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Changed line(s) 570 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Cam:''' (Reassuring them) Most of our friends are white. *Cue black couple walking past and glaring at Cam*
to:
-->'''Cam:''' (Reassuring them) Most of our friends are white. *Cue black couple walking past and glaring at Cam*Cam* Okay, could everyone just calm down and return to their own conversations please?!
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Changed line(s) 32 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Cam:''' ''[shrieking]'' '''''I SWEAR TO GOD, I'M GOOD NNA BREAK IT!'''''
to:
-->'''Cam:''' ''[shrieking]'' '''''I SWEAR TO GOD, I'M GOOD NNA GONNA BREAK IT!'''''
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--> ''Haley looks into camera''
* Phil and Frank test the latter’s car jack invention.
-->'''Phil:''' Why is it still going?
-->'''Frank:''' How hard did you press start?
-->'''Phil:''' Well, that shouldn't matter!
-->'''Frank:''' Well, just press "end task.”
-->'''Phil:''' Okay.
-->'''Frank:''' But only on the right side of the button.
-->'''Phil:''' Why wouldn't you tell me that first?! Sweet maker! ''(The car flips over)''
-->'''Frank:''' Hmm. Everybody warned me this would happen.
* Phil and Frank test the latter’s car jack invention.
-->'''Phil:''' Why is it still going?
-->'''Frank:''' How hard did you press start?
-->'''Phil:''' Well, that shouldn't matter!
-->'''Frank:''' Well, just press "end task.”
-->'''Phil:''' Okay.
-->'''Frank:''' But only on the right side of the button.
-->'''Phil:''' Why wouldn't you tell me that first?! Sweet maker! ''(The car flips over)''
-->'''Frank:''' Hmm. Everybody warned me this would happen.
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* Gloria tricks Claire into doing her housework for her.
* This:
-->'''Haley:''' So, what’s up with you and Cam? I’m sensing tension.
-->'''Haley (interview):''' I didn’t sense any tension. I was just looking for some drama and figured it was a safe bet.
-->'''Mitchell:''' There is tension!
* This:
-->'''Haley:''' So, what’s up with you and Cam? I’m sensing tension.
-->'''Haley (interview):''' I didn’t sense any tension. I was just looking for some drama and figured it was a safe bet.
-->'''Mitchell:''' There is tension!
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** Phil trying to assure Claire that nothing is bad as it looks after they were caught by their kids. All while struggling to put their clothes back on:
--> '''Claire:''' ''(putting pants on)'' Oh my god, oh my god!
--> '''Phil:''' It's ok. [[BlatantLies Maybe they didn't see anything.]]
--> '''Claire:''' Sweetie, they ''screamed'', they dropped a tray of dishes, and then they ran out of here like they were on fire!
** Alex, trying to BrainBleach the image from her mind by rubbing water on her eyes before shouting "I can still see it."
--> '''Claire:''' ''(putting pants on)'' Oh my god, oh my god!
--> '''Phil:''' It's ok. [[BlatantLies Maybe they didn't see anything.]]
--> '''Claire:''' Sweetie, they ''screamed'', they dropped a tray of dishes, and then they ran out of here like they were on fire!
** Alex, trying to BrainBleach the image from her mind by rubbing water on her eyes before shouting "I can still see it."
Changed line(s) 130 (click to see context) from:
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex he know what sex is.
to:
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex he know knows what sex is.
Deleted line(s) 133,138 (click to see context) :
** Phil trying to assure Claire that nothing is bad as it looks after they were caught by their kids. All while struggling to put their clothes back on:
--> '''Claire:''' ''(putting pants on)'' Oh my god, oh my god!
--> '''Phil:''' It's ok. [[BlatantLies Maybe they didn't see anything.]]
--> '''Claire:''' Sweetie, they ''screamed'', they dropped a tray of dishes, and then they ran out of here like they were on fire!
** Alex, trying to BrainBleach the image from her mind by rubbing water on her eyes before shouting "I can still see it."
Changed line(s) 145 (click to see context) from:
to:
-->'''Luke:''' It's hard for me to look Dad afterwards.
When they realize that the parents are going to want to talk about what happened, they have to figure out to handle it, with Haley suggesting that they just smile and think of something else. Luke thinks its a good idea, as it's just like with school, to which Haley gives a very approving "yeah", seemingly proud that he is following her footsteps in zoning out at school.
