History DarthWiki / UselessNotes

25th Aug '17 6:49:31 PM nombretomado
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** [[SovietRussiaUkraineAndSoOn The Soviet Union]] may have had a brief scuffle with Germany too, OrSoIHeard, but it was unimportant because the Soviets were bad guys anyway.

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** [[SovietRussiaUkraineAndSoOn [[UsefulNotes/SovietRussiaUkraineAndSoOn The Soviet Union]] may have had a brief scuffle with Germany too, OrSoIHeard, but it was unimportant because the Soviets were bad guys anyway.
15th Aug '17 5:58:56 PM WillyFourEyes
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* When your opponent is transforming into their ultimate form, which will power them up enough to easily defeat you, you ''must'' sit and wait for their lengthy transformation process to be complete.

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* When your opponent is [[OneWingedAngel transforming into their ultimate form, form]], which will power them up enough to easily defeat you, you ''must'' [[TransformationIsAFreeAction you]] ''[[TransformationIsAFreeAction must]]'' [[TransformationIsAFreeAction sit and wait for their lengthy transformation process to be complete. complete]].



* The moon is made of cheese and was formed by the curdling of milk coming from the Milky Way, and like the sun, [[TheManInTheMoon it has a sentient face on it]]. It also harbors life, consisting of [[Film/ATripToTheMoon a civilization of acrobats in tights whose one weakness is being hit with an umbrella.]]

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* [[CheesyMoon The moon is made of cheese cheese]] and was formed by the curdling of milk coming from the Milky Way, and like the sun, [[TheManInTheMoon it has a sentient face on it]]. It also harbors life, consisting of [[Film/ATripToTheMoon a civilization of acrobats in tights whose one weakness is being hit with an umbrella.]]



** The moon can support life due to an atmosphere and near-earth gravity that makes it a perfect location for [[Franchise/SailorMoon fantastical pre-historic utopian moon kingdoms]] and [[MightyMorphinPowerRangers evil mages bent on conquering the earth one monster at a time]] alike.
** When the moon goes through it's phases and becomes a crescent, it actually physically changes shape. Scientists sometimes attribute this phenomenon to it's cheese-covered surface being eaten by space mice.

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** The moon can support life due to an atmosphere and near-earth gravity that makes it a perfect location for [[Franchise/SailorMoon fantastical pre-historic utopian moon kingdoms]] and [[MightyMorphinPowerRangers [[Series/MightyMorphinPowerRangers evil mages bent on conquering the earth one monster at a time]] alike.
** When the moon goes through it's its phases and becomes a crescent, it actually physically changes shape. Scientists sometimes attribute this phenomenon to it's its cheese-covered surface being eaten by space mice.



* People who pronounce Uranus "Yer-uhn-us" are just too embarrassed to say "Your anus", which is the true pronunciation.
* Pluto actually experiences emotions, and was greatly depressed when the humans on Earth stopped calling it a planet.

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* [[UranusIsShowing People who pronounce Uranus "Yer-uhn-us" are just too embarrassed to say "Your anus", which is the true pronunciation.
pronunciation]].
* Pluto actually experiences emotions, and was greatly depressed when [[PlutoIsExpendable the humans on Earth stopped calling it a planet.planet]].



* Human meat is apparently like cat nip to Tyrannosaurs. Whenever they meet time traveling humans or are cloned in modern times, they're likely to pass up even a Triceratops carcass just to chase and devour a human.

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* Human meat is apparently like cat nip to Tyrannosaurs. Whenever they meet time traveling time-traveling humans or are cloned in modern times, they're likely to [[GangUpOnTheHuman pass up even a Triceratops carcass just to chase and devour a human.human]].



* All feathered dinosaurs lived in China

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* All feathered dinosaurs lived in ChinaChina.



* The bones in the human body are made of an as of yet undiscovered yet incredible durable material. Except for the head, so you can hit someone as hard as you want anywhere else because the worst they'll suffer is maybe a broken bone and most likely they'll just get a sprain.

