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-->'''Eric:''' I don’t know how to say this, so I’m gonna choose my words very carefully... I think you’re a ''psycho''. I wanna get as far away from you as I possibly can.

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-->'''Eric:''' Okay, Corina, um, I don’t know how to say this, so I’m gonna choose my words very carefully... I think you’re a ''psycho''. I wanna get as far away from you as I possibly can.
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** Eric’s [[SarcasmMode oh-so tactful]] way of saying he wants to break up.
-->'''Eric:''' I don’t know how to say this, so I’m gonna choose my words very carefully... I think you’re a ''psycho''. I wanna get as far away from you as I possibly can.
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** “'''''[[CheckPlease CHECK!!!]]''' ''[[CheckPlease FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE BRING ME A CHECK!?]]''”

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** “'''''[[CheckPlease CHECK!!!]]''' ''[[CheckPlease [[CheckPlease FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE BRING ME A CHECK!?]]''”
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** [[CheckPlease "CHECK! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE BRING ME A CHECK!"]]

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** [[CheckPlease "CHECK! “'''''[[CheckPlease CHECK!!!]]''' ''[[CheckPlease FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, WILL SOMEONE PLEASE BRING ME A CHECK!"]]CHECK!?]]''”

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* In "City Slackers", when Frankie and Joey are constantly the victim of strange happenings while Frankie plays pool against a pro: balls jump out of holes, balls dance around, they get stacked on top of each other, they ''burst'' into dust when hit.

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* In "City Slackers", when Eric claims to be a grandmaster at pool, citing a supposed scar he has as coming from an 8-ball tournament in Mexico City, ''[[OlderThanTheyLook 1964]]''.
**
Frankie and Joey Eric are constantly the victim of strange happenings while Frankie plays pool against a pro: they play pool: balls jump out of holes, balls dance around, they get stacked on top of each other, they ''burst'' ''burst into dust dust'' when hit.hit... Ultimately, 15 hours pass, and ''none of the balls'' are sunk.
--->'''Mr. Williams''': (after the exploding ball incident) Saw that coming. [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer No. Really. I did.]]
** And then you get the kicker in the {{Stinger}}: after being left alone at the pool table, Eric takes one shot, [[spoiler:and ''all of the balls'' go into the holes]].
--->'''Eric''': (defeated; accepting) Just like Mexico... (drops the cue; leaves)



** From the same episode, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYihf3zrcp4 Eric's dream job]]. ''[[EarWorm When a crime breaks out/All the cute girls shout/Get the Good Looking Guy!]]''

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** From the same episode, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYihf3zrcp4 Eric's dream job]]. ''[[EarWorm When a crime breaks out/All out / All the cute girls shout/Get shout / Get the Good Looking Guy!]]''

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* "Only creeps and weirdos are awake now." ''[Door opens]'' "How're you doin'?" Turns out the creeps and weirdos are Shawn, Eric, and Feeny.

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* "Only creeps and weirdos are awake now." ''[Door opens]'' "How're you doin'?" Turns out the creeps and weirdos are Shawn, Eric, and Feeny."
* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7QM1ECiNGw "You brought pudding to college!"]]

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-->'''Mr. Turner:''' Not yet
-->'''Cory:''' So have you ever had, you know?



-->'''Mr. Turner:''' Hey who are you Mike Wallace?

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-->'''Mr. Turner:''' Hey Hey, who are you you? Mike Wallace?
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* Several of the interviews in "Wake Up Little Cory" when Cory and Topanga are working on their project for Literature/TheScarletLetter
** The failed attempt to interview Feeny:
-->'''Cory:''' What's your opinion on love and sex?
-->'''Feeny:''' My opinion is, not on school property?
** After Mr. Turner say sex can't exist without love:
-->'''Cory:''' Have you ever been in love?
-->'''Mr. Turner:''' What?
-->'''Cory:''' You said ''you know what'' can't exist without love and if you've had ''you know what'' and you weren't in love then ''you know what'' must've not been good.
-->'''Mr. Turner:''' Hey who are you Mike Wallace?
** And after Amy compares sex to voting
-->'''Alan:''' Sex is just like voting, you go behind the curtain, do your thing, and do it again, in 4 years.
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--> '''Feeny''': It's not something I brag about.