-->'''Luke:''
-->
When they realize that the parents are going to want to talk about what happened, they have to figure out to handle it, with Haley suggesting that they just smile and think of something else. Luke thinks its a good idea, as it's just like with school, to which Haley gives a very approving "yeah", seemingly proud that he is following her footsteps in zoning out at school.
-->'''Luke:''
-->
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* Haley has to deal with April, Rainer’s teenage daughter. Claire clearly enjoys watching her struggle.
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* Phil poses as a transfer student Rod Skyhook to energise Luke’s party. He sports some sick dance moves.
* Claire figures out the best way to get kids to leave a party. Be a mom.
* Claire figures out the best way to get kids to leave a party. Be a mom.
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* When Haley and Rainer start seeing each other, Phil is confused.
--> '''Phil:''' When did you two set up this little rendezvous? While I was killing it on the air?
--> '''Haley:''' He called me today.
--> '''Phil:''' How’d he get your number?
--> '''Haley:''' He said you gave it to him.
--> '''Phil:''' That lying sa— [[OhCrap uh-oh!]]
** Cut to Flashback of Phil inadvertently inviting Rainer to date Haley.
--> '''Phil:''' When did you two set up this little rendezvous? While I was killing it on the air?
--> '''Haley:''' He called me today.
--> '''Phil:''' How’d he get your number?
--> '''Haley:''' He said you gave it to him.
--> '''Phil:''' That lying sa— [[OhCrap uh-oh!]]
** Cut to Flashback of Phil inadvertently inviting Rainer to date Haley.
Changed line(s) 1172 (click to see context) from:
--> '''Phil:''' Just a little colour to make my eyes pop. ''(Claire and Haley stare wide-eyed at him)'' Like yours are now.
to:
--> '''Phil:''' Just a little colour to make my eyes pop. ''(Claire and Haley stare wide-eyed at him)'' Like Like… yours are now.
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* Haley does Phil’s makeup again.
--> '''Haley:''' It’s really great they’re having you back on the news.
--> '''Phil:''' No, no. I’m getting a new drivers license photo.
--> ''Haley stares at the camera, bewildered.''
--> '''Haley:''' It’s really great they’re having you back on the news.
--> '''Phil:''' No, no. I’m getting a new drivers license photo.
--> ''Haley stares at the camera, bewildered.''
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Changed line(s) 1096 (click to see context) from:
* Jay creates a video for Manny to submit to Julliard, depicting his life as poverty-stricken and war-torn in order to gain the sympathy vote.
to:
* Jay creates a video for Manny to submit to Julliard, Juilliard, depicting his life as poverty-stricken and war-torn in order to gain the sympathy vote. vote.
* Manny and Luke both run for Class President.
--> '''Luke:''' I won!
--> '''Manny:''' It was the lowest voter turnout in school history. They hated the both of us.
--> '''Luke:''' [[DamnedByFaintPraise But you more.]]
* Manny and Luke both run for Class President.
--> '''Luke:''' I won!
--> '''Manny:''' It was the lowest voter turnout in school history. They hated the both of us.
--> '''Luke:''' [[DamnedByFaintPraise But you more.]]
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* Phil is being interviewed on the news and applies some makeup at home.
--> '''Claire:''' What did you do to your face?
--> '''Phil:''' Just a little colour to make my eyes pop. ''(Claire and Haley stare wide-eyed at him)'' Like yours are now.
** When he does appear on the news, he tries to stare directly down the barrel of the camera, but the camera keeps showing the other shot.
--> '''Claire:''' What did you do to your face?
--> '''Phil:''' Just a little colour to make my eyes pop. ''(Claire and Haley stare wide-eyed at him)'' Like yours are now.
** When he does appear on the news, he tries to stare directly down the barrel of the camera, but the camera keeps showing the other shot.
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** Later, Jay introduces himself.
--> '''Shaun:''' I'm Shawn, by the way.
--> '''Jay:''' Jay Pritchett.
--> '''Gloria:''' Jay.
--> '''Jay:''' It's okay, Gloria. All handled. This is my wife, Gloria. This is Shawn -- and I want to get this right, beautiful African name -- Shawn M'badawe.
--> '''Shaun:''' I said, "By the way."
--> '''Jay:''' Ah.
--> '''Shaun:''' I'm Shawn, by the way.
--> '''Jay:''' Jay Pritchett.
--> '''Gloria:''' Jay.