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* The bones in the human body are made of an as of yet undiscovered yet incredible durable as-of-yet-undiscovered-yet-incredibly-durable material. Except for the head, so you can hit someone as hard as you want anywhere else because the worst they'll suffer is maybe a broken bone and most likely they'll just get a sprain.



* Clams are not filter feeders. They use pearls as a bait.

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* Clams are not filter feeders. [[ClamTrap They use pearls as a bait.bait]].



** This goes double if the bugs are extra terrestrial, in which case they will find some way to the brain and begin mind-controlling the victim.

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** This goes double if the bugs are extra terrestrial, extraterrestrial, in which case they will [[PuppeteerParasite find some way to the brain and begin mind-controlling the victim.victim]].



* Though the GovernmentConspiracy (and Series/MythBusters) don't want you to know it, ordinary household chemicals can be turned into AppliedPhlebotinum which can do everything from [[EducationThroughPyrotechnics create massive fireballs]] to [[PsychoSerum make you insane]] [[WithGreatPowerComesGreatInsanity though superpowered]] if you just [[TechnicolorScience add a little food coloring]].

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* Though the GovernmentConspiracy (and the Series/MythBusters) don't want you to know it, ordinary household chemicals can be turned into AppliedPhlebotinum which can do everything from [[EducationThroughPyrotechnics create massive fireballs]] to [[PsychoSerum make you insane]] [[WithGreatPowerComesGreatInsanity ([[WithGreatPowerComesGreatInsanity though superpowered]] superpowered]]) if you just [[TechnicolorScience add a little food coloring]].



** However, [[AndSomeOtherStuff you'll have to figure out the ingredients on your own]].



* The majority of gemstones found weigh about 100 to 2000 carats. The largest gemstones often exceed [[TreasureIsBiggerInFiction a size of a car]].

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* The majority of gemstones found weigh about 100 to 2000 carats. The largest gemstones often exceed [[TreasureIsBiggerInFiction a the size of a car]].



** Derived from the above theory: A given object can be destroyed by a set, specific number of methods and none others.

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** Derived from the above theory: A given object can be destroyed by a set, specific number of methods and none others.other.
15th Aug '17 5:42:16 PM WillyFourEyes
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* Dreams follow everyday logic, just without all the denial and stuff. When you dream about the past, it's all going to be in a chronological, rational, and accurate way --as if you were trying to give an imaginary witness a little window into your soul. [[VideoGame/KnightsOfTheOldRepublic Also, it's OK for two people to have exactly the same well-ordered, chronological dream about the past ''at the same time''.]]

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* Dreams follow everyday logic, just without all the denial and stuff. [[PsychicDreamsForEveryone When you dream about the past, it's all going to be in a chronological, rational, and accurate way --as way--as if you were trying to give an imaginary witness a little window into your soul.soul]]. [[VideoGame/KnightsOfTheOldRepublic Also, it's OK for two people to have exactly the same well-ordered, chronological dream about the past ''at the same time''.]]



* Dreams never include content which would be banned when shown in public.

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* Dreams never include content which would be [[TooHotForTV banned when shown in public.public]].



* People can always speak even in moments before dying.

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* People can always speak [[LastWords even in moments before dying.dying]].



* Landing a large fall is harmful or nearly fatal. However, hitting your head or slamming into a wall is perfectly safe even at very high speeds.
** When you land, you'll make a hole shaped exactly like yourself.

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* Landing a large fall is harmful or [[NotTheFallThatKillsYou nearly fatal.fatal]]. However, hitting your head or slamming into a wall is perfectly safe even at very high speeds.
** [[EfficientDisplacement When you land, you'll make a hole shaped exactly like yourself. yourself]].



* If you get stabbed in a vital area, all you have to do is pull it out and throw it at your attacker. It will heal in only 1 hour.

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* If you get stabbed in a vital area, all you have to do is pull it out and [[ThrowingYourSwordAlwaysWorks throw it at your attacker.attacker]]. It will heal in only 1 hour.