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--> '''Feeny''': [[GagEcho It's not something I brag about.about]].

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* Feeney goes out of town for a weekend and Shawn opens up a bed and breakfast in his house. The entire plot is hilarious with Cory wondering what is wrong with the universe that Shawn appears to be getting away with it before Feeney reveals the cab driver gave them away ("The cab driver! I forgot to deport the cab driver!")... but then during the end credits, Feeney is trying to get the couple who missed check-out out of his bedroom (the honeymoon suite) and Topanga, who was dressed up as the maid through it all walks into frame, sees Feeney, her eyes go wide, and she turns right around, completely unseen by him.

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* Feeney Feeny goes out of town for a weekend and Shawn opens up a bed and breakfast in his house. The entire plot is hilarious with Cory wondering what is wrong with the universe that Shawn appears to be getting away with it before Feeney Feeny reveals the cab driver gave them away ("The cab driver! I forgot to deport the cab driver!")... but then during the end credits, Feeney Feeny is trying to get the couple who missed check-out out of his bedroom (the honeymoon suite) and Topanga, who was dressed up as the maid through it all walks into frame, sees Feeney, Feeny, her eyes go wide, and she turns right around, completely unseen by him.



* When Jack records Shawn sleeptalking: "I'm going to the market to pick up some eggs." "If you rub two eggs together, you get a spark." "My head's on fire. Somebody please put me out."
** Even better, Jack argues that Shawn was sleeptalking AND snoring at the same time (to which Shawn argues one could only do one or the other). His tape included snores between pauses of dialogue.

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* When Jack records Shawn sleeptalking: sleep-talking: "I'm going to the market to pick up some eggs." "If you rub two eggs together, you get a spark." "My head's on fire. Somebody please put me out."
** Even better, Jack argues that Shawn was sleeptalking sleep-talking AND snoring at the same time (to which Shawn argues one could only do one or the other). His tape included snores between pauses of dialogue.



--> '''Feeny''': "She kicked me, he bit me, and some little punk kept saying 'Leave them alone. They should get married.'"
--> '''Shawn''': "I was cute then, huh?"
--> '''Feeny''': "Precious"

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--> '''Feeny''': -->'''Feeny''': "She kicked me, he bit me, and some little punk kept saying 'Leave them alone. They should get married.'"
--> '''Shawn''': -->'''Shawn''': "I was cute then, huh?"
--> '''Feeny''': "Precious"-->'''Feeny''': "Precious."



--> '''Eric''': Feeny! You here, sit now!
--> '''Mr Feeny''': Eric, don't use that ton--
--> '''Eric''': Dean Bolander.
--> '''Mr Feeny''': ''[Sits down]'' Okay, what've you got?

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--> '''Eric''': -->'''Eric''': Feeny! You here, sit now!
--> '''Mr -->'''Mr. Feeny''': Eric, don't use that ton--
--> '''Eric''': -->'''Eric''': Dean Bolander.
--> '''Mr -->'''Mr. Feeny''': ''[Sits down]'' Okay, what've you got?



-->'''Mr. Feeny''': (annoyed) All right, everybody out!
-->*Cue everyone but Mr. Feeny and Eric leaving the classroom



--> '''Cory & Shawn''': ''[Absolutely deadpan]'' Oh no. It's Feeny.
--> '''Mr Feeny''': What's going on in here?
--> '''Cory''': Nothing.
--> '''Shawn''': We didn't break this stuff.
--> '''Mr Feeny''': Then who did?
--> '''Cory''': YOU DID!
--> '''Shawn''': And we're telling!