--> '''Jay:''' It's okay, Gloria. All handled. This is my wife, Gloria. This is Shawn -- and I want to get this right, beautiful African name -- Shawn M'badawe.
--> '''Shaun:''' I said, "By the way."
--> '''Jay:''' Ah.
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* Jay is having security cameras installed, at the exact time that a black family is moving in across the street. He’s worried that he’ll appear racist.
--> '''Gloria:''' Why would the neighbours just assume that you’re a racist?
--> '''Jay:''' Gloria, Gloria, Gloria. You’ll never understand the stereotypes old white men face.
--> '''Gloria:''' Why would the neighbours just assume that you’re a racist?
--> '''Jay:''' Gloria, Gloria, Gloria. You’ll never understand the stereotypes old white men face.
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Changed line(s) 1144 (click to see context) from:
--> '''Gloria:''' Claire?
to:
--> '''Gloria:''' Claire?[[DramaQueen Claire?]]
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* Manny has an idea to help drum up attention for Gloria’s nacho stand:
--> '''Manny:''' I can see if Phil has that thing in his car that flairs around like this. ''(Moves his hands up and down)''
--> '''Gloria:''' Claire?
--> '''Manny:''' No, his Tube Dude.
* Mitch and Cam memorise speeches to empower women and use it on Haley and Sal.
--> '''Mitch and Cam:''' We’re saying that you settle.
--> '''Sal:''' You practise this at home, don’t you?
--> '''Mitch and Cam:''' We do not.
* This moment:
--> '''Gloria:''' Jay?! Jay?!
--> '''Jay:''' I’m up here.
--> '''Gloria:''' ''(Looks up to the sky)'' Ay, Dios mío! Your time was too short!
--> '''Jay:''' I’m on the roof.
--> '''Gloria:''' Ah.
--> '''Manny:''' I can see if Phil has that thing in his car that flairs around like this. ''(Moves his hands up and down)''
--> '''Gloria:''' Claire?
--> '''Manny:''' No, his Tube Dude.
* Mitch and Cam memorise speeches to empower women and use it on Haley and Sal.
--> '''Mitch and Cam:''' We’re saying that you settle.
--> '''Sal:''' You practise this at home, don’t you?
--> '''Mitch and Cam:''' We do not.
* This moment:
--> '''Gloria:''' Jay?! Jay?!
--> '''Jay:''' I’m up here.
--> '''Gloria:''' ''(Looks up to the sky)'' Ay, Dios mío! Your time was too short!
--> '''Jay:''' I’m on the roof.
--> '''Gloria:''' Ah.
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* Haley and Alex force Phil to watch videos of Luke, in order to cry now, instead of at his graduation.
--> '''Phil:''' Luke’s first haircut. [[BaitAndSwitch He gave me bangs.]]
** Then, at Luke’s graduation, Phil cried so much at home that he can’t produce any tears. It results in a deadpan “Well done, son.”
--> '''Phil:''' Luke’s first haircut. [[BaitAndSwitch He gave me bangs.]]
** Then, at Luke’s graduation, Phil cried so much at home that he can’t produce any tears. It results in a deadpan “Well done, son.”
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Changed line(s) 203 (click to see context) from:
* Jay argues with a neighbor whose dog keeps crapping in his yard. The guy says he never complained about Jay's parrot. Cue a montage showing Gloria shouting "Jay!". The scene ends with Gloria shouting Jay's name again, this time setting off a car alarm.
to:
* Jay Gloria argues with a neighbor whose dog keeps crapping in his yard.them awake. The guy says he never complained about Jay's parrot. Cue a montage showing Gloria shouting "Jay!". The scene ends with Gloria shouting Jay's name again, this time setting off a car alarm.
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spelling/grammar fix(es)
Changed line(s) 669 (click to see context) from:
** Also from the episode Gloria gets jealous when her visiting mother and Claire spend the day getting along baking. She gets in an argument with Claire and her mother tries to top it. "Girls, girls I don't have a favorite." Gloria screams; "WHY THE HELL NOT?!"
to:
** Also from the episode Gloria gets jealous when her visiting mother and Claire spend the day getting along baking. She gets in an argument with Claire and her mother tries to top stop it. "Girls, girls I don't have a favorite." Gloria screams; "WHY THE HELL NOT?!"
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** Speaking of the model airplane, Joe causing Haley and Alex's hair to get caught in the propeller.