* Anything labeled organic is automatically healthy. Organic sugar? Sure, go right ahead, shovel spoonfuls of it into your mouth, it's good for you!

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* [[AllNaturalSnakeOil Anything labeled organic is automatically healthy.healthy]]. Organic sugar? Sure, go right ahead, shovel spoonfuls of it into your mouth, it's good for you!



** Then he pressed Down, Down/Right, Right punch and declared the light with a hadouken.

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** Then he [[Franchise/StreetFighter pressed Down, Down/Right, Right punch Right, Punch]] and declared the light with a hadouken.[[KamehameHadoken hadouken]].



* Neither Good nor Evil will ever triumph over one another, as the forces of good [[CrazyPrepared have a plan]] [[MemeticMutation in place to defeat any plan the villains could put into play]], while the [[EvilPlan forces of evil plan to be defeated in order to advance their evil goals]].

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* [[BalanceBetweenGoodAndEvil Neither Good nor Evil will ever triumph over one another, another]], as the forces of good [[CrazyPrepared have a plan]] [[MemeticMutation in place to defeat any plan the villains could put into play]], while the [[EvilPlan forces of evil plan to be defeated in order to advance their evil goals]].



* The end times are always near. Every time the date of the end of the world and TheRapture comes and goes without anything happening, it's just because the Southern Baptist pastor who swore that was the date just forgot to carry the 1 in his complex mathematical equation. He's ''sure'' to get it right next time.

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* [[TheWorldIsAlwaysDoomed The end times End Times are always near. near]]. Every time the date of the end of the world and TheRapture comes and goes without anything happening, it's just because the Southern Baptist pastor who swore that was the date just forgot to carry the 1 CarryTheOne in his complex mathematical equation. He's ''sure'' to get it right next time.



** Everything made in TheSixties was extremely high-quality and original, and all of it topped the charts back then.

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** Everything made in TheSixties was [[NothingButHits extremely high-quality and original, and all of it topped the charts back then.then]].



** Music/{{Daft Punk}} are rouge robots trying to undo kraftworks deeds by giving us some robot rock!

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** Music/{{Daft Punk}} are rouge rogue robots trying to undo kraftworks Kraftwerk's deeds by giving us some robot rock!



* Majority of people listen to only one genre of music.

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* Majority The majority of people listen to only one genre of music.



* Without SillyLoveSongs, the entire music industry as we know it would ''collapse''.
* [[VideoGame/GuitarHero Remember, no]] [[Music/LedZeppelin Stairway]].
** [[Film/WaynesWorld Denied!]]



* [[RightMakesMight When the good guy gets into a fight with a bad guy, the good guy will always win.]] Don't worry if the bad guy appears to have 30 kg more of muscle or has extreme martial arts training. The UnstoppableRage of being right always wins even if you weigh 55 kg and sit in front of a computer all day.

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* [[RightMakesMight When the good guy gets into a fight with a bad guy, the good guy will always win.]] Don't worry if the bad guy appears to have [[MusclesAreMeaningless 30 kg more of muscle muscle]] or has [[HardWorkHardlyWorks extreme martial arts training.training]]. The UnstoppableRage of being right always wins even if you weigh 55 kg and sit in front of a computer all day.
18th Jun '17 5:01:18 PM nombretomado
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* The vast, frozen CommieLand called [[FakeRussian Russia]] is a mysterious [[GeographicFlexibility geographic anomaly]], simultaneously visible from Alaska (would [[Creator/TinaFey Sarah Palin]] lie to you?) and bordering the DeepSouth of the United States ([[GlobalIgnorance how else could they invade Georgia?]]). [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield It might also be near Europe or Asia or something]], according to [[ThatOtherWiki less-than-reliable accounts]].