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--> '''Cory -->'''Cory & Shawn''': ''[Absolutely deadpan]'' Oh no. It's Feeny.
--> '''Mr -->'''Mr. Feeny''': What's going on in here?
--> '''Cory''': -->'''Cory''': Nothing.
--> '''Shawn''': -->'''Shawn''': We didn't break this stuff.
--> '''Mr -->'''Mr. Feeny''': Then who did?
--> '''Cory''': -->'''Cory''': YOU DID!
--> '''Shawn''': -->'''Shawn''': And we're telling!



-->(Eric misses in his attempt at attacking Topanga and lands on the floor)
-->'''Eric''': (feebly) Help.
-->'''Mr. Feeny''': I quit. I just do.



** Cory grabbing the key to the honeymoon suite out of Eric's hand, grabbing Topanga, and all but sprinting out of the ballroom as she whoops.

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** * Cory grabbing the key to the honeymoon suite out of Eric's hand, grabbing Topanga, and all but sprinting out of the ballroom as she whoops.



* In "The War," the prank war divides the group - and Eric objects. To Feeney. Who responds completely deadpan.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': Mr. Matthews, I have no idea what you're talking about. And that's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh, I like it.

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* In "The War," the prank war divides the group - and Eric objects. To Feeney.Feeny. Who responds completely deadpan.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': Mr. Matthews, I have no idea what you're talking about. [[WaxingLyrical And that's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh, I like it.]]



--> I got two stupid boys! Y'all embarass me in front of my dead friends!
* In the finale, Eric does one last "Feeny call" before a montage plays of his best "feeny calls" from over the years: [[http://youtu.be/m-BB-Xk9xYY FEE-HEE-HEE-HEEEENAY!]]

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--> I got two stupid boys! Y'all embarass embarrass me in front of my dead friends!
* In the finale, Eric does one last "Feeny call" before a montage plays of his best "feeny "Feeny calls" from over the years: [[http://youtu.be/m-BB-Xk9xYY FEE-HEE-HEE-HEEEENAY!]]
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* In the episode ''A Affair To Forget'', Shawn dates a girl who doesn't want him to see Cory anymore. The scene where he talks to Cory secretly on the phone, only to have them argue over who will hang up first, than long for each other silently on both ends of the phone is laugh out loud funny.
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* "Prom-ises, Prom-ises"
** The back-and-forth bedroom shuffle that happens at the climax of the episode, where Alan and Amy and Cory and Topanga just manage to get adjacent hotel rooms. Alan walks in on Topanga and Cory walks in on Amy. HilarityEnsues. And ''then'' Eric - having overheard his father and completely misunderstanding - shows up, thinking Alan is cheating on Amy.
-->'''Eric''': Dad? Topanga? Cory? Mom? ''[{{beat}}]'' '''Man''' I am out of the loop.
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* Life's tough, get a helmet.

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* [[https://youtu.be/9PzprzoQF1A Life's tough, get a helmet.helmet]].
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** Even better, Jack argues that Shawn was sleeptalking AND snoring at the same time (to which Shawn argues one could only do one or the other). His tape included snores between pauses of dialogue.

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* In "By Hook or By Crook," Shawn standing up to his giant [[HonestJohnsDealership Uncle John]] to get Mr. Turner a fair price on repairs for his bike.
-->'''Shawn''': You treat him right, okay?
-->'''Uncle John''': Like family.
-->'''Shawn''': '''''No!'''''
** And after the guy hands Turner a $1500 bill after an estimate of $300, Shawn intervenes again.
-->'''Shawn''': This is my teacher. And if you hurt him, I hurt you.
-->'''Uncle John''': Is that a threat?
-->'''Shawn''': ''[{{beat}}]'' Yes.
-->'''Uncle John''': ''[{{beat}}]'' [[SoProudOfYou My brother's son!]]
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** The other plot in the episode focuses around a family project Cory is working on, and Feeney's point that [[ParentsAsPeople there are no ''perfect'' parents]], and life doesn't come with a script.
-->'''Cory''': I guess it's easy to sound smart when you have the best writers in Hollywood writing everything you say.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': [[SelfDeprecation I wouldn't know.]]
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** Alan then gives Eric a surprisingly reasonable talking-to about how he should really think it through before trying to be a model. Eric's reaction?
-->'''Eric''': ''[after a three-second pause]'' I want to be a supermodel.
-->'''Alan''': ''[double {{Facepalm}}]'' ''Okay.''
-->'''Amy''': Really?
-->'''Alan''': Yes really. I am not the type of father who dismisses his son's well-considered aspirations with some quickly tossed-off parental negativity.
-->'''Cory''': That's it?
-->'''Alan''': '''''Shut up!'''''

