how obscene the short is getting.
[[/folder]]
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-->'''Someone as Yuna:''' And while you're at it, maybe cut out breathing and all other life functions as well?

-->'''Riff:''' Snoopy was always going out of his way to claim that, for some reason.

[[folder: Sonic The Hedgehog 2006]]

Funny moments from the Podcast/{{Rifftrax}} of video games.

* Before Elise, kisses Sonic to bring him back to life.

-->'''Mike''': Today's episode: "Mega Man hits a [[IncrediblyLamePun Whineo]] With His Car"!

[[folder: [Sonic The Hedgehog 2006]]

[[Sonic The Hedgehog 2006]]

[/folder]]

-->'''Bill:''' It shouldn't be hard; just look down at what you're wearing!