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* The vast, frozen CommieLand called [[FakeRussian Russia]] is a mysterious [[GeographicFlexibility geographic anomaly]], simultaneously visible from Alaska (would [[Creator/TinaFey Sarah Palin]] lie to you?) and bordering the DeepSouth of the United States ([[GlobalIgnorance how else could they invade Georgia?]]). [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield It might also be near Europe or Asia or something]], according to [[ThatOtherWiki [[Wiki/ThatOtherWiki less-than-reliable accounts]].
24th May '17 4:50:59 PM KingBowser9001
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# There is no three.

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# [[ThereIsNoRuleSix There is no three.three]].
13th Apr '17 8:01:42 PM AHI-3000
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* Anything bad that happens to you or your people is ''always'' the fault of some other ethnic group, religious sect, social class, political party, government, corporation, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking subculture, rival sports team, or pop-cultural fandom]]. You should never, never, ''never'' accept blame or responsibility for yourself, nor recognize the humanity of others.
13th Apr '17 7:58:21 PM AHI-3000
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* See the {{Stereotype}}s page for more information. Every generalization you see is 100% true for every single member of a particular group of people.

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* See the {{Stereotype}}s page for more information. Every generalization you see is 100% true for every single member of a any particular group of people.people.
* Anything bad that happens to you or your people is ''always'' the fault of some other ethnic group, religious sect, social class, political party, government, corporation, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking subculture, rival sports team, or pop-cultural fandom]]. You should never, never, ''never'' accept blame or responsibility for yourself, nor recognize the humanity of others.
6th Apr '17 10:16:29 AM vtarira
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Added DiffLines:

** Russia has only two geographical and climate zones. One is Moscow, where the weather is always cloudy but mild, enabling the best view of [[https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0Ob6UfqSJf0/UDqCE74HB5I/AAAAAAAAD-o/_KOASx4mC78/s1600/St-Basils-Cathedral-3.jpg its only landmark]]. This building is named St. Basil's but is also often called the Kremlin and houses the entire Russian government (itself an alternate name for the KGB). Meanwhile, everything outside of Moscow is Siberia. Siberia contains only trees, political prisoners, and a year-round blanket of several feet of snow, and the temperature never rises above -40.
5th Apr '17 10:11:51 PM AHI-3000
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* If you're [[TheAce skilled]] and badass enough, you can [[OneManArmy easily and single-handedly defeat dozens of enemies at once]].

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* If you're [[TheAce skilled]] and badass {{badass| normal}} enough, you can [[OneManArmy easily and single-handedly defeat dozens of enemies at once]].once]]. It doesn't matter if [[AttackAttackAttack you just rush into combat guns-blazing without any real strategy or tactics]] to take on a large horde of [[{{Mooks}} expendable enemies]] who [[ConservationOfNinjutsu overwhelmingly outnumber you]]; they're all useless and no match for you.
** Hell, if you're expert in [[CombatParkour acrobatics]] and [[ArtisticLicenseMartialArts melee combat]], you can easily dispose of enemies who wield [[GunsAreWorthless ranged weapons]], logic be damned.
** Dodging the enemies' attacks is not too difficult. Even if you do get injured, [[OnlyAFleshWound it's rarely serious and you'll likely recover in a short amount of time]].
28th Mar '17 2:34:48 PM Josef5678
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Compare ThingsWeHaveLearntFromMedia, only that is what media has taught us, while this is things we are trying to teach others, sort of.

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Compare ThingsWeHaveLearntFromMedia, JustForFun/ThingsWeHaveLearntFromMedia, only that is what media has taught us, while this is things we are trying to teach others, sort of.



* Dreams follow everyday logic, just without all the denial and stuff. When you dream about the past, it's all going to be in a chronological, rational, and accurate way --as if you were trying to give an imaginary witness a little window into your soul. [[KnightsOfTheOldRepublic Also, it's OK for two people to have exactly the same well-ordered, chronological dream about the past ''at the same time''.]]

to:

* Dreams follow everyday logic, just without all the denial and stuff. When you dream about the past, it's all going to be in a chronological, rational, and accurate way --as if you were trying to give an imaginary witness a little window into your soul. [[KnightsOfTheOldRepublic [[VideoGame/KnightsOfTheOldRepublic Also, it's OK for two people to have exactly the same well-ordered, chronological dream about the past ''at the same time''.]]