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* The EstablishingCharacterMoment for Feeney and Corey.

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* The EstablishingCharacterMoment for Feeney and Corey.Cory.



-->'''Corey''': Oh yeah, she does. Now I gotta get the taste of this shredded wheat out of my mouth.

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-->'''Corey''': -->'''Cory''': Oh yeah, she does. Now I gotta get the taste of this shredded wheat out of my mouth.



-->'''[[MouthyKid Corey]]''': Oh thanks, Mr. Feeney. And please enjoy that high-vitamin astronaut drink ''you're'' sucking down.

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-->'''[[MouthyKid Corey]]''': Cory]]''': Oh thanks, Mr. Feeney. And please enjoy that high-vitamin astronaut drink ''you're'' sucking down.



* Corey's dad keeps having to bail on planned father-son bonding because of emergencies at the store - a flood of broken Perrier bottles meeting a hundred thousand Alka-seltzer tablets, a grease fire because someone put lighter fluid next to the rotisserie cookers...but it's his ''reaction'' to these that sells it.
-->'''Mr. Matthews''': ''[shrugs]'' Just a small grease fire. Tomorrow we'll have a sale on blackened chicken.

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* Corey's Cory's dad keeps having to bail on planned father-son bonding because of emergencies at the store - a flood of broken Perrier bottles meeting a hundred thousand Alka-seltzer tablets, a grease fire because someone put lighter fluid next to the rotisserie cookers...but it's his ''reaction'' to these that sells it.
-->'''Mr. Matthews''': -->'''Alan''': ''[shrugs]'' Just a small grease fire. Tomorrow we'll have a sale on blackened chicken.



** From the same episode, Cory taping a water gun under his dad's side of the table so the two of them can have some fun hosing down the rest of the family. His mom complains that it's unfair since the rest of them are unarmed, and Cory invites her to check under ''her'' side of the table. There isn't anything there.
--->'''Cory''': What, you think I'm made of money?
* From "Model Family"
-->'''Eric''': ''[lounging on the kitchen island]'' Don't hate me because I'm beautiful.
** Later in the episode, Cory's mom and dad have refrained from interfering at Amy's request, letting Eric decide on his own to get his money back from what appears to be a modeling scam. Eric comes back having signed up for it as a career.
-->'''Amy''': Alan, I'm letting you out of your cage.
-->'''Alan''': ''[tosses his paper over his head]'' '''''Thank you!''''' ''[runs after Eric]''



** Corey grabbing the key to the honeymoon suite out of Eric's hand, grabbing Topanga, and all but sprinting out of the ballroom as she whoops.

