History Funny / Defunctland

** As the episode is about a TunnelOfLove-style dark ride- a Tunnel of Love with a notable reputation for couples getting on the ride to engage in naughty business, no less- you can probably guess what Kevin devotes a not-insignificant portion of this episode to, including the jokes:

'''Kevin:''' Wow, this is an old website. Just look at that graphic [[note]] The graphic reads "Affordable Disney Vacation Packages" [[/note]] in the corner!

** The winner of the seventh season of ''American Idol'', Ryan Cook, filmed a Disney World commercial where he sung "When You Wish Upon a Star". Whether to avoid copyright claims, for the sake of comedy, or both, the clip of him singing abruptly cuts off after the word "wish".

** The theme park attraction had the option for contestants to film video introductions of themselves that showcased something compelling about them, similarly to vignettes used on the show proper. Kevin proceeds to create some MoodWhiplash by pairing an attraction video where a contestant begins explains what brought him to American Idol by saying "First, we were here on vacation" with a show video where a contestant talks about having been homeless.

** Kevin compares the American Idol Experience to the ''Monsters Inc. Laugh Floor'' attraction, as both rely heavily on performers interacting with and commenting on guests... and shows disapproval towards the monsters on the Laugh Floor because unlike ''American Idol'''s Simon Cowell archetype, they barely make fun of people.

** Kevin shows the attraction's web page, which had an interactive game called "Judge This!". Kevin provides a demonstration of the game, which features some [[HollywoodToneDeaf hilariously off-key singing]] and some reactions from Kevin:
--->'''Kevin:''' Wow, this is an old website. Just look at that graphic [[note]] The graphic reads "Affordable Disney Vacation Packages" [[/note]] in the corner!

** Kevin spends some time talking about the youth-oriented spinoff of ''American Idol'', called ''American Juniors'', including how they "made the mistake" of forming a tween music supergroup instead of a single star. Then he mentions that the only member of the band the show formed [[BrickJoke who has their own Wikipedia page]] is Creator/LucyHale, which results in him giving the group's relevancy an F.

** Kevin compares the American Idol Experience to the ''Monsters Inc. Laugh Floor'' attraction, as both rely heavily on performers interacting with and commenting on guests... and shows disapproval towards the monsters on the Laugh Floor because unlike ''American Idol'''s Ryan Seacrest impersonator, they barely make fun of people.
--->'''Kevin:''' Completely toothless. Cowardly, even. To look out on a crowd of sweaty, entitled Walt Disney World tourists and pull punches like that.

** A RunningGag where previous ''Idol'' winners were given their advice for contestants at the attraction, with each of them saying "Have fun" or some variant thereof. Much like with the "Toot Toot" gag in the Wiggles episode, these clips gradually get shorter as the episode continues.

** One issue brough up with the movie studio tram tour being incorporated into an active movie studio is that the New York set was placed too close to a pyrotechnics demonstration for the tram tour, which would regularly go off and make too much noise for the set to be useful for filming during park operating hours. This led to a hit in the popularity of the tram tour, as there was a lack of active productions to see... [[Catch22Dilemma because of the tram tour]].
** Kevin claims that the stage show adaptation of ''WesternAnimation/{{Doug}}'' [["BlatantLies translated perfectly to stage, with no issues at all."]] As he says this, the video zooms in on the actor portraying Porkchop, who's wearing a dog suit with some rather unsettling face paint to capture the look of Doug's pet.

* "The American Idol Theme Park Experience":

** In the intro, Kevin states that pop stars in the late 90s "had reached unprecedented levels of notoriety and denim". He then lists changes in technology, "such as portable devices, the internet, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking denim]]".

-->'''Kevin:''' Wikipedia is not always correct when it comes to facts, but the Wikipedia Music Group Relevancy Test does not lie.

-->'''Kevin:''' Wow, this is an old website. Just look at that graphic [[note]] The graphic reads "Affordable Disney Vacation Packages" [[/note]] in the corner!

** Kevin says that "The only surefire way to become absurdly famous at the turn of the millennium was to [[Music/BritneySpears have]] [[Music/ChristinaAguilera starred]] [[Music/JustinTimberlake in]] the 1989 revival of ''Series/TheMickeyMouseClub''.

