History Funny / ArcCorp

'''Raven:''' For fuck's sake!

* [[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/83/ Chapter 83]]: When Raven talks about the last time she and Jaune dealt with an anomaly, Blake perks up when she hears that [[NaughtyTentacles tentacles were involved]]... only to quickly banish any perverted thoughts when Raven continues on to talk about them melting human flesh.

** When they finally finish assembling it, Jaune notes that doesn't match the nearby cupboards. Jaune backtracks and calls it a fantastic stylistic choice when Blake threatens to shoot him. The joke comes full circle when Saphron not only notices the new desk during the audit, but attempts to add it as one of the issues that needs to be addressed by the next inspection.

** After [[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/30/Arc-Corp Chapter 30]] introduced the concept of roving gangs in the madhouse of Mountain Glenn, Coeur muses about TheApunkalypse and Film/MadMax-style thugs, realizing that within the lore he's set up (no powered vehicles) such gangs would look very different.

** The other villains trying and failing to mask their laughter when Blake calls out Adam for being a PsychoExBoyfriend who she literally jumped off a speeding train to get away from.

---> Jaune and Blake [[LockedInARoom locked in a basement]], eh? Sounds like a Coeur al'Aran recipe for some steamy romanc-- oh wait, there's a dead body being eaten alive and now they're about to be drowned and torn to pieces... Sounds like a recipe for some steamy ''[[{{Squick}} vore]]'' romance!

--> '''[[spoiler: Juniper]]:''' "On the bright side, I got to kill a mime."\\

** Jaune's completely blasé response to Cinder's threats, with the entire interaction ending with him simply shrugging when she runs off [[WeWillMeetAgain while swearing revenge]].

** In the middle of the chapter, when Jaune confidently says that Ruby can't possibly have gotten into too much trouble back in Vale, there's a DescriptionCut to the miniature planet in the Containment Branch office, where its denizens are preparing to prostate themselves to Ruby, who they worship as a god, after which we learn she's turned the office into a huge mess of junk food wrappers, take-out food boxes, and dirty clothing.

** Blake entering the office and casually discussing her love life, with Jaune and even Amber giving their thoughts and advice on the matter... with all three ignoring that Blake just walking in on her employer and his sister being held at gunpoint. Blake apologizes when she notices how annoyed Mercury and Emerald are becoming.

** Before Ruby can properly explain what's going on with the above, Jaune takes her exclamation that she's now matched with Blake at face value and awkwardly congratulates her.

* [[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/69/ Chapter 69]]: The reveal that the matchmaking anomaly has updated the app to now show the whole world the faces of Arc Corp agents is horrifying, but it's hard not to chuckle when Ruby throws in the fact that one of the individuals she tested the new update on was her dog Zwei, who matched with "someone called Nicholas Arc".

** Blake is terrified by a pile of dolls in the child's bedroom, demanding that Jaune burn them immediately. Jaune tries remind her that ghosts aren't real and that they can't assume some random toys are possessed... only for the pile to fall over unprompted. After a {{beat}}, he leaves the room to find matches.

** To dissuade a woman from trying to unmask the man she just had sex with, since he's actually a werewolf, Blake ends up giving an impassioned speech about the "spirit of furrydom". It ends up being so moving that it prompts a huge GroupHug... with Blake stuck in the center, screaming in horror. SmashCut to a few days later, where a befuddled Ruby and several bystanders are watching Jaune hose down Blake in front of their office building with a power washer.

*** Apparently Jaune's mother tried to kill Salem, twice and Salem still remembers her as a sweet young woman. Coincidently, Salem's full name is Rebecca Juniper Salem.

** When meeting with Ruby to talk about the matchmaker app anomaly, she reveals that Yang got matched with Blake, who she only remembers as "the girl in the suit" from the invisible semblance case, and that the revelation has thrown Yang into a sexuality crisis.

** Despite desperately trying to avoid the subject, it turns out that Ruby herself got match with Jaune. As Blake tries to calm her down, she points out that Ruby at least got someone already has a crush on... which shocks Ruby, as she thought she hid her feelings pretty well. Blake awkwardly responses that she always thought it was obvious.

** Blake and Pyrrha almost ''immediately'' start going at each other's throats, forcing Terra to break them up before it turns violent, all while Jaune and Saphron ignore them in favor of their own thinly-veiled argument.

** Pyrrha ends up being the one most put off by the entire mission, as it turns out that Darren not only deeply lusts over her to the point that his desktop background is just a series of (poorly-made) deepfake nudes of the former athlete, but ''they were also matched by the app'' and believes that she become so mindless enamored with him once they start dating that he'll easily be able to sell nudes and sell sex tapes of her. Blake can barely hide her amusement as Pyrrha gets more and more upset hearing him speak.

* [[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/69/ Chapter 69]]: The reveal that the matchmaking anomaly has updated the app to now show the whole world the faces of Arc Corp agents is a shocking moment that rightfully startles our main characters, but the reader would be forgiven for chuckling at the fact one of the individuals Ruby tested the new update on was her dog Zwei, who matched with "someone called Nicholas Arc".

* [[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/67/ Chapter 67]]:

* [[https://m.fanfiction.net/s/14066102/68/ Chapter 68]]:

* Chapter 68:
The anomaly showing the whole world the faces of Arc Corp agents is not funny. Ruby having Zwei use the app and him matching with Nicholas Arc, who Ruby doesn;t know, is very funny.

** When Pyrrha naturally rejects him for being so vile, Darren starts going on a rant about how girls only ever go for stupid jocks while motioning towards Jaune, who can only silently a finger at himself in bafflement, considering he doesn't fit that title even if Pyrrha did like him.

** When Pyrrha rejects him, Darren starts going on a rant about how girls only ever go for stupid jocks, while motioning towards Jaune, who points a finger at himself in bafflement, considering he doesn't fit that title even if Pyrrha did like him.

** Pyrrha ends up being the one most put off by the entire mission, as it turns out that Darren not only deeply lusts over her to the point that his desktop background is just a series of deepfake nudes of the former athlete, but ''they were also matched by the app'' and that she become so mindless enamored with him once they start dating that he'll easily be able to sell nudes and sell sex tapes of her. Blake can barely hide her amusement as Pyrrha gets more and more upset hearing him speak.

** When meeting with Ruby to talk about the matchmaker app anomaly, it is revealed that Yang got matched with Blake, who she only remembers as the girl in the suit from the case of the invisible semblance guy. Ruby then states Yang's going through a crisis of sexuality.
** Ren and Nora were matched with each other and are now insufferable to be around.
** Ruby herself got match with Jaune, with Blake figuring it out before Ruby could tell her and stated her crush on him was obvious.
** Sun makes his debut in the story by also being matched with Blake. She immediately panics when she realizes this when he spots her from outside the cafe she and Ruby are in and tries leave, though Ruby points out that she will just run right into him. Then Blake desperately asks Ruby for advice on what to do.
** Ruby realizing that she is a CluelessDudeMagnet when Blake points out that she is cute, small, and into boyish hobbies, then remembers a few boys who asked to hang out and make weapons together, and one who wanted to go to a weapons expo with her. She shuts down for a brief while at the revelation.
** Turns out Ruby wasn’t the only one to get matched with Jaune, as when Blake returns to the office she catches the tail end of an argument between Jaune and the one who was matched with him, Miltia Malachite, who storms off when he turns her down flat. Then it turns out that Pyrrha used the app and also got matched with him. She was apparently appalled by the match.