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** Alex, trying to BrainBleach the image from her mind by rubbing water on her eyes before shouting "I can still see it."
-->'''Luke:'''Did you guys notice that Dad had the same look on his face whenever he gets into a new car?
-->'''Luke:'''Did you guys notice that Dad had the same look on his face whenever he gets into a new car?
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Afterwards, the kids decide to give Phil and Claire a different anniversary gift….a lock to place on their bedroom door. Only problem is that it makes a noise that reverbs, which now becomes a trigger for the kids.
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Changed line(s) 240,252 (click to see context) from:
'''Mitch:''' We dropped by their place last week. ''[[DramaticDrop (glass shatters)]]''\\
''Flashback''\\
'''Haley''' You win the award for worst mother ever!\\
'''Claire:''' I will be sure to thank you in my speech! Phil! The frying pan’s on fire!\\
'''Phil:''' Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!\\
'''Luke:''' Dad, I’m gonna teach myself how to juggle.\\''[[FunnyBackgroundEvent (Luke grabs a bunch of knives)]]''\\
'''Phil:''' Good for you, buddy.\\
'''Alex:''' Mom! Did no one hear me screaming?! I’ve been trapped in the garage for like 20 minutes!\\
'''Claire:''' And yet still you didn’t get the rat traps I asked for! Thank you! ''(sees the frying pan on fire again)'' Honey! It’s doing it again!\\
'''Phil:''' Come on now! Every morning?!\\
'''Haley''' I hope the whole house burns down!\\
'''Mitch''' Did we come at a bad time?\\
'''Claire:''' Come back in 7 years and 5 months, when THEY’RE ALL GONE!!!
''Flashback''\\
'''Haley''' You win the award for worst mother ever!\\
'''Claire:''' I will be sure to thank you in my speech! Phil! The frying pan’s on fire!\\
'''Phil:''' Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay calm!\\
'''Luke:''' Dad, I’m gonna teach myself how to juggle.\\''[[FunnyBackgroundEvent (Luke grabs a bunch of knives)]]''\\
'''Phil:''' Good for you, buddy.\\
'''Alex:''' Mom! Did no one hear me screaming?! I’ve been trapped in the garage for like 20 minutes!\\
'''Claire:''' And yet still you didn’t get the rat traps I asked for! Thank you! ''(sees the frying pan on fire again)'' Honey! It’s doing it again!\\
'''Phil:''' Come on now! Every morning?!\\
'''Haley''' I hope the whole house burns down!\\
'''Mitch''' Did we come at a bad time?\\
'''Claire:''' Come back in 7 years and 5 months, when THEY’RE ALL GONE!!!
to:
'''Haley'''
-->'''Haley''' You win the award for worst mother
'''Claire:'''
-->'''Claire:''' I will be sure to thank you in my speech! Phil! The frying pan’s on
'''Phil:'''
-->'''Phil:''' Son of Jor-El! Everybody stay
'''Luke:'''
-->'''Luke:''' Dad, I’m gonna teach myself how to
'''Phil:'''
-->'''Phil:''' Good for you,
'''Alex:'''
-->'''Alex:''' Mom! Did no one hear me screaming?! I’ve been trapped in the garage for like 20
'''Claire:'''
-->'''Claire:''' And yet still you didn’t get the rat traps I asked for! Thank you! ''(sees the frying pan on fire again)'' Honey! It’s doing it
'''Phil:'''
-->'''Phil:''' Come on now! Every
'''Haley'''
-->'''Haley''' I hope the whole house burns
'''Mitch'''
-->'''Mitch''' Did we come at a bad
'''Claire:'''
-->'''Claire:''' Come back in 7 years and 5 months, when THEY’RE ALL GONE!!!
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-->'''Haley:''' Uh, I-I don't think that's what she meant... is it?
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Changed line(s) 821 (click to see context) from:
%%** Haley Bailey
to:
Changed line(s) 826,828 (click to see context) from:
* KAY!!!!
** Haley's breakdown in the car in the tag scene.
--> '''Haley ''': Who says Kay?! You're so stupid!!
** Haley's breakdown in the car in the tag scene.
--> '''Haley ''': Who says Kay?! You're so stupid!!
to:
* KAY!!!!
When turned down for an interview she had scheduled because the designer is "in a mood", Haley lets out an overly-cheerful "KAY!!!!", spins around, and leaves.
