History Funny / Batman

5th Oct '17 6:30:29 PM AriRockefeller
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** It also gave us this immortal exchange between Bats and Joker:
--->'''Joker''': You can say that over the phone, Batman, but if I had you here, I'd pound you to a pulp! ''(hangs up)''\\
''(Batman walks out from behind a curtain, his own phone in hand)''\\
'''Batman''': [[BeCarefulWhatYouWishFor Start pounding, Joker]]!\\
'''Joker''': ''(screams)''



* This exchange with The Joker, after Batman foiled Joker's plans to burn a whole load of renaissance paintings by switching them with much lower quality works by Alfred:
-->'''Joker''': You can say that over the phone, Batman, but if I had you here, I'd pound you to a pulp! ''(hangs up)''\\
''(Batman walks out from behind a curtain, his own phone in hand)''\\
'''Batman''': [[BeCarefulWhatYouWishFor Start pounding, Joker]]!\\
'''Joker''': ''(screams)''



to:

* This exchange with The Joker, after Batman foiled Joker's plans to burn a whole load of renaissance paintings by switching them with much lower quality works by Alfred:
-->'''Joker''': You can say that over the phone, Batman, but if I had you here, I'd pound you to a pulp! ''(hangs up)''\\
''(Batman walks out from behind a curtain, his own phone in hand)''\\
'''Batman''': [[BeCarefulWhatYouWishFor Start pounding, Joker]]!\\
'''Joker''': ''(screams)''



5th Oct '17 6:27:12 PM AriRockefeller
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* This exchange with The Joker:

to:

* This exchange with The Joker:Joker, after Batman foiled Joker's plans to burn a whole load of renaissance paintings by switching them with much lower quality works by Alfred:
15th Aug '17 9:34:27 AM TheWildWestPyro
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* Issue #28 of Batman Rebirth has this conversation between Selina and Bruce:
-->'''Batman:''' Why haven't you [[EnemyCivilWar taken a side?]]\\

to:

* Issue #28 of Batman Rebirth has this conversation between Selina and Bruce:
Bruce in the middle of the [[EnemyCivilWar War of Jokes and Riddles]]:
-->'''Batman:''' Why haven't you [[EnemyCivilWar taken a side?]]\\side?\\
15th Aug '17 9:33:16 AM TheWildWestPyro
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'''Selina:''' OK, yes. But in my defense, I did warn you. I'm not exactly ''[[MeaningfulWords unsuccessful]]''.

to:

'''Selina:''' OK, yes. But in my defense, I did warn you. I'm not exactly ''[[MeaningfulWords unsuccessful]]''.''unsuccessful''.
15th Aug '17 9:32:56 AM TheWildWestPyro
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'''Catwoman:''' I'm not like them. They're criminals.
'''Batman:''' You're currently breaking into a safe that's not yours.
'''Catwoman:''' You know what I mean. I'm not like them. They're ''unsuccessful'' criminals.
'''Batman:''' Do I need to worry about you?
'''Catwoman:''' (amused) Are you checking up on me, Bat? Are you trying to ''protect'' me?
'''Batman:''' No. No one needs to protect you.
'''Catwoman:''' Oh. Well then, yes. You ''very'' much have to worry about me.
(They kiss)
'''Bruce:''' (In the present) Afterward, I slept. When I woke, you were gone. With the diamonds.

to:

'''Catwoman:''' I'm not like them. They're criminals.
criminals.\\
'''Batman:''' You're currently breaking into a safe that's not yours.
yours.\\
'''Catwoman:''' You know what I mean. I'm not like them. They're ''unsuccessful'' criminals. \n \\
'''Batman:''' Do I need to worry about you?
you?\\
'''Catwoman:''' (amused) Are you checking up on me, Bat? Are you trying to ''protect'' me?
me?\\
'''Batman:''' No. No one needs to protect you.
you.\\
'''Catwoman:''' Oh. Well then, yes. You ''very'' much have to worry about me.
me.\\
(They kiss)
kiss)\\
'''Bruce:''' (In the present) Afterward, I slept. When I woke, you were gone. With the diamonds.\\
15th Aug '17 9:32:36 AM TheWildWestPyro
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** As the sequence ends she descends lower and lower on Joker's suit until she goes offscreen. Judging by Joker's dazed, incredulous expression it's almost like she's about to give him a blowjob.

to:

** As the sequence ends she descends lower and lower on Joker's suit until she goes offscreen. Judging by Joker's dazed, incredulous expression incredulous, expression, it's almost like she's about to give him a blowjob.


Added DiffLines:

* Issue #28 of Batman Rebirth has this conversation between Selina and Bruce:
-->'''Batman:''' Why haven't you [[EnemyCivilWar taken a side?]]\\
'''Catwoman:''' I'm not like them. They're criminals.
'''Batman:''' You're currently breaking into a safe that's not yours.
'''Catwoman:''' You know what I mean. I'm not like them. They're ''unsuccessful'' criminals.
'''Batman:''' Do I need to worry about you?
'''Catwoman:''' (amused) Are you checking up on me, Bat? Are you trying to ''protect'' me?
'''Batman:''' No. No one needs to protect you.
'''Catwoman:''' Oh. Well then, yes. You ''very'' much have to worry about me.
(They kiss)
'''Bruce:''' (In the present) Afterward, I slept. When I woke, you were gone. With the diamonds.
'''Selina:''' OK, yes. But in my defense, I did warn you. I'm not exactly ''[[MeaningfulWords unsuccessful]]''.
29th Jul '17 9:37:34 AM appealus
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Added DiffLines:

** Bob seems ready to jump into the fray armed with a machete after his comrades have failed and Batman (with a wicked smirk) beckons him over. Que Bob [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere dropping the weapon and running for all he's worth.]]
18th Jul '17 3:47:13 PM AriRockefeller
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Added DiffLines:

** When told that King Tut has purchased a plot of land adjacent to Wayne estates, Batman notes that [[SkewedPriorities it'll probably drive real estate values straight down]].
11th Jul '17 5:01:20 PM SarcasmKid
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** "Let's go to the blind taste test. Uh oh! He's been using ''[[BrandX Brand Xxxxxsssssssssss]].''"

to:

** "Let's go to the blind taste test. Uh oh! He don't look so good. He's been using ''[[BrandX Brand Xxxxxsssssssssss]].''"
5th Jul '17 5:28:49 PM AriRockefeller
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Added DiffLines:

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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.Batman