* [[KatanasAreJustBetter it makes perfect sense to bring a katana or some kind of sword into battle even though your enemies are equipped with rocket launchers, heavy machine guns, and assault rifles]].

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* [[KatanasAreJustBetter it It makes perfect sense to bring a katana or some kind of sword into battle even though your enemies are equipped with rocket launchers, heavy machine guns, and assault rifles]].



* Space travel is rather easy and fun because [[ConvenientlyClosePlanet planets are just a few kilometers away from earth]] and [[SpaceisNoisy since sound travels just fine,]][[BatmanCanBreatheInSpace people can actually open the windows of their spacecraft and talk to each other and to other passing space travellers]]. Just be sure to be wary of [[AsteroidThicket traveling through an asteroid belt and possibly being hit by rocks the size of vans]], or [[UnrealisticBlackHole those pesky black holes that come out of nowhere and such everything.]]

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* Space travel is rather easy and fun because [[ConvenientlyClosePlanet planets are just a few kilometers away from earth]] and [[SpaceisNoisy since sound travels just fine,]][[BatmanCanBreatheInSpace fine,]] [[BatmanCanBreatheInSpace people can actually open the windows of their spacecraft and talk to each other and to other passing space travellers]]. travelers]]. Just be sure to be wary of [[AsteroidThicket traveling through an asteroid belt and possibly being hit by rocks the size of vans]], or [[UnrealisticBlackHole those pesky black holes that come out of nowhere and such suck everything.]]



* [[HelloNurse Nurses are always sexy, no matter what.]] [[NightmareFuel Unless they're the Joker in drag.]] [[FetishFuel Even then, some people may still find it sexy.]]

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* [[HelloNurse [[HospitalHottie Nurses are always sexy, no matter what.]] [[NightmareFuel Unless they're the Joker in drag.]] [[FetishFuel Even then, some people may still find it sexy.]]



* [[{{Animeland}} Japan]] is still bitter towards the US over losing WorldWarTwo, and are retaliating by turning innocent white American children into rice-munching, cosplaying, Pokemon-playing otakus so that when they bomb Pearl Harbor again every American under the age of 25 will join in the overthrow of the US government. The GratuitousJapanese trope names on ThisVeryWiki is evidence of their scheme.

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* [[{{Animeland}} Japan]] is still bitter towards the US over losing WorldWarTwo, UsefulNotes/WorldWarTwo, and are retaliating by turning innocent white American children into rice-munching, cosplaying, Pokemon-playing otakus so that when they bomb Pearl Harbor again every American under the age of 25 will join in the overthrow of the US government. The GratuitousJapanese trope names on ThisVeryWiki is evidence of their scheme.



* UsefulNotes/TheTroubles are basically a bunch of good Irish freedom lovers fighting the [[EvilBrit evil British imperialists.]] And anyone who try's to tell you otherwise is obviously one of the before mentioned evil British imperialists. [[BritishNazis Or one of their Nazi allies.]]

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* UsefulNotes/TheTroubles are basically a bunch of good Irish freedom lovers fighting the [[EvilBrit evil British imperialists.]] And anyone who try's tries to tell you otherwise is obviously one of the before mentioned evil British imperialists. [[BritishNazis Or one of their Nazi allies.]]



* South America (no not that [[DeepSouth South America]]) is a big rain forest, where people make coffee beans and cocaine. There aren't really any independent countries there, at least if there are they aren't very important. Environmentalists like to whine about trees being cut down there, or something.
** Brazil (the only country in South America), is a primitive BananaRepublic [[TheCapitalOfBrazilIsBuenosAires whose capital is Buenos Aires]]. Like all Mexicans, they speak Spanish and all have brown skin. They live in jungles villages full of monkeys, snakes and drug dealers. Men wear big sombreros and ponchos, take long naps in the middle of the street and drink tequila. Women walk around naked showing their well-trimmed pubic hair and dance flamenco. ''Olé!''