** Haley's breakdown in the car in the tag scene. \n Quickly becomes a SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome when she ''refuses'' to be turned down.
--> '''Haley ''': 'Kay??' Who saysKay?! 'Kay'?! You're so stupid!!stupid!! ''(lets out a CatharticScream)'' ''(a car behind her honks)'' Go around! I'm not going anywhere... ''(crying)'' [[{{NEET}} I'm not going anywhere]]! ''(with dawning realization)'' I'm not going anywhere. ''(furiously gathering her things)'' I'm not ''going'' anywhere, Mr. Gavin Sinclair! You're gonna see me, I'm gonna show you. [[MeaningfulEcho I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!]]
** Haley's breakdown in the car in the tag scene.
--> '''Haley ''': 'Kay??' Who says
Changed line(s) 1003 (click to see context) from:
* Jay and Manny engaging in a hysterical talk on how "double-clicking" is not the same as "clicking twice."
to:
* Jay and Manny engaging in a hysterical talk on how fight about the difference between "double-clicking" is not the same as and "clicking twice." "
** The smash-cut to Manny's confessional is what seals it:
--->'''Manny:''' ''(laying on the couch [[FreudianCouch as though speaking to a psychoanalyst]])'' ...That's the first time I've ever used the F-word.
** The smash-cut to Manny's confessional is what seals it:
--->'''Manny:''' ''(laying on the couch [[FreudianCouch as though speaking to a psychoanalyst]])'' ...That's the first time I've ever used the F-word.
Changed line(s) 1009 (click to see context) from:
* "And now we're down to 3 phones."
to:
* "And During their impromptu visit to New York, the Dunphys ask a passerby to take their picture... only for them to walk away with it. Alex remarks, "[[CrossesTheLineTwice And now we're down to 3 phones.phones]]."
Changed line(s) 1055 (click to see context) from:
* [[ThatCameOutWrong Just drop it!!]]
to:
* [[ThatCameOutWrong Mitch and Cam's extremely poorly-timed argument at Cam's grandmother's funeral. "[[ThatCameOutWrong Just drop it!!]]it!!]]"
Changed line(s) 1058 (click to see context) from:
--> '''Mitch:''' "It was hard for us to hear, but in the spirit of tolerance, we accepted the fact that our nine-year-old daughter might not want to fall asleep under the watchful eyes of her half-naked fathers
to:
--> '''Mitch:''' "It was hard for us to hear, but in the spirit of tolerance, we accepted the fact that our nine-year-old daughter might not want to fall asleep under the watchful eyes of her half-naked fathersfathers.
Changed line(s) 1063 (click to see context) from:
* The original 60's Batman theme song playing every time Cam, dressed as Batman, chases after the kid on Halloween.
to:
* The original 60's Batman theme song playing every time Cam, dressed as Batman, chases after the prankster kid on Halloween.
Changed line(s) 1065 (click to see context) from:
* Phil getting stuck in the sauna, and eventually slides down the glass and passes out.
to:
* Phil getting stuck in the sauna, and eventually slides sliding down the glass and passes passing out.
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Changed line(s) 292 (click to see context) from:
* Phil's StupidStatementDanceMix about how much he loves sleeping with his wife. "Some sick bastard autotuned me."
to:
* Phil's StupidStatementDanceMix VoiceClipSong remix about how much he loves sleeping with his wife. "Some sick bastard autotuned me."
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Changed line(s) 128,130 (click to see context) from:
--> '''Luke:''' Whatever they were doing, I think Dad was winning.
--> ''(Haley looks horrified)''
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex what sex is.
--> ''(Haley looks horrified)''
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex what sex is.
to:
--> '''Luke:''' Whatever they were doing, I think it looked like Dad was winning.
-->''(Haley ''(Alex looks horrified)''
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex he know what sex is.
-->
** Easily forgotten is Luke telling Alex he know what sex is.
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Changed line(s) 1385 (click to see context) from:
-->'''Manny''': Each cramp, each migraine should remind you--\\'''Lily''': Get the [[SoundEffectBleep (bleep)]] out of here Manny!!!
to:
-->'''Manny''': Each cramp, each migraine should remind you--\\'''Lily''': you--
-->'''Lily''': Get the [[SoundEffectBleep (bleep)]] out of here Manny!!!
-->'''Lily''': Get the [[SoundEffectBleep (bleep)]] out of here Manny!!!