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** Corey Cory grabbing the key to the honeymoon suite out of Eric's hand, grabbing Topanga, and all but sprinting out of the ballroom as she whoops.
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* Corey's dad keeps having to bail on planned father-son bonding because of emergencies at the store - a flood of broken Perrier bottles meeting a hundred thousand Alka-seltzer tablets, a grease fire because someone put lighter fluid next to the rotisserie cookers...but it's his ''reaction'' to these that sells it.
-->'''Mr. Matthews''': ''[shrugs]'' Just a small grease fire. Tomorrow we'll have a sale on blackened chicken.
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* The EstablishingCharacterMoment for Feeney and Corey.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': A candy bar? Doesn't your mother feed you a proper breakfast?
-->'''Corey''': Oh yeah, she does. Now I gotta get the taste of this shredded wheat out of my mouth.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': You know, you're not doing your body any favors loading up on junk like that.
-->'''[[MouthyKid Corey]]''': Oh thanks, Mr. Feeney. And please enjoy that high-vitamin astronaut drink ''you're'' sucking down.
-->'''[[DeadpanSnarker Mr. Feeney]]''': There's no gravity in space, Mr. Matthews, therefore astronauts suck ''up''. '''Learn from them.'''

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-->'''Jack''': Get a new job, buy a beautiful house, and hire a security guard to shoot you on sight if you ever come near my property.

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-->'''Jack''': Get a new job, buy a beautiful house, and [[BreadMilkEggsSquick hire a security guard to shoot you on sight if you ever come near my property.]]


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* In "The War," the prank war divides the group - and Eric objects. To Feeney. Who responds completely deadpan.
-->'''Mr. Feeney''': Mr. Matthews, I have no idea what you're talking about. And that's the way, uh-huh, uh-huh, I like it.
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* Jack mentioning that being a hero ''would'' look good on his resume.
-->'''Jack''': Get a new job, buy a beautiful house, and hire a security guard to shoot you on sight if you ever come near my property.
-->'''Eric''': That sounds a little hostile, but I wish you well!
-->'''Jack''': Aw, now I feel bad...''[the two hug]''
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** Corey grabbing the key to the honeymoon suite out of Eric's hand, grabbing Topanga, and all but sprinting out of the ballroom as she whoops.
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-->'''Animal Control Man:''' It looks like...A GREAT BIG LION!
-->'''Shawn:''' Oh, well, that's not our pig!

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-->'''Animal Control Man:''' It looks like... [[SarcasmMode A GREAT BIG LION!
LION]]!
-->'''Shawn:''' Oh, well, that's not [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial our pig!pig]]!



-->'''Shawn:''' It sure is, my little Cory. [the pig comes down the stairs] Okay, who shaved the dog?

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-->'''Shawn:''' It sure is, my little Cory. [the pig comes down the stairs] [[ImplausibleDeniability Okay, who shaved the dog?dog]]?



'''Mr. Williams''': Did you two know you were fighting each other?

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'''Mr. Williams''': [[HeterosexualLifePartners Did you two know you were fighting each other?
other]]?
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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" ''I'm'' sick?! You know what's "sick", everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, and you know what I've gotten in all that time? ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING!'''''

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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" ''I'm'' sick?! You know what's "sick", everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, ''seventeen years'', and you know what I've gotten in all that time? DO YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE GOTTEN IN ALL THAT TIME?! ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING!'''''SOMETHING!!!'''''
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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" ''I'm'' sick?! You know what's sick, everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, and you know what I've gotten in all that time? ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING!'''''

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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" ''I'm'' sick?! You know what's sick, "sick", everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, and you know what I've gotten in all that time? ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING!'''''
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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" I'm sick?! You know what's sick, everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, and you know what I've gotten in all that time? ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING'''!''

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-->'''Cory:''' "That's sick?" I'm ''I'm'' sick?! You know what's sick, everyone?! We have been in a relationship for SEVENTEEN YEARS, and you know what I've gotten in all that time? ''LET ME '''TOUCH SOMETHING'''!''SOMETHING!'''''
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** What he says in his "proposal" to her though: "Topanga, marry me and let's make nick-nick!"
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** The follow up is even better - Cory's parents try to make Cory have Eric as his best man. Cory just sits there, [[ThisIsGonnaSuck knowing what's coming.]]

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** The follow up second part is even better arguably funnier - Cory's parents try to make Cory have Eric as his best man. Cory just sits there, [[ThisIsGonnaSuck knowing what's coming.]]

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