to:

* South America (no (no, not that [[DeepSouth South America]]) is a big rain forest, where people make coffee beans and cocaine. There aren't really any independent countries there, at least if there are they aren't very important. Environmentalists like to whine about trees being cut down there, or something.
** Brazil (the only country in South America), is a primitive BananaRepublic [[TheCapitalOfBrazilIsBuenosAires whose capital is Buenos Aires]]. Like all Mexicans, they speak Spanish and all have brown skin. They live in jungles and villages full of monkeys, snakes snakes, and drug dealers. Men wear big sombreros and ponchos, take long naps in the middle of the street and drink tequila. Women walk around naked showing their well-trimmed pubic hair and dance flamenco. ''Olé!''



* PartsUnknown exists and has '''many''' suburbs, including, just to start, [[Wrestling/TheDudleyBoys "Dudleyville"]], [[Wrestling/{{Boogeyman}} "The Bottomless Pit"]], and [[Wrestling/KevinSullivan "The Iron Gates of Fate"]]. [[Wrestling/JohnCena The Prototype]], however, was too awesome for just ''one'' community, and had to leave "Classified" for {{Area 51}}. Similarly, [[Wrestling/JohnTenta the Shark]] left "Tsunami" for "The Great Barrier Reef." That said, some of these communities are nicer than others. For example, [[Wrestling/TheNastyBoys "Nastyville"]]'s tourism and real estate bureaus were both defunded years ago, and [[Wrestling/KevinNash "Emerald City"]] and [[Wrestling/ScottHall "The Diamond Mine"]] aren't doing much better. Oddly, many graduates of its fine educational system have tended to migrate to [[Wrestling/{{CHIKARA}} Philadelphia]]. [[Wrestling/TheOneManGang "Deepest Darkest Africa"]] and[[Wrestling/TheBlueMeanie "Pepperland"]] are doing better. Sadly, though, [[Wrestling/DoinkTheClown the mayor of "Circus City"]] recently passed away, and the town may never recover.

to:

* PartsUnknown exists and has '''many''' suburbs, including, just to start, [[Wrestling/TheDudleyBoys "Dudleyville"]], [[Wrestling/{{Boogeyman}} "The Bottomless Pit"]], and [[Wrestling/KevinSullivan "The Iron Gates of Fate"]]. [[Wrestling/JohnCena The Prototype]], however, was too awesome for just ''one'' community, and had to leave "Classified" for {{Area 51}}. Similarly, [[Wrestling/JohnTenta the Shark]] left "Tsunami" for "The Great Barrier Reef." That said, some of these communities are nicer than others. For example, [[Wrestling/TheNastyBoys "Nastyville"]]'s tourism and real estate bureaus were both defunded years ago, and [[Wrestling/KevinNash "Emerald City"]] and [[Wrestling/ScottHall "The Diamond Mine"]] aren't doing much better. Oddly, many graduates of its fine educational system have tended to migrate to [[Wrestling/{{CHIKARA}} Philadelphia]]. [[Wrestling/TheOneManGang "Deepest Darkest Africa"]] and[[Wrestling/TheBlueMeanie and [[Wrestling/TheBlueMeanie "Pepperland"]] are doing better. Sadly, though, [[Wrestling/DoinkTheClown the mayor of "Circus City"]] recently passed away, and the town may never recover.



* [[Literature/TheHitchikersGuideToTheGalaxy 42 is the answer to the ultimate question of Life, the Univese and Everything.]]

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* [[Literature/TheHitchikersGuideToTheGalaxy [[Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy 42 is the answer to the ultimate question of Life, the Univese Universe and Everything.]]



* The newest piece of technology, whether it be an iphone, computer, TV or game console, will be in style forever and will not ever be replaced by a newer model. So you should always buy the newest thing.

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* The newest piece of technology, whether it be an iphone, iPhone, computer, TV TV, or game console, will be in style forever and will not ever be replaced by a newer model. So you should always buy the newest thing.
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