** Kevin's test for how successful a BoyBand or GirlGroup is: determine how many members have UsefulNotes/{{Wikipedia}} articles, and whether or not these articles have photos.

** The "Red Room" where attendees could practice their song for the live show was also known as "the Coke room", which Kevin notes is either [[ProductPlacement a reference to the show's Coca-Cola sponsorship,]] or "a way to ''really'' [[ItsSnowingCocaine prepare these contestants for Hollywood.]]"

** The "Red Room" where attendees could practice their song for the live show was also known as "the Coke room", which Kevin notes is either [[ProductPlacement a reference to the shows Coca-Cola sponsorship,]] or "a way to ''really'' [[ItsSnowingCocaine prepare these contestants for Hollywood.]]"

** An anecdote from a Dream Ticket winner includes the winner saying that getting the ticket was the best day of her life. Kevin comment that this hyperbolic statement was fine, as the winner was only fourteen at the time.

** Kevin admits that it's a shame that the Big Red Car Ride wasn't given a proper send-off, as "the Wiggles have four different songs about saying goodbye."

** Only Kevin can make a link between a NAFTA debate, ''Monday Night Football', and ''Film/HighSchoolMusical2'' as intricate yet hilarious as this:

** Only Kevin can make a link between a NAFTA debate, ''Series/MondayNightFootball'', and ''Film/HighSchoolMusical2'' as intricate yet hilarious as this:

** John Longhurst took his children to an animal park. The monkeys urinated in front of the guests, sickening one of the children with the stench. Longhurst decided to buy them milkshakes to take their minds off it, [[FromBadToWorse only to find the server scratching herself the entire time]]. Longhurst's epiphany, as he packed it in and went, was simply "Someone's got to do something about this". This inspired him to found Dreamworld--when he was having considerable trouble finding a location for the park, he straight-up ''asked God'' where he would find the land, and God supposedly answered "Ten miles out, on the gold coast".

** Adlai Stevenson had a vested interest in the fair due to Disney's Lincoln exhibit. Thus, he responded to civil rights groups planning a stall-in protest at the fair by claiming Lincoln would be ashamed by their actions, as he had a "vigorous insistence on obedience to the law".

*** There's a part of the ride where Greg has the riders sing "Wave to Wags" to get Wags the Dog to slide down his slide. ''As slowly and mechanically as possible''. Kevin [[SuddenSoundtrackStop cuts the background music]] to further emphasize how slowly Wags slides down. Cue an abrupt transition to the next show scene.

* "[[https://youtu.be/SFE8RlKlLCE The Failure of Euro Disneyland]]"

--->'''American Adventure:''' $500,000 under budget! (10 weeks behind schedule)
--->'''Japan:''' Right on budget! (8 weeks behind schedule)
--->'''The Land:''' Growing has begun! [[FromBadToWorse (8 weeks behind schedule) ($3 million over budget)]]
--->'''Germany:''' Right on schedule! ([[WhatCouldHaveBeen boat ride delayed indefinitely]])
--->'''Mexico:''' [[HopeSpot Boat ride will open with park!]] ([[RunningGag 10 weeks behind schedule]])

--->The Wiggles empire was an intoxicating gravy train. [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative The kind that only comes from singing about potatoes, and dancing with a giant octopus.]] ''And it was a machine that could not be stopped''.
--->''(on the departure of three founding members)'' Apparently nothing makes one face their own mortality more than being a Wiggle.

** Kevin goes over the impetus for what would one day become the [=MagicBand=] and describes how, since the original designer basically came up with a ''Magic'' wrist''Band'', it was obviously destined to be known the world over as the [[NonIndicativeName Experience Band]]. Or [=xBand=] for short.

* Kevin being interviewed by [[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wWEk34VwcvU&pp=ygUMYWRhbSBjb25vdmVy Adam Conover.]] For the first hour, the interview goes pretty well, and both are very professional. However, the interview eventually goes off the rails after Kevin mentions Music/TheWiggles.