History Funny / BillEngvall

1st Jul '15 3:17:56 AM SventheCrusader
Is there an issue? Send a Message


** "The guy's flying the plane, and I'm sitting in the back, going "'''[[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl AHHHH! AHHH! AHHH!]]'''" And then he turns the plane upside-down--''We're flying upside-down!'' And here I am, a 45-year-old man, and I'm screaming "'''MAMA!''' '''''MAMA!'''''" He flips the plane back over, looks back at me, and says, "You alright back there?" And I go, "'''''WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?'''''""

to:

** "The guy's flying the plane, and I'm sitting in the back, going "'''[[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl AHHHH! AHHH! AHHH!]]'''" And then he turns the plane upside-down--''We're flying upside-down!'' And here I am, a 45-year-old man, and I'm screaming you can hear me, at 49 years old, on the cockpit tape, screaming, "'''MAMA!''' '''''MAMA!'''''" He flips the plane back over, looks back at me, and says, "You alright back there?" And I go, "'''''WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?'''''""
29th Jun '15 5:43:07 PM N1KF
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* "HERE'S THE LITTLE GIRL NARROW PADS, DADDYYYYY!!!" "...Thank you, son. Listen, I don't think they heard you in [[SuddenlyShouting SCOTLAND!!!]]"

to:

* "HERE'S THE LITTLE GIRL NARROW PADS, DADDYYYYY!!!" DADDYYYYY!" "...Thank you, son. Listen, I don't think they heard you in [[SuddenlyShouting SCOTLAND!!!]]"SCOTLAND!]]"



** "The guy's flying the plane, and I'm sitting in the back, going "'''[[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl AHHHH!!!! AHHH!!!! AHHH!!!!]]'''" And then he turns the plane upside-down--''We're flying upside-down!'' And here I am, a 45-year-old man, and I'm screaming "'''MAMA!!!!''' '''''MAMA!!!!!!!!'''''" He flips the plane back over, looks back at me, and says, "You alright back there?" And I go, "'''''WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?!?!?'''''""

to:

** "The guy's flying the plane, and I'm sitting in the back, going "'''[[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl AHHHH!!!! AHHH!!!! AHHH!!!!]]'''" AHHHH! AHHH! AHHH!]]'''" And then he turns the plane upside-down--''We're flying upside-down!'' And here I am, a 45-year-old man, and I'm screaming "'''MAMA!!!!''' '''''MAMA!!!!!!!!'''''" "'''MAMA!''' '''''MAMA!'''''" He flips the plane back over, looks back at me, and says, "You alright back there?" And I go, "'''''WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!?!?!?'''''""THAT!?'''''""



*** The idea of riding an electric floor buffer is ''also'' especially funny if you have ever served in the military. Go ahead and YouTube it.

to:

*** The idea of riding an electric floor buffer is ''also'' especially funny if you have ever served in the military. Go ahead and YouTube Website/YouTube it.
26th Apr '15 9:35:18 AM AFP
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

*** The idea of riding an electric floor buffer is ''also'' especially funny if you have ever served in the military. Go ahead and YouTube it.
28th Mar '15 5:03:13 PM Anicomicgeek
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* Earlier in the same skit, his daughter asked him to pick up "some BarenakedLadies". He gets excited and says "don't tell your mama" until he realizes that it's a band.

to:

* Earlier in the same skit, his daughter asked him to pick up "some BarenakedLadies".Music/BarenakedLadies". He gets excited and says "don't tell your mama" until he realizes that it's a band.
31st Dec '14 11:49:49 AM TwoGunAngel
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* One time, his son asked him "Daddy, what's petting?" Cue Bill saying "Hell, it's been soŚ" before getting punched by his wife. "Apparently your mother wants me to explain it to you." He then starts to talk about the birds and the bees, and then when his son becomes confused, Bill says, "Wait a minute, spell it." "P-E-D X-I-N-G." "That'd be a crosswalk, son." "I know, but what was that other thing?" Bill now looks to his wife, who says, "You threw the lure, you reel it back in."
* His entire bit about getting to fly in an F-16 at Nellis Air Force Base, it's especially funny if you have ever served in the United States Air Force and/or worked on aircraft because because it's not as exaggerated as you might believe.[[labelnote:''Fun Fact'']]All conversations that happen in aircraft with ground control are recorded, so that part where he is talks about screaming like a little girl? The probably still have it and laugh at it whenever they want to.[[/labelnote]]

to:

* One time, his son asked him "Daddy, what's petting?" Cue Bill saying "Hell, it's been soŚ" before getting punched by his wife. "Apparently your mother wants me to explain it to you." He then starts to talk about the birds and the bees, and then when his son becomes confused, Bill says, "Wait a minute, spell it." "P-E-D X-I-N-G." "That'd be a crosswalk, son." "I know, but what was that other thing?" Bill now looks to his wife, who says, "You threw the lure, you reel it back in."
* His entire bit about getting to fly in an F-16 at Nellis Air Force Base, it's especially funny if you have ever served in the United States Air Force and/or worked on aircraft because because it's not as exaggerated as you might believe.[[labelnote:''Fun Fact'']]All conversations that happen in aircraft with ground control are recorded, so that part where he is talks about [[ScreamsLikeALittleGirl screaming like a little girl? The girl]]? They probably still have it and laugh at it whenever they want to.[[/labelnote]]
31st Dec '14 11:44:03 AM nombretomado
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* During one of the Blue Collar shows, JeffFoxworthy tells a "You might be a redneck" joke which involves emptying the back of a truck by driving backwards really fast and slamming on the brakes. Cue Bill proudly raising his hand to identify ''himself'' as the inspiration for that joke.

to:

* During one of the Blue Collar shows, JeffFoxworthy Creator/JeffFoxworthy tells a "You might be a redneck" joke which involves emptying the back of a truck by driving backwards really fast and slamming on the brakes. Cue Bill proudly raising his hand to identify ''himself'' as the inspiration for that joke.
30th Aug '14 12:02:07 AM Seanette
Is there an issue? Send a Message


-->[high fives from Ron and Larry the Cable Guy]
30th Aug '14 12:01:45 AM Seanette
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

** Also in one of the Blue Collar shows, the [[NoodleIncident story about Bill and the floor buffer]]:
-->'''Jeff''': [during Jeff's "You Might Be a Redneck"] If you have ever ridden an electric floor buffer...
-->'''Bill''': [raising his hand, embarrassed] All right, wait, wait, ''wait''! Tequila was involved, ''get off me''!
-->'''Jeff''': [turning to Ron White] I wonder how many times his wife has said that!
-->[high fives from Ron and Larry the Cable Guy]
2nd Oct '13 2:09:03 PM shadowblack
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* His entire bit about getting to fly in an F-16 at Nellis Air Force Base, it's especially funny if you have ever served in the United States Air Force and/or worked on aircraft because because it's not as exaggerated as you might believe.[[hottip:''Fun Fact'':All conversations that happen in aircraft with ground control are recorded, so that part where he is talks about screaming like a little girl? The probably still have it and laugh at it whenever they want to.]]

to:

* His entire bit about getting to fly in an F-16 at Nellis Air Force Base, it's especially funny if you have ever served in the United States Air Force and/or worked on aircraft because because it's not as exaggerated as you might believe.[[hottip:''Fun Fact'':All [[labelnote:''Fun Fact'']]All conversations that happen in aircraft with ground control are recorded, so that part where he is talks about screaming like a little girl? The probably still have it and laugh at it whenever they want to.]][[/labelnote]]
30th Aug '13 9:29:51 PM ManCalledTrue
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

** "What're we gonna get, daddy?" ''"A gun to kill myself."''
This list shows the last 10 events of 17. Show all.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.BillEngvall