History Funny / AndThenThereWereNone

'''Lombard''': [[EvilIsSexy Well, that will make for some interesting evenings at home, won't it?]]

----

--> '''Vera''': Was it heart failure?
--> '''Dr Armstrong''': Well her heart certainly failed to beat.

* [[spoiler:Blore's death]] in the 1945 film.
--> "I ''get'' it!"
--> [[spoiler: *splat*]]

-> '''Blore:''' "He had the key to the dining room, fact. He unlocks the door, takes a little Indian, goes out and chops up some sticks, fact. And then..."\\

--> '''Dr Armstrong''': [[ImADoctorNotAPlaceholder I'm a doctor, not a detective]].

---> '''Miss Brent''': I'd suggest prayer.
---> '''Judge Wargrave''': I'm not adverse to prayer, Miss Brent. But I would supplement it with a locked door.
** Upon discovery of [[spoiler:Rogers' body]]:
---> '''Blore''': He's dead.
---> '''Patrick''': Yes. We don't need Dr Armstrong to tell us that.

** Lombard accusing Patrick after [[spoiler:the General's murder]]:
---> '''Patrick''': Yes. He seemed to know he was going to die.
---> '''Lombard''': Could that have been because you were swinging a rock at his head??
** No one believing that Dr Armstrong is a teetotaler:
--->'''Patrick''': Dr Armstrong, if it will relieve your mind as all, I don't think there's anyone alive on this island who truly believes that you are a teetotaler.
--->'''Dr Armstrong''': Somehow that doesn't relieve my mind one bit
--->'''Patrick''': You protest too much... then eye the drinks table as if it were mana from Heaven... you sneak off to your room to "freshen up" every chance you get.

--->'''Dr Armstrong''': We're all a bit late this morning! I slept the clock round.
--->'''Judge Wargrave''': A sign of a clear conscience, doctor? Or just a nightcap or two?

--->'''Dr Armstrong''': You had no right to speak to me that way at breakfast!
--->'''Miss Brent''': Didn't I? It's still morning and you're drunk already.

-->[[SarcasmMode Candy? Ice cream? The next feature will be beginning shortly]]
** When Patrick is asking everyone who they suspect is Mr Owen, they all give rather brutally honest summaries of each other.

--->'''Wargrave''': Blore is all bluster. I'm past my prime. Armstrong is easily manipulated. Miss Brent's Bible provides all her answers. Miss Claythorne is like a deer caught in onrushing headlights. Which is why I suppose you and Mr Lombard find her so attractive.

-->'''Lombard''': You may get the killer. But I intend to get the girl.
-->'''Patrick''': [[DatingCatwoman What if she's the killer?]]
-->'''Lombard''': [[EvilIsSexy Well, that will make for some interesting evenings at home, won't it?]]

* At the end of Christie's stage play, Lombard, whom Claythorne believed she has shot dead but was actually only grazed by her bullet, gets up and [[BigDamnHeroes saves her by shooting Wargrave dead]]. In the wake of this, his casually sexist line "Thank God women can't shoot straight!" usually gets a laugh from the audience.

--> '''Miss Brent''': I'd suggest prayer.
--> '''Judge Wargrave''': I'm not adverse to prayer, Miss Brent. But I would supplement it with a locked door.

--> '''Blore''': He's dead.
--> '''Patrick''': Yes. We don't need Dr Armstrong to tell us that.

--> This island has two types of weather: gloomy and slightly less gloomy. I'm taking advantage of this brief 'slightly less' respite.

--> '''Patrick''': Yes. He seemed to know he was going to die.
--> '''Lombard''': Could that have been because you were swinging a rock at his head??

-->'''Patrick''': Dr Armstrong, if it will relieve your mind as all, I don't think there's anyone alive on this island who truly believes that you are a teetotaler.
-->'''Dr Armstrong''': Somehow that doesn't relieve my mind one bit
-->'''Patrick''': You protest too much... then eye the drinks table as if it were mana from Heaven... you sneak off to your room to "freshen up" every chance you get.

-->'''Dr Armstrong''': We're all a bit late this morning! I slept the clock round.
-->'''Judge Wargrave''': A sign of a clear conscience, doctor? Or just a nightcap or two?

-->'''Miss Brent''': Doctor, I will thank you to keep your opinions to yourself. Coming from the bottom of a bottle as they do, they are worse than useless.

-->'''Dr Armstrong''': You had no right to speak to me that way at breakfast!
-->'''Miss Brent''': Didn't I? It's still morning and you're drunk already.

-->'''Lombard''': (on Judge Wargrave) The whole thing just smacks criminal justice gone wrong. From what Vera tells me, he let that Seton chap swing just for the jollies.

-->'''Rogers''': (on Miss Claythorne): And she's the least likely suspect with drunken doctors, wily judges, religious zealots, cowardly hunters and you... whatever you are... running about.

-->'''Wargrave''': Blore is all bluster. I'm past my prime. Armstrong is easily manipulated. Miss Brent's Bible provides all her answers. Miss Claythorne is like a deer caught in onrushing headlights. Which is why I suppose you and Mr Lombard find her so attractive.

-->'''Lombard''': You may get the killer. But I intend to get the girl

-->'''Patrick''': What if she's the killer?
-->'''Lombard''': Well, that will make for some interesting evenings at home, won't it?

* In the 2015 BBC adaptation, while explaining why he attends the execution of every man he sentences to hang, Judge Wargrave mentions that ''[[ComicBook/SpiderMan "With great power comes great responsibility"]].''
* Also from the 2015 BBC adaptation: Lombard confronts Blore about him taking the longest to join the others. Blore initially refuses to talk about it, but eventually admits that his delay was caused by... wait for it... [[PottyEmergency constipation]]. This causes everyone else to burst out laughing.

* In the 2015 BBC miniseries, Lombard's summation of Blore:
-->'''Lombard''': Any faith I had in the thin blue line evaporated the instant I met you, tubs.
** And of Dr. Armstrong:
-->'''Lombard''': You are first class, five-star, solid gold ''[[PrecisionFStrike fucking]]'' moron!

* In the play, Rogers realizes Blore is a fake.

--> '''Dr Armstrong''': [[ImADoctorNotAPlaceholder I'm a doctor not a detective]]
** This exchange

--> '''Judge Wargrave''': I'm not adverse to prayer Miss Brent. But I would supplement it with a locked door.
** Upon discovery of [[spoiler:Rogers' body]]

** Even Miss Brent gets on the game
--> This island has two types of weather: gloomy and slightly less gloomy. I'm taking advantage of this brief 'slight less' respite.
** Lombard accusing Patrick after [[spoiler:the General's murder]]

--> '''Lombard''': Could that have been because you were swinging a rock at his head.
** No one believing that Dr Armstrong is teetotal

-->'''Patrick''': You protest too much... then eye the drinks table as if it were mana from Heaven... you sneak off to your room to "freshen up" every chance you get

-->'''Lombard''': (on Judge Wargrave) The whole thing just smacks criminal justice gone wrong. From what vera tells me, he let that Seton chap swing just for the jollies.

-->'''Rogers''': (on Miss Claythorne): And she's the least likely suspect with drunken doctors, wily judges, religious zealots, cowardly hunters and you... whatever you are... running about

* In the 2015 BBC adaptation, while explaining why he attends the execution of every man he sentences to hang, Judge Wargrave mentions that ''[[ComicBook/SpiderMan "With great power comes great responsibility"]]''

* Also in the film, the pileup of men spying on each other, which eventually circles around to an embarrassed Dr. Armstrong realizing three people are standing behind him as he peeps through a keyhole.

--> [[spoiler: *splat*]]